A/N: A little bit more build up and learning in this chapter.
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"So you're a movie buff?" Camila asked as she scoured Lauren's collection in general curiosity. "Particularly in horror films, thrillers, and general scare the shit out of you type flicks, judging by what I see here." That was a shocker. She was expecting Lauren to be the romantic comedy type or even to dabble in the intellectual independent variety. Then again, she did have quite a few of those too.
Lauren was in the kitchen pouring them a glace of wine with a sheepish grin on her face. "Yeah...I have one of those oddly deep explanations for that as well."
"I like your deep reasoning." Camila remarked as she studied the back of a BluRay case with a furrowed brow. "It means you actually think about things, not just do what is expected or normal." Her brow deepened and she hushed her voice. "Because this is definitely not a normal movie."
"I heard that by the way." Camila jumped at the closeness of the Lauren's voice and peeked over her shoulder. No more than three inches from her face was her glass of wine being offered to her by the smiling photographer. She accepted it with a blush. "Thank you and sorry. But what is your deep and thought-provoking reasoning for your desire to be scared out of your mind?"
Lauren sat down next to the diva and joined her in her exploration of all of her movies. She had so many she had forgotten about half of them. "You spend most of you life laughing, crying, happy, or sad. You know, content. That is what the fast majority of movies cover when it comes to emotions. I don't find those sufficient to quench my thirst for escapism. Now, fear. That isn't an emotion you feel very often, so when you do, it is exhilarating. I'm talking about something that makes you feel alive more than you normally would."
"So...you feel more alive while watching other people run for theirs? That's a little sadistic."
Lauren shook her head. "No, no, no. I'm not sick like that. I don't feel alive because of what is causing the fear, just the fear itself. Like rollercoasters or sky diving or being held at gun point." She joked. "Movies are just the safest way."
"I see. Well, then you may find my collection of classic musicals a little too tame for your taste." Lauren tweaked her eyebrows in silent agreement. "So, I now know that you like scary movies and actually being scared. What else?" The diva abandoned the movies and turned to face Lauren while sipping her wine. "Hmm? What are your guilty pleasures, your weaknesses. Dish the dirt."
"The dirt?" Lauren teased. "You're suppose to work for that. I can't just go spilling all of my secrets."
"I'm willing to work for them." Camila retorted leaning forward and taking her girlfriend's lips with hers. She braced herself on her hands and pressed further into the kiss, deepening it with desire. Lauren brought a hand up to the brunette's face and cupped it gently, massaging her thumb against the diva's cheek. She could so easily fall into this trap. Camila pulled back from the kiss to look into Lauren's eyes. "How much work does it require for an answer?"
Lauren bit her bottom lip playfully as she diverted her eyes in contemplation. "Depends on the specific question."
Camila moved back in to kiss her but hesitated just before their lips touched and moved to lightly kiss her neck instead. "Where is your favorite place to be kissed?" Lauren let out a breathy laugh. "Besides that place. Somewhere I can kiss you and not be breaking my promise to myself of keep this slow."
The diva placed another kiss a little higher on her neck. "You're getting warmer." This time Camila brushed her lips up the photographer's neck until she sensed the slight tremor rip through her body and placed another kiss. Lauren's breath caught and she grabbed the diva's arm in encouragement. "There."
Camila smiled and kissed it again before moving up to suckle her earlobe. She walked on her hands, further into Lauren's space, until the raven haired woman began to give in and lay down on the floor. Once in the dominate position, Camila allowed her hands to wander, searching for the soft skin she so desperately wanted to touch. Her hand found the connection as the tips of her fingers moved from Lauren's hip to just under the hem of her shirt.
"S-slow?"
The diva halted her lips and pulled back, hovering over the photograper who was already panting with her eyes shut, trying to regain some of her control. "Can we not kiss?" Camila asked as she leaned down and lightly pressed her lips to Lauren's chin, then to the underside of her bottom lip. "You are the first woman I have ever kissed and your lips are so much nicer than any man's." She placed a chaste kiss to the plump lips. "So much softer and more tempting."
Lauren let Camila kiss her once more, deepening it, but denied her access when she asked with a light graze of her tongue. "Tempting is the problem. We have a lot to cover still. What's my worst habit? What's my pet peeve? What still manages to piss me off in a split second no matter how calm I may seem to be?"
Camila knew she was right. "You're spoiling my fun."
"No. I'm just trying to make it last longer than the first fight we happen to get into."
The diva relented lifting herself off of Lauren. "It's just not fair. You seem to know me so well and I have no clue about this person you have become. What I've learned, I love, but there is so much more. It's frustrating to know you in the sense of the old you, but not be able to act upon that established comfort."
Lauren hesitated, still laying on the floor with her eyes closed. "Trust me, I know. I've wanted this much more and for much longer than you have."
"Then spill your secrets."
Lauren laughed nervously as she shook her head. "If it was only that easy to open up and bare your soul."
Camila was hit with the sudden realization that why Lauren may appear a very different person in most regards, she still had a bit of her old self there. The part that was guarded, scared, damaged in many ways. Camila was asking to instantly be let in to a place where very few would be granted access after years of relationship and trust building. Sex wasn't the only aspect of their new relationship that they were going to have to take slowly. The diva sensed Lauren's vulnerability and laid down next to her on the living room floor, took her hand, and intertwined their fingers.
"Let's start with a question at a time. What is your worst habit?"
Lauren rested the back of her free hand against her forehead as she fought back the slight wave of anxiety that rushed of her when she realized that to let Camila in, she would eventually, yet again, relive all the pain of her stories. Camila knew some of what had happened in high school, but not in any significant detail. "Worst habit is this right here. Shutting people out. Being too guarded about certain things. Other than that, I'm pretty laid back."
"Pet peeve?"
She paused, still with her eyes closed, and let out a defeated sigh. "Being pushed. Even when I need to be. I'll snap at you quickly, then realize you are only helping, and come begging for forgiveness later." She explained. "Just to give you a bit of a warning."
"Appreciate that. I'll try and remember that when you are suddenly and irrationally jumping from your calm waters to raging typhoon."
Lauren turned her head to look at Camila with a dropped brow. "I said I would snap, not rip your head off."
The brunette shrugged her shoulders. "Semantics. I'm just preparing for the worst case scenario. But let's move on to something a bit more pressing." Lauren gritted her teeth in apprehension. "How do you think you are going to handle everything when it comes out? You are well known in the photography world, but you haven't had to deal with people following you and trying to take your picture. They may become very interested to the point of obsession with-"
"Obsession?" Lauren mocked playfully, not believing it would become anything that extreme. A few questions in interviews here and there and then it might die down to the occasional rumor.
"Yes, obsession. Not only are you dating someone successful, but you are successful yourself, and absolutely gorgeous. Magazines and newspapers will be dying to find out more about you...digging into you past..."
Lauren returned her eyes to the ceiling and swallowed hard. Camila was most worried about Lauren's past being pried into. Not so much about her being pestered by wannabe photographers. Having people know about how rough her and Camila's past was could very easily be twisted as humorous in the eyes of fate. But if they caught on about her daughter and the fact she was being raised by Camila's biological mother, they would eat that up to no end. Front page, cover story news as Margaret would word it.
"Do...do your parents know that you're gay? You said you haven't been back since we graduated, but you only came out three years ago..."
"No. They don't know. Actually, no one from Miami knows. Just you."
"Well, I feel special." Camila beamed with her wide 'Camila Cabello' smile and Lauren cooed at her adorableness.
"You are special, but you already knew that."
"I did, but you still haven't answered my first question. I bombarded you with a second before you had the chance to speak. How do you think you are going to handle it?"
"Oh, goodness..." Lauren exhaled forcefully as she thought about it. "I can handle the paparazzi just fine. Questions about our past will be fine. If they call up and annoy my parents for a comment, outing me in the process, I will be fine. I just worry about them finding out about the baby...whose not much of a baby anymore..." She paused and Camila squeezed her hand. Michelle would be nine now. "Mainly because I still have so many regrets about it. Do you think they would pry into that?"
Camila met Lauren's worried green eyes and forced herself to nod. With out a doubt. As soon as the found out.
She took the answer well and chuckled nervously. "Any chance they'll say, "Hey, big deal, someone else is gay' and leave us alone?"
It was Camila who laughed this time. "There is a small, unlikely, but existent possibility, no matter how improbable it may be. But we can always hope for the best."
"Yeah...Well, I do believe we have made some great progress tonight, but I am due for a shower. I have a lighting technician with a passion for hot lights."
Camila scrunched her nose. "Is that what that smell is?"
Lauren sat up straight and dropped the diva's hand. "I do not smell!...do I?" She smelled herself just in case.
Camila shook her head. "No, you don't. I was only teasing. Go take your shower. Do you have something I can wear to sleep in or is clothing optional for tonight?"
The raven haired woman glared. "I have something you can wear. And by the time I get out of the bathroom, the door to which, I will be locking...I expect you to already be dressed in them. I don't need the temptation of bare skin."
"Party pooper."
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"Are we going to be able to do this or should I sleep in the guest bedroom?" The diva asked as her girlfriend crawled into bed with her.
"That would be worse actually." Lauren stated as she curled her arm around Camila's side and locked their hands together up against the brunette's chest. "Knowing that you are just across the hall but I can't touch you would be absolute torture for me. I have to touch. You are fine just like this." She wiggled closer until their bodies were pressed tightly together and then nuzzled into Camila's neck. "Just don't turn around. If I see those eyes or lips, I'll be done for. If you kiss me, I'll be done for. If I see you smile, I'll be done for. So, just don't turn around."
"Okay. So..."
"So...?"
Camila bit down on her bottom lip to hold back her smile. "So, what's your favorite sex position?"
"Oh my God. Baby, you can not ask me things like that until I can do them to you. I understand that you are relying on me to be strong and resist you tonight, but that doesn't mean you can just give up and torture me."
There was a pause. "You called me Baby."
Lauren could hear her smile in her voice and that was killing her too. "Yeah. Is that okay? I figured it was better than the names i called you in high school. Much more loving and appropriate."
Camila fought the urge to turn around to look at Lauren's face as she talked, so she worried her bottom lip between her teeth. "That's fine. I like that. Baby."
"Baby." Lauren echoed as she pressed her smiling lips against Camila's shoulder. "So lets talk about something else besides sex."
"That would be more conducive for our situation." Camila said as she played with the fingers in her hand, studying how soft yet strong they were. How they compare to her tiny ones in length. "Did you have any particular topic in mind?"
Lauren laid there with her eyes open, concentrating on the feel of Camila's fingers running over hers, trying to visualize how it looked to have them locked together like that. "Tell me about your mom and dad. When are we going exactly?"
The diva grinned. "Are you nervous?"
She scoffed. "Of course I am! We've been together for two days and I'm already set to meet your parents. It's a little daunting. Especially since not only are they oblivious that we are dating, but that you are in fact gay."
She had never thought of it like that. It was going to be awkward. Her parents knew she was bringing Lauren with her, that the woman was someone she had known in high school, and had recently met up with in New York. However, the whole coming out thing, she would rather do face to face. She also wanted Lauren there for her strength and sureness in her own sexuality. Her encouragement was going to be needed despite the fact that Camila's parents would probably be okay with it. She didn't fear anger from them or disappointment, but uncertainty and shock. They had become accustom to her always knowing who she was and now everything had changed, and suddenly.
"So, what are their names? What are they like?" Lauren urged her, squeezing her tightly to snap her out of her thoughts.
"Their names are Alejandro and Sinu."
"Tell about their personalities. Am I going to get the cold shoulder and the 'if you hurt my daughter' speech?"
"Daddy will give you the speech but then turn around and be your best friend as soon as he is done. Mom will keep quiet until you have actually done something to hurt me. She doesn't let things go very well."
Lauren flinched. "How is she going to handle the way-"
"I told you not to worry about our past. You were a teenager then. You are a mature adult who no longer tortures me but rather loves me now. If I can forgive you, so will she."
She pulled the diva a little bit closer. "But you forgive everyone."
"Lauren, I'm dating you. They'll accept that. You are an absolute sweet heart and romantic. They'll love that. They will judge you based on what they see now, not what they know from then. Oh, and to answer your other question. We have a flight Wednesday morning. They will pick us up by the airport. We're set to fly back Sunday afternoon. Do you have any scheduling conflicts?"
Camila wasn't used to having to be accommodating for anyone else, but Lauren knew that. Plan first, ask second. "If I do, I will cancel them. I will call Kim tomorrow to find out."
The brunette furrowed her brow. "You don't know? What kind of professional are you?"
Lauren bit Camila's shoulder in response. "One who pushes their temporary assistants to find out if they are worth keeping around."
Camila laughed and leaned back into the Lauren. "I like her. I think you should hang on to her if you can."
"You're only saying that because she'll agree with anything you say because you are who you are. If we ever have a disagreement, I'll be outnumbered."
"That is a plus, but it also gives her some credibility when it comes to being trusted. When we come out, it would be nice to know your assistant isn't selling our stories or anything."
"That's a really good point. I had never thought about that."
"That's because you've never had to deal with the media like that. It will be an experience that you will likely never forget."
Lauren kissed Camila's neck and closed her eyes. "Baby, any experience with you is hard to forget."
"Well now you're just being cheesy."