To make a long story short, I did not sleep last night. In fact, I find it hard to get myself out of bed this morning. The thought occurs to just pull all those blankets over my head and call it a day, but that's not an option.
The only thing that can make it worse is-
"Jessa!" I hear her voice before I see her. Tori doesn't knock before barging into my bedroom, her phone clutched in her hand. She walks over to me and shoves the phone in my face which reveals the picture I had just seen last night.
I push her hand away from me and grumble under my breath. Of course she'd be happy to show me.
I guess now would be the time to explain that my family doesn't know what happened between us. They just know that one day he was here and the next he was at military school. No more, no less.
"I'm well aware, Tori. Thanks for reminding me." I push myself out of bed with the energy I have. Tori rolls her eyes at me as she spreads herself over my bed.
"Shouldn't you be getting ready to, ya know, head back to college?" I ask as I hunt for some clothes to wear.
"The semester doesn't start until, like, late September, Jessa," Tori says, not looking away from her phone. "Or something like that."
"That's what I was afraid of," I say to myself.
I remember the day she finally left for college. I thought that since both of them were off living different lives, I'd be in the clear to live my own as well. That hasn't happened. Every chance they get, Sydney and Tori are home, bugging the crap out of me.
You'd think it'd be the other way around since I'm the youngest. Sydney being 21 and Tori on her way to 20, all they know how to do is succeed, never fail. Not that it's a bad thing, but as someone once told me, what's the fun in that?
It's no lie that I don't academically succeed like my two sisters. I receive B's where they earn A's. I receive a good enough where the get a great job! My teachers don't hesitate to reminisce with me the good times they had in class with my sisters. How smart and prepared they always were...
I can't help it if I always forget my pencil or my notebook. It's not in my nature to be prepared for life to the full extent.
I've also been told I'm not as "lady-like", as my mother likes to remind me of.
I grab my cheerleading bag and notice that the mustang horse printed on the side of the bag is practically staring into my soul with those dark eyes and angry face. The bag is stuffed with two pom-poms that I still have from last year.
I leave my room and choose to ignore a still chatty Tori lying on my bed. Mom is fixing a bagel when I step into the kitchen.
"Good morning," she greets as she spreads cream cheese over the bagel. I grumble in response. Mornings are not my thing, therefore replying with "Good morning" is not an option.
She sits the bagel on a paper towel and slides it across the counter to me. I give her a small smile.
"Thanks, Mom." I shove half the bagel into my mouth to get rid of the hunger I'm feeling. I never ate anything last night. Mom watches me in slight disgust – I say slight because she's getting used to it slowly.
"Really, Jessa?" She asks and I giggle. "Were you raised in a barn?"
"I wish," I tell her. She shakes her head at me and continues what she's doing.
Dad waltz's into the kitchen a moment later with a smile on his face. "Morning, ladies." He kisses Mom before taking a seat beside me on a bar stool. I smile at him as he ruffles my hair. I make a note to fix it before going out in the public.
"Got cheerleading tryouts today?" Dad asks when he sees my bag on the floor.
I sigh and hope Mom didn't hear me. "Yeah, I guess."
"You practically have a guaranteed spot on the team as captain, Jessa," Mom reminds me. "You had better be on your toes today." She gives me a stern look before taking her coffee mug and heading into her bedroom to get ready for work. I grumble and "I love you, too" as she disappears. That would be my mother – always caught up in cheerleading life instead of my life.
"Oh," Mom adds from her room. "Don't forget to study for your ACT! You're taking as soon as you can."
I look at Dad with pleading eyes. "Daddy, please shoot me."
He chuckles. "Not a chance. Just do it for your mother, okay? How bad could it be?"
I could give him a ten page paper on how bad it could be.
"You had better get going. School starts soon," Dad tells me as he sips his coffee. I raise an eyebrow.
"Says the history teacher. Aren't you going to be late?" I ask.
"No, the principal has a speech or something this morning so I'll be late, but not too late."
Dad is the senior high history teacher, and a great one at that, but he likes to test his limits, as you can tell.
I laugh and jump off my bar stool and shoving the rest of the bagel into my mouth.
"Have a good last first day!" He exclaims after I kiss his cheek and dart out the door to my car. After tossing my backpack and bag in the backseat, I head down the road to Hannah's house.
**
"Hannah, I need some advice," I whined once she slides into the car. I always pass her house on my way to school, so we've agreed to carpool.
"I have to know what happened to give you advice," she tells me. Like the best friend I know she is, she already knows what I'm talking about.
So, I tell her everything that happened at the party the other night – everything that she didn't see. I know I had my doubts, but it sounds even worse outside of my head. Connor giving me the most magical kiss he'd ever given me was no existent – a figment of my imagination.
"Maybe you should take this for a test run," Hannah explains. "You know, ask him to go on a date. Like you used to."
"Please tell me you didn't get that idea out a Nicholas Sparks book," I deadpan and Hannah chuckles.
"No, I'm just being honest." She is always the best advice0giver. I only wish I could do what she does for me.
"And I love you for that," I tell her. "But you know I'm not very good at the whole romance thing."
She laughs. "Trust me, I know. You thought giving Will some money and a card for his birthday was romantic."
"He could buy anything his cold heart desired!" I defend myself. "Please, just help me save my relationship, Han." I think about what she said about giving Will money and shake my head. "Also, we were like, 15, so shut up."
"Alright, alright. I think you should take him on a date like the first time you met," she says. I think about the first time Connor and I met and I automatically like the idea. I shrug my shoulders, not sure if he'll go along with it.
"When did you meet him?" She asks innocently. Hannah and Connor have never really gotten along. Hannah is easy to get along with, but it's awkward between the two since she won't be mean to the people she doesn't like. It is glances toward each other and polite smiles. It's like a silent war between the two.
"We met at the bowling alley last summer. We didn't start dating until December, though," I explain. I guess I never realized I hadn't told her how Connor and I met. I also didn't realize Connor and I have been together for almost a year.
"Then that sounds like a good idea. Ask him to go bowling and subtly bring up the kiss. Make sure he felt the same too." I can practically hear the sweet smile on Hannah's face.
"I'll give it a try," I say hopefully. I plan to ask him when I see him, but there is no telling how it will go.
"Jessa," Hannah says, her wise-woman voice coming out. "We're seniors this year, which means we only have a few months left... We have to make them count."
I smile. Yeah, we have to make them count. The words are now burned into my brain.
As usual, Connor is standing outside the front doors to the school when we pull into the student parking lot. I grab my backpack and leave my cheerleading bag in the car before I run up to him, hopeful for a good answer.
"Hey babe," he greets me, wrapping his arm around my shoulder. Hannah walks behind us slowly, not wanting to be in our conversation.
"Hey, what are you doing Friday night?" I ask him with a hopeful smile. He purses his lips and his eyebrows furrow in thought.
"Not sure, why?"
"Let's go somewhere. We can go to the bowling alley like when-"
"I don't know... I think I have to study for that test your dad's giving us next week..."
I sigh. Dad loves giving tests, especially pop quizzes. It's all people talk to me about. Can you get the answers for us? Can you talk your dad into not giving us the test till next week? Can you get your dad to abolish school? Yes, because teachers have so much power.
I am genuinely confused for a few moments. "What test?"
Then it hits me: It's only the first day of school.
"The one he's giving us next Monday," Connor lies, but a small smile cracks the surface of his hard face.
I roll my eyes. Out of all the attempts I've made at being romantic, he's going to shoot me down in a joking manner. Except I know Connor – he's not kidding.
Pushing away from him, I walk away without another word and head to my locker. There, I pull out the schedule the school had sent me over the summer and see that my first class is chemistry.
It is one of my favorites. Something about chemicals and things exploding entices me.
Before I can go to chemistry, I have to attend the pointless speech given by our principal every year on the first day. Luckily, this one is short and I'm able to get to class earlier. I wonder if Dad made it to school on time...
I find a seat near the back of the class and pull the stool out from under the black science table. A few minutes after the tardy bell rings for students to get to class, Mr. Simmons, a science teacher I've had before, begins to explain his rules and such. He's an older man that is way too easy on his students – too soft spoken to stand up to any of us.
Especially if their name is Will Dawson, a boy with some special power to get what he wants that I can never understand.
So when Will walks into the room claiming he's tardy because he "rode the bus and it was late", Mr. Simmons believes him.
The worst part about the situation is that my partner seat is empty.
And Will's eyes are fixed on it.
Ladies and gentlemen, grab some popcorn.
World War III is about to begin.
________
Hi! Thanks for reading! Was gonna wait and upload this tomorrow but hey... what's a few hours' difference?
The picture is of Natalie Hall, who I think physically represents Tori perfectly! In honor of the last words of the chapter, I chose A Love Like War by All Time Low as the song!
What are your thoughts on the chapter? I promise the most cliche parts will be over soon... I wasn't sure of a better way to express Will and Jessa's relationship.