I remember those days when I almost gave up
When I was convinced, I failed
I couldn't do anything better
I was done
I remember when I went out,
I was ready to meet my end somehow
Every time I said bye to someone,
I thought this might be the last time I see them
I tried to come up with possible last words
That could make this feeling less burdened
I asked myself, Will it hurt?
My body said no, but my heart said yes, a lot
I wasn't seeing the after life I wanted
I imagined the after life I will leave for my loved ones
I imagined my mom crying next to my dead corpse
I could see my dad's disappointment in me with my loss
I could see my brothers belief torn apart
I could feel all that in my heart
I would have left lots of questions
I would have made their life miserable
My pain and disappointment was nothing, than what I might have left
I couldn't do it, because they deserve the best
I couldn't let them loose
The things they taught me ever since I was born
I couldn't let it go waste
They made me a fighter
I am not going down without a fight
I want them to be proud of me
And not ashamed.
This feels like a new birth
I am born again out of splinters
My torn heart is whole again
My love for my family revived me within.