i am my every emotion
i am anger
i am red
i am blood splatter on filthy walls;
exploding veins and exploding stars;
sharp teeth sinking into tender flesh
i am the guttural screams
of children and men, predator
and prey, sinner
and saint
alike
i am love
i am holy
i am a warmth all encompassing;
an easy heart missing several chunks;
a surrendered soul
i am a beggar on bruised knees
without a home besides you
or riches except your eyes and your
lips and your
lies
i am terror
i am static
i am hungry monsters in heavy shadows -
no, i am a child cowering under the covers
watched by glowing eyes
and not by god; not by the angels my
faithless tongue calls out for
i am a body buried alive and i am
cracked fingernails clawing at the lid of a
casket
i am misery
i am void
i am an infinite vacuum; a black hole
and i can't find a star in myself
because i am not space
i am both the thing that consumes it
and the thing consumed by it
i am not a name; i am not a memory
and i haven't a map to find the
light
i am jealousy
i am sick
i am empty hands reaching for ghosts;
an endless echo bouncing off deaf ears;
dust, because i am
what becomes of forgotten things
i am clenched fists and broken noses
i am pining and i am
pathetic and i am so, so
sorry
because i am my every emotion
and all my emotions turn bad