"I'll stay by your side , silly "
I am alone . Cornered .The assembly of the wicked surrounds me . I am mocked and shunned . Abandoned . Lies and pain , inside me .
Victor.......
I feel torn and shattered , inside out .
Tears tricked from my eyes , blood making their way from me and lay on the ground , a lake of crimson , my life , draining out from me .
Is there anyone who can save me from this misery ?
So cold .
As my eyes flutter open , a women , eyes filled with worries and tears , was shaking me hardly and shouting . Who is she ? She seem oddly familiar yet the blurry image before couldn't seem to be better . The harder I tried to look properly , the blurrier the image was . I tried to force open my mouth , yet it felt heavy , My voice would not come out . It felt like thorns , thousands of them , holding it back .
"YUURI ! YURRI ! SOMEONE PLEASE HELP HIM ! Help him........My son is dying .........."the women screamed as she fell into the ground on her knees . Her angelic voice softens as her pair of hands covered her frame .
My face felt wet , as there were droplets of water falling into me , were they tears ?
Cold .
"Don't......c..ry" , I could barely speak .I am not sure if I my voice could reach her .
The women above me cried even more , pain and hurt all gathered in her brown orbs . Suddenly , I found myself inside a pair of arms . So warm that I wish I could stay there forever but it seems like an impossible dream .
My conscious was slowly slipping away from me , bit by bit . My version became blurrier until I fell into the abyss of darkness.
-Hospital
The smell of antiseptic lingered in the air blending together with the metallic smell of blood .
Screams . Cries . They masked the air with pain and grief , of losing someone which they held first before them .
Who knows how many people had cried in this place . A hundred times ? Or maybe a Thousand times ?
People were welcome to the world in this place and they also spend their last moment in the same place . All back to square one .
Yuuri's eyes fell into his eye lids and he slept peacefully with his mouth left slightly agar. His skin is as pale as white unlike usual , just like corpses .
It's frightening how he looked so peaceful in his sleep , as though he wasn't making a slightest effort to fight for his life .
The room he occupied had only one bed and curtains attached to the ceiling . The walls around him were white-washed , dull and empty , showing no sign of liveliness . A painting was hung on the wall , a young girl sitting alone on a bench under a tree filled orange and red leaves , some were scattered around the ground .......
A smile was hung on her face . She was smiling . Yet her eyes seem to be telling a different story . Perhaps , she knew that was going to die .
On his left side , was a balcony , allowing a beautiful cherry blossom to be in sight . The pink petals swayed in the air as the sun light poured into the room that looked almost dead
, it light up every nook and corners .
A pink petal landed on Yuuri's head and layed there , until a gush of wind flew , it fell into the ground again .
A doctor , dressed in white from head to toe , pushed opened the door as he carried his board using his spare hand . His eyes brows were arched downwards and he glanced at World Famous Figure Skater , Katsuki Yuri .
A frown made it's way on his face as he walked closer to examinate the unconscious male .
'You look like a lifeless vessale , broken and torn . '
"Wake up. " The doctor mumbled , his words laced with pain . He bit his lips when the room remained silent .
It was pointless after all .
He wanted to scream it through the streets that cut their gleaming paths through the city blocks , scream it at the thousand windows that punched squares of light in the night .
It has already been 3 months . It felt as long as 3 years . He had enough , if he could , he wanted to shake his best friend as hard as he could to wake him up , his heart felt like it has been ripped apart by a knife that pierced so deeply inside him . His throat had a buring sensation as it became swollen , making it harder for him to breath . He could feel tears dwelling in his eyes , about to fall .
'Shit . I'm not crying ' The man thought as he wiped the tears away with his sleeve .
He can't bare to look at Yuuri's condition , it was deteriorating day by day . It's not getting any better . Unless there's a miracle , his dear friend might just survive this . He dearest friend would be all healthy and strong again . They could laugh together and hang out in the ice rink again.
"So , hurry up , wake up . I'll wait for you , Yuuri. " After saying he turned his back to face the door , only to find a middle aged woman standing beside it , wearing an expression of emptiness .
"Aunty Hiroko ......"He bowed as he greeted .
"Hey there , kino. Is it still the same ? Yuuri's condition . " She barely asked , voice sounded like a whisper , her brown eyes looking straight into kino's emerald one . Grief lingered in her orbs as her eyes were swollen and red . Anyone can tell that she cried . It was too obvious .
"It's still the same , but ......slight worser" , He replied , he dare not to say more . It might break her heart even more .
"Oh ...I see..." Hiroko voice trailed off , she remained unfazed by what she heard , it's nothing to be surprised about . This was not the first time .
Deadly silence took over the room .
"I should leave now, " kino lied and looked at his watch before continuing , his voice was trembling , " take care , Aunty Hiroko " .
He has to get out , if he stayed any longer , he might just end up bursting out in tears.
Before Kino stepped out of the room , he heard " Kino-Kun , thanks for taking care of my son "
"No problem"
He quickly threw out the words before running ,away from her and from Yuuri.
He covered his mouth and bit his lips hard , enough to make it bleed , restraining himself from crying , the voice that needs to come out , he has to hold it back . Beads of tears streamed down his cheeks . It is unstoppable .
'Stop it already'
Hiroko sat on the chair, her gaze focused on her son's frame . She observed how his chest would rise and fall with each second passing by and how his hair would sway along by the wind's direction when it blows . She held Yuuri's hand and was not surprised by how cold it was . His hand felt as cold as the ice in the rink .
She merely said ," Yuuri , you see , mum has missed you. She missed hearing your sweet voice . She missed doing lots of things with you ......"She paused , having the urge to cry ," Why won't you wake up ? " Tears made their way from her eyes , tracing all over her face . The room remained silent that she felt like she was talking to herself . Hiroko fingers traced Yuuri's ice cold cheeks , and gently she caressed it .
Hiroko's Pov
I miss you . Stop sleeping , Yuuri . It is really time to wake up . Everyone was so worried for you . I thought to myself . He can't hear it anyway .
As I removed my hand from Yuuri , my fingers curved into a tight fist , bitterness slipped inside me . Why ? Why does my son have to suffer like this ? He has done nothing wrong ......
God , why are you treating him like this ? W-why are you so unfair ?
Out of a sudden , I was startled by the sound of my phone ringing inside my pocket . I took it out and cleared my throat before picking it up .
"Hiroko , Vicchan ......he....." It was my husband . I could hear sadness in his words . I might have an idea of what has happened . Please , anything but that
"Don't tell me Vicchan has ......? " My words trembled and quavered . My heart beat rapidly under my chest as I was shaking hard . No , it's not happening ......Even Vicchan ?
" Vicchan left ."
My phone slipped from my hand and it fell hard onto the floor . You too ? Just at this moment ?
My poor son . Just what did you do to deserve this ? Having a tumor inside you is not enough and now your dog ? I could feel my stomach twisting , the air choking me . I can't breath . Silent tears fell all over again like a river . It felt like my heart has shattered into pieces just like the fragile pieces of broken glass .
I turned over and looked at my son , he was still sound asleep .
"Yuuri....Yuuri......my son....." I kept on mumbling his name as my hand clutched on my chest . Both of them are important , don't steal them , God .
Don't leave me , Yuuri , just like Vicchan did .
Despair \di-'sper\
-To no longer have any hope or belief that a situation would improve or change
Grief \'gref\
noun
-deep sadness caused especially by someone or something's death .
Sorrow \'sär-(,)o, 'sor-\
noun
-A feeling of sadness or grief. caused especially by the loss of someone or something
Pain
-Mental or emotional suffering : sadness caused by some emotion problem
I'm hurt inside out . The feeling means for than what the dictionary explained .