Going The Distance

Going The Distance

(Hi! So this is part two of a series I'm working on. Part three (Obstacles) is still ongoing so I'm working on it! Hope you like it! )

Happy Reading! x

Prologue

So the saying is distance makes the heart grow fonder right? NOT. More like distance makes a person go insane until they can’t breathe and realize they can’t live without the person.  It wasn’t like it was the first time we were going to be away from each other. Three weeks was an awfully long time to be away from someone you love though. I honestly thought that he and I would be okay. I didn’t think he’d find another girl. He loved me. Although there were lots and lots of other girls out there that were skinnier and prettier and less crazy then I am I thought he loved me for that. It took me so long to realize I could fall and that he’d be there to catch me. I had just gotten over my insecurities. I didn’t want them to grow back. I really didn’t think that distance would do that to me. Distance was supposed to make the heart grow fonder. Not worrisome that he would cheat and I would end up broken hearted. I really didn’t think that anything would happen. Maybe I was lying to myself or something because everything had been perfect with Harry and me until now. We thought we could go the distance. We were sure we could. But then again, here I sat; crying my eyes out. Not knowing what to do with everything. I didn’t even think he knew what to do with himself. We both didn’t know what to do. We both made mistakes that hurt both of us equally. Would we make it though…? I didn’t know.

But I knew we had to try. If distance made the heart grow fonder there had to be something to salvage.

Chapter One (Charleese)

“We will be landing at London Heathrow airport in about five minutes please prepare for landing. It is currently 3 degrees Celsius and raining. Please enjoy your stay in the London area!”

Thank the lord. I hated long flights. I was glad I spent a week with my mom back home but I hated the long flight back to London. I think the only nice part was I would get to physically see Harry again. I hadn’t kissed him or touched him or anything in a week and I was secretly hoping I would be able to control myself. I wasn’t sure if he would be able to control himself. The texts that he was sending me were pretty racy and they would never ever be repeated. We both agreed it would be good for me to see my mom and though distance was supposed to make the heart grow fonder for us I don’t think it was. It made us crazy. The first night I was alone in my bed at home I wondered how I ever slept like this. Most nights Harry stayed at my apartment because Payton more or less lived at Niall’s since they were still together and going strong. And when she was at home and Louis wasn’t I would stay at Harry’s. I would fall asleep in his arms and wake up to him every morning. It was heaven.

I couldn’t wait to be back home. London was my home now. About a week before I went away Payton and I had gotten our duel citizenships for England. The boys were ecstatic. I would still have Canada as one of my homes but home for me was London. Well Payton like to say home was anywhere Harry was… I just brushed that off.  I was in love. We had been together for almost three months now. We spent Christmas with his family and I met his mum and his sister. They were so lovely. I couldn’t believe that he loved me as much as he did. Payton went back to Calgary to see her parents because she knew it would be one of the last times she took a trip there. Her parents were moving to Phoenix Arizona because it was nice and warm there so she wouldn’t really have a home in Calgary anymore.

The plane landed and my heart began to pound. I was exhausted though. At home it was 2AM in Calgary which meant only 9:00 in the morning here. All I wanted to do was sleep but I knew that wouldn’t be an option when I saw Harry. Things with us had been so perfect. The dinners, the dates, the baths… okay well those were not supposed to be mentioned so we would just stop there. But anyways we were just so good together. We never fought, I got over my insecurities and he was just my superman. He had that one thing that I needed and I had that one thing he needed. We didn’t know what it was but we knew that each of us had that one thing that we needed. I just loved him. No amount of words could describe how much I did.

I adjusted his baggy cream colored sweater that I had insisted taking with me and fixed the shoulders. It still smelt like him. It gave me a warm feeling inside. The tiffany charm bracelet that he had given me for Christmas fell down my wrist as I stood up and began walking to where I could pick up my bags and go meet Harry. I smiled and glanced at the little silver H that hung next to the heart shaped locket with a picture of him in it. It wasn’t a cheap present and I knew that but I loved it. It was like I had a part of him with me all the time.

I glanced in the mirror just before I got to baggage claim. My hair was messed up and matted, my eyes were glassy and obviously tired looking and my jeans were very wrinkled. Surprisingly I didn’t care. That was one thing that I had gotten over. I would walk to the convenience store with Harry at three in the morning in my PJ’s to go get ice cream with him. I was confident now. I knew how to carry myself now. It was a great feeling. I still was somewhat insecure. The first time I had a bath with Harry I refused to strip but he was sweet, didn’t look and waited to get in until I was well hidden under the bubbles. I refused to look at him and he laughed at that but understood why. He knew if I was going to see him nude it would be at the right moment and I was happy that he understood that. My mom had the awkward conversation with me about that but I pushed through it. Harry knew I wasn’t ready and he understood that. But as for now… that could change. I couldn’t wait to see him. Every step I took was one step closer to seeing him physically again. Sure we face timed and skyped but that wasn’t the same. I wanted him physically. And from the text I had just gotten from him he was just as nuts as I was.

My bag was nowhere to be found when I reached the baggage claim. I was ticked. Harry was nowhere to be found either. Seriously? Was this happening? There were plenty of security guards and paparazzi around though; and about 40 teenage girls so he must have been around here somewhere. I had gotten use to them too. They handled me and I was okay with them. Kailee had helped me get through the awkward phase of seeing pictures of me and Harry in the paper. Now I didn’t even care. I was okay with it.

I felt two strong hands on my waist. They lifted me off the ground and swung me around. I didn’t even have to look who it was. I could feel his curly brown hair against my face as he buried his head into the crook of my neck. He kissed my shoulder sending chills down my spine as I hugged him. I was in Harry’s arms. He set me down and put his hands on my face. His curly brown hair was messed up, his green eyes were sparking, and of course he was cheekily smiling making  his dimples show.

“Hi love. How was Canada?” he said cheerily before moving his hands down my body tell he was holding my waist.

Several girls shrieked and I blushed beet red just before the cameras began to flash. I quickly buried my face into his chest. He was wearing his Ramones t-shirt and baggy jeans and of course white converse as usual. He just looked… yummy. And I wanted to do nothing more than kiss his face off. “It was good, but I missed you.”

“I missed you too Charlie.” he breathed before he kissed my forehead and twisted his fingers through mine. He moved his head towards my ear so he could whisper. I could feel that familiar warm sweet breath on my neck and I wanted to rip his clothes off right now. Honestly. I never thought a week without him would have made me like this but I guess it did. “I really really am dying to kiss you but there are too many people around and I’m kinda scared I will never stop if I start so you mind if we wait til were somewhere more private… say your bedroom?”

My heart pounded and I nodded. From the way he was looking at me and the way I was looking at him you could tell there was something going on. I just couldn’t wait to kiss him. So badly. But I could wait… especially if it would turn into more than that. We left the airport and got into his range rover. It was pouring rain today but I could care less. All I could care about at this moment was kissing Harry.

“So your birthday is tomorrow.” He said when we were stopped at a red light a few blocks from the apartment complex. “And it’s also Valentine’s Day.”

I yawned. Yes. It was. I would be eighteen tomorrow, and he would be leaving the following morning with the boys for a three week trip around Canada and the US. I was quite sad that we would be apart but I wasn’t about to think about him leaving after I had just gotten back. “You’re tired aren’t you?” he said slightly concerned as the light turned green.

I was quite tired, but he had given me energy as soon as I saw him. “I am.” I replied before putting my hand on his knee. “What do you have planned for valentine’s day and my birthday?”

He glanced at me cheekily before glaring mischievously at the road ahead of him pulling into the parkade. “That’s one secret I will never tell.”

I rolled my eyes. “You obviously were watching the gossip girl DVD’s that my mom got me for Christmas.” I told him.

“Maybe, maybe not.” He winked before putting the vehicle in park and getting out. He opened the door for me and I hopped out. It was dark and dreary in the parkade. Not at all a place for a kiss. Harry knew that too because he simply took my hand, grabbed my bag and went to the staircase. We walked silently up the stairs and down the hallway. It wasn’t until we had reached the door that he actually started doing something.

I reached into my purse to grab my key when I felt two warm lips on my neck. He was standing right behind me and his lips were trailing up and down. He nibbled on my lip and I couldn’t even focus now. “Harry, can you wait? I want to get the door open.”

“Mhhm, you do that I’ll do this.” he mumbled before going to the other side of my neck.

Clearly there was no stopping him so I jammed the key into the lock and turned the handle. I opened the door slowly. I wished I hadn’t opened it at all. Payton and Niall were both in their underwear and lying on the kitchen counter. I saw a can of whipped cream and from what I saw I think Payton was licking it off Niall. I did not want to know what they did. Strategically placed food? Not my thing.

“Obviously we are going to my place and considering Louis is out we can have some fun of our own.” Harry said cheekily. He scooped me up into his arms and carried me flawlessly to his door where he opened it up, walked in and kicked it shut with his foot. Absolutely flawless. He set me down. Took a step back and smiled. “Welcome home love, I love you.”

I instantly dashed forward, jumped up and wrapped my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck before securing our lips together. His hands held me up as our lips moved in sync with each other. I missed him so much. His lips, his hands, his soft skin. This moment was racy and perfect. Nothing could ruin it.

“Welcome back oh…” Louis voice came as the front door opened.

“Hi there whoa… you guys wasted no time…” Liam remarked.

Harry must have been startled because before I knew what was happening I was dropped onto the floor with a loud thud. “Ow! Harry!” I protested, glaring at him and rubbing my butt. “That hurt.”

Liam and Louis started laughing as Harry stooped over to help me up. Louis looked good. Same striped shirt, same pants. Liam too. plaid shirt, jeans, same sweet boyish grin. They made me feel at home.  He shook his head and his hair went from hot to sexy in a matter of seconds. God I missed this boy. “Sorry love, not use to them uh… walking in on us.”

I rolled my eyes and gave Harry a light lingering kiss. Gosh it felt good to feel his lips on mine. I never wanted to stop kissing him. “That’s okay; I would have dropped you on your ass too.”

Harry, Louis and Liam laughed. I was back with my one liners. “Good to have you back Charlie. He was going crazy without you here.” Louis said. “He even crawled in on me one night.”

I giggled as Harry flushed and wrapped his arms around me from behind. “Thus the reason why we shouldn’t leave each other for long periods of time.”

That wasn’t gonna happen. He was going away for three weeks. We would have to be apart. As much as I didn’t want to be apart from him I knew we would have to try. “Well, we will just have to make the most of our time together then won’t we?” I said with a twinkle in my eye. Harry’s eyes met mine, those beautiful green eyes and he held me close. Liam and Louis took one look at the way Harry and I were looking at each other and dashed for the door just as Harry’s lips came down on mine. We would have to make the most of our time together because being away from each other was hard. It might even eventually tear us apart. I was so glad to be back though that any bad thought was far from any spot in my mind.

Chapter Two (Harry)

I had missed Charlie so much.  Sleeping alone at night was horrible, not being able to kiss her was horrible, not being able to tell her she was beautiful to her face was terrible and I also didn’t like not having a bath buddy. Bathing together to me was one of the most romantic things you could do with a girl. It took a bit of convincing to get her to jump in with me but she loosened up. I never saw her nude though. She never saw me either. We both agreed that it was something that would happen at the right moment. I do remember on my birthday she did get a glimpse of me. I had forgotten a towel and she was in the kitchen… or so I thought; so I walked out of the bathroom dripping wet and stark nude and she was right there. She blushed beet red and tossed the towel to me. She had said she knew I forgot and was gonna leave me one. The shower had frosted glass around it so she could have walked in and ditched the towel. I thought it was funny that she usually forgot a towel when she would use my shower. She would yell “Harry get me a towel!” I would bring her a towel and ask “want me to join you?” I could see her blush through the frosted glass of the shower and she would shake her head. Why am I thinking about this anyways? I didn’t know. Well maybe it was because all our clothes were on the bathroom floor and we were in our underwear and she was sitting on the counter and we were making out.

Honestly I could care less at the moment. I had missed her so much it was crazy. She literally made me crazy being away. The guys were ticked because I was moapy and didn’t want to do anything. All I could think about was her and how many days and hours it was until she would come home. Distance was hard for us I guess. I couldn’t bear to think about leaving her the day after tomorrow which was Valentine’s Day and her eighteenth birthday. I pushed that away from my mind though. I didn’t want to think about that now.

Things the last few months were great. We did everything together. She was so much more secure and together and knew herself better. We would go out late at night and she would be in my clothes and not even care if someone made a comment about her. Some of the time things did get to her but it wasn’t that bad anymore. Come to think of it I hadn’t seen her cry about anything like that for weeks.  She never had writers block anymore and was always in her London journal writing about something. She only had about eight pages left in it but that was okay. I had a plan to fix that anyway. I remember one day it was about three in the morning and I had woken up thinking she was fast asleep. She looked cute sleeping with her head on my chest. Only she wasn’t anywhere near me which was odd. I rolled over to see where she was and she was sitting at my desk with her iPhone propped up for light so she wouldn’t wake me. I got out of bed to find out what she was doing and when I got there she was fast asleep with her head on her notebook and pen in hand. She was just that dedicated to her writing that she got up in the middle of the night just to write. I swear she went through a pen a week when normal people wouldn’t use one up for months or even years. She was crazy, but she was mine. And I was glad I could call her that. It meant the world to me that she was mine. The guys were already making bets about us getting married but that was crazy. I had no plans to get married yet… even though it would be awesome if it was Charlie coming down the aisle to meet me. She was my princess. She was my world. She lit it up like nobody else and dare I be cheesy and say that when she flipped her hair I got overwhelmed.

My hands trailed down her back and back up. Her lips moulded to mine perfectly and her fingers were locked into my hair. This was different. Sure we did get a bit racy but this was… wow. Her long legs were wrapped around my waist and she just wouldn’t stop kissing me; until I thought that. She pulled back and smiled sweetly at me. Her hair was messed up and her eyes were glassier then they were before. She was obviously exhausted but she was trying to hide it from me. When I looked at myself I couldn’t really see much because the mirror was all fogged up. But I was smiling my cheeky grin, my hair was crazy and my lips were red. I could care less. As long as I was with Charlie I was okay.

“I think I should shower. I have sex hair even though I haven’t done anything and probably reek.” She said to me.

“Charlie love you know that is impossible.” I kissed her bare shoulder as she untangled her legs from around me and hopped off the counter. “As for the sex hair we could make that real if you want.” I grinned at her cheekily and winked.

Charlie blushed beet red. She was cute when she blushed. She wrapped her arms around her middle and sighed. “As much as I would like to do that with you I think I need to shower. I haven’t said hi to Payton and she wondered if I brought her back anything.”

I walked over to her and gave her a hug. Payton could wait. She was probably being kinky with Niall and food which had become a habit. Disgusting habit but whatever floats your boat right? Charlie’s hair smelt like her shampoo and her skin was soft as ever. She was rather pale though. Paler than usual. I assumed it was because she was exhausted though. There wasn’t much sun around anyways. “I was hoping you would have gotten a tan when you were away.”

She rolled her eyes. “Oh yea Harry. I would have totally laid outside on my deck in my bikini when it was minus forty and snowing.” She leaned her head up against my chest. She always felt so good when she was leaning up against me. Clothes or no clothes it just felt right when she was there. “You’re pretty pale to you know. But you’re my pale man and I don’t plan on sharing your paleness with anyone.”

I kissed her forehead. She was mine. I still couldn’t believe it. I told her that all the time. “I really can’t believe your mine. You and your paleness is fine with me. I whispered to her into her ear before nibbling on it like I did outside her door.

She shivered in my arms and looked up at me. “I can’t believe your mine. I’m me and I just made out with you so much we fogged up the mirror.”

I chuckled. “Last time I checked you were you and I was me… unless something changed and you became someone else and that would mean the girl I love is gone and I just made out with an imposter that happens to look incredibly hot in her underwear and….” She cut me off with her fit of giggles about my ridiculous speech and kissed me once more before shoving me to the door. I loved how I could make her laugh even if it was with my stupidity.

“Okay I get it. I am me and I am yours now can you go so I can get naked and get in the shower?”

I leaned up against the door as she tossed my clothes back at me. I smiled cheekily and raised an eyebrow. “Can I get naked with you?”

Charlie glared at me but was trying to hide her grin so it wasn’t really working. I was happy that that was the way we were with each other. We could make suggestive jokes and she would blush and take them okay. “Maybe later...” she replied before shoving me out and slamming the door. My pace quickened after she said that. I was secretly hoping it wasn’t the exhaustion that was making her more suggestive than usual. I liked it. I had just walked away with my clothes in hand when she screamed. “You gave me a hickey?! Harry Edward Styles what is wrong with you?!”

I laughed loudly before looking in the mirror across the way from me. Sure enough I had one too. Leave it to us to give each other hickeys on the first day being back together. “You gave me one too so I guess were even.” I shouted back.

“Urg!” she groaned before I heard the water in the shower start. It was so good to have her back. I was dreading the thought of leaving her.

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Once I had clothes on I went out into the living room where Payton and Niall were waiting. Niall’s hair was a disaster and Payton was rather dishevelled herself. Payton smiled when she saw me and Niall laughed.

“You got a hickey man. How hard did you to go at it when Louis and Liam bolted?” he asked me.

Louis and Liam were sitting on the chairs by the counter. They looked less mortified now. “Does she have one too?” Liam asked.

I flushed slightly and rubbed the spot on my neck where my hickey was. “She does. And hard enough that we fogged up the mirror in the bathroom.”

Niall gave me a high five and Louis and Liam nodded like they were proud. There was really nothing to be proud about. I had missed my girlfriend, hadn’t seen her or touched her in a week and she missed me to so we went at it. Totally normal. They would have done the same.

Payton kissed Niall’s cheek and smiled at me. “So I need you to keep her busy tomorrow until about three. We’re planning a party for her and we have to keep her out of the apartment.” Payton said all officially.

I nodded. I did remember that they were planning a party for her. I was hoping we could have some alone time considering that we were gonna be leaving each other soon again but maybe we would have that after her party. I didn’t leave til noon the next day but I still had to leave her. And I also wanted to give her her present alone since it was pretty personal. I had saw it when I bought part one of her birthday present and I had to buy it. It screamed her. “As long as we can spend the night together that is fine.” I replied.

“You too gonna go at it again but without clothes on?” Louis asked.

I rolled my eyes. Louis had been hinting at us sleeping together for weeks and it was kinda pissing me off. Taking a girls virginity wasn’t an easy thing to do. Especially when you cared so much for her. She was special and I wanted it to be special between us. “I don’t know. It has to be perfect with her.”

“What does?” Charlie asked from my doorway. She was in my blue button up and a pair of striped underwear that Louis and Kailee had bought her for Christmas. Her hair was wet and was making water droplets on the shirt. She didn’t seem to care though. She looked god without anything but my clothes on. She looked good in anything and I was happy she had realized that somewhat.

“Nothing. Harry is just being the sweetie he always is.” Payton said before getting up and giving Charlie a hug. “How was your trip?”

Charlie stepped back and shook her head. “Good. You’re sticky.” She remarked before walking over to me and intertwining her fingers with mine. She was paler than she was before and she yawned and leaned into my side. I could tell all she wanted to do was sleep. Niall and Payton went beet red before Payton dropped down beside him and snuggled into his side.

Liam groaned. “What was it this time? It was chocolate sauce two days ago.”

“Whipped cream.” Niall smirked.

Charlie had a look on her face that was somewhere between disgust and amusement. “Really? I didn’t know you were in to that…” she trailed off as she yawned and buried her face into my chest.

“You’d be surprised what I’ve seen Niall come over with on his neck.” Liam said.

I looked around. All of us were here except for Zayn. “Where is Zayn?” I asked.

“Where is Zayn?” Charlie asked quietly before yawning again. At this point I was more or less holding her up. She needed to sleep but she was fighting it hard.

“He is out buying your birthday present. He said he had to drive and pick it up.” Louis said. He glanced at Charlie whose eyes were now shut and smiled sweetly. “Looks like your princess needs a nap.”

“No I don’t.” Charlie said weekly. She almost fell over so I scooped her up into my arms. She weakly wrapped her arms around my neck and buried her face into my neck. Yup. She needed a nap. Come to think of it I could go for one too.

“You do Charlie. Both you and Harry look haggard. Go have a nap and we’ll see you later.” Payton said before getting up and taking Niall’s hand. They looked so cute together it wasn’t funny. Niall and her got along and were always doing something together.

“We better go get some things for tomorrow so we’ll come back later.” Liam told me before getting off his chair and walking to the door.

“I got to go meet Kailee. She wants to get something for Charlie for her birthday.” Louis announced before he too went to the door.

I could tell Charlie was sleeping. She was inhaling and exhaling deeply. I yawned just looking at her. The guys left and I walked into my bedroom and kicked the door shut. A nap was just what I needed. I was so happy to have Charlie back with me it wasn’t funny. And I never wanted to let her go again. I didn’t know what being away from her would do to us again but I didn’t want to think about that now. All that mattered was having the girl of my dreams in my arms.

Chapter Three (Charleese)

I was dead tired. When I got into the shower I really didn’t realize how tired I was until that moment. Maybe it was because I just burned off all my energy making out with Harry. I really didn’t appreciate having the hickey he gave me on the side of my neck but then again he had one too. Haters gonna hate right? The point was that we were just that happy to see each other. I was happy now that maybe we could just talk. I had so many things to tell him about being at home and all the weird encounters I had. I literally had a girl come straight to the front door of the house to see me. She freaked out when I answered the door in nothing but my underwear but it was a bad habit for me. Being around Harry constantly made that happen. We hung around in our underwear around each other and it was almost something that was natural. I really couldn’t believe this was me now. Never before had I ever been this confident. It was odd. Not that I missed being insecure but it was just different. Harry brought that out in me and I was hoping him going away wouldn’t turn me into the wreck that I was before. Payton was worried though. I knew that. When I left she told me she hoped I would be okay. I said I had my laptop and Harry and I could talk all the time and text since I had a world-wide texting plan. She was still skeptical that the old me would come back. I was hoping the new me was here to stay. Harry brought out the best in me; and I would forever owe him for that.

I fell asleep in Harry’s arms after my shower. I had walked out and I think I talked to Payton and the guys a bit. I think I hugged her but I was somewhat out of it then. I was just that exhausted. I could never sleep on planes so I guess that was what caused it. Taking the night flight back to London? Never again. When I woke up I was still in Harry’s arms. It was dark outside and I could see the moon out of Harry’s window. I felt Harry move underneath me and I slipped off him and onto the mattress of his big white bed.

“Thank god your awake I needed to pee so badly.” He announced before bounding off towards the bathroom. I had to laugh. What time was it anyways? I glanced at the clock and it was about eleven. Wait eleven? I slept for six hours? I must have been tired. Hopefully I would be able to sleep tonight. I thought it was cute that Harry didn’t want to move so I could sleep. I would thank him after he peed.

I rolled out of bed and tried to stand up. I stumbled and was about to fall into the corner of Harry’s dresser when he came out of the bathroom in PJ’s and no shirt and caught me. My head was pounding and I could feel the tiredness kick in again. I had just slept for six hours and I was still exhausted. Not a good thing. I yawned and leaned into Harry again. He smelt so good. I missed the smell of his Blu de Chanel.

“You look like death warmed over Charlie.” He said to me before leading me back over to the bed. I crawled over and slipped under the covers. He followed and I laid my head on his perfect white chest. His skin was so soft it was hard to want to sleep with a pillow. Then again who needed one when you could just sleep on this gorgeous boy?

“I feel like death warmed over.” I said to him. “You really didn’t have to lay there the whole time. If you moved me I would have minded. How long were you awake for anyway?” I really hadn’t considered how long he would have laid there so I kinda wanted to know.

He pulled the duvet up around us and hit the button on the remote to turn on the fireplace. I didn’t know why until I noticed I was shivering slightly. He kissed my forehead and smiled. “Only about three hours.” He replied. “Did you know that you smile when you sleep?”

I couldn’t believe it. He stayed with me for three hours? “Why didn’t you get up?” I asked him. “Like I said I was so out of it you could have had a party and I wouldn’t have noticed.”

I yawned and started tracing lines on Harry’s chest. It was something I did every night when I wanted to get to sleep. “I didn’t want to move because I felt like the distance would kill me. I missed you so much you have no idea.”

I blushed and kissed his chin. “I missed you too.” I had no energy to make myself move to kiss his lips and he noticed so he maneuvered so I could. I could never understand how he could care so much for me. I really didn’t understand still what he saw in me. I never told him that though. He was always so happy with me around and I didn’t want to let that go. I yawned again before shutting my eyes lightly. We laid there, just silently. I listened to his heart and his breathing and every so often he would lean his lips down and kiss mine slightly or say “I love you.”  I liked that we could do that. Just be normal and not say anything. At this moment I couldn’t bear to think about him leaving. It made my heart hurt. I couldn’t imagine life without him now. I was hoping he was here to stay. The clock red 11:55 and I decided that maybe I should sleep. I would be eighteen in five minutes but I could care less. I loved where I was and I didn’t want the moment to change. It was flawless, just like the persons arms that I was drifting off to sleep in.

Chapter Four (Harry)

She was still fast asleep when I woke up in the morning. It was about 9:30 and her face was buried in my chest. Charlie was breathing lightly and smiling to herself. It was quite cute. I wanted nothing more than to wake her up to wish her a happy birthday but she looked so flawless right now I couldn’t bear to. I had watched her sleep for three hours yesterday and neglected to go pee til she was awake so maybe I should wake her up because her birthday couldn’t start until she was awake to celebrate. A few seconds later the door burst open and I realized I didn’t have to wake her up.

Louis, Liam, Niall, Zayn, and Payton all burst into the room. Payton already fully dressed and carrying sliver and lilac balloons and a pile of clothes for Charlie. The guys weren’t even dresses yet. Niall looked like Payton had just yanked him out of bed and Zayn looked half asleep.

“Happy Birthday!” they all shouted loudly.

Charlie’s eyes flashed open and she sat up so abruptly she didn’t remember that she was laying on me and her knee came in contact with… well and area that does not like abrupt pressure. I flinched, my eyes went wide and I squealed in pain. I rolled over and off the bed onto the floor clutching myself down there. That hurt. A lot.

“Oh Harry, I’m sorry.” She said lightly before getting out of bed herself and watching me on the floor.  The guys were killing themselves laughing and Payton was trying to hide her grin.

“Well maybe it won’t be a happy birthday for you then…” Liam said cockily.

Charlie glared at him and flushed slightly. I stood up. The pain would go away eventually. It wasn’t that bad. It just hurt. For any guy it hurt. Charlie smiled at me and looked at her feet. “You’re all um… intact down there… I didn’t cause any permanent damage did I?”

I touched her cheek with my fingers. She looked like she was glowing this morning. Her messy bed hair, her curvy body in my wrinkled baby blue button up. She looked amazing. “Everything should still be working… should we test it out?”

Her eyes grew wide and they guys and Payton burst out laughing. I didn’t think it was possible for her to turn that red but she was almost brighter than a fire truck at this moment.  She hid her face in her hands and Payton walked over to her.

“Happy Eighteenth!” she said before giving her a hug and handing her a pile of clothes to wear. “You’re in Harry’s care until three this afternoon okay. Please try not to render him infertile.” She told her.

Charlie grabbed the pile of clothes and bit her lip. “Okay.” She said nervously. “Why am I in Harry’s care?”

The guys all went silent and Louis was the one to speak up. The party was supposed to be a surprise so we had to lie. “Well we do leave tomorrow so you and Harry need to uh… have some alone time… maybe you can see if it’s working.”

Charlie’s grin faded. That was all she needed to be reminded was that we were leaving tomorrow. I didn’t want to remind her. She didn’t need that. I didn’t need that. I didn’t want to know that. I wanted to forget about leaving her because it would crush her completely. She smiled though after a moment and grinned mischievously at me. “Maybe we can find out if I damaged anything getting out of bed.”

The guys all hooted and Payton nodded at Charlie. They walked to the door after all the guys gave her a hug and said happy birthday.

“We’ll see you at three.” Niall said. “Don’t have too much naked fun… save some for tonight!”

Charlie waved as the left the room and shut the door. She then turned to me and grinned nicely. Her blue eyes were sparking and her blush failed to leave her face. I secretly hoped it didn’t. She was so pretty this morning with her makeup less face and messy blonde hair. She use to hate me seeing her without make up but now she didn’t mind at all. I was glad she was confident around me.

“Happy birthday love.” I said to her.

She walked forward and put her hands on my chest and leaned up to kiss me. Her hands were freezing. She had cold hands a lot. Poor circulation I think she said. Her lips were warm and soft when the brushed against mine. When she pulled back she had an odd look on her face. It was… seductive. Something that Charlie never did. I did it but that was because that was me.  On her though it killed my sperm. She always said when she saw me shirtless it killed her ovaries and that I pretty much owned them now. Well as of this moment she owned my sperm and my manhood. It was all hers.

“You’re thinking that I just killed your sperm right?” she smirked before unbuttoning her button up slowly reveling her matching striped bra that Louis and Kailee bought her for Christmas.

I nodded as she dropped her button up to the floor. She walked to the door and out of the room. I heard the fridge door open and shut and she returned with a can of whipped cream in hand. She squirted some into her mouth and swallowed. I wanted to choke. Since when was Charlie like this? I mean… like… what? I couldn’t even form sentences anymore. At this point I could care less though. And I was not complaining. I was leaving tomorrow. She must have thought today needed to be special.

“What are you doing?” I asked her before walking up to her. She suddenly got nervous when I was standing right above her. I did her a favor though and grabbed the whipped cream from her hand and squirted some into my mouth and swallowed. “What exactly did you have in mind with this?”

She flushed again and bit her lip. “I don’t know now. I think you just killed my ovaries again.”

I laughed and pulled her close so I could kiss her. It was her birthday. I was leaving tomorrow. She was obviously trying to distract herself with something. So if it was a distraction she needed. It was a distraction she was going to get.

Chapter Five (Charleese)

“The can is empty.” Harry said just as he passed me back the empty can of whipped cream. I thought him and I could take a page out of Payton and Niall’s book but that didn’t happen. We had burst out laughing after he pinned me under him with the can of whipped cream. He had laughed and shot some into my mouth. I almost choked because I was laughing and it was just silly from that point on. So we just fed each other whipped cream instead of being kinky and getting sticky. To tell you the truth I was just trying to distract myself from the fact that he was leaving in… less than twenty four hours as of now and I didn’t know if I could take it. I tried to push the thought to the back of my mind but every time I saw a clock or a calendar it was a reminder. Harry and I were lying in his bed. I hadn’t bothered to get dressed because that would mean he would have to get dressed and I would have to move from the state of bliss I was in. He traced small circles on my back and fiddled with my bra strap that was falling off my shoulder. “What was your plan with the whipped cream anyways love?” he asked after another moment of silence.

I propped myself up on my elbow so I could see him to say what I needed to say. Might as well tell him what I was thinking about. “Well at first I was going to seduce you but then you killed my ovaries by eating the whipped cream like that and in all honesty…” I paused for a moment as he brushed my hair from my face that was falling like a curtain around us. “I was trying to distract myself from the fact that you are…” my voice broke slightly and I swallowed. “Leaving tomorrow.”

His eyes were blank for a moment as he searched for the right words. “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t trying to distract myself too.” he said simply.

We both didn’t want to leave each other. I didn’t want to leave this bed and get dressed let alone have him leave the country for three weeks. I knew there whole schedule and he said I could fly out anytime I wanted but I knew that would be stupid. They would be in Canada for a week and a half, New York for half a week and then stay in the LA area for another week and a half. I knew every flight time and every stop on their trip. Mind you Harry and printed out the itinerary and hung it on the fridge so he himself wouldn’t forget. The more I thought about it I knew I shouldn’t be thinking about it at the moment. It was my birthday! It was Valentine’s Day too! I shouldn’t be moping around and dwelling on what is going to happen, I should have fun. At least for a while anyways. I shook the thought of that from my mind and smirked at Harry.

“Where is my Valentine’s Day gift? You didn’t forget did you?” I asked him.

“Oh.” That seemed to have distracted him for a moment because he slipped out from under me and walked to the door. He smiled cheekily before slipping out the door. I leaned forward for a moment to try to see what he was doing but he poked his head through the door and gave me a dimple filled smile. “Stay here, close your eyes okay?”

I smirked at him and cocked my head to the side. What was he doing? “What are you doing?”

He was out the door and I could hear him yelling from the kitchen. “Shut your eyes or I am not coming back in.” he yelled. I could hear stuff being rifled through in the fridge and a few cabinets opening and closing again. I really didn’t know what he was doing. “Are your eyes shut?”

I giggled and shut my eyes. This should be interesting. “Yes!” I yelled back.

I heard footsteps and a thud. Harry cursed loudly before I could hear his bare feet transfer from the tile to the carpet of his bedroom. “Don’t open them yet okay?” he told me.

I couldn’t get the smile off of my face. I wanted to know what he was doing. I was dying to know. I didn’t feel him sit on the bed again and I had no clue what he was doing but curiosity was getting the best of me. I couldn’t think of anything else than what he was doing. But then again that was a good thing. “Can I open my eyes?” I asked him, giggling again.

“Open them.” He said.

When I did I wanted to cry. Harry was holding a vase of red and white long stemmed roses, a small box of my favorite Bernard Calebaux chocolates that you could only get in Canada and a small velveteen box. I think what made it even more amazing was the look on Harry’s face; His cheeky smile, messed up hair and his green eyes shimmering in the white light from the window. I hadn’t looked outside yet but I could recognize the type of light. The bright light from snow.

“Happy Valentine’s Day.” He said. “Now give me a hand with this stuff or I am going to drop the flowers.”

I lept off the bed and took the flowers from Harry’s hand and the box of chocolate and set them on the bedside table. The only thing left in his hand was the little velveteen box. I kissed him hurriedly and bounded over to my suitcase. I had bought him a present when I was away and thought it was cute. I pulled out the little red wrapped package and handed it to him. “Happy Valentine’s Day.” I told him before he gave me a kiss.

I went to grab the little box from him but he wouldn’t hand it to me. He pulled it away as soon as I reached for it. “I’m opening yours first. Because I want you to open yours at the right moment and when you open it you have to promise not to laugh.”

I couldn’t understand why Harry would ask me not to laugh. It was in a jewellery box. How is that laughable? I nodded though and let him open his first. He on the other hand burst out laughing when he ripped the package open. I had bought him a pair of boxers with little red maple leafs all over them and had them monogramed on the edge to say “Charlie owns this manhood.” I had burst out laughing and I had thought it was the greatest thing ever because I always said he owned my ovaries.

“I love them. The statement is quite accurate.” He replied before giving me another kiss and taking my hand so we could sit on the edge of the bed. “I made mine myself you know?”

A homemade gift? Since when was Harry crafty? Well he was crafty in other ways but the actual art of crafting this I had to see. I giggled a bit and Harry looked somewhat hurt. I took his face in my hands and looked at him. “I will love it even if it is hideous. You know why? Because I love you okay?”

He smiled slowly and was trying not to blush. I was already blushing to the roots of my hair so that didn’t matter anymore. I opened the little box and gasped. There was a small little string bracelet in there. It was purple and white and was intricately woven together. I took it out and looked at it closely. On the inside that faced the wrist was some black script. I had to squint because the words were really small. Once I read it I could feel the tears form. The dripped down my face and I leaned into Harry. I couldn’t believe he had made it for me. It must have taken forever to make. It was so beautiful I couldn’t believe it. On the inside if the bracelet was written:

Always & forever – Love Harry.

Chapter Six (Charleese)

I would never take the bracelet off. I decided that. It would remain on my wrist until the day we broke up or the day I died. Whichever one I had no plans on ever taking it off. It meant the world to me. It was the most important thing I had ever gotten. Now whenever I saw my charm bracelet or this one I would know that Harry loved me. He told me all the time and I still couldn’t believe I was the girl he loved and kept in his arms every night. He meant everything to me. No words could describe it.

The party was set to start in the next hour and Harry and I still were on his bed in our underwear. He decided to play with my hair and I found myself fiddling with his chains that he always wore around his neck. I noticed something knew on one of them though. It was shiny and brand new and I had never noticed it before. I sat up slightly so that I could see what it was but he shifted away from me and got out of bed.

“I think we should get dressed love. You want to shower first? Or should we save time and just shower together?” he winked at me before grabbing his chains and fiddling with them himself.

I rolled my eyes. “Showering together won’t save time at all. You know that.” I told him with a smile before walking over to him and wrapping my arms around his slender waist. If it was one thing I loved about Harry it was how he could care less about having six pack abs and being able to bench press his body weight. To me he was as fit as he needed to be and he was perfect in every way. He was flawless. There was nothing wrong with him at all. The guys would say that running around with your manhood out was a problem but whatever floats your boat right? He didn’t really run around with it out when I was around but I think that was because he knew it would make things awkward. Nakedness was not one of my favorite things. Being in a bath was different because there were bubbles around and his bath tub was so big you could fit five people in it… no pun intended. He was always so sweet when I was in my underwear. He didn’t care that I wasn’t skinny and that I did have somewhat of a chubby stomach. He didn’t care that my thighs weren’t as fit as half the other guys on the planet. He had showed me how to be secure with myself and that I was perfect in every way. I was still somewhat insecure though. I never told him that though.

“How about you shower first then and I can sit here and look cute until you come out?” he whispered in my ear before kissing my cheek.

“You look cute all the time.” I replied before strolling off into the bathroom.

“Look who’s talking.” He yelled just as I shut the door and slipped off my underwear.

I climbed into his shower and just before I turned on the water I remembered a towel. I almost always forgot which meant calling him and having him grab me one and make a comment about how he could help me dry off. It’s not that his suggestiveness didn’t work it was just that I wasn’t ready. I did want to go there with him but at the right moment. After all he was leaving tomorrow. The thought of that made my heart sink as I shampooed my hair with my little shampoo that I kept in his shower. He was going away. For three weeks. THREE WEEKS. That was almost a month and I didn’t know if I could make it. Then I remembered that Kailee and Payton would also be missing their boyfriends. I would probably be the first to go crazy though. I didn’t want to think about that at the moment though. I pushed the thought of that from my mind and quickly put some conditioner in, rinsed it out and shut the water off. The second I stepped out and had the towel around my body Harry came in stark nude.

I shrieked slightly and turned around. My face beet red. He obviously didn’t know what to do with himself either because he reached for the nearest towel and wrapped it around his waist.

“Sorry. Habit.” He said quickly.

I tried to erase that mental image from my brain and turned around. “Can you knock next time?” I asked quickly, glancing at his facial expression which made my burst out laughing. He had a giant grin on his face but he was beet red. I had never seen him blush so much at all. It was hilarious. I walked up to him and stood on my tip toes. “You’re cute when you blush you know.” I whispered with my lips almost touching his.

He kissed me. And then kissed me again. And again and again and again. We seemed to have forgotten that we were both in towels and it was gonna get messy if it went any further. I quickly grabbed mine just as it was about to fall off and bolted to the door and slammed the door. I had thirty five minutes to get ready and after what just happened I didn’t really want to put clothes on again. EVER. That mental picture of him was forever in my mind and as much as I didn’t want it to be there I knew it was. Another one of the many incidents that would be documented and another one of those things that I hoped Payton would never find out about. She knew about a few of our other incidents but I had sworn her to secrecy. At least I thought I did. You never knew with her.

I went over to my pile of clothes to see what she had picked out for me to wear. She had picked a strapless lilac dress and black heels. Her and her heels. Did she want me to kill myself? I always ended up taking them off anyways… or Harry literally carried me home. I would last about three hours and then I would decide that I had abused my feet enough and take them off. Obviously we were staying in because it was snowing and there would be no way I would go outside in this.

I felt wet hair on my bare shoulder and smiled up at Harry. He looked like a wet dog when his hair was wet. That was okay though because I loved him. He had water dripping down his bare chest and it was getting on my dress but I could care less. He kissed my shoulder before spinning me around.

“You look wonderful.” He breathed before strolling off towards his closet and going to get dressed. Once again he just killed my ovaries and made my heart race. That boy made me crazy and I loved him for it. I was starting to think that he was the one. The one that I wanted to be with forever. He was just fantastic in every way. The thought of him leaving creeped up on me and I shook it away.

I quickly went and did my hair and makeup again and when I was done and looked at the clock I had five minutes to spare. Harry was sitting on his bed in white pants and a white jack wills polo with white converse. There was a gift bag in his hand and he set it aside and leaned back onto his elbows. “Come here.” He said in his deep voice.

I blushed and walked to the door. “Why? We have to go.”

“I never did give you your happy birthday kiss so you can have it now or later.” He said cheekily. “If you choose later you might get more than your barging for.” He added with a wink.

I strolled over and clambered on top of him and let my long straight hair drape around us. “Happy birthday love.” He breathed before giving me one of those kisses that he only gave me at certain moments. The first time was the day he told me he loved me, the second was the day I told him I loved him, the third was before I left and the last one was the moment I came back. They were those kisses that you treasured. The ones that meant something to you. When he pulled back he sat up, took the gift and my hand and pulled me off the bed.

“I love you.” I said to him before we both left for whatever it was. I assumed a party since Payton always loved planning parties. She helped me plan Harry’s birthday after all and it was amazing. I was excited for it, I really was. But to me it would also just be a reminder of the hours I had left with Harry. Then again they needed to be special ones. And special they would be.

Chapter Seven (Charleese)

“Harry I can’t see anything. I’m gonna trip in these heels…” my complaints were cut off by the lights to Payton and my apartment being flicked on and fifty people yelled “Happy Birthday!”

I was in awe. Everyone was here. Harry’s and the boys’ friends, my friends, the boys. Everyone was here. It was lovely. The room was decorated with pink, purple and blue streamers and balloons. There was a DJ booth and a sign that said DJ Malik in front of it and a table filled with at least seventy five different presents wrapped in bright colors. Not to mention the giant cake that sat on the counter to my right. It was amazing. It was even grander than Harry’s birthday party had been. My smile wouldn’t leave my face. When I looked at Harry his smile was just as big as mine. The only difference was he was smiling at me. His eyes met mine and time seemed to freeze. I was sucked into his deep green eyes and it was like we were the only two people in the room. Just like that. Him and me. That was all. He leaned down and kissed my cheek just before unlinking our fingers and weaving his way into the crowd.

Payton ran up to me and gave me a huge hug and the conversations started to start and Zayn headed over to the DJ booth. “Happy birthday Charlie!” she shrieked in my ear. She was practically glowing with happiness and it was amazing to see.

She looked great. She was in a plum colored dress with sparkly gold high heels and her hair shoulder length and straight. Her smile was just as big as Harry’s was. It was nice to see her this happy. I couldn’t believe she had done all this just for my birthday. It was amazing. “You did this? Holy cow it’s fantastic.” I told her.

She smirked. “This is nothing yet. Just you wait.” She turned away from me and waved at Zayn.

Zayn waved back before he hit a button. The lights went out it the room was illuminated by pink and blue and purple lights with white Christmas lights draped around the room and around the tables. “Let’s get this birthday started everyone with one of Charlie’s favorite songs.” Zayn said before hitting play. The sounds of Damned if I do you; damned if I don’t by All Time Low filled the room and the people started dancing.

Now I gawked at Payton. She had outdone herself this time. I gave her a big hug and then let her go do the hostess duties as there were almost fifty people I needed to talk to. I noticed that Amanda and Brittany had flown in from Ottawa and were talking to Liam. Some of Harry’s friends that I met a while ago were here and were chatting up Harry and Kailee was with Louis talking with some of my other friends that I had come to meet. I couldn’t believe this was all for me. I was so shocked and I knew this night was going to be fantastic. It was certainly gonna be a memorable and I wouldn’t put it pass Payton to stop it at nothing to make it that way.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Once again Liam knew me to well and had stopped giving me champagne after my third glass. I had only lasted about an hour in my heels and had finally just gone around barefoot. I could care less anyways. I had talked with the boys. They were all being amazing and wonderful and made this birthday great. I had danced to all my favorite songs. Harry and I sang Never Gonna Leave this Bed by Maroon 5 to each other and earned a round of applause. I had talked to pretty much everyone and I had heard happy birthday so much I was sick of it. I was trying to find Payton though. I needed to talk to her. Almost everyone that I had talked to had asked me relatively the same question; “how was the birthday sex?” I blushed and said quietly “There wasn’t any” they almost all gawked at me and then they seemed to find their way away from me. How was I supposed to reply to that? I couldn’t lie because they would go to Harry and most likely congratulate him on banging me and getting some ass. I needed my best friend at this moment. She would reassure me that waiting was the right choice right? I hoped so. I just didn’t know what to think now. It wasn’t like I didn’t want to sleep with him it was just I wanted to be sure that he’d be thereafter. It wasn’t like we hadn’t almost gotten there; considering yesterday and a few other incidents that I didn’t want to repeat it had almost happened. He was perfectly sweet about it too. He told me that when the moment was right that it would happen and he was in no rush. He was so perfect about it I just wanted to melt. It meant the world to me that he would wait for me. I had faith that he would be but part of me was scared. He was going away for three weeks. He could meet another girl and forget all about me. I tried not to think about that too much though.

Payton came over after I finally just sat down on one of the bar chairs. She propped herself up on one and took my hands in hers. She had been off being the perfect hostess and I was glad she was here to talk to me. “What’s wrong? You’re hands are freezing.” She said to me.

“Poor circulation.” I mumbled before looking at her. “People keep asking me how the birthday sex was. We didn’t have any and I feel really awkward about it.”

I was glad that she didn’t look too surprised about it. She looked okay. She just squeezed my hands and sighed. “I’ve heard.” She replied. She looked like she wasn’t too impressed though. Obviously she wasn’t going to reassure me.

I slipped off the chair. “You obviously don’t understand how I feel right now.” I said curtly. I tried to pull away but she held my hands tight. I felt horrible now. Everyone was making me feel bad about it. So what if I was an eighteen year old virgin? It wasn’t that bad was it?

“Wait.” She said. “I get it okay? I do.”

I stopped. What? She got it? How could she get it? She and Niall obviously slept together months ago. “What do you mean?”

“Niall and I only slept together for the first time three days ago.” She burst before I slipped back onto the chair.

Now it was my turn to gawk. I couldn’t believe that. “You and Niall?” said dumbfounded. “No way.”

She smiled and when her brown eyes met mine. She was telling the truth. “If you hadn’t told me about everything you and Harry did together I wouldn’t believe you either. It just happened. You were gone. Harry wasn’t around and that meant now embarrassing interruptions.” She stopped. Her cheeks had flushed just by thinking about it. “You had made the right choice though. Niall and I waited too and well…” she paused again. “It was worth it.”

I nodded. I knew she was right by the way her eyes twinkled in the light. She was right. The longer we waited the better it would be. And I was hoping she was right. She was almost right about everything. “Thank you Payton. I missed you. And thank you for this party. It’s amazing.” I told her before she gave me a hug. I needed her. She was always there for me whenever I couldn’t talk to Harry about something. I loved her. She was like my sister and she knew it too. I honestly knew I couldn’t live without her.

We both hopped off the stools and the regular lights came back on. “Okay everyone it’s time for the birthday girl to open some gifts… I apologize in advance for part two of mine.” Zayn said brightly.

Payton and I headed over to the couch. She sat next to me, Harry on my other side. It was the first time I had seen him in a while actually. He gave me a quick kiss before the rest of the boys squished onto the couch. This couch was only meant for three but we somehow fit all seven of us on it.

“You’re opening me and Payton’s first. I think Harry I’ll enjoy it the most.” Niall said before he dropped a pocadotted box onto my lap with a wink. Okay now I was scared. I had a feeling I would be getting a lot of underwear.

“I swear if you all got me underwear I will not be impressed.” I told everyone. They all laughed as I ripped the ribbon off and took the lid off. “Oh my God. Seriously?” I said to Niall and Payton.  Instead of tissue paper they had covered whatever it was with about twenty different colored thongs.

“Harry those are for Charlie okay? We never want to see you like that ever again.” Niall laughed from beside Payton.

I couldn’t believe they had remembered. Harry and I were getting dressed and I had stolen his boxers because he had stolen my thong and well… slipped it on. Payton and Niall then entered my room and got more of a glimpse of Harry in it. I had sworn them to secrecy but I guess that was gonna be one of the many surprises tonight.

Harry flushed. “That was an accident!” he protested. “Although it was quite snug around the you know…”

I laughed and so did everyone else as I riffled through the thongs and pulled out a gift card to top shop, a gift set of bubble bath and then two things that made Harry and I crack up. Flavoured bath paint and a “Busy – come back later” sign.

Harry took the bath paint from me and red the label. “Coconut flavour. We will have to try this later.” He smirked with a cheeky smile. I hit his arm though. Maybe we would put it to use eventually?

I had a feeling that a lot of my gifts would involve this kind of stuff. And as I kept opening them I found out I was right. Bath paint, bubble bath, loofas, underwear, flavoured things, sponges. It just kept coming. I did get some nice things though. A Marry Me Harry sweater, some jewellery, a varsity jacket from Zayn along with something extremely sexual that Harry stuffed into the couch, a plaid shirt from Liam with matching plaid bra and underwear and lastly striped PJ’s from Louis and Kailee. That was only about the first twenty gifts. I finally had to stop though because I needed to blow out the candles and people needed to go home.

“Okay, now let’s all sing very out of tune to my lovely girlfriend.” Harry said just as all the candles were lit. The room erupted in happy birthday as the lights went down to the colored ones again. I smiled and leaned over. Harry held my hair back and whispered in my ear. “Make a wish.”

I closed my eyes and made my wish before blowing out my candles. I was hoping my wish would come true so I would never tell anyone what it was. I was waiting for Harry to let go of my hair but he didn’t. Instead he slammed my face into my cake. I couldn’t believe it. He had honestly done it. “Harry!” I shrieked wiping my eyes of the icing.

Everyone laughed. “It had to be done.” He shrugged.

I took cake from the mashed mass and hit his face with it. He grabbed me and pulled me too him and kissed me heatedly. We obviously didn’t care that there was a ton of people in the room. I was just happy to be kissing him. He had made this night so special and I really didn’t want to let him go. I realized that his hands were roaming to my zipper and Niall cleared his voice.

“Hey. We don’t want a repeat of the London eye incident.”

Harry and I both stopped. The only person that I had told was… Payton. Oh my god. She had told Niall. Harry and I both turned red as everyone looked at each other. No way. This was not happening. This birthday was so perfect and I had made memories but that one was one that was not to be repeated.

“This is one thing I would love to hear.” Liam said eagerly from the couch. I gave him a dirty look. I didn’t want him to no. I didn’t want anyone else to know.

“No.” Harry said hurriedly.

I buried my face in my hands as Payton told the story. Harry had taken me out for a date and we went on the London eye. Turns out it got stuck. We were the only ones in the compartment and well… we almost had sex up there. It was so embarrassing but as soon as it started moving Harry and I got dressed again and acted like nothing happened. I of course told Payton and swore her to secrecy… or so I thought. The room erupted in hoots and Harry and I both hid our faces. That was one of the things that we didn’t want people to know about. It was that bad.

Harry passed me a napkin so I could wipe the cake off my face. “I need a bath.” I said to him as the people seemed to drift towards the door after that one. There wasn’t much left to do for this party. It was about ten o’clock and since people knew the boys were leaving they knew they needed to sleep. Great.  I just remembered that too. I really didn’t need to remember that now but it came into my thoughts. Harry noticed and spoke up.

“Thank you all for coming. I think Charlie and I have some celebrating of our own to do.”

“Birthday sex!” Louis yelled while helping Kailee with her coat.

I rolled my eyes and looked at my hands. Louis would say that. Payton smiled and went to lead the rest of the people out. I was glad she didn’t make a comment. But then again I knew that this had been my best birthday. It was the most meaningful one. Once everyone was out the door and only the Payton and Niall were left I kissed Harry full on the mouth. I gave him one of those kisses that meant the world to me. The ones that made me never want to leave his arms or to never have him stop kissing me. He returned with so much enthusiasm that he lifted me right off my feet. My face was sticky but I didn’t care. I really didn’t care about anything. He was leaving in fourteen hours. The time seemed to tick down every second and they meant the most to me.

“Can you to stop and maybe put your sign to good use?” Niall burst in.

Harry set me down and touched his face. “You need a bath. You’re all sticky.”

I giggled. “Care to join me?” I winked.

He looked taken aback for a moment. He knew I wasn’t serious though and kissed me once more. “As much as I would love to join you I need a favor from Payton and Niall.”

I looked at him confused. A favor? What kind of favor would he need from them? I shook it off and walked to my bedroom and into the bathroom. These last few hours were amazing. I looked pretty rundown but I was also overjoyed. Tonight had been so much more than a party celebrating the anniversary of my birth. It had been a night that I made memories in. A night that made things come into perspective. It had also distracted me from the fact that in fourteen hours – I would be all alone and Harry-less.

Chapter Eight (Harry)

Once I heard her bathroom door close and the water start to run I knew I was safe to talk to Niall and Payton alone. I needed them to stay at Niall’s for the night so that Charlie and I could have a relaxing night alone without anyone around. Not so we could have sex but so that her and I could just be together and alone. I was pretty sure everyone had asked me how the birthday sex was and it was kind of annoying. If it was another thing I loved about Charlie it was because she and I could just be together. We didn’t have to kiss or touch or hug or all the relationship stuff all the time. We could just be together without a problem and I loved that. I wanted to just talk to her. I hadn’t heard much about her week with her mom or how she was doing. I also wanted to give her birthday present to her in private. There were three parts; the first part I had went out and got it for her when she was away and it was perfect.  I knew it was because it was personal and would fix her paper problem. Then there was the second part which was more for comic relief and finally the third part which would bring on the tears. All the boys had seen it and they couldn’t believe I had bought it for her and once the shock wore off about the price they knew it was the perfect thing for her. I had one too but I hid mine. She had almost found it this morning but I was happy she didn’t. It was expensive but I could care less. I couldn’t wait to see her face when she opened it. She would most likely cry but that would be okay because they’d be happy tears.

I myself was somewhat upset that I was leaving tomorrow. I’d have to be away from her for almost a month. I had offered to fly her out and she could be with us but she said that was ridiculous and she needed to work. She had gotten a job at Calvin Klein underwear in Chelsea and it paid pretty well. I really did think they paid her more just because she was connected to me but I wouldn’t tell her that. She joked about the employee discount and how she could buy amazing looking underwear for herself at a discounted price.

Niall had offered to fly out Payton as well but she said that she wouldn’t have a problem being away from him. She too had started working and worked at a pastry shop down the way. She would come home covered in flour and I would make some kinky comment and Charlie would get mad at me and then Niall would be all suggestive too. It all made for an amazing friendship between all of us. So I was hoping they wouldn’t mind leaving Charlie and I alone for tonight.

“Soooo.” Niall said from the kitchen bar stool where he was eating Charlie’s mashed cake with his fingers along with Payton.  “You want Payton to stay with me tonight so you can be with Charlie?”

Well that was easy. I didn’t even have to ask. “Yes. Just so we can be alone and with each other and make the last few hours together memorable.”

“Sleep with her and I will render you infertile. She’s not ready for that and almost went crazy with everyone asking how the birthday sex was.” Payton said warningly. Her eyebrows were raised and she was looking my straight in my eyes. I never really noticed how chocolate brown her eyes were. I could tell why Niall liked her so much.

I smiled. “I have no plans to get in her pants tonight. Although it sounds like a good idea I don’t want to do it and leave her the next morning. It’s not right.”

Niall gawked at me. I thought his mouth was going to “Seriously? How long has it been since you’ve been laid? Like… six months? I am proud of you but honestly that’s a long time without any…” Niall never got the opportunity to finish his sentence because Payton kicked him in the shin. Hard. “Ow… okay… erm… good on you not robbing a girl of her virginity?” that was clearly not the right thing to say because Payton kicked him again.

It was somewhat a surprise for everyone that I hadn’t slept with anyone for six months. I hadn’t been with anyone for two months prior to meeting Charlie. Then I met Charlie and we’d been together for four months now so yup. Six months without sex. I personally thought that was a record. The last person I had slept with was actually Scarlett. Yuck. I honestly wished that could change but I could wait as long as Charlie needed. She just meant that much to me.

Payton’s voice broke me out of thought. “You “robbed” me of mine so you can’t talk.” she said with a glare as Niall grabbed his probably now purple shin.

“But you seduced me with that little black th….” Niall had started to retaliate but when he saw Payton’s huge blush he stopped.

That was a little too much information for me but the way they were acting with each other was quite funny. They were so cute together. They fit together perfectly so to speak. They were each other’s other halves.  I simply smiled and shook my head at them before I walked over and grabbed the gift bag with two out of the three presents in it. The third part was still hidden on me and I would give it to her after she opened the other two.

“Hey Harry?” Payton said from Niall’s lap just before I walked into Charlie’s room. I turned and looked at her. She got off his lap and took a few steps towards me. “Thanks for being so good to her. I haven’t seen her this happy in a long time and I’m glad you’ve been there for her. Just do me a favor and while you’re away keep her in your mind? Because you’ll be on hers twenty four seven.”

I smiled brightly at that. “She won’t leave it for a second Payton. She’ll be right there all the time, in my thoughts and in my dreams.”

“Good.” Payton said simply. “Niall lets go. I think we need to celebrate valentines properly now with that chocolate whipped cream you bought me.”

I chuckled at her comment and shook my head. Niall was grinning brighter than ever. Obviously someone was getting laid tonight. Good thing they were not here tonight because I did not want to have to hear what they were gonna be doing. They nodded and I watched them walk to the door and get their coats on. They waved and once the door was shut I knew I could go see Charlie now. There was no way she was going to leave my brain. I loved her too much. She was my everything. She would never be replaced by anyone. I would miss her a lot but she that’s what Facetime and Skype were for. It wouldn’t be the same but it would have to do.

When I walked into her bedroom I noticed she had ditched her clothes in a pile on the floor.  I quickly put them in the laundry basket and knocked on her bathroom door. I knew better than to barge in on her considering what happened earlier today.

“The door’s open Harry.” she said sweetly before I walked in.

Her bathroom was a bit smaller than mine with a corner tub and a shower. Her shower didn’t have frosted glass so when I stayed at her place she made sure that I always had a towel to prevent any accidently naked viewing sessions. Her hair was up in a messy bun and she was surrounded by fluffy purple bubbles. The bathroom was all fogged up and her blue eyes were sparkling brightly. She looked flawless.

“I’m almost ready to get out…” she trailed off when she saw the gift bag in my hand. “I didn’t open yours at the party! I wanted to!” she protested before grabbing her towel.

I turned around so she could get out and put a towel around herself. “It’s fine. I wanted you to open it when we were alone anyways. By the way you look nice underneath bubbles. Very seductive.”

She giggled before pulling the plug on the bathtub and walking around to face me. She had little water droplets on her shoulders and her cheeks were rosy. “I asked you if you wanted to join me but you decided to talk to Payton and Niall instead.” She kissed my cheek before walking into her bedroom.  “Stay there I need to get some undergarments on.” She shouted. I heard some rustling and her dresser opening and closing before she shouted that I could come back in.

She was in her Calvin Klein pink bra and underwear with her bathrobe and bunny slippers. The same things she wore when we decided to try the “just friends” thing at three in the morning. It was one of those things that I cherished. “Okay Harry, what did you get me for my birthday?” she asked me with a smile.

I walked over and sat beside her. “Who said I bought you anything?” I joked before sighing and handing her the gift bag. ‘There numbered so you know which ones to open first.”

Her eyes lit up and she ripped away all the tissue paper and pulled out the one wrapped in silver paper and white ribbon with a number one on it. She tore into it and literally screamed when she saw it. “Oh my gosh Harry. It’s beautiful!” It was a simple vintage leather bound journal with “book of me and you” embossed into it. It had about 500 pages of paper in it and I even bought her the matching pen which was tucked inside it. She grinned at me and kissed me feverishly. “I love you Harry Styles. So much!” She breathed before diving into the bag again.

“Number two is comic relief.”  I told her before she grabbed the one wrapped in purple paper and black ribbon.

She tore into it and when she opened it she burst out laughing. I had bought her navy and pink striped Jack Wills underwear; bra, thong, boy shorts and socks included. A fluffy white towel and a thing of bubble bath that smelt like coconut. “Why only one towel Harry?” she raised her eyebrows before her phone ran on her vanity and she got up to get it. “I’m not done with you yet. I need to thank you properly.” She added with a wink.

She started talking into her phone and it was her mom talking. I played with the chain around my neck. I had one thing to give her. Just one more.  The one that would most likely make her ball her eyes out. I just knew it would mean that much to her. Her face was bright and she was smiling but that changed suddenly. “Yes mom. He’s leaving tomorrow.”

My heart sank. The thought about that had crept back up on me. I hadn’t packed a thing yet. Hopefully the guys would get the picture and pack for me. Otherwise I’d be scrambling in the morning. I really didn’t want to be Charlie-less in a few hours. But distance was said to make the heart go fonder. I wasn’t sure if that was the case for us. I was worried about leaving her here. She had told me a lot about work and how a lot of the guys had been hitting on her lately. I didn’t want anyone to take her away from me. She meant everything to me. Her eyes met mine again and she smiled slightly.

“Thanks mom. I’ll talk to you soon okay.” She said before she hung up and walked over to me. “Just my mom wishing me a happy birthday.” She said quietly. Her bright eyes had disappeared somewhat and she moved her gifts off the bed and placed them on her ottoman nearby. I moved back onto her bed and she laid down on top of me and stared up at me. She looked like she was about to cry. “You leave soon.” She breathed, her voice breaking slightly.

I pushed her hair back. “Let’s not think about that now love. Let’s just be here together.” I kissed her forehead as she rested her head on my chest right where my heart was. I just wanted to be with her. Just breathing and holding each other and listening to her heart. I couldn’t imagine a better moment than this. It was perfect. One of those moments that I would cherish and dream about while I was away.

“Thank you for my birthday gifts. I love them.” She whispered. “And I can’t wait to use that towel you gave me. It looks quite soft.”

“It reminded me of how soft your skin is.” I told her making her flush and smile. “And I can’t wait to use the bubble bath… should be fun with the body paint that Niall and Payton gave us.”

She chucked and shut her eyes. “I love you Harry.”

Her breathing slowed as she curled on top of me. “I love you too Charlie.” I breathed. I kissed her lightly and we just lay there together. She was obviously exhausted and I watched her chest go up and down lightly. I stared at the celling. This time tomorrow I would be in a bed alone, without her breathing, without her near me, with a giant cockblock known as the Atlantic Ocean between us. I was dreading it. And she obviously was too but what could you do right? One thing for sure wouldn’t change while I was away though. I would remain head over heels in love with her.

Chapter Nine (Charleese)

I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t think. I couldn’t breathe. It was five thirty in the morning and I think I slept for a grand total of fifteen minutes. Harry lay beside me in his boxers, breathing evenly with a small grin on his face. His curly mess that he called hair flopped into his face and every time he breathed it moved. I just laid there in my underwear and bathrobe and watched him sleep. I had been doing that since about one thirty in the morning when I decided that I wouldn’t be getting any more sleep. I couldn’t do anything. Every second, every minute and every hour meant he was one more measure of time from leaving me. I couldn’t really understand why I was so worried. When I went to visit my mom I had no problem. I told myself that he was waiting for me when I got back and would welcome me with open arms. Now when I thought about him leaving it just made my heart hurt.

He was going to be amongst way prettier, skinnier, sweeter, nicer and easier girls than I was. He was most likely gonna meet some girl who was totally more fabulous than me, dump me, and then go for her. I could see it now; walking down the street to Tim Horton’s he would meet some pretty most likely blonde, skinny, outrageously pretty blonde girl and forget about me. It was just going to happen that way.  I would be here, all alone, working my ass off at Calvin Klein underwear and he would be sleeping around with all these pretty girls. I knew I was just torturing myself with these thoughts but I could see it happening.

His gifts meant the world to me. The bracelet, the notebook, and even the underwear. I would make sure I didn’t wear the thong around him though because there was a ninety-nine percent chance that it would end up on the floor two minutes after he saw me in it. I didn’t want him to go. I wanted him to stay here, with me in his arms and never leave. When I left did he think the same thing? I really didn’t remember what happened. Oh yes I did. And it was very memorable.

____________________________________________________________________________________

“I’ll miss your cookies more than I’ll miss you.” Niall said just before I got into the cab.

“Of course you will. I’ll miss your irishness.” I told him before giving him a hug and turning to Liam. I had already said goodbye to the other guys and Payton and Liam, Niall, and Harry were the last ones because they had walked me out of the building to the cab.

Niall chuckled. “I’ll take care of Payton for you. She’s gonna miss you.”

I nodded and bit my lip before Liam hugged me. Harry was standing just behind Liam, his face was paler than usual and he looked like he hadn’t slept in days. His hair was a rat’s nest and his normally bright green eyes were dull. He himself looked broken.

“No champagne while you’re away because I’m not there to give you ginger ale instead.” Liam said to me, giving me a big hug and a kiss on the cheek. “Bring me back a girlfriend.”

I rolled my eyes. “I don’t think I can fit a girl into my suitcase. But I will try to squeeze one in there.” I winked at him before he pulled back and he and Niall started to back away and Harry stepped forward.

“Have a good trip.” Liam said at some point. I couldn’t remember when exactly he said that but he did. All I did remember from that moment was Harry’s eyes meeting mine. They shimmered in the minimal light and he had goose bumps on his arms from the cool air because he was only in a t-shirt and jeans.

“We better say bye, I don’t want you being sick when I’m away and I don’t want to come home and have to play doctor for you.” I said to him before putting my hands on his face.

He put his hands on mine and tried to smile. “I love you Charleese.” He breathed. Saying my full name made me shiver. He never really used it. “And maybe I will get sick just so we can play doctor.” He smirked.

That was classic Harry. He smiled cheekily before he leaned down and kissed me. It wasn’t a light kiss either. It was heated, full of passion, made me week in the knees and made me not want to go at all. I had intertwined my fingers into his hair and his arms wrapped around my waist and drew us closer together. We were hard core snogging as he would say right outside by a cabbie. We probably wouldn’t have stopped if it wasn’t for Payton, Niall, Liam, Louis, and Zayn all walking out onto the balcony to yell at him.

“She’s gonna miss her flight if you don’t get your tongue out of her throat sometime soon.” Louis yelled from the balcony.

Harry pulled back and he smiled at me. He didn’t want to let me go and I didn’t want to let him go either. Louis comment made us smile but only for a second. “I’m gonna miss you.”

I smiled and bit my lip, I was holding back tears and so was he. His looked like they were about to spill over. “I’ll miss you too.”

He kissed me one more time before I hopped into the cab. “I love you.” He said.

Just as a tear dropped down my cheek I rolled down my window and yelled out of it. “I love you too Harry. I love you too.”

______________________________________________________________________________

I shook myself from the memory and got out of bed. There was no point in watching him sleep anymore and I was quite hungry. The more I thought about his goodbye the more I understood about how he must have felt when I left. Was he just as crazy as I was? Must have been, seemed like it anyway. I padded off to the kitchen. It was snowing still and I had the sudden urge to go outside on the balcony with a cup of Cup of Soup. I had brought some packages of it home and was actually dying to have some. I boiled the water, poured the contents of the package into the mug and grabbed a spoon. I slipped my bunny slippers on before opening the balcony door and going out.

The air was cold. Minus six or seven according to the thermostat in the kitchen. I could care less. The snow was falling quickly and it was big white flakes. It was somehow comforting now. Quite, cold and crisp. I simply sipped my soup and stared out at the snow. It made me remember all the good times Harry and I had. The sweet dates, the trips to the ice-cream shop, Starbucks, Jack Wills, the time we spent so long in the bath that all the bubbles were gone and I had yelled at him for forgetting a towel for him. The time we were at the club and some guy dumped some fruity colored drink on my dress and he punched him in the face. The guy then punched him in the face and Harry had a black eye for a week. I just sat there remembering all the times we had together and how much they meant to me.

The balcony door opened and Harry stepped out in his underwear and shoes with a blanket in hand. He looked tired and yawned but lowered himself into the chair next to me and wrapped the blanked around himself. He smiled at me and I smiled back. His dimples were always the most visible in the morning when he smiled and his eyes seemed to brighten when he met mine. I was comforting, although he would most likely freeze out here.

“What are you doing?” he asked me, motioning to my cup of soup.

I blushed and took another sip of it. “Eating soup in the snow.” I replied simply. The hair on his legs was starting to stand up on end and I could see his hands begin to turn red. He wasn’t as use to the cold as I was. Waiting outside for the bus almost every day for three years of high school did that to you.

“Why?” he asked.

I shrugged. Maybe it was because soup was comforting and he wouldn’t be there to comfort me so I would get use to soup? No that would be silly. “I like soup.” I told him with a wink.

He chuckled and opened up the blanket revealing his perfect white chest. God he was amazing looking. I couldn’t get over it. “Well I like being warm so come here and keep me warm before I freeze my ass off or worse; my balls.”

I couldn’t understand how he could keep such a straight face when he would say stuff like that to me. I always ended up blushing my face off whenever he did and I knew I was now. I knew it was so read there was probably steam coming off it. I got off my chair and set my empty mug of soup on the little table and crawled onto his lap. He was warm and welcoming. I curled up and laid my head on his shoulder as he tucked the blanket around us. It was so comforting to be here with him. Just sitting in the cold. We would probably both get sick but I could honestly care less at the moment. I needed to treasure all the moments in his arms. I would be going three weeks without them around me so I wanted to take in every moment I could.

We talked, and kissed, and whispered and cuddled. It could have been years, months, days, millenniums; I could care less. We talked about everything. My trip to see my mom, the crazy fans that showed up at my front door. The fans that followed me into La Sensa when I bought bras. We talked about everything imaginable. How much we were going to miss each other, how much we were dreading the moment when we would have to leave from this spot. And then we got really off topic when Harry started talking about how many sperm of his had died since we had been out here.

“I think I’m gonna end up having to reproduce in the next five years with the amount of sperm I’ve lost by just sitting here with you.” He said to me before nuzzling my neck giving my shivers.

“You can’t complain. You stole my ovaries so how do you think I feel?” I joked before giving him a kiss. He had been hinting at this topic of conversation for a while but I really didn’t want to think about it, or talk about it because that meant me blushing my face off.

“We could reproduce together and we would both be off.” He winked. His suggestiveness was making me want to tear all my clothes off right here right now but I knew that wouldn’t be a good idea. The embarrassment of getting frostbite in those areas wasn’t appealing.

My face felt even hotter than it had before. “We can talk about that when you get home…” I trailed off and looked away. If I looked at him I knew I would start crying. He was gonna be leaving soon. I knew that by the way the sky had lightened.

The balcony door opened just as a little grey van pulled into the cul-de-sac outside of the building. Yup. He was going to leave soon. Louis poked his head out of the door and grinned slightly. “We have to leave in half an hour.” he said simply before shutting the door again and leaving Harry and I alone.

Harry’s eyes met mine for the first time. I could feel the tears forming in mine as the reminder of distance came into view. I was not ready for this. I did not want to let him go. No matter how long we had spent together it was not enough. Harry took my face in his hands and pressed his forehead to mine. “We are going to be okay. You are going to be okay. I will call you every day, text you every hour and think of you every second.” He whispered before leaning in and pressing his soft lips to mine. I was really hoping this was not going to be our last kiss. I never wanted him to leave me and I never wanted to have a last kiss with him. Even if it was only for three weeks.

I nodded just after he pulled back and I felt the tear fall. He lifted me up and carried me into the apartment and set me down on the floor before going off into my room to slip on some clothes that Liam handed to him. All the boys were in their along with Kailee and Payton who were all dressed and looking well… not distressed that their boyfriends were leaving for three weeks. When I looked in the mirror on the wall I looked like crap. My face was blotchy and my eyes were red and puffy. I looked like crap. I simply tightened my bath robe around me and slouched off to Payton’s awaiting arms.

“You are going to be okay.” She whispered to me just like Harry had. “I will be here, Kailee will be here and we will be okay.”  

I started to cry just as she finished her sentence. The other boys simply walked over and hugged me too. They knew I wasn’t going to take this well. I knew I wasn’t going to take this well. I thought it would break me. They all pulled back once Harry came into the room in his pinky red sweat shirt and jeans.

“We packed all your stuff for you last night after we left.” Liam told Harry. “That way you could be with Charlie.”

I was shaking slightly and trying to hold back my tears. I didn’t know what to do. I was worried, and scared and somehow still put together. I was waiting for me to simply just break but that never happened. Somehow I kept myself together, I would never understand how I was possibly this together.

“Thanks.” Harry replied before walking over to me. He took my hand in his and intertwined his fingers with mine. “I love you, and when I get back I hope you will still love me.”

I almost started laughing. That was a no brainer. I would never stop loving him. He made me feel so good about myself and even though he made me crazy I couldn’t care. I was crazy for him. I kissed him, and I knew that would be our last kiss. Just the way it felt I knew it was gonna be that way.

Harry pulled back and smiled cheekily. “Send me a picture of what those underwear I bought you look like on you. I want to be the first to see.”

I chuckled and we all started to say our goodbyes. It was hard, I laughed a bit at some of the boys’ comments and the way they said goodbye but what made it easier was the fact Harry was still right beside me. Still there with his curly hair and green eyes that made me melt. He was still here, but only for another moment. The boys all walked to the door, Harry never letting my hand out of his. Finally it was that moment. The one we were both dreading. He kissed my hand before his fingers finally let go of mine.

Chapter Ten (Charleese)

It had been one day. Exactly twenty-four hours since Harry had left. I guess I could say I was managing… if managing meant going crazy, never leaving your phone anywhere, moping and occasionally crying. Honestly this was crazy. I was beginning to go insane. It had been one FREAKIN’ day and I was already insane. The moment Harry and the boys touched down in Toronto he picked up his phone and called me. It was 2:00 in the morning here so that meant it was 9:00 at night there. He apologized because he thought I was sleeping. I told him I wasn’t. I was sitting in my room at my desk trying to write. It wasn’t working. I couldn’t think straight and I had ripped four of the remaining eight pages of my London journal out. I sat there and cried while he talked to me. I made sure I told him it was the awful connection that was making me sound like that. If he knew I was crying he would have been so upset. He told me he missed me already and that he wished he could come home right away. I had to hold back a sob. We talked until him and the boys got to the hotel and then he said he had to go to bed. He didn’t sleep at all on the plane. I told him I couldn’t sleep at all either. We both said I love you before he told me to get some shut eye. 

I did sleep somewhat. My dreams were filled with Harry. Memories and his smell. I think that was because I was sleeping in his sweater and on the side of the bed where he usually slept. I could care less. When I woke up today I realized I had to work. Payton had the day off and was going out with Kailee. They were having a girl’s day and promised to pick me up something when they were out shopping. I told them a four litre thing of tiger ice-cream. I had plans that when I got home from work I would sit there and eat it all. And there was no way I was sharing. I was going to wallow in my sorrows over ice-cream. It was not healthy at all but who wanted to do anything when you were as mopey as I was.

Work was pretty dead today. There was like three centimetres of snow and it was like the city shut down. It took three feet and minus forty to shut Calgary down and even when it was that horrible the schools were still open. Here it was like “Oh my gosh! Three centimetres and minus six! Life is over, let’s close everything and do not leave your house.” Please. It wasn’t cold at all. I thought about Harry and me yesterday. Sitting outside in our underwear and a blanket. It was cold, Harry wasn’t use to it but I found no problem.  My heart ached as I thought of the goodbye again and I bit my lip to prevent myself from crying.

I stood behind the counter at Calvin Klein underwear folding a bunch of new shipments. My co-worker Andreae was watching me from the other side of the counter. She was hanging a bunch of corsets onto hangers and had suddenly stopped. She was so pretty I couldn’t get over it.

She was brown. From Malaysia to be exact. People always asked if she was from India and spoke Indian or if she spoke brown. When people asked if she spoke brown she gave them a look like she was going to crucify them. It was truly quite funny. Once in a while just to be funny I would say “hey how do you say this in brown, since you speak It.” she would roll her eyes, give me a dirty look and then smirk. “Do you want me to kill you?” she would say before adding. “I’m kidding, imagine the clean-up.” She would then remind me that she spoke Malay and then tell me how to say whatever. It was cute. The first time she met Harry she died of laughter. She didn’t know what to think of him. He didn’t know what to think of him either. She simply told me later that she would Jennifer Hudson his hair. One of our inside jokes. She told me one day that if Jennifer Hudson sang to her they would bang. Therefor the term “Jennifer Hudson” was derived. I later added – because she had a slight thing for Zayn – that if Zayn sang to her they would bang. She blushed and agreed before she even understood what I said. Payton and I used the term too. The boys still didn’t know what it meant but we never would tell them. It was too funny to say “Payton I think you want to Jennifer Hudson your boyfriend.” Niall would get confused and I would die of laughter. She was just so pretty though. Her thick black hair hung to her shoulders and she always looked flawless in her simply black button up and ripped black jeans and black glasses. I honestly thought she was the most gorgeous brown girl I had ever met in my life.

My phone rang and Harry’s picture popped up. I went to grab it but clearly Andreae had other plans. She snatched it over the counter. It was about three in the afternoon here and I was trying to calculate the time change but I could care less at the moment so I forgot about it and grabbed for my phone.

“Why hello Harry, this is Andreae speaking, how may I help you?” she winked at me before walking into the middle of the store. There was no one in here and it looked like no one was going to show up so she flipped the closed sign and smiled. “Charlie? She’s a little preoccupied at the moment; she’s flirting with one of the customers.”

I ran towards her and tried to get my phone. She could not say that to Harry. No, acting like that was not something you did with Harry and me. “Give me my freakin’ phone Andreae. This is not funny at all!” I yelled at her, trying to reach for my phone.

“Calm down Harry! I am just kidding…” Andreae replied to whatever Harry had said into the phone. For a moment I thought she wasn’t going to say anything more and I thought that I might get to talk to Harry. She held out my phone and I almost had it when she pushed me away. “She’s actually trying on some of those corsets that you and Zayn looked at for her birthday. They look quite nice.”

I put my face into my hands. That’s all he needed. An image of my in my underwear. That wouldn’t help. It would just make me want him more and he would get horny and get ideas. She needed to shut up. “Don’t tell him that, he’ll want a picture.” I yelled at her. “Give me my phone Andreae!”

She shoved me aside again. “Once again I’m kidding, you guys are two young to be practicing the art of baby making.” She winked at me and I turned red, from both embarrassment and anger. I just wanted my damn phone back. I wanted to hear his voice, I wanted to talk to him, and I just wanted him. But when I reached for the phone again she waked away from me again.  “Awe, you miss her? How cute. Well she is going quite insane and I’m afraid she is going to murder me if I don’t give her the phone so here is your lovely girlfriend.”

When she finally gave me the phone my hands shook. “Harry?” I said into the phone.

“Hi love how are you?” he said brightly.

I wanted to melt. I had missed his voice so much. I blinked back more tears and went to sit behind the counter. “I’m fine, how are you?” I was just so happy to hear him again. It was great. I had heard him about twelve hours ago but that was too long.

“A little cold but I’m managing… what was this about wearing a corset and flirting with a customer?”

I chuckled and settled into the conversation with Harry. We just talked, and talked and talked. He told me he finally went to A&W and had onion rings (that was his breakfast) and how there was a lot of snow and how everything he was seeing in Canada was reminding him of me. I wanted to cry. I tried not to because Andreae would give me a lecture if I started crying. Then came another one of those dreaded goodbyes. The boys and he had to go do a bunch of radio interviews.

“I love you Charlie.” He breathed somewhat breathlessly into the phone. “If you wear those underwear I got you please send me a picture.”

I nodded. Of course he needed a picture of me in my underwear on his phone. That was not going to happen. All I needed was that getting around. “I love you too Harry.” I said sweetly into the phone before the line went dead.

I hated when we said goodbye. It sucked. When I checked the time I found out we had been on the phone for almost two hours. Honestly this was getting ridiculous. I tossed my phone into my bag and planned not to look at it. I didn’t want to look at it. I would end up buying a plane ticket, giving in and flying to be with him. I couldn’t do that. Then again I was finding it hard to go without him. I had trouble figuring out why though.

“I know why you’re like this.” Andreae said to me from across the counter, breaking me from the thought. She always seemed to know what was wrong with me with just one look. Then she would usually come up with something profound and try to make me feel better. It usually worked… when I was listening. I wasn’t sure if I would be able to because my attention span became the attention span of a three year old when Harry left.

“Why?” I asked her before burring my face into my hands. I needed an answer. I couldn’t live like this; waiting for a boy to call all the time, not wanting to be without him. I wanted to be normal me. The normal me that I was when I was around Harry.

She took my hand. “You think he’s not gonna love you when he comes back. You think he’s gonna find someone way more beautiful that you are which is impossible but you don’t think he’s gonna come running back to you. You don’t trust him do you?”

I stared blankly at her. I did feel like that. I did feel like Harry wouldn’t love me when he came back. I had a feeling he would meet someone better than me. Someone that would be easy and not have as many flaws and insecurities as I did. As for the trust part? “I would trust him with my life Andreae.” I told her.

She shook her head. “Not that kind of trust Charlie. You don’t believe that he will stay faithful to you. You don’t trust your relationship with him. You are worrying about him leaving you. That’s what’s making you crazy.”

I furrowed my eyebrows. I trusted him. Didn’t I? I trusted him more than I trusted anyone. I was worried that something would happen but I did trust him. I think I did anyways. “I do trust him Andreae. You’re wrong about that.”

She shook her head, her hair flying around her. “You need to trust him more. Harry loves you. You can’t mope about him not being here. He is going to come back to you. He loves you more than anything in the world. I doubt he will do anything stupid.” I turned away from her and pulled my hand away. I was not mopey. I just missed my boyfriend. I trusted him. I loved him. I was just slightly scared that he would leave me. I still trusted him fully though. Who was she to go all psychologist on me anyways? She may have answered my question but to question my trust level for Harry was way off base.

“I trust him. And I am not being mopey.” I snapped at her before slinging my bag over my shoulder and grabbing my coat. I was slightly angry at what she said. She wasn’t right? Was she? No she wasn’t. I could not question my trust for Harry. I did that before I fell in love with him and I was not about to go back to questioning it. I did that with every guy I liked previously and I always ended up hurt.

She grabbed my wrist before I could storm out the door. “Don’t worry about him okay. He’ll come back to you. Distance makes the heart grow fonder.”

I snatched my wrist away from her and stormed out the door.

___________________________________________________________________

Payton didn’t get back from being out til around seven. She was happy and glowing from a trip to the spa. And then there was me; lying on the couch in my PJ’s watching whatever was on TV and totally out of sorts. What Andreae had said to me had really gotten to me. Was I really that crazy and mopey and did I not trust Harry? I was getting so conflicted I did nothing but cry when I got home.

“Hi Charlie! How are you?” she said, hanging up her coat in the closet. “The boys had A&W this morning! I am so proud of Niall. I told him when they head to Calgary to go to Peters drive in and…” she had walked over and sat in the chair. She saw my face and stopped. “Are you crying again?”

I looked at her tearfully. She was simply looking at me with a blank face. One thing with her was her face was hardly ever expressionless. “Yeah. Have been for the last hour.” My phone beeped that it had a missed text. I didn’t even want to look at it now.

To my surprise she rolled her eyes. “Charlie you need to get over the fact that Harry left. I know you miss him but you can’t let life pass you by.”

I was kind of shocked at her words. She had nothing to worry about though. I was not letting life pass by. I wanted my boyfriend back. It was simple as that. “You don’t get it. How do I know that Harry is gonna love me when he sees me again?”

She kneeled beside me. “You need to trust him.”

Great. She and Andreae were on the same team. Saying that I didn’t trust him. Honestly she had nothing to worry about. “It’s easy for you to say! Niall is in love with you! You two sealed the deal.” I shouted at her.

She looked taken aback for a moment. Her brown eyes turned hurt and then softened momentarily. “Charlie. Sleeping with Harry wouldn’t have made a difference. But you really should trust him. And you know I’m right.” she said before getting up and going to the kitchen. “Harry loves you and maybe you should just accept the fact that he does, he’s away and that everything is going to be fine. I am here for you. And if your best friend isn’t enough then I don’t know what is. Distance is good for relationships. It lets you know how strong they are. Now if you excuse me I’m going to go Skype with Niall.” She stopped talking, went to her room and slammed her door.

The more I let her words sink in the more I felt bad. I guess I really didn’t trust him and I should have. I would never admit it to her though. I could tell by the way she slammed her door that she was mad at me for bringing her and Niall into this. I didn’t want to but I felt like I had to. She was doing okay. She was perfectly fine. She had nothing to worry about because she never had the boy problems I had. Me? I was broken and didn’t know what to do. I could practically feel the insecurities come flooding back. I could feel my old ways coming back and I didn’t want that. She and Andreae were right. I didn’t trust him. But I knew I had too.

I grabbed my phone to see what and who had texted me. It was Harry. He had sent a picture. I quickly opened it and all the boys were standing together in their underwear. They all had underwear with red maple leafs on them. Harry’s were slightly different though. Embroidered on the bottom was “Charlie owns this manhood.”

I felt a happy tear drop down my face and I quickly pulled off my PJ shirt. I was in the bra Harry had bought me. I snapped a quick picture, sent him a text and then slipped my shirt back on. I didn’t want to have to send that to him but I knew I had to. I had to trust him. It was just that simple. I was going crazy without him but maybe that could improve? Hopefully anyways.  It meant the world to me that they had all bought the boxers. They all wanted to make me feel better. I kept re-reading the text caption over and over and over again.

Missing you like crazy. Hope you enjoy this little bit of eye porn. Love you lots. Harry. xxx <3

Chapter Eleven (Harry)

I missed her. It was as simple as that. I was lying in bed, staring at the celling and I couldn’t sleep. I was going crazy. It had only been a day and I didn’t know what to do with myself. I tried to hide how I felt but it was getting hard. Especially when the boys could read my like a book. When Charlie and I weren’t texting, we were talking on the phone. When I was out doing interviews we were texting. When we were both doing nothing we were either texting or calling. And it had only been a day. I had to say it was crazy but I just missed her that much.  She meant the world to me. I couldn’t even explain how much she meant to me.

After I sent her the picture I had felt better. I knew I had to do something to make her feel like I was with her. What was better than for her to see me in my underwear? She was used to it and it was almost second nature for us to always be in our underwear around each other. I had chuckled when she sent me the picture back. It turned quite horrible thought because Louis grabbed my phone and saw it. He screamed “oh my god my dear eyes” before he dropped my phone and ran away dramatically. He didn’t think that she would send me anything but with Charlie… she could always surprise you.

It was two in the morning and I needed to sleep. We had the day off tomorrow but I just couldn’t. My bed was cold on the other side and I was starting to forget how Charlie smelt. It was killing me. I wondered what she was doing no. Sleeping? Getting up? Talking to Payton about how much she missed me? Hanging with another guy? When Andreae picked up the phone and said she was flirting with some guy I choked on my own spit. It was dreadful. I shook my head and couldn’t breathe. Charlie wouldn’t do that to me. I loved her. There was no way she would have done that to me. When I finally gotten on the phone with Charlie she reassured me that she wasn’t doing anything of the sorts. I didn’t think she would have anyway. It was shocking to hear it though. I trusted her, she trusted me. It was that simple. I had nothing to worry about. I had no plans on meeting any new girls and hanging out or anything. My heart… and my manhood belonged to Charlie.

The clock read 2:27 and I couldn’t lie there anymore. I finally rolled out of bed, slipped pants on, and my navy sweater and went to find out if anyone was still awake. Louis was sharing the room with me but he went out with Zayn to a local bar so I couldn’t really talk to him. I found my shoes and jammed my feet into them and quickly grabbed my coat. It was like minus sixteen outside and snowing so I was freezing my ass off here. I wished Charlie was there to keep me warm. I walked out into the hallway and went over to Niall’s room. He was staying alone because Zayn and Liam decided to share a room this time and when we went to Montreal we would all switch.

I knocked on the door and I heard footsteps behind it. Niall came to the door, still in his underwear, and smiled. He let me in without a word and walked back over to his laptop. He was either tweeting or talking to Payton. My bet was talking to Payton.

“It was just Harry.” he said to the screen before I walked over and sat beside him.

Payton was sitting in front of her laptop with her hair up in a ponytail and a pair of plaid PJ’s. She was smiling brightly and looked quite nice, happy and bright. If she was this happy that must have meant that Charlie was doing fine… right? “Hi Harry! How is Canada?”

I couldn’t even answer her question. “I miss Charlie.” I blurted. It just slipped out. I couldn’t say anything else. I just missed her. She wasn’t leaving my mind and it was driving me crazy.

Payton’s features softened. She almost looked sad for a moment. “She misses you too Harry. She needs you like a heart needs a beat.”

“That’s in a song by OneRepublic!” Niall yelled. He was glowing. He too missed Payton but it wasn’t as bad as I missed Charlie. I didn’t even know it was possible to miss her this much.

The words to apologize filled my head. I could hear the strings and I really wanted to listen to the song. It was one of Charlie’s favorites. Payton could tell that it reminded me of Charlie. “She will kill me if she knows I saw you over Skype, and I think she’s finally sleeping. I should probably go.”

Niall smiled at the screen. “You need to sleep love. You have bags under your eyes.”

“You both need sleep.” Payton said, glancing between Niall and I. Just seeing her made me want to see Charlie more.

I nodded. “Good to see you then. Tell Charlie I love her okay.”

Payton laughed. “You can do that yourself and she knows it. She is going quite insane without you though.”

I nodded. I was going just as insane as she was, or maybe even more I didn’t know. I just knew that I would never stop loving her no matter what or who I met. “I love her more than anything.” I whispered, fiddling with my hands.

Niall wrapped his arm around me just as a knock came on Payton’s door. Payton looked above her laptop and smiled. “Hi Charlie.” She said lightly.

My heart pounded. Will I get to see her? I was hoping I would get too. I heard some shuffling but she never did come around to see me. “I’m sorry I snapped at you. It’s just I miss him so much and I wish I told him exactly how much I love him.” Charlie said tearfully. I could tell she was crying, her voice always sounded like that when she cried.

Payton looked at the screen and then smiled at Charlie who must have been sitting down on the bed because the computer shifted. “How about you tell me what you would say. I don’t think you want Harry to see you when you’re this upset.” Payton met my eyes just before Charlie started to speak.

“I love him more than anything. I need him like a heart needs a beat and I can’t live without him. I could honestly talk for days about how much I loved him but if I could be short and sweet I would say that.” she paused, I could feel the smile growing at my lips. I didn’t need to see her now. I wanted to but that had made me feel better. Just hearing her talk like that made me know I would be okay. “And I don’t want him to see me like this. I'm only in my underwear and I look like crap. I sent him a picture though.”

I could tell Charlie wanted to have some girl time with Payton and it took all my self-control to not to say anything but that would ruin the moment. I was fine now. With just that little bit of reassurance. Niall looked at me and nodded. He knew he had to say goodbye to Payton.

“We’ll let me just shut this thing off and we can eat that ice-cream you wanted. I did buy it you know.” Payton said brightly before winking at the screen and shutting down the chat. “I love you” she mouthed just before the screen went blank.

I wanted to cry. I honestly wanted to cry. She had made me feel so much better even though I wanted to see her I could care less. I was on cloud nine. Or as Niall would say Timbit nine. We had gone to Tim Horton’s and had timbits. He said they were like clouds.

“You wanna go to Tim Horton’s?” Niall asked. I hadn’t even noticed he had gotten off the bed and put clothes on. He was standing by the door in his coat waiting. I was so distracted with thinking about what Charlie said I didn’t even know what was going on around me. It had made me feel so much better. I knew I had nothing to worry about.

I nodded and got up. “I thought you’d never ask.”

We than strolled out into the hallway and started talking about our girlfriends. I was just so happy to see her and hear her talk it wasn’t funny. It was great. I missed her but I felt like I could deal with it now. I felt like maybe it would be easier to sleep now. Hearing that she loved me without me being there was icing on the cake. I was so in love with her nothing could change that now. I didn’t think it was possible to meet anyone that was equally as amazing as she was. Who would know that I would be wrong and I would face temptation.

Chapter Twelve (Harry)

I was our last day in Toronto today. We were gonna be going off to Montreal next and that meant I had gone three days without Charlie. Only eighteen more to go. Two in Montreal, two in Calgary, then it was off to New York for four days, and then LA for the remainder of the time. I had calculated everything, time changes, long distance charges, where and when I would finally give in and buy internet to see Charlie, and how many texts I sent her a day. Let’s just say it was an excessive amount and leave it at that. She seemed to be dealing with me being away. When we talked she seemed to be less upset and less worried. She had told me she was worried about me finding someone else but I told her that she had no problem because I had no heart with me to give away. My heart was with her. She knew she had it. I had given her that thing that I bought her that I also had one of. At least I thought that until this morning.

I had been slipping on some pants this morning when it fell out of my pocket. I swore so loudly the manager of the hotel came up to see what happened. I was pissed at myself. I couldn’t believe that I had forgotten to give it to her. It was present number three that was gonna bring on the tears. I had forgotten that I hadn’t given it to her because her mom called and ruined the moment.  I had forgotten because I knew I had to leave her and the moment wasn’t right. The guys had come tearing into the room because they were all in Niall’s, using his internet. I almost wanted to cry. I had gotten her it so she would know that I would be hers when I was away. Now she didn’t have that reassurance, and I was starting to lose mine now too. I also wanted to give it to her to know that she was mine. I knew that she would wear it and never take it off. I hoped it fit too. Sure she had the bracelet that I made for Valentine’s Day but this was much more important, this one I had one of too. And I knew I would beat myself up for it.

I had tweeted her a song a moment ago. She loved the song and I had been listening on repeat since I dropped what I was supposed to give her on the ground. It was If I Only Had the Heart by The Maine. It felt the way I was feeling at the moment. I didn’t want her to forget me and I didn’t want her to forgive me for being away. I felt horrible that I hadn’t given her that reassurance that I loved her and she was mine. It hurt. The boys didn’t want me to be upset though. They were trying to make me feel better. They didn’t want me to beat myself up over everything which I was doing.

“She isn’t gonna be mad that you didn’t give it to her. She doesn’t even know about it! As for the song, it’s a good song.” Liam nodded before patting my knee.

I smiled at him. He had been enjoying all the girls that were around and had given a few of them his number. Zayn had done the same but really hadn’t seen one that knocked his socks off. I on the other hand had found the girl that knocked my socks off. And she was back in London, most likely listening to the song I just tweeted her and probably crying. Unless she didn’t get the point of why I tweeted it to her. In that case she was probably gallivanting around the apartment in either one of my sweaters that I left her or her underwear. When I started to think of sweaters I thought of Sweater Song by Hedley. I would have to remember to tweet that to her as well.

“Can we go out? I want Timmy’s again.” Niall complained from the door. He had gotten addicted to Timmy’s and had eaten that for breakfast lunch and dinner for the past three days. It was quite funny. I guess he could say the same thing about me and poutine. I had eaten it for dinner for the last three nights. It was quite lovely stuff. His blue eyes sparkled with the light from my window and I stood up. I guess I really couldn’t beat myself up over it but I would do that internally and not let the boys know that I was upset still.

“Let’s go. Maybe I’ll win on roll up the rim.”

We all filed out the door but Louis held me back. He wanted to talk so I sat on the nearest chair and focused on him. He and Kailee had been rather good lately. They had no problem with distance and things seemed to be working out for them. It was nice to see. They made each other really happy and he was like my brother so when he was happy I was happy. Louis was in a striped sweater today and pants. His hoodie ties were tied together and he crossed his arms over his chest.

“Stop worrying about Charlie and if she is still going to love you.”

His words surprised me. “I’m not.” I replied swiftly. I knew that was a lie though. I was worried about her still loving me. After all… what if she did meet someone that was not in the public eye like I was and what if she wanted a normal relationship?

Louis sat beside me and took my hand. His eyes were sincere and I knew he was right. He was always right about me. “You and her are gonna be fine. And if anything I think it’s her that will have to worry a bit.”

Once again I was surprised at his words. Why did she have to worry about me? I was head over heels in love with her. I wouldn’t leave her for all the money in the world or for anything or anyone so why would she need to worry.  “I am not going to cheat on her Louis.” I said coolly.

Louis stood up. He shook his head. I could tell that wasn’t what he wanted to say but he had meant to say something like it. “Every guy gets tempted by girls. I am just worried that you might lead someone on or they will misinterpret your niceness and something will happen and it won’t be your fault but if Charlie found out then she would think it would be. Or she would blame herself. But don’t be mad at me okay, I am not trying to worry you or scare you, I just want you to know that you need to be careful.”

Louis walked out of the room without another word and I stared at the empty doorway. That could never happen. Me? Lead someone on? Nah. I could be friends with girls. I was friends with Kailee and Payton and they didn’t seem to find my niceness leading them on. Sure I did think they were hot but that was just me being a guy. Charlie new I thought that too but if Kailee and Payton were hot then she was burning. I loved her and that wouldn’t change. I wasn’t mad at Louis for what he said but it did make me think. And who would I meet that would be competition for Charlie? I doubt I could find a girl just as amazing as her. Then again I was known for being wrong.

_____________________________________________________

I met the guys at Tim Horton’s and sat down with them. They had ordered my coffee and my chocolate chip muffin.  Charlie had texted Liam just before I got there to order me that since she loved the chocolate chip muffins. She also texted a picture of an empty four litre container of tiger ice-cream. She and Payton had eaten it the night Payton Skyped with Niall. I had laughed because they had eaten it with a fork.

“So, whose ready to get their French on?” Zayn laughed before biting into his bagel with cream cheese. His hair was down today so he looked different than usual.

“Pouvez vous encore parler français?” I said to him. I knew a bit of French and I knew that I had just said “do you even speak French” but I didn’t think he knew what I said. I simply started to eat my muffin, which tasted amazing. Leave it to Charlie to have good taste.

“I have no idea what you just said.” Zayn smirked from across before the other guys started laughing.

“He said “do you even speak French.”” A pretty girl with brown hair and pretty eyes said from nearby. She was sitting with two other girls who were also very pretty. The one that was talking to Zayn was smiling brightly and smirked. “You might want to take a dictionary or a pocket translator with you if you can’t understand the simple stuff.”

Zayn seemed to be totally taken in by this girl that he didn’t even notice he had spilt his coffee all over his pants. He was staring into her eyes and she was staring right back. He had this funny look on his face and I recognized it. It was the same look that I had when I met Charlie. “What’s your name?” Zayn blurted before finally realizing that he poured coffee on himself.

The girl got up and walked over a few steps and started to help him wipe up the coffee. “I’m Sara.” She said before those two ended up in their own little conversation about spilling coffee and Zayn’s horrible French.

Liam was also looking at the girls at the table. “What is your name?” he asked the girl who was sitting next to where Sara had gotten up from. Liam too had a goofy look on his face. The girl was quite pretty. She had black hair and I think she was half Latin. She had big pretty eyes and seemed like one of those girls that were loud once you got to know her.

“I’m Valeria.” She nodded before Liam slipped into the seat where Sara was and started chatting her up. Maybe he had found the girl that he was looking for here in Canada.

My phone vibrated in my pocket but I didn’t even notice. My eyes had fallen on the other girl. She was blonde and had a beanie on her curly hair. She was dressed simply in jeans and a ski coat and boots but that wasn’t surprised me. It was her eyes. They were piercing blue. Like ice. They just shot right thought me like a bullet from a gun. She smiled brightly and scooted over into the other chair.

“You’re Harry Styles.” She said sweetly, smiling and showing off her perfect teeth.

I had seemed to have forgotten my name. Was my name Harry? I didn’t remember. The only thing I could think about was how pretty this girl was, and how much she reminded me of Charlie. Charlie? Oh yes Charlie. The person who was most likely texting me at the moment. My girlfriend that I had momentarily forgotten about. Huh? How could I have forgotten about Charlie? I shook my head and took out my phone and unlocked it. But didn’t look at my message because I was too busy still looking at this pretty girl. I had forgotten that I had not answered her question. “Yeah, I’m the one and only. And what would your pretty name be?”

She smiled even brighter. If that was possible. “Ashley.”

My phone vibrated again. It was Charlie. She had sent another photo. It was her in my sweater, frolicking around with only her underwear on. Oh how I loved the word frolic. Her text read:

I am frolicking without you, come home soon. Love you xxx C.

When I looked back up Ashley was still smiling again. But Niall and Louis were staring. They were glaring. They knew what was going on. I knew what was going on because I had that look on my face like I did when I met Charlie and the same look Liam and Zayn had on their faces. Louis was right with what he said before. Temptation was temptation and I knew I was gonna have to fight it. There was a girl at home that was sending me cute texts and loved me and then there was this girl who well… wasn’t the one that I wanted to be with right now. But then again there was nothing wrong with making new friends was there? I hoped not. And I was hoping that friendship was all she wanted. But like I said before. I usually was wrong, and I wished I knew that I was gonna be. Because this on top of the distance between Charlie and I, would make or break us.

Chapter Thirteen (Charleese)

I had gone five days without seeing Harry’s face. I had gone five days without kissing him, touching him, hugging him and without being with him. I was dealing as best as I could but I was still somewhat worried. The boy that use to text me back a.s.a.p. no matter what it was now took anywhere from five to ten minutes or more to text me back. Yesterday when I called him he even said “let me call you back okay” before hanging up and calling me back three hours later when I was sleeping. It just wasn’t like him and I was ready to pull my hair out at the fact that this was happening. I was hoping I was overreacting about what was happening but I wasn’t sure.

A few hours ago Niall said they had met some girls in Toronto. I went on Skype with Payton hoping to see Harry but Niall said he had gone out with Zayn, Liam, and the girls instead. They were in Montreal and Niall was making food jokes with Payton about Montreal smoked meat. I didn’t find them that funny at all because I wondered what kind of girl Harry was out with. Was she pretty? Was she nice? Was she skinnier than me? Was she shorter than me? I couldn’t stop thinking about it. It was supposed to be my day off and I hadn’t heard from Harry at all. I wanted to Skype with him and see his face. I just wanted to see him in general. I wanted to see his dimples when he smiled and said I love you. I just wanted to hear his voice and see it coming out of his soft pink lips that I loved to kiss. They were the only set I had actually kissed but there would never be any comparison.

I was lying on the floor, my laptop propped up and I was in jeans and Harry’s cream colored sweater. He had left it behind for me and I never wanted to wash it. Kailee and Payton were doing laundry in the laundry room and they asked if I wanted to wash it. I refused, tossed my dirty clothes at them and remained on the floor staring at the celling. I had never noticed that out ceilings were stippled. They were high ceilings so I never stared up at them. Who was I kidding though? I was trying to distract myself. Harry was gone and I was worrying that he was out with some girl, showing her a good time, and forgetting all about me. After all who would want me for a girlfriend anyways? I wanted to give up. Obviously Harry was not about to Skype me. He had said that he would try today and it was about noon here. I didn’t even bother calculating the time change anymore. It wasn’t worth it. I was just about to stand up and go help Kailee and Payton with the laundry when I heard something that surprised me.

The familiar ringtone that Skype had when someone called was coming from my laptop. The caller ID was a picture of a boy with sparkling green eyes and floppy, messy, curly brown hair. My hands shook. Was this actually happening? Was he Skyping me? Was I actually going to see his face? I quickly pressed the accept button and watched the face come into view.

There he was. Messy curls, bright eyes, cheeky smile, and bold collarbones that stuck out when he wore his low t-shirts. He was in a navy t-shirt that I bought him a few weeks ago and baggy jeans. He smiled when I finally came into view. I couldn’t believe it was actually him. He was right there. Right in front of me. I wanted to kiss the computer screen.

“Harry?” I questioned as his eyes met mine. I could feel my eyes fill with tears as he waved and nodded. I was having trouble thinking about why I didn’t trust him before and why I was questioning his love for me. He was right there, he wouldn’t move on to some other girl.

“Hi Charlie! How’s the snow?” he said charmingly. He stared at me for a moment before starting to play with his hands. His hands were so fit.  Everything about him was fit. Honestly my mind was going one hundred miles per minute, just seeing his face made my heart speed up just like it did when he was actually with me.  “I really miss you. I wish you were here to translate the Canadian speak for me.”

I chuckled. I was overjoyed. He was right there. In his hotel room, no girls around other than me who was on the other side of his computer screen. I blinked back the tears and smiled. “How many people have you actually heard say eh?” I smiled brightly. When we first met he asked me why I didn’t say it and I explained it was an eastern thing.

“Not a lot actually, maybe it’s the area. Ashley does say it sometimes though.”

The look on his face after he said her name was indescribable. So was mine. Ashley? Who was Ashley? Was it the girl he was out with? I took a second to look at myself. My face had become paler than normal, my hands felt somewhat clammy and my smile was wiped off my face. Harry’s eyes were pleading as they met mine. “Oh.” Was all I could say. “You met a girl.”

Harry met my eyes. My heart felt like it was being pulled out of my chest. I knew it was too good to be true. I knew he would meet someone better than me. I was lying to myself to think that he would keep me on his mind the whole time. Harry’s gaze held mine and my eyes felt uncomfortably hot. “Charlie, I love you more than anything. She is just a friend of the girls that Liam and Zayn have been hanging out with. That’s all. She will never mean more to me than you ever will and I love you more than Niall loves all the Nandos’ in the world.”

I wanted to be mad at him. I wanted to think that he had found someone else. I wanted to think that I was right. But with the way he was looking at me I knew I was wrong. He saw nothing in this girl. I was the one that he wanted. He just wanted a friend. He loved me and he wanted me to know that I was his and no girl could ever replace me. It was astounding that I could tell that from the look on his face but something just spoke to me. Something said that he was saying that to me. I don’t know what it was but it was that little voice in the back of my mind. I quickly shook my head and smiled. “I love you too Harry.” I breathed before hugging myself. “I don’t know how I could ever doubt the fact that I love you and you love me.”

Harry smiled cheekily, his dimples showing and his soft pink lips framing his white teeth. I really wish I could kiss him but that was not gonna be happening because he was like a gazillion miles away. He looked over at whoever was walking towards him and laughed. Niall, Zayn, Louis, and Liam came into view and all sat behind Harry. Niall had his guitar in hand and they were all brightly smiling. “I have a surprise for you.” Harry said quickly before the boys all looked at each other.

Niall started to strum on his guitar and the guys started to hum. The tune surprised me at first and then I smiled so wide that I thought my cheek muscles would snap. Was this happening? Were they gonna sing this to me. The intro stopped and the voices began to sing. They were singing the Sweater Song by Hedley to me.

She said baby don't leave

Be home, stay close, be close to me

Boy don't be gone, boy don't be gone.

He said baby you know

I got to run I got to go

I won't be long, girl I won't be long.

She said boy don't you flirt,

And baby please just don't get hurt

And if you feel alone then here take my shirt.

He said forever girl

I know you hate the weather girl

So maybe you should hold onto my sweater girl.

I wanted to cry. It was the cutest thing that had ever happened to me. Liam sang first, then Niall, then Louis, and then Zayn. They all sang with smiles on their faces and they were all looking straight at me. The world could have ended and I wouldn’t have noticed. They were doing this for me. Harry hadn’t sung yet and I was waiting for what he was going to sing. I kept going through the lines in my head and then he started to sing.

He said you're looking great

I'm home, I'm back, I couldn't wait

Girl way too long, that was way too long.

She said get over here

I crave you close I need you near

Now play that song, boy play me our song.

He said back to forever girl

Hope you endured the weather girl

Now all I wanna do is get you outta that sweater girl.

She said I love the way you flirt

I'm so glad you didn't get hurt

Now let me see you naked without that shirt.

They kept going until the song was over and I honestly wanted to cry. I was silently crying as the boys all smiled at me and Harry grinned like a fool.

“I can’t believe you did that for me Harry. I just can’t believe it. How did you…” I couldn’t even form a sentence because my heart was so full of joy. “How did you come up with this?” my heart that yearned for him somehow felt whole. It felt like he was here with me. Like I had a weight lifted off my shoulder and I knew that I could trust him now. That maybe I would be able to move on and not mope and go crazy without him. Key word in that sentence – maybe.

Harry blushed. When he blushed you always knew it was a truthful one. “You wear my sweaters all the time and I knew you loved that song. It meant a lot to you and it really explained what we are going through. And the words imply what I am going to do to you when I see you again so be prepared to be ripped out of that sweater.” He glanced at the boys who all started to get up and leave so we would talk and most likely say goodbye.  “Charlie, I love you more than anything. Nothing will ever change that and I wanted to tell you that. Even though were miles apart know that my heart is with you and that it will remain in your pocket. That way I can’t give it away and even if I did meet someone, and they would never be as amazing as you are anyways.”

The tears dripped from my eyes. I wished I could keep this memory in my mind forever. Never had I ever heard that from someone let alone a guy that loved me even though he could have any other girl in the world. “I honestly love you more than anything too Harry. That will never change and I probably love you so much that its unhealthy but I don’t care. Just… know that my heart is in your pocket...” I trailed off and giggled. “Along with my ovaries. You stole them even before I fell in love with them so take care of them for me.”

Harry chuckled and we both said our quick goodbye because we both had to go. He waved and blew me a kiss. I blew him one too and the screen went black. I sat back with a big huge smile on my face. Harry Styles loved me. He really did. He loved me enough to sing me that song; he loved me enough to tell me his heart was with me and that he would never give it away to anyone anyways.  I was beginning to think that I had nothing to worry about. And hoping that I wouldn’t have anything to worry about. I knew that I could trust him and that he wouldn’t be the problem. I was just hoping the girl wouldn’t cause any problems. Wishful thinking? I think so. Because he had only just met this girl, who knew what could happen later on after he knew her. Distance made the heart grow fonder. I found myself repeating this quote almost all the time now. I was hoping his fondness for me would continue to grow as the time and distance became longer and father apart. Once again… hoping. Would I be able to keep my normalness now and not go insane? Once again… hopefully and maybe. Maybe things would remain this light and fluffy? Not likely. Hopefully it would be but… not likely. Something was going to go wrong. I was just waiting for it to happen. And when it would happen; who knew it would break me apart.

Chapter Fourteen (Harry)

“Come on Harry! The water is great!” Louis yelled at me from where he was swimming in the pool at the Deerfoot Inn and Casino, where we were staying for the next two days in Calgary. It felt odd being here. Especially since she was from here. I had called her the moment we got in so she could tell me her address so I could send some flowers to her mom. She sent me to a small burgundy and white house with a tree in the front and a burgundy door. I simply rang the doorbell, ditched the flowers and drove away. I did leave a small note for her mom so she knew they were from me but I didn’t want to talk to her. Charlie wanted to be there when she met me and I wanted the same. It just felt wrong being in her hometown when she was across the ocean. I was beginning to think that the Atlantic was nothing more than a giant cockblock. I wasn’t mopey all the time but I was today. I wanted nothing more than to jump on a plane, run back to her and rip all her clothes off. It was just that simple.

 “Harry, come have some fun. We all know you miss Charlie because were here but you need to loosen up!” Liam called from where he was lounging in the hot tub. He had quite the smile on his face lately and I think that was because he had developed a crush on one of the girls we had hung out with in Toronto and Montreal. He had quite the thing for Valeria. She was really pretty and made Liam quite the happy camper for the three days they had together. Then there was Zayn and Sara and they were talking on the phone right now from where he was sitting beside me. They too had been inseparable since they met in Tim Horton’s as well. I had never seen Zayn so happy with a girl. They looked cute together; they got along and almost had everything in common.

My mind started to stray as I thought about the other girl we met that day. Ashley was her name.  She was blonde, blue eyes, petite and well… pretty. I didn’t know what to think of her. I had blown off Charlie’s phone calls, texts, and tweets and spent time with her instead. Now I just felt like an asshole. I really didn’t have any feelings for Ashley. I saw her as a good friend. She reminded me of Charlie in a lot of ways. The way that she talked about things, the way that she acted around me - somewhat shy and nervous - and also in the way she looked. The only difference was that she was smaller and very sure of herself. She held herself high and it was like she knew what she wanted out of everything. I was having trouble with grasping my exact opinion of her still though. I didn’t like her, I had a girlfriend but I was still confused. We had exchanged numbers and everything and talked every once in a while but I didn’t make anything of it. I had just made another Canadian friend. But that didn’t make me feel any better about blowing off Charlie. And whenever I thought about Charlie all I thought about was my time spent with Ashley.

My phone buzzed in my pocket and I shook my confused thoughts to the side to focus on what was on my phone screen.

Thinking of you, singing the sweater song.

Come home soon, I want to kiss you.

You may just get me out of this sweater. ;)

Ps. My mom liked the flowers. Xxx C.

I smiled to myself. She was so cute. How could I ever have any thoughts about any other girl when I had her? She was the only one I wanted. I found myself fiddling with what was on my chain, the other half of which burned in my pocket. I never took it out of my pocket. The boys thought I would lose it and be even madder at myself but I felt like if I took it out I would misplace it. I wished I could give it to her right now but that wasn’t going to happen because once again, there was an ocean between us. I quickly texted her back.

Thinking of you too.

I want to do more than kiss you.

And I will get you out of that sweater

whether you like it or not. ;)

Glad she liked them.

I love you. xx <3 H.

“Dude! Can you at least smile at something else rather than just your phone and your computer screen?” Niall said to me. He was standing in front of me, dripping wet, with a towel around his shoulders. He must have just gotten out of the pool.

I smiled at him. Ever since I had left Toronto I really hadn’t smiled at much of anything. Charlie was always on my mind from that moment.  “It just feels odd to be here without her.”

Niall nodded slowly and sat in the chair next to me. “It feels odd to me too. Like I won’t get the true Calgary feeling without her being able to show me the little things that made this place home.” He stared off into the blue, chlorine scented pool. He too wasn’t smiling as often as he usually did today and it was quite worrisome. Especially considering it was Niall.

I nodded. “I feel the same way.” I thought back to when I first met Charlie and took her around to all the places that I loved to go to. I remember the smile on her face, her laugh, the way her hair smelt; everything. That was also the first day we kissed. My chest started to ache the more I thought about it. 

Niall hit my arm lightly. “We are gonna be fine Harry. If anything we will both get laid when we see them again.” He smiled before tossing his towel into my face and jumping into the pool.

I could do this. I could be without her. This distance was going to make me love her more. I knew I did every moment we were away from each other. I saw the boys in the pool, laughing, splashing each other, shooting each other with water spouts. Zayn had even hung up his phone and sat on the edge to have some fun too.  I looked at my phone again since I had received another text from Charlie.

You better not be mopey.

Go have some fun in my hometown.

I would tell you to get plastered

but I don’t think that’s a good idea

when I’m not there. ;)

I love you too. xxx

Ps. I cleaned the bathroom and found

a clump of your hair in my shower drain.

I am quite disgusted but I love you anyways. <3

I chuckled and left my phone on the table and went to change into some swimming clothes. It just took one of her texts to make me feel better. And in that case make me laugh. I found a clump of her hair in my shower drain too so she shouldn’t complain. Hers was longer and harder to pick up but I really didn’t want to think about hair and shower drains at the moment. Once I was changed and walked out all the boys yelled that I had finally decided to do something fun. My pay back? A giant cannon ball that sent water all over them.

_____________________________________________________

“So if Kailee was standing right in front of you in a striped bikini holding a bag of carrots what would you do Louis?” Liam asked Louis as we lounged around Louis and my hotel room. We had left the pool, come up here and ordered room service, and started asking each other random questions. So far they all involved random things and Liam had just changed the topic to girlfriends. I felt so much better after going for that swim with the boys. It cleared my head of all thoughts of anything else but happiness and Charlie. My thoughts consisted of what I was going to do to Charlie when I saw her again and I really didn’t want to disclose those thoughts because they were not PG 13.

“I would steal the carrots and run away.” Louis laughed before having a sip of his lemonade. No one was in the mood to drink now and even though we were actually legal in Alberta we really didn’t feel like it.

“If Payton was standing right there with whipped cream and Pizza and you had to choose one or the other what would you do Niall?” Zayn asked Niall who was scarfing down chicken wings like they were going out of style.

Niall laughed and blushed slightly. “Neither. I would pick Payton over food any day.”

We all gawked at Niall. Did those words really come out of his mouth? “Are you ill?” Louis replied before grabbing a chicken wing himself. “I think you’re ill. Since when does Niall Horan pick a girl over food?”

Niall blushed even more. “Since I found a girl that I love even more than food.”

I was pretty sure all of us just died inside. It was honestly one of the cutest things that Niall had ever said. Niall was just cute in general but to hear that come out of his mouth was something amazing. We all looked around and I played with my hands. They were pretty banged up since they got scratched when we got into Calgary because I fell out of the vehicle. I estimated the ground to be further away than it was and fell. Long legs aren’t always a blessing. I could hear Charlie complaining about how long hers were and how she wanted to be short. I made some joke about how if they weren’t that long she couldn’t rap them around my waist. I could see her blush again and it made me feel warm inside again.

“So Harry. If Charlie was in this room again what would you do?” Liam questioned with a mouthful of food.

Wow. I hadn’t really thought about that. I had thought about what I wanted to do to her but I didn’t know what I would want to do with her if I had her right now. I racked my brains when it hit me. I flushed just thinking about it. “I would lay here with her. Just lay here and enjoy the fact that she was with me.”

That brought on an “awe” from all the boys and several slaps on the back. I just wanted to be with her. More than anything I just wanted to be with her and enjoy her company. Everything was always fine when I was with her. I just wanted her company. Just wanted her in general. I wanted to hear her voice, feel her skin on mine, all of that. I suddenly had the urge to call her. Drove my hand into my pocket but there was nothing in it.

“Have you seen my phone?” I checked my other pocket and all I felt was my wallet and the thing I needed to give Charlie. Where was it? My life was on that thing. What If Charlie texted me and was freaking out that I didn’t reply.

“I think it was by the pool on the table.” Zayn answered.

I shot out of the room and dashed down to the pool. I didn’t even care that I was in my socks. I could honestly care less. I almost killed myself running on the pool deck but I was on a mission. I needed to tell Charlie just how much I loved her. I wanted to hear her voice giving me heck about what time it was. I didn’t care. My phone sat just where Zayn had said it was and I grabbed it immediately. I pressed the home button and noticed I had a text. It wasn’t from Charlie though. It was from someone else. I read it and my pace quickened. My hands felt sweaty and I didn’t know what to do. I had just figured out my girl problems. I only wanted Charlie. I didn’t want anyone else. I didn’t like her this way. She was just my friend and she only liked me that way too so I didn’t understand why I was so worried. Maybe I was doing mental foreshadowing. Maybe I was trying to tell myself that something was going to happen… Nah. Couldn’t be. I quickly closed the text and dialed Charlie’s number. As the tone rang I ended up thinking about what it read. It wouldn’t mess things up? I knew what I wanted and she couldn’t have feelings for a guy that was dedicated to a girl. I had a girlfriend and that would be a warning flag right? Even when Charlie picked up I was still thinking about it.

Hey Harry, it’s Ashley.

Liam and Zayn invited Valeria and Sara and me

to New York and then to LA! Can’t wait to see you again,

I wanna get to know you more and I hope you want to

get to know me too. xx :)

Chapter Fifteen (Charleese)

Today was one of those days. I wasn’t happy but I wasn’t upset at the same time. I really didn’t understand what was going on with me today. It couldn’t be PMS because I had just finished all that last week, and I had just talked to Harry about fifteen minutes ago and I really couldn’t figure out what was wrong.

It was my day off and I was just chilling at home. Kailee was over and Payton and her were baking something. I was lounging on the couch in my underwear with my headphones blasting in my ears. I hadn’t bothered in getting dressed today and Kailee and Payton had seen me in my underwear hundreds of times so they really didn’t care. Whatever they were baking smelt fantastic and I couldn’t wait to eat it but something was missing, I really didn’t know what though.

Harry and I had just talked for about an hour. They were in New York and he said he was going shopping and wanted to buy me some stuff. I told him that I had my own money to buy myself stuff and he laughed at me.

“I am very much aware of that Charlie but that does not mean I cannot spoil my girlfriend with some clothes.” He said to me. His voice was so seductive that I wanted to jump through the phone and get to him but of course I couldn’t do that.  I could hear Louis in the background saying that the bra Harry had in his hands was way to reveling and that I would never wear it in my life.

I simply shook my head, smiled to myself and sighed. “Don’t spend more than two hundred dollars on me okay Harry.” I had given up because I knew that if I had told him not to buy me anything at all he would just buy out everything he saw.

There was some confusion on the other end and I could practically see Harry blushing. “I already spent that and more…” he trailed off and he whispered to Louis, he was obviously trying to make sure I didn’t hear but that wasn’t happening. He was never good at doing that with his phone. “I’ll get it for her anyways, she will wear it eventually and I don’t think the lace will be that scratchy.”

“Harry!” I shouted into the phone. I was laughing at what I was hearing. I bet they were in Victoria’s Secret or La Vie en Rose or someplace like that going crazy and picking out the most lude stuff they could find. I really couldn’t imagine what Harry had picked out and when I did it just made me blush and miss him more. Surprisingly he did have good taste in underwear. “I have enough underwear! I have two drawers full of it and I don’t really need a third!”

Harry cleared his voice and I was picturing his dimples as I could tell he was most likely smiling. “Too bad, and I promise I won’t spend more than five hundred dollars on you.”

“Five hundred! Harry that is way…” I was going to protest about how much money he was spending on me when he cut me off.

“Got to go Charlie, phone is dying. Text you later, love you, I ordered you some flowers for our five month anniversary! Hope you get them soon. I wish I could kiss you but I can’t. Love you!” he quickly hung up and I laid there for a moment.

That was what I was missing! That was what felt wrong! I couldn’t believe I didn’t catch it the first time! Mind you when he was about to hang out his speech came out really muddled. I clicked the home button on my iPhone and went to my calendar. Sure enough it was, bookmarked on today’s date. It had been a week since they had left, even though it felt like an eternity. Honestly I felt like I was the worst girlfriend in the world for forgetting. He had remembered. He had actually remembered and sent flowers. I hadn’t even noticed that Kailee had just gone to the door and she had a vase in her hands filled with twelve pink and white roses. My favorite. My heart felt like it had hit the floor. I quickly yanked out my headphones and dashed to go grab them from her.

“You forgot didn’t you?” she said quietly. I had faint tears in my eyes as I took them and eagerly took the ivory cardstock out from the holder.

I looked at her and then at the floor. “I can’t believe I forgot.” I said half-heartedly. I was totally beating myself up for it. I felt like I got hit by a bus for forgetting and I felt like I had hung Harry out to dry.

“I can’t believe he remembered.” Payton gave me a small smile as I opened the note. It wasn’t in Harry’s writing but it had him and his vocabulary written all over it.

Dear Charleese,

Yes I did use your full name. Deal with it, I love it.

I wish I was there with you. I miss you like crazy.

Things aren’t the same without you.

Please accept these roses, I saw them and thought

“they are pretty, but will never be as pretty as you.”

You are beautiful, fantastic, and I love you for everything.

I would write you a novel but I will leave that

to you.

Thank you for putting up with me for five months. I wish

we could be together and go where we did for our one month anniversary.

That was what I had planned to do with you for this one

but sadly I am away.

I love you. Never forget that.

xx,

Harry.

By the end of the note I was pretty much sobbing. I was shaking, tears were rolling down my face and I wanted to go hide under the counter like I use to when I was a kid when I was upset. How had I ended up with such a fantastic boyfriend? One that sent me notes like that and did what he did for me tonight? I didn’t understand how I could deserve this. Me of all people. There were so many more pretty girls out there and he had picked me. And I didn’t even remember that it was our five month anniversary. Payton and Kailee both had their arms around me but I shook them off.

“I’m going to my room.” I choked out before slumping over to my room with my flowers, card, and phone.

“Charlie wait!” Payton called just before I shut my door.

Her eyes were teary too as they met mine and a few more tears fell down my face. She wanted to comfort me, she wanted to hug me and make me feel better. That was not going to happen. I wanted to cry, and I felt like I needed too. “I want to be alone for a bit okay, I need to text Harry and say thank you.”

She nodded just before I shut my door and set my flowers on my night stand. Without another thought or another word I collapsed onto my unmade/unkempt bed and buried my face into the fluffy feather pillow on Harry’s side of the bed and screamed. I screamed as loud as I could and inhaled the scent that had lingered on the pillow case. I had neglected to change my sheets since Harry left and I they had been on my bed for about a month already. I was never someone to not make their bed so for me not to make it was shocking. I watched as my mascara smeared over the white pillow case and I slowly picked up a lock of brown curly hair that had stuck to it. I was finding Harry’s hair in the oddest of places. I had cleaned my bathroom and found it in the shower drain, on my hairbrush, in the bra I had stuck on today and even stuck to my mascara brush. Heaven only knew how it got there.

The more I breathed into my pillow the more I started to cry. Harry. Harry Harry Harry Harry Harry Harry Harry. He was all I could think about at the moment.  I just didn’t know what to do with myself. I reached for my phone and texted Harry a quick thank you for the flowers and wished him happy five months while I was at it. Honestly I was so mad with myself that I had forgotten I didn’t know what to do with myself.  The note sat on the nightstand and I felt like it was burning into the wood. His words had hung in my mind and they echoed back and forth.  He had stuff planned for what we were going to do. How far ahead had he planned it? Surely before they knew they were coming to America. I was fine before, I wasn’t as mopey as I had been before but now my heart ached for him. I just wanted him back. I wanted to feel his curly hair in my hands and his lips on mine and I wanted to sit with him and talk for hours like we use too.

I knew what I needed to do. I quickly got up, stuck some jeans on, a cream colored t-shirt and slipped my feet into my gold sparkly flats. I didn’t even think of another thing before I started ripping the sheets off my bed. One of the feather pillows went flying and quickly exploded, sending feathers everywhere but I didn’t even bother with cursing about it. As soon as the sheets were off my bed and in a pile I found my lavender button up coat and purse and walked out of the door. I tried to look as composed as possible when Kailee and Payton looked at me.

“Are you okay? You need a hug?” Payton asked before standing up and handing me a slice of coffee cake that Kailee and her made. Her brown eyes were warm and I took the coffee cake in her hand.

“Can I borrow your car?” I asked her with a nod. I still didn’t have one and Harry kept hinting that he would buy me one but I didn’t want him to do that for me and I really had no problem with borrowing Payton’s when I needed to go somewhere. I burrowed my eyes into hers and I could tell she knew I had something on my mind.

“Yes, where are you going?”

“Out.” I replied quickly before grabbing her keys and going to the door. I slammed it hard, ran down the stairs and dashed to her little white Audi that was parked ironically to Harry’s motionless black Range Rover. I started the ignition, backed out and headed out on my merry way. I knew where I was going and when I got there maybe I would feel less horrible. It was a place that had meant the world to me when Harry had brought me there and it wasn’t that hard to get too. Once I found the highway I cranked the music up, let my foot down on the accelerator and cruised like a girl on a mission; which I was.

It was snowing lightly when I parked her car near where Harry had parked it the first time I he brought me here. I didn’t really worry that it was snowing and cold when I opened the door, ditched my shoes and walked out into the sand that covered the beach of Camber Sands. Harry had brought me here for our one month anniversary and if he was here it would have been where he was taking me tonight. I wound my way over to the tree that we sat underneath and sat below it. I could still picture our moment here, and it was one that I never wanted to forget.

_________________________________________

“I’m really cold Harry, why would you bring us to a beach when it’s like November and we can’t even go swimming?” I complained as we walked along the beach in our bare feet. The whole ride down Harry wouldn’t tell me where we were going and I could tell wherever we were going was going to be fantastic. When we initially got their I was so overwhelmed with the beauty of the moonlight around us and the stars that I didn’t know what to say. Harry simply took my hand and we walked down the beach. He had picked me up just after eight at night and said he knew it was late but it had to be when we went. I knew it was because he wanted me to see the moon and the stars.

Harry stooped over and let me get on his back so I didn’t have to keep my feet in the freezing sand. I wound my legs around him so I could keep them warm. He walked a little bit further before stopping beneath a tree and setting me down.  He did this all without saying a word. He pulled out a blanket from the bag he was carrying and laid it down before grabbing another one, sitting down and holding his arms out for me to snuggle in with him. I smiled and sat down rather clumsily and buried myself into his warmth.

 “Do you like this?” he asked me while I gazed at the bright moon that made his green eyes glow in the light.

I leaned my lips up to kiss his and smiled. “As long as I’m with you I’d be happy.” I breathed to him. He pulled out a bottle of sparking apple juice and we sat there and watched the waves roll in and out. I couldn’t believe how beautiful it was. I could have stayed her all night if it was possible but I would most likely end up with frost bitten toes if I did that. “It’s beautiful.” I said to him just as the moon was right overhead. It could have been hours in between the last words of conversation we spoke but I was so happy I didn’t care.

“Not as beautiful as you. And happy one month Charleese. I love you.” he replied before we shared a kiss that I would remember for the rest of time.

___________________________________________

My phone was constantly buzzing and with flashes of Kailee’s face or Payton’s. Louis face popped up a couple of times and so did Niall’s but I refused to answer it. The one person I would have wanted to talk to wasn’t calling or texting me so I didn’t bother picking up the phone. My feet were blue and I couldn’t feel my face because I was sure my tears had frozen on but I felt good here. It was where I wanted to be. It reminded me of Harry and I was able to breathe here without worrying about where he was or what he was doing. All that mattered to me was how much I loved him.

My phone was telling me it was one in the morning. I had left the apartment at about eight and it took two hours to get here so I had been here for about three hours. That didn’t change the fact that Harry wasn’t with me now, on the night we needed to spend together, and a night when the moon was full. I saw car lights flash to the left of me but I didn’t bother moving. I missed Harry and this place was the only place I knew I wanted to be tonight. I was still beating myself up for the fact that I had forgotten our anniversary but what could you do. I was crazy. I was insane, and I was in love with a boy that was an ocean away from me.

“She’s over here Payton!” Kailee’s voice called from somewhere but I didn’t bother in looking. I just stared with a blank look on my face at the waves that crashed in and out. Two figures appeared in front of me with worried looks on their faces and quickly put a blanket around me.

“Don’t you ever do that to me again Charlie! I almost called the cops because I was so worried about where you were! I called Niall and Kailee called Louis! They were so scared they almost felt like hopping on a plane and coming to help look for you!” Payton scolded. My heart broke at the thought of that and it just reminded me of Harry. 

My eyes met with Payton’s and my chest erupted with sobs. The tears started to flow and both Kailee and her pulled me into a hug. “I just miss him Payton.” I sobbed into her shoulder. It was just that simple. I missed him. My heart was breaking and I honestly didn’t know what to do with myself anymore.  “I’m sorry.” I breathed into her shoulder and continued to cry. They both rubbed my back and we stayed there for a moment before they pulled me back up and held out my shoes for me.

“I know you do. Let’s go back home. You can crawl in with me tonight.” Payton nodded before they walked me silently down the beach and the only sound around was the snuffling of my nose and the waves that went in and out of the beach. Nothing could feel the hole in my heart now accept for maybe seeing Harry again. But even then I felt like I was empty inside without him. Anniversaries were supposed to be happy times. Tonight wasn’t a happy night. Before I hopped into the passenger seat in Payton’s car I looked out across the water one last time.

“Happy five months Harry. I love you.” I said before Payton pulled away and I pressed my hand to the glass of the window of her car.

Chapter Sixteen (Harry)

Apparently Charlie had somewhat of a mental breakdown the other night. Louis and Niall had said Kailee and Payton had called frantically on our first night in New York about how Charlie had gone missing. She had run off on our five month anniversary and they didn’t know where she went. She didn’t tell me about it and I had just found out a few moments ago. She drove two hours to Camber Sands and hung out there until Kailee and Payton found here. Niall and Louis were worried and had felt like flying home to help look for her because it was very out of character for Charlie to run off like that. I was mad that they hadn’t told me but I didn’t condemn her behavior. I had called her right after I found out to make sure she was okay and Payton had picked up and said Charlie was drunk out of her mind and they were going to find her to take her home. Charlie? Drunk? That was impossible. She was not the kind of girl that was reckless in that sense to go out and get wasted.  Whatever was going on she was obviously going crazy and I was hoping it wasn’t all brought on because of my absence. I would never forgive myself if I was the reason she pickled her liver and killed her kidneys.

We were all sitting in Johnny Rockets with Sara, Valeria, and Ashley and eating whatever we had ordered. I had found myself picking at some chips and sipping on a milkshake of some sorts. I didn’t really notice what flavor it was since Ashley had ordered it for me. I was extremely worried about Charlie. I knew for one she could get partly looped on three glasses of wine and she got pretty out of character when she was under the influence of just three. If she was drunk I bet she was the polar opposite of what she normally was. She had been dealing just fine with everything. We had hardly any problems. If anything I was the one with the problem. The thing I had forgotten to give her sat burning in my pocket and it didn’t help that I was counting down the days til’ I would be back to give it to her.

I was tapping my phone furiously, waiting for Charlie to call me back when Ashley laid her small hand over top of mine. She looked pretty today. She was in a pair of jeans with a white jean jacket and tank top and smelt like Hollister. Her hair was curled and her eyes seemed to sparkle in the minimal light. I felt bad that I was saying this but it was true. She was pretty and she was a good friend. Whenever I needed to talk to someone about Charlie I went to her. I had no feelings for her and I was sure she had none for me so I think we were doing just fine. That didn’t stop the fact that my cheeks flushed a bit when her skin touched mine.

“Harry can you please stop. You are shaking the table.” She said sweetly to me before stealing a fry and dipping it into her milkshake.

“Ashley he doesn’t even care about the table breaking and he only wants to have a laugh.” Sara giggled from across where she was casually holding hands with Zayn and they were feeding each other onion rings dipped in ranch sauce. She looked good to in her simple long sleeved top and leggings. Her and Zayn got along great and were always on the phone with each other or in this case talking with each other and being cute. It was nice to see him with a sweet girl. And my sweet girl was across the ocean probably puking her guts out.

“That is my line Sara!” Zayn joked before shoving more food into her mouth and she doubled over laughing. I remember when I did that to Charlie when we went out for ice-cream. It was one of those cute moments that I wanted to cherish.

“Maybe she is dancing with some guy and doesn’t want to talk to you right now.” Ashley offered rather flatly before she stuffed her mouth with food.  Her eyes met mine in an instant and she started shaking her head furiously. “Wait no! I didn’t mean that!”

I slouched over. I could practically see Charlie now; grinding with some random guy and his hands all over those curvy hips of hers. I could see the cab pulling up and her getting into it with him and going to his flat and him unzipping her dress and her touching his chest and him carrying her to the bedroom. I could hear the song Mr. Brightside by The Killers ringing in my ears.

“Excuse me for a moment.” I said just as my phone buzzed and Charlie’s face appeared. My worries slowly got amplified as I shook the images from my brain. She couldn’t do that and she wouldn’t. She loved me and I loved her right? I got up and walked out to the street before I answered it. “Charlie?” I said rather hurriedly.

“Hi Harry, how are you?” she said lightly. She wasn’t slurring any words and she didn’t sound overly happy. If anything she sounded rather upset. She was quiet and I had heard her sniffle. It felt good that I wasn’t right about what was thinking that Charlie was doing. And Payton had obviously lied about her being drunk.

I shook my head and sat down on a bench that was on the street. “I am okay, Payton said you were totally wasted and at a club.” I told her and found myself seeing how I had a grass stain on my white converse. I could wash them later.

There was silence on the other end for a moment. I heard her sniffle a bit more before she sighed. I could see her sitting in her room in front of her vanity. It sounded like she was crying. “She would love for me to go get wasted but I can’t force myself out the door let alone get dressed up and go party.”

I found myself sighing with relief that she was at home. Then again I was not happy that she was moping at home. I was moping somewhat too so I guess I shouldn’t be talking. “Charlie everything is okay, I will be home in fourteen days. You have nothing to worry about okay love? Go have some fun.”

I heard her nod and wipe a tear from her face. I could picture her smiling and blushing. “Would you be mad if I told you I am lying in your bed at your place right now?”

“What do you have on? Nothing? If so I am flying back right now.” I chuckled as I pictured her face. I was glad that she wasn’t out with any guy and that I was most likely the only guy she wanted to be with. Besides Patrick Kane from the Chicago Blackhawks hockey team. He was my only competition but I had her heart. I knew I had it, I think she was just afraid that she wouldn’t have mine at the end of all this. Even though that was not an option. It was hers and it was going to stay that way until otherwise.

She laughed her cute little laugh that I missed so much. “I have clothes on Harry. I know better than to be around you in minimal to no clothing even if it is over the phone. I do get slightly uncomfortable.”

“We will just have to change that then.” I replied just as everyone walked out of the front door and walked towards me. I guess it was time to go so I decided to say goodbye. “I got to go love; I love you to the moon and back.”

I could tell her smile got a lot bigger, as did mine. I did love her to the moon and back, things were just getting hard and I could tell the distance was taking its toll on us. “I love you too Harry.” she sighed. “Ps. When was the last time you changed your sheets?”

I smirked; Ashley sat down beside me and met my eyes for a moment. She looked really sorry for what she said but it must have just slipped out at the time. I slung my arm over her shoulder lightly just as I said my last words to Charlie. “Four months ago, they smelt like you so I didn’t want to change them. Bye love.”

“Harry! That is disgusting!” she shouted at me. “Bye! Love you too!” she hung up and I sat back with a smile on my face.  I knew I had nothing to worry about and she didn’t have anything to worry about either.

“Harry I am sorry for what I said. I know she isn’t like that.” Ashley apologized before meeting my eyes again.

I smiled at her. I knew I had nothing to worry about. I knew I wouldn’t lose her and I knew that I didn’t have to worry about Ashley liking me as more as a friend. That wasn’t possible. She was very understanding about Charlie so I didn’t have to worry. “Everything is just fine and I have nothing to worry about in any sense.”

She nodded. “So are we going for ice-cream now? I know we just ate but I want to try that ice-cream place down the way.”

“We are going there too.” Liam smiled down at Valeria who was on his arm. They looked very cute together as well and I knew she made him happy. No doubt about it they would end up together.

I looked at them and then back at Ashley. Maybe some ice-cream would be good seeing as I had nothing to worry about with Charlie and ice-cream was something friends did regularly. I nodded and we got up. Ashley hooked her arm through mine and we all paraded down the street. See? Nothing to worry about. Charlie was just fine. I was just fine and Ashley just liked me as a friend. I was worried at the beginning for whatever reason but now I figured I didn’t have anything to worry about. She wouldn’t mess up Charlie and I’s relationship at all. Would she?

Chapter Seventeen (Charleese)

I knew I was about to get a lecture from Andreae. It was coming. She was going to give me a lecture about being this upset that my boyfriend was away. I could feel it coming on. Mostly because I had annoyed her with my playlist of sad music for my whole shift since the store was pretty much dead. I took some time and bought some new underwear. I even got a striped thong and called it my tomlinthong. I texted Harry and told him I bought one and he texted back with a winky face and said he couldn’t wait to see it. I blushed and then burst out laughing because Andreae had seen what I sent him and what he replied with and she gave me her –what-in-the-world-did-you-just-say-Charleese-Everatt- look. It was one that I got frequently on Friday nights when Harry would come and pick me up after work and he would say stuff.

I was dealing as best I could. This meant that I had gained about five pounds from eating a pound of ice-cream every night. Payton had let me sleep with her most nights because in the morning she would find me at Harry’s in his bed or on the couch crying with a bowl of popcorn at three in the morning. The boys were still in New York and Harry had told me that they had changed their schedule and would be there for another six days and spend the other six in LA. I was over the moon that I would get to see him in just twelve days and have him back and just a moment away from me.  At the same time though I was wondering how things were going to be with us. I wanted them to be the same but at the same time I don’t know if they were going to be. I had gained five pounds, and I wasn’t exactly the happiest person and I would most likely burst into tears when I saw him again and I wasn’t sure if he was still going to love me. All I could do was hope that when he said “I love you” all the time, he meant it. Because every time I said it. I meant every word of it.

The words to The Distance by Hot Chelle Rae filled the room for the third time today and Andreae immediately stormed over to my iPhone, clicked it open and stuck on Celebrate by Kool and the Gang. She gave me an unimpressed glare just as we began a mad dash to switch the song. Several songs started but didn’t get to play because of our mad grab. We heard the first five seconds of Before the Storm by the Jonas Brothers, You Are Loved by Josh Groban and For the First Time by The Script before she finally snatched it out of my grasp and put on Call Me Maybe by Carly Rae Jepson. She set my phone down lightly just as I sat on the counter with an ashamed look on my face. That song was truly how I felt about everything that was going on. The distance is what’s killing me. Time and space has become the enemy. Those words were just so true lately that it was pretty much on repeat all the time. I guess hearing it three times over and over and over would cause you to want to shoot it. Normally I would have never done something like that but I guess I was missing Harry so much that it was affecting everything I did. I had gotten in the bath the other day to shave and it didn’t feel the same. Harry wasn’t on the other side of the door with a bag of chips waiting for me to come out. And he also wasn’t in the bath with my either. It was just awkward without him.

“Charleese Everatt.” Andreae started before taking off her glasses and cleaning them on her simple silky blouse and replacing them on her pretty face. Her glasses framed her brown eyes so nicely and suited her face. She looked really pretty even when she was glaring at me and shaking her head with an unimpressed look on her face. “You need to stop being all depressed about Harry being gone and loosen up a bit. Depressing music isn’t going to make you feel any better.”

I stared at my hands. Yup. Here was my lecture. “I know.” I said lightly before twirling the bracelets Harry had given me around my wrists. I wore both of them all the time. The one he bought me and the one that he had made me. I never took them off. Not even to shower.

“No you do not know! You have been mopey all week at work! He is coming home in twelve days! You can do it! You are a woman! You do not need a man to make you who you are!” she continued her speech with a big smile on her face. She expected me to be all “You’re right!” when really all I did was grin a bit and pick up my phone where a text from someone was waiting.

Coming to pick you up from work.

Stay there. We have a surprise.

Kailee. xx

I shut off my phone and looked back at Andreae who was waiting for my grand reply but I really didn’t have one. “I want him back with me. It is that simple. You saw me the other day when I was trying to write. I couldn’t even write a sentence.” That was rather shocking for me. I never got writers block this bad. I had brought Harry’s journal that he got me expecting to be able to write and write and write but I didn’t even write one word. The only thing I had written in it was my name where it said “This belongs to.” It was a very scary situation for me. I even ripped out one page thinking something good would happen. Nope. No words flowed out of my black Jack Wills pen.

Andreae took my hands in hers and smiled sweetly. The smile that she gave me when she wanted me to cheer up. It said “everything would be alright” and I was hoping that it would be. “Charlie, he loves you, and he will be back and will love you even more than he did before and you two can be all inappropriate with each other in the back room just like you use to be.”

A blush rose to my cheeks as Kailee and Payton came into the store. They wiped their boots on the welcome mat because it was still snowing and came in rather flustered. “Thanks Andreae.” I said to her before turning to my girls. “Why are you picking me up? I was going to walk back.”

Payton smiled brightly and Kailee went to grab my coat. “Change of plans love. We are kidnapping you and going for a girls night.” She adjusted her Burberry scarf that Niall had bought her for her birthday and flipped her short blonde hair around.

I looked at Andreae who simply nodded. “Go, it’s pretty dead in here anyways.” she waved to Payton and Kailee who had reappeared with my coat and went into the back room.

I stared at my girls. They were both smirking as I got my coat on and took my phone off the counter and grabbed my leather bound journal from Harry. “Where are we going?” I asked light heartedly. I really didn’t want to go anywhere but home and Skype with Harry but that clearly wasn’t happening because they were pulling me outside into the snow and to Kailee’s car.

“We are going to my place and having a boyfriend free night. No texts, no Skype, and no calls.” Kailee said brightly before snatching up my phone before I could protest. Her brown hair was tucked into her high necked coat and her eyes shined against the snow. She meant all business.

“Hey!” I shouted at them. “Harry is supposed to call me!” I protested, once again trying to grab my phone. Payton shoved me into the back of Kailee’s car and slammed the door before getting in the passenger side.

“This is for your own good Charlie. For all of us.” Without another word Kailee started the car and we pulled into traffic. Clearly I was not about to argue with them. They wanted to show me that I didn’t need a boy to be happy. Just like Andreae said. Right now though; I felt like Harry was all I needed to get my smile back.

______________________________________________

We had ended up on having a really long movie marathon. We had watched all my favorite movies. A Cinderella Story, 13 Going on 30 and most importantly The Lizzie Mcguire Movie. I had probably eaten my body weight in popcorn but I really couldn’t care. All I listened to was Payton and Kailee answering my phone and telling Harry he was not allowed to talk to me at the moment. He had called six times and Payton was on the phone with him for the seventh right now. I tried to focus on what was on the TV screen which was when Hilary Duff met the Italian guy and he says “Scusa” but I couldn’t. Kailee was too busy holding me back from grabbing my phone.

“Harry in all honesty she is dying to talk to her but this is our girl’s night and that means no boyfriends allowed.” Payton said teasingly into the phone before turning away from my begging eyes.

“Just let me talk to him Payton. It is not a bad thing if I talk to him and just say hello! Please?” I begged. My eyes were pleading with her now. I just wanted to hear his voice and tell him I loved him. I knew he knew that but I just wanted him to hear it again. I didn’t want to be this crazy but it was getting hard. All around Kailee’s apartment were pictures of her and Louis and the boys. And on her mantle she had one with me and Harry at Christmas time. I was in my plaid PJ’s and a Santa hat and he was in a t-shirt and PJ pants that said “Ho Ho Ho” all over them. Harry’s mom had taken the picture Christmas morning after Harry had given me my bracelet. I stared down at the charm just as Payton said goodbye.

“Look you can talk to each other tomorrow. You can go a day. It will not kill you.” she hung up without saying anything more and plopped down on the couch beside me. “You two are crazy.” She said simply before popping a chocolate into her mouth. Her brown eyes were teasing slightly but at the same time she was sincere. She knew that I was upset with him being gone and it wasn’t easy for us.

“You can’t blame her though. Harry has helped her through so much and him being gone is hard.” Kailee said before handing me a can of Sprite and opening it for me. She was in stripes which just made me think of Louis which caused me to think of Harry even more and I quickly chugged half the can of Sprite.

“I miss Niall too but I know we are going to be okay when he comes back. So are you and Harry.” Payton hugged me quickly before grabbing her laptop and turning it on. “How about we read the rag mag hmm? See what’s going on around the world?”

I quickly nodded and hugged a pillow to my chest just as she brought everything up. That would make me feel better. Yes it would. I watched as Payton and Kailee stared eagerly at the screen with smiles before they quickly faded. They stared at me for a moment before returning to the screen. “What?” I questioned just as they tried to shut down the tab.

“Nothing.” Kailee said. “Nothing at all.”

Clearly they were looking at something they didn’t want me to see and I tore the computer out of Payton’s hands and opened the tab to see what they were looking at. It took me a while to realize what exactly they were looking at when I saw the picture. Harry was walking down the street, arm and arm with some random blonde girl. He was smiling and had a few shopping bags in his hands. She was grinning up at him with an adoring look and was leaning into his side. The girl was pretty; with long curled blonde hair, bright blue eyes and a petite frame. She had to be at least twenty pounds lighter than I was. The caption below the picture read: Harry Styles of One Direction seen with unknown blonde. Is his five month relationship with Charlie Everratt on the rocks or done for good. I kept reading down the page and a quote caught my eye. “Reports say that Charlie is utterly dismayed by the fact that her darling boyfriend is cheating. A source tells us that she is almost ready to break off the relationship. Others say that it is Harry who wants out. Stay tooned for more information on this relationship.”

I stared blankly at the computer screen and Payton took it sadly out of my hands. “Don’t listen to it Charlie. It is just off the rag mag site and doesn’t mean anything.” She patted my shoulder and I yanked my arm away and curled deeper into my little ball, wrapping myself around the pillow and trying to disappear.

I really couldn’t believe what I saw. I knew he was hanging out with a girl but I didn’t think that it would lead to anything like that. I think her name was Ashley or something but honestly I could care less. The fact that he was with another girl broke my heart. Were they fooling around behind closed doors too? I really didn’t want to think about that. My heart had sunk and everything around me seemed to be so much bigger than it actually was.

“Everything is fine okay? After all he called seven times.” Kailee said hopingly before pausing the movie. Her eyes met mine and mine blurred momentarily as they filled with tears.

“I thought he loved me.” I whispered out loud. I really didn’t mean to say that aloud but it slipped out. Payton came over and wrapped her arms around me as the tears fell. That really just messed everything up for me. I felt crappy now. Was everything he felt a lie or was this not a big deal. I didn’t know what to think.

Kailee took the computer and started typing frantically on the keyboard. She clicked a few times before she stood up and went to grab her purse. I looked around at her and when she sat down she gave me a knowing smile. Obviously she was up to something.

“What are you doing?” I asked her. My voice cracking from the tears. Payton’s brown eyes met mine and she shrugged just as Kailee opened her mouth.

“I am doing what we should have done in the first place. We need a vacation. I am booking three flights to LA for twelve days and we are getting away from here.”

Chapter Eighteen (Harry)

I found myself standing in the shower. I really didn’t need one but then again I liked being in the shower so I ended up in the shower. I really didn’t know why I was thinking about why I was in the shower when I was in the shower but my mind was pretty much empty at this hour of the morning anyways. Charlie had called me to tell me they were going on a small vacation but was not allowed to tell me where. She seemed pretty excited about it but did sound slightly upset too. I didn’t even have to ask why she was upset because I knew the answer right away.  The article that was online. Fifteen minutes after it was release my phone blew up with texts, tweets, phone calls and even someone trying to face time me. The boys burst into the room and slammed the door and flipped out because they wanted to know what was going on and then my mum called. There was no way of not answering that phone call and it was quite a scary one.

“Harry Edward Styles are you playing with your lovely girlfriend’s heart?” She shouted at me so loud that I had to hold my phone away from my ear. I could tell she was pissed at me because she really got off with Charlie when I introduced them to each other. They baked some cookies together and even made dinner and when I got up in the morning they were chatting easily over coffee.  She was honestly so perfect with my mum I couldn’t be happier and she made me the happiest guy in the world anyways.

The answer to that question was easy. I didn’t even have to think about it because I wouldn’t play around with any girls heart no matter who’s it was.  “No mum, I just saw the article now I swear I didn’t know anyone saw. And you know I love Charlie to bits so you have nothing to worry about. I just went out with Ashley and it just sort of happened. It wasn’t my idea.” It really wasn’t. I had made it plenty clear that I was in love with Charlie and she seemed to understand it for the most part. She was pretty supportive of the relationship as far as I could tell and all I could see in Ashley was a friend anyways. We hung out, got on well and that was the end of that in my mind at least. The boys all looked at me and shrugged and nodded to each other. They knew I wasn’t screwing Charlie over and that they had nothing to worry. At least I hoped so.

My mum sighed into the phone. “Harry please don’t break her heart. You don’t know how much you mean to her and she is probably going crazy without you so please don’t mess this up.” I could tell my mum was being sincere. She was telling me not to do anything wrong. She was doing the motherly thing and looking out for both of us.

I knew in my heart I would never do anything wrong to hurt Charlie. That was silly to think anyways. I loved her. I knew that I meant a lot to her and she meant the world to me. She still didn’t know how much exactly but I planned to show her as soon as I could give her the other part of her birthday present. I fiddled with mine on my chain just as I replied to my mom. “I won’t mum, you know that.”

My mum chuckled. “Good to hear Harry. And can you please make sure you hoist your pants up with you are out in public. Charlie might like seeing the band of your underwear in the front but I don’t think you need to flash it all the time.”

I laughed and told my mum I loved her and we said goodbye. The boys then did their own round of questions about what was going on after that and I respected that. They didn’t think that there was anything going on it was just a surprise to see something like that. I didn’t think there was anything going on anyways.

“Harry! Get out of the shower! I need one too and I swear if you used up all the hot water I will send Charlie a picture of what you bought her for her birthday and forgot to give to her.” Louis yelled from behind the bathroom door just as the water started to run cold.

“Getting out right now Lou!” I shouted before shutting the taps off and dashing out the shower so Louis couldn’t do what he said. That was still supposed to be a surprise and I intended on keeping it that way. As much as I wanted Charlie to know about it I really didn’t want her to find out through Louis and a simple picture. I had a whole speech prepared on how I was going to give it to her and I intended to give her that too. Hopefully anyways. That was if everything would go as planned and there were no interruptions.

Louis raised his eyebrows at me when I walked out with a towel around my waist and my wet hair pushed back. He was in the process of getting undressed for the shower and was chuckling. “The boy who once walked out of the shower and into a room dripping wet now decides to wear a towel; new concept.”

I rolled my eyes. It was somewhat of a habit now because I had to be careful when Charlie was around. There were several times when I didn’t bother covering up and she would yell at me, turn around and throw a pillow at me. Surprisingly she had good aim when she wasn’t looking and from then on I learned not to walk around with my willy out unless I wanted to be put into excruciating pain. “I did use up all the hot water.” I smiled cheekily before picking up my phone. Charlie had texted me a picture of a bikini she was bringing. It was lilac purple and strapless with ruffles. Sadly it was just lying on her familiar navy floral suitcase and she didn’t have it on but I could picture her in my head with it on. It just made me want to jump on a plane and meet her wherever she was going. We would be reunited in eleven days anyways so I wasn’t as antsy as I was before.

“I knew you would. Whenever you need to think about something you always use it up.” Louis shrugged before he stepped out of his pants and into the bathroom.

I knew what he meant by that. I found myself thinking about whatever was going on with Ashley. She couldn’t like me could she? No she wouldn’t, I was taken and head over heels in love with my girlfriend anyways. “Thinking is good for me.” I replied before grabbing my pants and sticking my so called scrawny legs into them. Charlie had always said I had really skinny ankles and legs and had taken to calling them scrawny. I didn’t take any offence to it because they were pretty skinny.

Louis peeked his head out the door again; his hair was pushed in the way that Kailee liked it on him. He didn’t do it that often but it was pretty evident today that he missed her. I noticed he had pulled out the outfit she had bought him and the shoes that he wore when they first met. He met my eyes and raised his eyebrows. “I know what you’re thinking about Harry. You just don’t want to admit that something is going on with her even though you don’t feel the same way.” He then shut the door and left me in the room alone with my thoughts.

I didn’t want to be alone with my thoughts. I didn’t want to think about those possibilities. I did think Louis was wrong though. Most of the time I agreed with him but on that comment I couldn’t. There was nothing going on. Nothing at all. Was there? No there wasn’t. Nothing was going to happen. As long as I kept telling myself that nothing was going to happen nothing was going to happen. I didn’t care if I sounded repetitive it was just not going to happen.

There was a quick little knock at the door – probably one of the boys wanting to go out for breakfast – and I went over to get it. My pants were still not done up and I had neglected to find a shirt but the boys wouldn’t care, they saw me naked most of the time so it wasn’t a big deal at all. I opened the door and shoved my wet hair out of my face only to be greeted by a very startled Ashley in her coat, jeans, and Uggs with two coffees in hand.

“Oh, erm… Morning.” She said nervously before staring at the floor making her perfectly curled hair frame her face. “I just uh… thought I’d bring you some coffee.”

I opened the door wider so she could come in and she nervously slouched through the door. “No problem.” I replied before shutting the door behind her and quickly zipping up my pants. My cheeks seemed to feel hot and my hands were getting clammy. Wait no!? This was not happening. The only person that was to make me feel that way was Charlie. No. Nope. Not happening. I quickly walked over to my suit case and pulled out a long sleeved T-shirt and slipped it over my head. Yes. Now this was less awkward. “What brings you to my room at this hour?” I asked her just as that feeling went away. There we go. All better Harry. All better.

She smiled at me and handed me the coffee. Our fingers brushed slightly and I was glad I didn’t feel anything by it. I could tell slightly that she shivered and her cheeks got a bit rosy. No. Louis and the boys could not be right. My mum couldn’t be right about this. The papers couldn’t not be right about this. Nothing was going on. Clearly it was one of those days where I wasn’t supposed to think about anything. Her eyes met mine and she blushed even more. “I thought we could go out for a walk in Central Park. It’s kind of snowy and really pretty out.” Ashley sipped her coffee and started picking at her nail polish.

I nodded. Nothing wrong with a small walk was there? No there was nothing wrong with that. It was early in the morning anyways and I could always text Charlie while we were walking anyways. “Sure no problem.” I replied before my phone buzzed from the bed. Ashley picked it up and I grabbed it out of her hands as she made a sort of distasteful face at the screen which was a picture of Charlie since she was calling me. “Morning love!” I said brightly into the phone.

“Morning Harry, It’s actually morning where I am! We just got in actually!” She said happily before continuing. “I would love to tell you where I am but Kailee and Payton would murder me.”

I laughed. Then I started racking my brains to figure out where in the world it was morning when I noticed Ashley tapping her foot frantically on the floor and staring out the window. She looked… annoyed? I brushed it off and decided that I could talk to Charlie later. “Have fun wherever you are love, you gonna get a tan for me?”

She giggled. “Maybe, and I might even let you see it. I got to go though because we are gonna go exploring.”

I shook my head and found my hair to almost be dry. I was happy it was drying quickly considering I was going out for a walk and I didn’t want to get sick. “Love you, have a good time and I look forward to this tan of yours.”

She said goodbye and love you just before I hung up and looked at Ashley. She was smiling at me now and stood up with my coat in hand. “Shall we?” she smiled before giving it to me. There was something off in her smile. And when I smiled back at her it wasn’t the same smile I gave her before. It was wary. I was beginning to think that maybe Louis was right.

_______________________________________________

“I just don’t understand how you can like having a bath! You are sitting in water with your own filth!” Ashley exclaimed to me as we strolled down one of the many pathways in Central Park. “I don’t even like them and I’m a girl and we are supposed to like bubble bath.”

I chuckled. I was starting to think that Louis was wrong because Ashley and I had been chatting easily without a problem. Her looks didn’t suggest anything and as long as we stayed off the topic of my girlfriend then she was okay. So maybe Louis was right in some aspect but I knew Louis and I knew he loved being right. “When you sit in a bath with someone you care about rather than alone you learn to love them.” I answered and looked over at her. She was playing with her hands again like she had been doing whenever I mentioned anything about dating and what not. Maybe I should say something to her to change that topic. “You should try that, find someone you care about and get them to fall for you and then take a bath. It is very enjoyable.”

She seemed to brighten a bit after that and she nodded swiftly. “So what did you get your girlfriend that you forgot to give her on her birthday?” she asked me before flipping her hair and sending a wave of the scent of Hollister towards me. She did smell good but not as good as Charlie. Charlie wore Bright Crystal Versace and she always smelt amazing whenever we were together. I really wanted to call her but I knew that would be rude when I was out with Ashley.

I blushed a bit. How did she know about that? Only my mum and the boys knew about it so it was concerning for me that she mentioned it.  “I got her something special but how did you know about that?”

She backed down slightly and looked away. “I might have heard the guys talking about it. I thought everyone knew about it.”

I shook my head. “No everyone does not because it is a surprise for Charlie.” I said rather coolly. I didn’t really mean to but it kinda bothered me that she knew considering I had only known her for about two weeks.

She turned back to me, her cleanly shaped eyebrows knitted together. “I didn’t know so don’t snap at me Harry.” For a moment she just held my gaze and then her features began to soften and she smiled again. “Do you miss her?”

Wait? Did she just get ticked and then bounce back? I had to think about what she said for a moment and then I answered her. “Yeah I do. More than anything.”

I really couldn’t understand how out of the blue her questions were getting and what was going on. It was a bit odd for me for her to snap and then to go back to normal. And why all the questions about Charlie? It bothered her before and now it was kind of puzzling that she was taking an interest. I watched as she slowly leaned into my side and looked up to me. “I think it’s cute that you care that much for someone. I wish someone could care like that for me.”

I stared down at her and then I made a point at looking at the trees that were ahead of me. The only thing I had to reply to that was what I would say to any girl. “You will find someone that cares for you.”

For a moment I thought she mumbled “I hope it is you.” but I wasn’t sure because she was talking really low and my phone rang because they boys called to say we had some stuff to do. I was pretending that she didn’t say that because that would just be another reason on why Louis would be right. There could not be anything going on. There just couldn’t be. It was honestly the point I had to keep reminding myself because I really didn’t want to have to deal with that. I didn’t care that my thoughts sounded like a crazy persons but honestly nothing could happen. It just couldn’t. If only I knew that something would happen and I would lose the girl that meant the world to me.

Chapter Nineteen (Charleese)

“Charlie get off your dang phone! We have to check in and then were going straight to the pool! Tell Harry he can wait!” Kailee yelled at me just as we pulled our suitcases through the lobby of The W hotel in LA. I had never been to LA before and I couldn’t believe how pretty it was. I had been in LAX but that was only because we had a connecting flight one time when we went to Hawaii. Being in the airport really didn’t count as being there so technically this was my first time to LA. Anyways I really loved all these palm trees, and the humidity and most of all the heat. 25°C was quite a change from the -6°C we had just come from. I felt like a fool being in shorts in Heathrow airport when we left but I knew it would be hot when we landed.

I usually hated long flights but as soon as we landed I felt… happy. I was smiling and the only thing I could think about was possibly seeing Harry in six days when they got here. Payton had asked where the boys were staying when they got here but I wasn’t sure so we just booked at The W and hoped for the best. I was banned from telling Harry anything about where we were or even what time zone it was because he would most likely figure out that we were in LA and hop on the next plane. I was a wreck when we were at home but for some reason I felt good being here. It was odd, all my worries and everything seemed to disappear. Even the girls noticed.

“This was a great idea Kailee! Look, she is already smiling from ear to ear!” Payton pointed out. Kailee smiled and went to check in and I sat down with my phone pressed to my ear since I was talking to Harry. “Tell your darling boyfriend of yours that you have to go get your bikini on even though it’s like eight in the morning where you are.”

I rolled my eyes. “I trust you heard that Harry?” I giggled as I could picture him smiling on the other end.

“I did, Have fun tanning love! I’ll talk to you later okay? Gotta go for lunch with the boys!” he said brightly to me before he hung up and I stuffed my phone into my Coach purse. I didn’t even care that we had only talked for ten minutes. It was odd. I used to get so upset when we only talked for three hours and all of a sudden I was okay with a ten minute conversation. Obviously this vacation had done something to me.

I sat back on my suitcase and smiled. Then I remembered that I was on my suitcase and I fell backwards, my head banging on the marble floor and my legs in the air. For the first time in a while I burst out laughing. I was actually laughing and smiling genuinely and Harry wasn’t even around. The feeling was… well great. To be happy again and being silly? It was wonderful. Payton started to laugh too and when Kailee handed me our room keys she too started to giggle. Soon we were all laughing our heads off and for no reason at all.

“Who knew a vacation would get you to smile again hmm?” Kailee commented before I sat up. Even after a twelve hour flight she looked flawless in her simple boho sundress and sandals. Even Payton looked put together in her skirt, flats, and tank top. I on the other hand probably looked the most rumpled in jean short shorts and my Aerie corset-like spaghetti strapped shirt. I had to say I really missed wearing my summer clothes and even though it was February I was still excited about getting out in my shorts.

The more I thought about it I really missed being like this. Carefree and just hanging out with my girls. I still missed Harry but now that we were in the same country it didn’t seem as bad for some reason. I think it was one of those feelings that I didn’t want to meddle with and that I just wanted to be happy with. I wanted to be happy with happiness if that made any sense. I didn’t want to think about being carefree and I was secretly dying to call up Andreae and tell her that she was right about me not worrying about my boyfriend. I wouldn’t do that of course because then I would get the whole “I told you so” speech.

I looked down at the room key and noticed the word suite on it. Then I looked up at Kailee. “You booked us suites?” I said dumbfounded. “Weren’t they ridiculously expensive?”

She flipped her brown hair over her shoulder and shrugged. “Only twenty more dollars a night than a normal room and that way we get our own beds and free breakfast every morning.” She quickly grabbed her suitcase and walked off to the elevators down the corridor. Suites? Seriously? I had never been in a suite in my life. This vacation suddenly seemed like one for a princess and not a pauper like me.

“Hey, I know what you’re thinking. You don’t deserve this vacation and don’t want to mess with the feeling that you have and you cannot understand why you are so happy all of a sudden. I know you Charleese Everratt and I am telling you sincerely that everything is not going to fall apart now that you’re all happy okay?” Payton told me as she grabbed her suitcase and linked her arm through mine.

She was right about part of what she said. I really didn’t think I deserved this great of a vacation and I really didn’t understand why I was so happy but on the other hand I didn’t think that everything was going to fall apart. Until now. I was known for making that happen. Everything would eventually come crashing down around me and mess everything up. Now I thought that would happen. I kept my eyes on the floor of the elevator and Payton noticed and hit my arm.

“What was that for?” I asked her quietly while rubbing my arm. The buttons on the elevator lit up every floor that we passed and it was getting closer to where we had to be.

“Now you are thinking about how things will fall apart. Go back to being care free. You will most likely see Harry in six days so please try to enjoy yourself these next few days with us okay? Be carefree, get a tan, get on the back of a guy’s motorbike and give Harry a heart attack or something! Just have fun I don’t care! I missed the happy you and I will make sure you stay happy these next six days okay? Please? Do it for my sake and my happiness? I wanna dance like a fool with you like we used too okay? Let’s do it and don’t give a crap about anything else hmm?!”

I smiled at her lecture. Her brown eyes burrowed into mine just as the elevator opened and we walked down the hallway to our room. I always loved her lectures. She always had a way to say what I needed to hear and mean it. Maybe she was right. Maybe I should just be carefree and stupid for a while? Sounded good to me at the moment. As for being really stupid and getting on a random guys motorbike? That was a stretch for me.

The double doors of our room were framed with gold metal and screamed “EXPENSIVE DO NOT TOUCH OR YOU WILL DIE” but I stuck my key card in the slot and decided to do what Payton suggested; be carefree and more or less not give a crap about anything at the moment.  The doors opened and we were flooded with the happy shrieks of Kailee who was jumping up and down on one of the giant king sized beds in one of the three other rooms. The walls were white, the carpet was fluffy and the couch in the middle of the room faced a big screen TV and a balcony was straight ahead that looked out over the Hollywood hills. The bathroom looked like Harry’s and mine put together and in the two other rooms there were two more king sized beds with gold quilts. Honestly I thought I was in heaven. It looked like it.

Payton ran forward and I shut the door behind me. “It has a mini fridge!” she cried before jumping up and down and screaming even more.

“The pillows are so fluffy!” Kailee yelled, bounding off the bed and giving me a giant hug. “Yes! Girls vacation was just what we needed hmm?”

I looked around in awe. Everything was beautiful. This was too much. The happiness, the craziness, the way that I was genuinely smiling for the first time in almost fifteen days. This was what I needed. “Oh yes. I needed this.” I smiled at both of them while Payton fiddled with the stereo system. She pressed play and I smiled even bigger.

“Let’s make this vacation even better then.” She started to dance and I did too, Kailee joining in at some point. The song Summer Girl by Leighton Meester blasting through the stereo system pulsed through my veins. I danced with Payton like we used to, hands linked and twirling each other. I really liked this. I didn’t want it to end, and when my phone buzzed and Harry’s face appeared again I didn’t bother to answer. I was carefree, I was happy; I was going to have fun. I hoped that the fun would last and nothing would ruin it. But then again with me something had to go wrong, I just didn’t know when, where, or why. I just didn’t want it to have to do with Harry even though it most likely would.

Chapter Twenty (Harry)

So to say I was worrying about Charlie and this whole Ashley situation was an understatement. I honestly deserved the understatement of the year award. Ashley was acting… odd to say the least. She was somewhat clingy lately. Not the “get away from me this is creepy” kind of clingy the “I have a girlfriend and you know that and you need to respect that” kind of clingy. I wasn’t at all worried to say because I had made it plenty clear that I loved Charlie and that she was my girlfriend and nothing could change that but I guess I was worried still. If that made any sense. I wasn’t worried but I was worried? Whatever. Girls were confusing. I rather did like Ashley’s company when we were with the guys and Valeria and Sara but when it was just the two of us it was… odd. She sat almost uncomfortably close to me and brought up somewhat touchy subjects that involved Charlie and when she would ask about dates that Charlie and I went on she would almost always add “I wish I could do that with someone” to the end of it. Most girls would say that and interviewers did say the same thing but the way she would say it with an adoring look in her eyes made it nerve-racking. I had finally gone to the guys to figure out what to do and leave it to them not to have a plan of action.

“Something is going on. I don’t like where it’s going and I have no clue what to do.” I ranted to the guys after waking them all up around 4:30 in the morning and ordering them to Louis and I’s room. Louis didn’t want to wake up so I walked down the hallway, got a bucket of ice and dumped it over him. He just happened to be sleeping without a shirt on and let’s just say he woke up pretty fast after using some very colorful language.

Niall - who happened to be eating something he ordered from room service - was not half asleep so he could answer somewhat coherently. “Maybe you should set her straight and tell her that you’re taken and she needs to respect that.”

I rolled my eyes at him.  I knew that for a while and was making it plenty clear. It was hard to just tell a girl straight up “hey I have a girlfriend so take a hint and find someone else.” All I needed was the title of “typical British asshole” hanging over my head. “I have tried that but bringing up my girlfriend and telling her how much I love her is not helping at all. And I don’t want to be a dink towards her.”

“Don’t you mean dick?” Zayn asked sleepily before grabbing one of the many pillows off the bed and leaning against Liam who leaned back against him. They were doing pretty well when it came to girls. Valeria and Sara both made them really happy and they were the sweetest girls on the planet. They both had their personalities and were both quite fantastic. I didn’t really pay too much attention to them at the moment though because I was still worrying about whatever was going on. I made my thoughts travel back to the topic I was supposed to be concentrating on and remembered Zayn had said something.

“No, I like the word dink better. Charlie taught it to me.” I could remember the first time she actually said that to me. She had burst out laughing and I did too and said the same thing that Zayn just said. It was quite humorous. “The point is I just need to figure out what to do.”

“It’s four in the morning can’t you wait until were rested and not half asleep to think rationally?” Liam complained. Zayn was sleeping on his shoulder and starting to drool so he stood up and moved his hair around making Zayn flop backwards ultimately waking him up. “You’ll be seeing Charlie in eleven days so you have nothing to be worried about. You will go back to London and be with her and that will be the end of whatever Ashley thinks you have.” He slumped to the door, Zayn in tow and exited along with Niall. Louis shrugged, whispered goodnight and then went back to dreamland.

That was last night and I was hoping they were right. I was now worrying more than ever but had been told repeatedly by my mum – who I had called as a last resort – that if I didn’t worry nothing would happen but if I worried something would happen. Then there was this whole thing with Charlie too. She was on vacation and well… happy. She was bursting with joy, asking me to call her back later, not returning my texts ASAP and I had seen some pictures online of her going shopping with Payton, grinning widely and waving, winking and smiling. It was not that I wanted her weeping all the time and going mad without me but seeing her happy was different. I hadn’t seen her happy since she was with me. Seeing her happy without me well… it made me want to be the reason behind that smile.

The morning came and went. I had gone out with Liam, Valeria, Zayn, and Sara and we were just heading back to the hotel for a swim. Sara was leaning into Zayn and Liam and Valeria were holding hands sweetly. I was paranoidly staring at my phone because some pictures had been posted from a party last night and… “IS THAT CHARLIE?” I shouted at the top of my lungs making Sara jump and Liam clutch his chest. There was a photo of a curvy girl with long straight blonde hair and bright blue eyes climbing onto the back of a motorcycle. She was in a rather short black American Apparel dress with brightly colored sequined six inch high heels. My eyes searched the photo for proof that it was Charlie and there it was. Her Tiffany bracelet that I had bought her for Christmas hung on her left wrist. To my surprise the guy looked suspiciously like Steven R. McQueen; actor that she fancied quite a bit. (I had found about fifty photos saved on her laptop of him under three files labelled “Stop, do not continue, and blame God for making this boy so perfect.”) I wasn’t about to think about that though. Liam and Zayn loomed over my shoulder and I continued to scroll down the article.

 It read: Charleese Everratt; girlfriend of heartthrob Harry Styles seen leaving a party while on a much needed vacation on the back of a motorbike with unknown male. Is she moving on from Harry or was she too wasted to know what she was doing? The under aged girl seemed pretty tipsy in the party a source says and another source claims she was getting revenge on Harry for the photos with the unknown blonde girl.

Unknown male? “Unknown male?”  I shouted. “I want to know where she was and what she was doing and…” my mind began to wander about what could have happened if she was tipsy. Did she go home with the guy? Did they do things that even she and I have never done. All of a sudden I felt sick and sat down on a nearby bench.

Valeria put a reassuring hand on my shoulder, her dark eyes meeting mine and she smiled sweetly. I really hoped her and Liam got together. They were so good together. “Look.” She held up her phone where she had a photo from about fifteen minutes ago up. Charlie had her hair up in a messy bun and her “Marry Me Harry” sweater on with a pair of short shorts and sunglasses. The caption read: Giving Harry hints hmm, definitely one of the strongest celebrity couples out there right now. After photos from a party last night looks like them two are doing just fine. She doesn’t look hung-over at all and it seems the Canadian beauty just misses her beau. Valeria saw that I had read it and my muscles loosened a bit. “See you have nothing to worry about, now don’t be all jealous that she went out and got crazy, I bet she is still going crazy without you but hiding it inside.”

Sara sat down on my other side. “I bet ten dollars that she will call saying how scared she was about the photos and that they mean nothing and she misses you.”

“Things are just going to be fine okay?” Zayn said reassuring from where he was kneeling beside the bench.

“Yeah, it’s Charlie. She’s harmless, what is she going to do?” Liam added.

I nodded and stood up. They were right. It was Charlie. She could be crazy once in a while but at the same time it hurt. I thought she loved me. I knew she loved me but for some reason my heart ached to see her with the other guy. I just wanted her back. That was all. I wanted her. End of story. My phone flashed Charlie’s picture and I hit answer right away.

“Charlie?” I squeaked. That was odd. My voice hadn’t cracked in a long time. Zayn and Liam burst out laughing and I turned a color that put red to shame.

“Harry I am so sorry about that picture I was being stupid and dumb and I wasn’t drunk and I just want you back and honestly I don’t know what to do and I am babbling like an idiot and I don’t care because I miss you, I want you back, I need you back and I just can’t take this much longer…” she kept talking and I kept listening. This time it was different. There was just something different about this conversation. I looked up and I could clearly see why. Ashley was standing three feet away with a smirk on her face like I had never seen before. Clearly something was going on and even though I had made it clear that I loved my girlfriend and nothing could change that; something was ought to happen whether I worried or not. And the understatement of the year award goes to – Harry flipping Styles.

Chapter Twenty-One (Charleese)

Lazy days on vacation were the best. Today was one of those days. I had gone out for a brief walk to clear my head of last night’s events and to talk to Harry alone. I got up bright and early and went out walking. Well for me nine in the morning was bright and early and especially after last night’s events… that was really early. I dug through my suitcase and found a pair of shorts, my “Marry me Harry” sweater and slung my hair into a messy bun. I would have left without a pair of shoes if I didn’t see my white Abercrombie and Fitch flip-flops beside the closet by the door. Then I left. Kailee and Payton were still snoring and I wanted nothing more than to do damage control with Harry. Especially since there were pictures floating around everywhere after the three of us girls went to a party.

We had met a few guys at the pool and they had been really nice and sweet and said “hey were having a party later you should come.” So we thought what they hay let’s go. What could happen? Well I wished I didn’t go at all. I didn’t at all listen to Liam and had about five glasses of champagne. I wasn’t drunk per say I was just out of it. Kailee and Payton were sober and were dancing like fools on the dance floor and pretty much left me to myself. One of the guys we had met at the pool had found me outside and asked if I wanted to go for a ride. Since I wasn’t coherent I had been stupid. Tromped outside in my high heels and short black dress that Kailee had told me to wear and got on the motorbike with the guy who looked somewhat like Steven R. McQueen and drove away. Then when I had got back to the hotel thinking that Kailee and Payton were still out they were already there waiting to yell at me.

“Where have you been?! We are in LA for God sakes! You cannot just run about and get on motorbikes with men that look like that guy from Vampire Diaries that you adore!” Kailee had yelled at me.

“And the pictures! They are everywhere! Harry is going to – excuse my language – flip shit!”

Payton never swore at me. Never ever ever in our friendship had she ever sworn at me. To hear that from her was like a bullet ripping through me. My heart was pounding, my head hurt, and all I wanted to do was sleep. I had stripped down and went straight to bed. I had caused so much damage it wasn’t funny. Well to me I had started a war. And I had forced myself to tell myself that what I just stated was what happened even though it wasn’t as simple as that. I knew the guy’s name, he had more than just asked me if I wanted a ride, and his number was in my phone.

 We hadn’t done anything bad exactly. We talked and I had told him things about what I was worried about that I hadn’t even told Payton who was my best friend. He was a complete stranger and I had felt more comfortable talking to him about my problems than I had with my own best friend. That was part of the reason that I was so upset. The other reason was that he had told me that if two people love each other enough they will go back to each other. I had asked him if he watched Gossip Girl because Blair said that to Chuck in an episode and he told me he was just a guy from Australia that knew a lot about girls and their problems. I had almost forgotten that he had an accent because I was so used to hearing Harry’s all the time. He dropped me off and told me that he would be leaving the next day and that I would most likely never see him again but oddly I was okay with that. He had made me feel like things might be okay. And then I woke up in the morning, saw all the pictures and fell back down to where I was waiting for everything to fall apart. Kailee and Payton had told me about them when I got back but I wasn’t fazed at all at that time. When I saw the pictures I knew that it would make me look bad and that Harry would get the wrong idea. But when he answered the phone and his voice cracked I broke down completely. He tried to keep me together on the other end but I was having trouble not letting it slip that I was in LA and we could see each other in four short days instead of ten.

Coldplay was blasting through the hotel room when I had got back from my walk. It was one of my favorite songs too; Charlie Brown. Harry rather enjoyed it too so it was one of those songs that was like “our song.” Payton and Kailee were up and Payton met my eyes when she walked into the room. Her eyes said it all. Big, brown, and sincere.

“I’m sorry, forgive me, I didn’t mean to cuss at you, I love you, things with you and Harry are going to be fine, four days til’ we see them and I am so sorry for over reacting.” Payton sobbed to me as she hugged me tightly. “I can’t believe I was so mean to you last night. I was a pot calling a kettle black because I wasn’t the only one being silly with a guy and that Aussi guy was so nice and oh my goodness I am just so sorry.”

Whenever Payton and I had fights they almost always ended like this. One of us breaking down. We would fight and then like two hours later we were okay with each other. It was just how it worked with us. I hugged her back and squeezed her tight. “It’s no big deal. I just…” Now it was my time to sob. I knew I could tell her what I told the Aussi guy last night.  “I want to be okay. I want to be okay with Harry being away but I see him with her and at first I was okay and I brushed it off but now I am a mess. I just can’t live without him. I need him like my heart needs a beat and when he’s gone I just can’t manage and you know that and I want to just be okay and be normal like I was the first day we were here. I didn’t have a care in the world and you know what? Now I am going insane. I don’t know what to do anymore. I am rambling like an idiot and I a probably suffocating you by hugging you this much and your bra just vibrated.”

Payton pulled back, flushed lightly and grabbed her phone out of her bra. Even though I had to ramble like an idiot I felt better after saying that. I had told her everything that I had told the guy last night and I had to admit; it took me a long time to even admit it to myself. I knew though that I wouldn’t be okay until I was back in Harry’s arms, with him holding me tight and making math jokes with me about how if you subtract pi you end up with a tart.

“Oh hi Niall!” Payton said brightly. “Harry’s okay?” she said right away before taking a seat on the bed.  She nodded at me for a moment; her brown eyes now back to being carefree and taking on the shine that they got when she talked to Niall. “Good to know…” she continued to talk to Niall so I decided to leave the room. I needed to apologize to Kailee yet too.

I walked into Kailee’s room and she hugged me instantly before going back to her laptop. Her brown hair was in a messy bun and her eyes shined much like Payton’s were. Seemed like everyone was talking to their boyfriends at the moment accept for me.

“Harry is out with that girl he met in Canada, she wanted to go dress shopping.” Louis said despite the frantic efforts of Kailee shaking her head to stop him from saying anything. Louis must have seen her face and he continued. “Oh, Charlie is there? I would love to see that girls face, she has such nice skin. Charlie come here!” Louis called.

My heart sunk slightly. He was out with that girl. Doing the thing that he liked doing with me. He loved going dress shopping with me.  I always ended up buying the dresses that he picked out for me and I was sure my closet had about thirty new additions since we got together. I was still a bit upset but I went around to see the laptop anyways and Louis was smiling silly and wearing his traditional stripes. “Hi Lou.” I sighed and shrugged. Kailee motioned for me to sit but she and Louis probably needed to talk on their own.

“Now you should know that Harry loves you dearly and that you make him happy. Please do not make a habit of getting on good looking lads motorcycles and driving away. Then I think Harry will buy one but we know he would look ridiculous on a motor bike don’t you think?” he pointed to me and I nodded.

The thought of Harry on a motorcycle secretly made my heart pound although he would most likely look like a die-hard trying to look hard with leather and all that but I didn’t care he was always going to make my heart pound even though he was thousands of miles away. What Louis said did reassure me though and I was glad he had told me. “Thanks’ Lou, that means a lot. Now I think I am going to work on my tan.” I really thought that the couples needed to be together and come to think of it I kinda wanted to have some bonding time with my music. I had You Are Loved by Josh Groban stuck in my head and I really wanted to play his music.

“No no! Please stay! We can all talk together!” Kailee protested and I hugged her lightly and waved to Louis.

“You know what I think you two need some time together.” I smiled before walking out to see Payton on Skype with Niall.

“So I can’t wait to see you and have some whipped cream again, maybe some caramel too?” Niall said from the computer.

Payton saw me and turned a color that put red to shame. I put on a mortified face and went to my room to get changed. Those two really were addicted to food if they had naked fun with it too.  I changed quickly and walked out and waved to Payton who was engrossed in whatever Niall was saying. I think it was sexual because I heard the words “lick” and “your body” in the same sentence and decided not to think about it too much. As I left the hotel room I noticed I had a missed text. It was a simple one from Harry with a picture but it still meant a lot to me. All I could think about was how much he meant to me and I hoped that nothing would happen that could jeopardize our relationship. The picture was of a simple cream colored lace dress hanging on a hanger. The text that made my chest heat up read:

Bought this for you my love.

Can’t wait for you to wear it. xxx H. <3

Ps. Love you to the moon and back.

Chapter Twenty-Two (Harry)

I could not wait to get to LA, get to the hotel, and then go to the pool. All I wanted to do was get there and be in the heat and know I was only six days away from seeing Charlie. For some reason she herself was rather cheery. She was giggling on the phone, said that she was doing just fine and her tan looked amazing. Compared to the last time when she called me she was freaking out and was upset about how much longer she could go without me it was a little different for me. Rumors had blown up after she was seen with that guy on a motor bike who happened to be some Australian oil kings son named Everatt Roth. There was the theory that we had broken up, the one that she was drunk, and then the one about how we both had serious drug addiction problems so she had become a prostitute to make money. That was totally spot on wasn’t it? Anyways we were in a good place I guess and as I talked to her on the phone before we were leaving on the plane she sounded quite smitten.

“You are going to love LA! It is nice and hot there and I hear the mattresses in the hotels are fantastic so it should be good for your poor posture.” She teased in her bright sounding voice. I could just see her with her bright blue eyes and her blonde hair, sitting at work and folding underwear like she always did. God I missed her so much, and I was so happy I only had to wait another six days.

“I have been there before you know, and I'm sure a firm mattress will be good for my posture. You know what else it is good for love?” I teased back, flipping my hair around as Niall, Louis, Liam, Zayn, Valeria, Sara and Ashley approached where I was sitting at the gate. The girls were coming along with us as Sara and Zayn and Liam and Valeria were pretty much dating but they hadn’t really made it official or anything. It was pretty clear though because they were holding hands, smiling and giggling with each other. I really felt bad for Ashley though. She was more or less third wheeling with them and I really felt bad that she was going to be alone most of the time when we were in LA. She wouldn’t have a lot of girl’s time with Valeria and Sara being with Zayn and Liam all the time. I would have suggested she not come but that would have been somewhat rude on my part and I was pretty sure I had gotten her to realize that she would one day find someone that cares for her as much as I care for Charlie.

Charlie erupted into a fit of giggles and if I was sitting by her she most likely would have hit me for making that suggestion about beds and mattresses but she was used to it most of the time. “Now now Harry, you know you have to wait a while for that.” she scolded which was very unconvincing seeing as she was still laughing and also seemed to have gotten the hiccups.

There was a brief announcement that we were to be boarding to LA so I stood up and grabbed my carryon. “I will call you as soon as I get to the hotel in LA okay love? Then we can Skype? I bought you a I love NY shirt today and I would love to show you.” I told her quickly.

“Okay, see you soon Harry, Love you.” she replied with a hiccup which made me chuckle.

I nodded and smiled up at the guys who were waving me to walk to the gate. “Love you to love and please have a drink of water to get rid of those hiccups.”

She giggled again and I could hear her nod and take a drink of something. “Love you Harry.” She stated before the line went dead and I put my phone in my pocket. Even when our conversations were short – which they pretty much never were – they were always sweet and meaningful. No matter what we talked about. We even talked about how her grade twelve math teacher looked exactly like Niall would in the next ten years all the way down to the skinny legs, polo’s, and left handedness. That was quite the conversation right there and we had a good laugh over it. I think that was one of the things that I missed most about her; our silly conversations and how her and I could just be with each other and not have to do any of those other things that couples did. We just needed each other and that was all that mattered.

“I guess we are sitting next to each other on the plane Harry.” Ashley’s voice rang in from somewhere and I had to shake myself out of the thoughts that I was having about Charlie to realize she was talking to me. She had a beanie on with short jean shorts and a black jean jacket and tank top. It was going to be 25°C in LA when we got there but it was a bit chilly to be in shorts here because it was -5°C here in NYC. She didn’t look fazed at all though. She smiled up at me, her blonde hair curled perfectly and it didn’t seem to move when she turned her head. It made me think about how when Charlie curled her hair she said it was bipolar and that it would be straight in three hours. Most of the time it did straighten out anyways but I quickly realized I needed to respond to Ashley and pushed my thoughts of Charlie in the back of my mind again.

“Oh really? Okay well I am going to sleep right after takeoff. I am rather exhausted.” I replied and stepped forward so the flight attendant to scan my ticket. She scanned it quickly and I walked down the tunnel. Ashley was very eager and was walking quickly behind me.

“You excited to see Charlie in six days? And I knew that you are exhausted you were on the phone with her last night for almost three hours.” she said, bumping into my shoulder just as Louis looked back at me and smiled before giving me a warning look. He had been doing this lately because he thought Ashley was going to do something stupid. I didn’t think she would because I had set her straight a few days ago and told her that Charlie and I were going strong and nothing could ever change that.

“Yes I am.” I told her, quickening my pace so I could sit down and sleep and maybe not have to talk to her. If it was one thing I disliked about her was how she talked so much. This girl honestly couldn’t be quiet. “And what were you doing? Up all night listening to me snoring?” I chuckled quietly and glanced at her. She kept a straight face and flushed slightly. “Oh you were.”

She looked at her feet since we had to stop before we could get on the plane. “I couldn’t sleep. I was too excited to be going to LA. I have never been.” Her cheeks were rosy and she had a bashful look on her face.

I smiled at her and shrugged. “I felt the same way when I first went.” The line moved forward and I walked to my seat. Sure enough I was going to be in the middle with Ashley by the window and Louis on my other side. That was a relief. I didn’t want to sit next to someone that I didn’t know because I had a habit of drooling when I slept on airplanes. I wouldn’t drool when I was in a bed with a pillow but on a plane I would. We settled in – Ashley glued to the window like a kid that had never been on an airplane before - and I was just about to fall asleep when I noticed one of the inflight movies was A Cinderella Story which happened to be Charlie’s all-time favorite movie. We had watched it together about five times and it never got old. She cried at all the same parts, laughed at all the funny ones, and said about fifteen times each movie how much she adored and thought Hilary Duff was pretty. Louis saw what I was looking at and gave me a knowing smile.

“Eh mate you get to see your Cinderella in six days, maybe it’s time you get your prince charming on?” he joked before swiping his credit card to pay for the movie without me asking. I patted Louis on the shoulder before I settled into the movie with a big fat smile on my face, thinking of how happy Charlie would be when I told her I watched her favorite movie and dreaming of how she was my Cinderella and I was her prince charming.

_______________________________

“It is so hot!” Ashley exclaimed, running ahead of all of us like a kid in a candy store and waving over the cab so we could head to The W where we were staying for the six days. I had texted Charlie a few moments ago to tell her that we had arrived and she had texted back saying that she had gone shopping but would be back in about half an hour. I was okay with that because that would give me time to get to the hotel and shower. I needed one since the flight had been hot and stuffy because the AC had broken in the plane. I had watched A Cinderella Story all the way through and then fell asleep quickly after that before Ashley could strike up a conversation with me. She was pretty chatty all the time and there was something going on with her. I didn’t pay too much attention to it once I was asleep because I had a strange dream about working at Subway and I was well… asleep. The cab pulled up and Ashley pulled me by the arm into it, Louis jammed into the back with us and Ashley had the biggest smile on her face ever. “OMG! I can’t believe I am here! It is like a dream come true!” she shouted.

Louis smirked and stifled a laugh before crossing his arms and pulling out his phone to text Kailee that we had arrived. “I think I am going to the pool when we get to the hotel.” Louis thought allowed while typing on his phone. “Care to join me?”

“Maybe.” I answered quickly. I really just wanted to go back and talk to Charlie but maybe some time at the pool would be good.

“I would love to!” Ashley replied too before receiving a look from Louis that read “I was talking to Harry not you.” She crossed her arms over her chest and stared out the window again before speaking. “Harry are you and I going to have adventure while we are here?”

I stared at her. She said it in her tone that she used when she was talking bitterly about Charlie. I really didn’t know what to say or how to reply so I found a stupid answer. “Whatever LA brings, LA brings I guess.”

She didn’t say anything after that and Louis was texting me from right beside me which he only did when he didn’t want someone else to know something.

Watch it Harry.

Hidden agenda at two o’clock.

I had quickly replied to him and he chuckled a bit causing Ashley to look at what we were doing but she quickly looked away again. Yup. Something going on. But I was not about to admit that Louis was right again. Things with Ashley had been good. Until now. Okay no. They were still fine. I was not going to think about. Nope, not at all.

It is three in the afternoon so that

is not possible. ;)

Because it was so late in the afternoon there was a ton of traffic and it was taking forever to get to The W. It was fine though because Charlie said she was running late too. Something about buying the perfect outfit for today. I didn’t understand why she needed the perfect outfit so I shook it off. I was getting slightly anxious though. I had no reason to be anxious or nervous but I was. My hands were clammy and I was overwhelmed with the temperature in the cab. I wanted to jump out the window. When we finally got to the hotel I more or less beetled it into the hotel, checked in and ran to my room to put some water on my face. Louis came into the room sometime later and crossed his arms at me.

“Calm down. You are freaking out for no reason at all.”

I stared at him. Why was I freaking out anyways? What did I have to freak out about today? I was more or less on vacation. I was going to see my girlfriend in six days and the other girl wasn’t doing anything stupid. I was just fine. “I don’t even know Louis. I am seeing Charlie in six days and maybe I am freaking out early? I don’t know. Things just feel odd at the moment.”

That had to be it. When we were in the cab I thought the most about that. About how I was going to see her and how I wasn’t sure how I was going to give her the thing I had to give her. It felt like it was burning a hole in my pocket and I was slightly afraid that she would get scared about it. No. She would love it. She would. Okay. Calm down Harry. My mind was going a mile a minute and I wanted nothing more than to calm down. I took a deep breath and looked at Louis who nodded and looked at me like he knew what exactly was going on. He always did with me.

“Things will be fine okay, nothing is going to happen. I am sorry for freaking you out.” He walked over and patted my knee. “Things are just fine okay, everything is just going really fast that’s all.”

That made sense. It was. Everything was moving insanely fast for whatever reason and it was nuts. I was about to reply when there was a knock at the door and Ashley came in eagerly. She had ditched the coat and beanie and her hair was still in perfect ringlets. There was fire in her eyes though. Like when you are going to do something stupid and you can’t hide it.

“Wanna get some fresh air Harry? I need a breath. I am freaking out for some reason.” She asked somewhat nervously with a shy smile. Maybe fresh air was what I needed.

“Sure.” I nodded before walking to the door. “Oh and Louis if Charlie Skype’s can you tell her I will be right back?”

Louis nodded. “Oh yea, no problem. You know I love your princess.”

Without another word I left in the elevator with Ashley and she hit the button to the lobby. She was rubbing her arms with her hands and seemed to almost be shaking. My pulse had now come down to normal and I wasn’t sweaty like I was a few moments ago. The elevator was eerily quiet as the floors ticked down and we didn’t speak til we were almost at the ground floor.

“Harry can I do something stupid?”

When I turned to her to ask her what she meant she quickly put her hands on my shoulders, leaned up and kissed me. She kissed me. Her lips were touching mine. The lips of which belonged to Charlie. This felt so wrong it wasn’t funny. What was happening? Did the world end? I think so. She held the kiss and I grabbed her arms to try to push her away but she was stronger than she looked. What was going on? No wonder I was freaking out. It was so wrong. I didn’t even notice the elevator doors open. I was too busy thinking about how wrong this was.

“Harry?” I heard a voice filled with hurt, shock, and surprise say from the elevators open doors.

I knew the voice; I knew who was standing there without looking. Ashley looked up at me with an adoring look in her eyes and I stared at who was standing in the doorway. Blonde hair, blue eyes as deep as the sea, legs that went on for days and a smile that made my heart melt. That smile was not there anymore though. She stared blankly at me and I couldn’t say anything. I didn’t know what to say anyways. Charlie was standing right in front of me, the girl that I loved more than anything in the world. Yup. The world had definitely just ended.

Chapter Twenty-Three (Charleese)

I didn’t know how to feel. I think all the nerves in my body just magically froze and the world stopped and the clocks stopped working and someone hit the pause button that was known as my life. Was this happening? Did what I just see happen or was I dreaming? I had to be dreaming. I did not just see the elevator doors open and see Harry kissing that Ashley girl. I did not see the way her hands were on his shoulders and I did not see his hands on her arms. I didn’t see anything and this wasn’t happening. Today was supposed to be perfect. It had started perfectly and it was supposed to be that way. Payton had found out yesterday that we were staying at the same hotel as them and I was overjoyed because I had dreamt up the perfect plan. Harry and I were supposed to Skype and I would ask him what floor of the hotel he was on and what his room number was. If he asked why I would say “cause I wanna know if it is my favorite number” and he would tell me. Then I would go, go up to his hotel room and knock on the door. He would answer, I would be standing there and we would be reunited. It was just supposed to be that way.  What I was looking at now was not part of the plan. I started to think of what happened and everything seemed to be fine.

We had gone shopping before Harry and the guys were to arrive because we all wanted new outfits to wear with our wonderful tans and also because we hadn’t been shopping yet. We had to practically drag Kailee out of Macy’s because she had found so many things to buy and after that I had to yank Payton out of Cotton On because she would have bought the whole store. They had six or seven shopping bags each and I didn’t have any.

“Come on Charlie! You have to get something! Mind you Harry would love you in nothing.” Kailee joked while we walked through the mall. I had gone in to six or seven stores and had yet to find anything. I think I was just nervous because I hadn’t seen Harry for almost a month and I wasn’t sure if his heart would still race like he said it did when he saw me. I knew mine would but I was skeptical for him.

“We are going in here! It was your favorite store at home!” Payton said pointing to the Aerie store. She latched her hand around my wrist and pulled me into the store.

I could have lived in the store most of the time. I loved it. Underwear, clothes, athletic wear, jeans, and accessories.  I spent half my pay cheque in here whenever I got it. It had been months since I had been in one and it felt homey to be in it. When I thought about being homey I thought of Harry. The boy that kept me grounded and was able to make me feel like London was my home when I was there. He made me want to either pull my hair out or rip my clothes off. And he also made me realize that I was beautiful and that I was able to be loved by someone. It was at that moment that the outfit I was going to wear pretty much jumped out at me. A cream colored strapless patterned shirt, a pair of jean shorts with a braided belt, the leather sandals I had seen earlier and my bright smile that I had plastered on my face. It was perfect. So perfect that I had bought everything went to the washroom and put it on because Harry had arrived and I was off to go see him.

I had walked into the lobby with a huge smile on my face. The doorman had said hello to me and I nodded and waved to him. I pretty much sprinted to the elevator and Payton and Kailee hung back to pay him since I didn’t even do that. I was just that excited that I had the blood pulsing in my veins and a spring in my step. I swear I didn’t even sleep the night before. It was that exciting for me. I pressed the button for the elevator to go up to my room to Skype Harry and put the plan into action but of course I had to wait. I flipped my hair back and heard the door ding. I was about to step in when the world ended and everything happened. I saw what I saw and that was the end.

There was so much more to what happened than I had just thought about but I couldn’t start thinking of the exact other things that happened like Payton buying a jar of chocolate sauce and Kailee buying a striped bikini. I was too busy trying to figure out what I did wrong to cause what had happened to happen.

“Harry?” I said shocked again. I had said it before and he hadn’t said anything at all. I didn’t even want to look at the girl because I could tell already that she was beautiful and gorgeous and that I looked like a deformed potato to compared to her. I did look at her finally when she spoke.

“Oh my God.” Was all she could say, her hands still on Harry’s shoulders. Her eyes were icy blue and her hair was perfectly curled and a lighter blonde than mine was. She was gorgeous. About two inches shorter than me and about thirty pounds lighter. She stared back at me and didn’t even bother to say anything more or remove her hands off my boyfriend.

It took a moment for my emotions to click in and my eyes to fill with tears and my chest fill with pain. But when it did it hurt so bad I wanted to crumple into a heap on the floor. This was where I was now. Breaking down and I didn’t know what to do.

“Charlie look who I ran into outside?” Payton chimed from behind me from where Niall was giving her a piggyback towards me. She took one look at me and then at Harry and the girl and her bright smile from seeing Niall again disappeared and Niall’s slowly faded too.

I turned away and met Harry’s green eyes. I didn’t even look at them before but when I did I felt my heart hit the marble floor beneath my feet. They were the same bright green eyes that I had fallen in love with and they were the same ones that had just broken my heart.

“Charlie, I didn’t do this, this was not my fault, Charlie please…” he rambled out at once before shaking Ashley off and reaching a hand out for me.

I stepped back and wiped the tears from my face, my fingers reaching for the strings on my bracelet that he made me for Valentine’s Day. I honestly didn’t know what to say and my mind was going a mile a minute. How was I supposed to reply to that? I had no clue. What did come out of my mouth was what I was afraid of from the beginning. “I knew this would happen, I knew you would find someone else.”

Harry shook his head and stepped fully out of the elevator and reached for me again. “Charlie please just listen.” He said. His eyes were pleading with me now but I was not going to stay around and hear him say that it meant nothing and that he cared for me the whole time because that was obviously BS. What I had just seen was proof that it would just be a load of BS.

I had finally gotten the strings undone and I yanked the bracelet free. I took one look at it again, reading the Forever & Always before tossing it to his feet. “No Harry, I don’t want to.” Without another word I turned on my heel and ran for wherever. Ran from the girl that was going to replace me, ran from my best friend who was shouting my name and most of all; ran from the love of my life that had just broken my heart.

______________________________

At some point I stopped crying. I really didn’t remember when that was. I found myself at the hotel pool with my legs dangling into the water. It was dark out now and the moon was out, the stars shining bright above.  If the incident didn’t happen Harry and I would have been out her together watching the stars and talking. I didn’t know where he was. I could care less where he was. I was just so upset that I was stupid to believe that he would have stayed faithful, stayed loving me and return to me without a problem. I laughed at it now. To believe that someone like him could actually love me? Really? It was the greatest joke ever to think that. I deserved an award to be able to kid myself for five months. Maybe I was being really bitter but it was just the way that I was feeling right now.

No one else was at the pool. It was actually closed and no one was supposed to be here but that didn’t stop me. The personnel at the hotel quite liked me so I think that was why the lifeguard – who was really cute – let me stay. I didn’t want to go back to my room. I didn’t even want to be here. I didn’t want to face my problem, I didn’t want to face my best friend and have her put me back together. She had done it enough already and really didn’t need to put me back together again. I knew that was what friends were for but I didn’t want to be a burden on her when she had no problems, was flawless and perfect in every way possible. Speaking of Payton, she had sat down beside me and smiled her “I know you are hurt but things will work out” smile. She wrapped her arm around my shoulders and pulled me into her side.

“So Niall was really happy to see all of us again. He asked if you brought any baked goods with you.” she said lightly before placing her feet in the blue water of the pool.

I stared at the water. I could feel the tears coming to my eyes and my face getting hot. Payton simply pulled my tighter into her side and hugged me more. “I just don’t know what to do Payton. I want to talk to him but at the same time I want nothing to do with him at all. I just don’t know what is happening anymore.”

She patted my head after I got my words out which came out sounding like mush since I was balling my eyes out. “Everything works out, we can stay here for a while, you can ignore my stickiness and pretend that you don’t know what Niall and I just did and just be each other’s best friends for the time being. Sound good? If you don’t like it too bad. By the way we don’t need to talk about it if you don’t want too.”

I had to chuckle, and I managed to smile for a bit. I really didn’t want to talk about it and I knew that she wasn’t going to force me to which was nice. “Okay.” I breathed. “And I didn’t notice your stickiness til now. You and Niall really need to shower after you do that kinky stuff.”

“Showering is you and Harry’s thing.” She giggled and then realized what she said and shook it off. “Forget I said anything, let’s just be us.”

___________________________________

After a whole entire box of tissues later the moon was right over head and Niall came out to get Payton. He gave me a sympathetic smile and helped both of us up. He took Payton’s hand and my chest felt warm. I was so happy that my best friend had found such a great boyfriend to be with. Especially one that cared so much for her and didn’t cheat on her with some girl he had known for two weeks. I tried to tell myself that it was just a kiss and meant nothing but I didn’t believe that. I thought it meant something. It meant that he had met someone better than I was and that I was just nothing to him. It made my heart hurt to think like I was but what was I supposed to do.

“So erm… Payton is staying in my room tonight and Kailee is with Lou so you are on your own.” Niall told me with a reassuring pat on the back. “And you should know that Harry loves you more than anything and he never meant to hurt you.”

I shook my head and made my way to the elevator. “You know Niall I would love to believe you but for me to believe that he loves me would be lying to myself when I know I am not lovable at all.”

Payton burst in with a finger pointed at me. “Nnnnnnnno no no no. You are the most loveable person on this earth and you cannot think that way.” She flipped her hair over her shoulder which hit Niall in the face causing him to laugh. I walked away because she started laughing and was not about to stop being ridiculous and serious for me.

“Goodnight Payton! Even though I know you will not be sleeping.” I mumbled and got into the awaiting elevator and went up to my floor. I ripped off my sandals and would have probably stripped down to my underwear if I was able to but I didn’t. I wondered down the hall and shoved my key card into the door. When I got into the room all the lights were off and I flicked on one of the table lamps before going into the room where my bed was. I assumed no one was in here since Kailee and Payton were with their boyfriend but when I got in there Harry was sitting on the bed, his eyes twinkling in the minimal light.

“Hi Charlie.” He said simply to me with a weak smile. 

I froze. I didn’t know what to do. What was I supposed to do? He just broke my heart; I had just decided that we were done and that I didn’t want to talk about it even though that would have been hard considering we lived right next to each other in the same building. My chest began to ache and my eyes blurred. Harry simply opened his arms, ushering me into them. Did I want to go into them? Well after all the insanity of the day it couldn’t hurt right? So I did what I thought I should do; crawled into his arms and cried. Would we be able to fix this? This was in no way a solution to what went on and we were no way back together. Our relationship was on the rocks now, totally destroyed and bleeding and waiting for a transplant on the never ending transplant list. But considering everything that had ever happened to us there had to be something to salvage right?

Chapter Twenty-Four (Harry)

Charlie and I didn’t speak. We sat on her bed in each other’s arms. She was crying, her face buried into my chest. I had the girl of my dreams back in my arms but it was not the situation that I wanted. I didn’t think that our relationship would be practically on the rocks and she would be crying her eyes out and I would be feeling like the biggest idiot on the planet. I thought we would be reunited, be ecstatic and then lose all our clothes and do some things that would rob her of her innocence. I had so many questions at the moment too. Like why they had come to LA, why she didn’t tell me they were here, why she looked about ten pounds lighter. Not that I didn’t like her before it was just different that she was this thin. I just… my mind was running a marathon and I didn’t know what to do. It was going a thousand miles a minute and I had so much to say and so much to tell her and so much to explain but it wasn’t coming out. It was all in my thoughts and when I opened my mouth to say anything nothing came out. It wasn’t like that earlier. I got everything out that I needed to tell Ashley after the fallout. I got everything out but now the words were caught in my throat, I just needed to explain it to Charlie and then maybe things would come back together.

Charlie looked up at me, her blue eyes rimmed with red and her normally neat, straight, and thick blonde hair was askew. I missed the smell of her Versace Bright Crystal perfume and breathed it in as she kept her arms around me. “What happened Harry?” she asked, her voice breaking at the end. “I want to know what happened in that elevator and how you ended up here and…” she stopped and smothered herself into my chest again. I felt her breath in and then I could feel her sobbing again. It felt like my heart had fallen through the floor to where the killer rats lived. Obviously she and I had watched too many episodes of The Weekenders together but who really cared.

I breathed her scent in again. I could tell her, it wasn’t that hard because Ashley and I had talked it over and come to a mutual decision. She was somewhat upset about why she wasn’t enough but I had a reply to that and the mutual decision came about. She was understanding about it and I was glad she took it as well as she did.

_______________________________

Charlie had run down the hallway away from me. I didn’t follow her though because Payton’s hand came in contact with my face and she slapped me so hard that I saw stars. Ashley had come out of the elevator and was staring at the floor. Louis, Liam, and Zayn had come out of nowhere and wondered why Payton had just slapped me, why she was standing right there and then there was Niall who looked like he was going to punch me in the gut.

“Harry Edward Styles you freaking asshole!” Payton yelled at me, her hand raised to slap me again. “What the hell did you just do? How dare you cheat on my best friend! I should murder you on the spot and you better sleep with your eyes open tonight because I might come and hit you with a fry pan! I cannot believe you!” she continued shouting at me until Niall picked her up and slung her over his shoulder. Her fists were hitting his back and she was kicking and squirming. “Niall James Horan you may have stolen my virginity but please put me down now before I murder you too! I am not done yelling at Harry yet and I need to hit him a few times and go find Charlie!” Payton wouldn’t stop squirming so Niall started to walk away.  

“I will deal with you later.” He said unimpressed before walking away and to the stairs, Payton giving me the death glare the whole way there. I had never seen her flip out like that. She was in total disarray and just crazy. Sure I knew she was capable of doing that but I didn’t think I would see it happen.

Everyone in the lobby was standing completely still. No one was moving. Louis and Zayn and Liam all looked really confused, Ashley was staring at her feet and fiddling with her hands. I didn’t really know what to do. So much had just happened, seeing Charlie, being kissed by Ashley, Payton just slapping me and freaking out. I knew what to do but I didn’t. Did that even make sense? I didn’t care. What I thought I needed to do ran though my head and I went with my first instinct. I gave Louis a “tell you later” look, took Ashley by the arm and pulled her back into the elevator with me. We rode a few floors up before I pressed the stop button and turned to her. I had something to say to her because she looked really frightened at me and was giving me a “you are mad at me” look.

“I am not mad at you for what you did but I need to clarify some things with you.” I started. “Louis was right about you thinking my kindness was something more but don’t worry about that for now the point is I am in love with Charlie, have been since I heard her from behind the wall five months ago and nothing will ever change that.” my heart was pounding as I said that because I was praying she wouldn’t cry. I hated seeing anyone cry and if I made one more girl cry today I might breakdown myself. One was enough for me and because that one was my girlfriend I wanted to shoot myself in the foot.

Ashley looked up at me for the first time since the kiss. I really wanted to wash my lips but that would have been rude to say. “Why not me though Harry?” she questioned. “Why couldn’t I be your princess and you my prince?”

I gave her a sympathetic smile. “Ashley you deserve someone special. You deserve someone better than me. I have my princess already and I am not sure if I am her prince but I know I am not yours and you deserve everything better than me and you will find it. You might not think so now but you will find it. It takes a while but it will come around when you least expect it.”

________________________________

I had told Charlie everything. I had explained how we met, what happened, and most importantly how I had set Ashley straight. She listened to every word and I told her every possible detail about what had happened since I met her. She didn’t say anything though. She stared at me after I had finished and I smirked at her. “As for how I got in here… Payton’s room key fell out when Niall hauled her off and I might have picked it up thinking that Louis and the guys would have kicked me out of my room after what I did and I would have nowhere to stay.”

For the first time that night she smiled. Her beautiful radiant smile that light up my world and made me feel warm inside. We were sitting across from each other and I was able to see her whole face. Her eyes were less red now and I could tell that we were making headway with what was happening and it was (hopefully) getting repaired. I couldn’t lose her. I just couldn’t. “You thought that I might let you stay with me after everything if you were room less hmm?” she raised her eyebrows. “You think I forgive you after what just happened and after you left me for a month?”

At the beginning I heard the joke in her voice but at the end I could hear her seriousness. Her eyes were somewhat playful but at the same time I could see the brokenness in them. They looked like stressed shattered glass. I brought my hand up her face and brushed her cheek with it. “I don’t think I will ever forgive myself for leaving you and I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness but I love you Charlie. I have seen almost every ocean in the world and nothing compares to the color of your blue eyes and how I constantly drown in them.”

I think Charlie’s heart stopped. At least it somewhat looked like it because she gasped and her eyes filled with tears and they spilled over. “Harry…” she sighed before crossing her legs and burying her face into her hands. “What am I supposed to say to that?”

“Don’t say anything yet!” I shouted at her. She snapped her head up and looked at me somewhat confused as to what was happening. Before the moment was lost I reached into my pocket and pulled out what I had forgotten to give her for her birthday. The small velveteen box felt hot in my hands as I placed it in hers. “Go ahead, open it. It was for your birthday but I forgot to give it to you.”

She tentatively looked at the box and gave me her signature “you spent too much money on me” look but opened it anyways. I really didn’t think it was possible for her to cry anymore but the tears flowed down her face and she smiled as she picked up what was in the little box. It was a white gold infinity ring on a simple white gold chain. There was diamonds around the infinity symbol which made it more expensive than a normal ring and on the inside there was a message engraved; “always.”

I pulled out the chains around my neck and held up mine. I had a similar one but mine didn’t have the diamonds on it. It wasn’t as clean as I hadn’t taken it off at all and wore it all the time. “I have one too. I got it because I wanted you to know that you have my heart and always will. I don’t know what I would do without you and I love you more than anything in this world and…”

Without another word her lips came in contact with mine, igniting sparks between us. It was the first time we had kissed each other since I had left and to feel her lips on mine was amazing. Our fingers intertwined in each other and when she pulled back she pressed her forehead to mine. No words could describe how much I had wanted to feel those lips on mine again. “I love you too.” she said simply.

I smiled. She loved me too. I knew she did but I just couldn’t tell after what had happened. I knew I would never stop loving her. I took the necklace from her and clipped it around her neck. She looked at how it sparkled in the minimal light and I watched as her eyes sparkled too. Then she pinched me. “What was that for!” I asked her.

She laid her head on my chest and sighed. “Just making sure this moment is real. Making sure you are real and that I am really here with you.”

I took the opportunity to give her one of those kisses that we shared. The ones that you wanted to remember for the rest of your life. It quickly became more heated and her hands trailed to the hem of my shirt which flew to the floor. Her’s joined it several moments later followed by her shorts, my pants and socks and we were quickly left in our underwear. She pulled back for a moment and blushed. “You are… welcome to stay if you want…”

Charlie’s somewhat embarrassed face said it all. I knew what she was getting at and I wasn’t sure if she was ready for it. After everything that had happened today did she really want to do this? It wasn’t something that could be undone. I raised my eyebrows and pushed her hair back from her face. “Are you sure? After everything that has happened today…?”

She cut me off with a small smile. “I am sure about you.” she sighed before pressing her lips to mine and ripping back the crisp white covers.

Chapter Twenty-Five (Charleese)

The light was shining brightly through the windows and I was trying to figure out if I was in heaven or not. Had Harry and I really made up after that train wreck? Had I really gotten that beautiful late birthday gift from him? Did I just lose my virginity to him? All those questions had the same answer. And it was yes. I was still processing all the events of last night, from the words we said to what we did to if everything even really happened. I couldn’t really believe it I guess. It was a lot to process anyways. I would discuss it with Payton when I decided to get out of bed and see the world and right now that could never happen. I didn’t want to move, I wasn’t sure if I could anyways.

I really just wanted to lie here and be here with Harry. I just wanted to be with him again. And I was. I wasn’t really aware of what hour of the day it was at the moment because my phone was somewhere in a pile of clothes on the floor and the clock wasn’t visible from where my head was under one of the big fluffy pillows.  I moved my arm to the side so I could reach for Harry but all I felt was the cold side of the bed. Wait what? No. he was supposed to be here with me. He was supposed to be right beside me. Especially after last night’s events he was supposed to be right beside me. I was about to snap my head up out of bed when I felt someone on top of me on top of the covers. The first thing I noticed was the way that he smelled. Blue de Chanel. Then there was the fact that his lips were on my neck and I could feel floppy curly brown hair against my face, clearly this was not a rapist that had broken into my room.  It was Harry being his cheeky self.

“It’s just me love, I left to get some clothes from my room.” He mumbled before he continued to kiss my neck. I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy this. After not having this for a month it was an amazing feeling. Then again after last night I felt some things that I had never felt before. Those things would not be repeated and they were things that I didn’t think I was capable of feeling. I tried to shift under Harry’s weight but he wouldn’t let up at all.

“Good morning to you too.” I giggled from where my head was still buried in pillows. “Can you maybe move so I could kiss you properly or is being on top of me going to be a new habit for you?”

Harry chuckled before shifting just enough so I could roll over. “Maybe it will become a habit if you want it to be.” He said just before I was able to see his face and press my lips to his. Our eyes met and my heart skipped a beat. How did I live without those bright green sparkling eyes? They shone in the light from the windows and were bright and cheerful. They were warm and welcoming and it was almost like we had never been apart. It felt like nothing had ever happened now. Everything was put back together; the stars had aligned after everything last night. I got a strange feeling. It wasn’t easy to pinpoint and I wasn’t sure what it was but I almost felt… happy. Truly happy. Like I did when we were always together. Harry kissed my nose. “God I missed you. Never leave me again.”

I laughed. Harry pushed the hair back from around my face and pressed his lips to my forehead. “Leave you? You left me remember!”

When Harry pulled back his eyes were sympathetic and sincere. They searched mine for a moment before he kissed me sweetly. It was another one of those kisses that you never wanted to forget. Those ones that stick with you forever. Like the one he gave last night. Accept this one didn’t escalade, he just pulled back, felt under the covers for my hand and pulled it out. He placed it on his chest and held it there. I could feel it beating through his blue button up. Accept when I met his eyes it sped up several beats.

“I am never leaving you again. My heart beats for you. So when you think I am not with you, look at this.” Harry took two seconds to take out his chain to show me his ring before tucking it away. “And remember the feel of this.” He pressed my hand to his chest a little harder and its beat felt like it was pulsing through my body. Without another word he pressed his lips to mine and I felt that spark that went though me when we touched. Words could not describe how happy I was to have this boy back in my life. Harry quickly brought his lips to my ear and I could feel him smirking. “Now was it a mistake for me to put clothes on? I am starting to think it was considering the position you are in now, literally and figuratively.”

I smiled and giggled as Harry pressed himself closer to me and held me tighter. “I really need to pee Harry.” I told him. It was true, I needed to pee and also I really didn’t want to do what he was implying considering we had just done it however many hours prior. I savored the moment though. It was one of those meaningful goofy ones that I missed and I was glad to have it back.

Harry finally rolled off and raised an eyebrow. “You and your bladder.” He rolled his eyes and flopped back onto the bed beside me. “And if you shower I am joining you.” he finished with a cheeky smile. I simply hit him, which caused him to grab the pillow and hit me. From there feathers flew, lips touched and I realized that I was truly reunited with the boy that I loved.

___________________________________

“Well look who decided to make their appearance hmm.” Louis raised his eyebrows as Harry and I walked down and sat in the two empty chairs that were saved for us for our late lunch. It was around three in the afternoon and Harry decided that maybe sitting in my room all day was not such a good idea because people would be making assumptions as to what we were doing. We really didn’t do anything. We laid there and talked; just talked. Like the old times. He told me Zayn and Liam had each met girls and he talked about some of the things that he did when he was away from me. I told him what I did which was pretty much cry, work, and eat extremely fatty foods. He laughed at the last part, made a few comments about stress relief and then something about burning calories which caused me to turn a very bright shade of red and earn him a slap on the arm. Even after what happened I found it funny that we got back so quickly together. I really didn’t think it would be that simple. It didn’t seem like a simple issue to be put into but when I thought about it, it made sense. It was just another chapter in the book of me and him. His eyes met mine when he pulled out my chair and I smiled at him, he gave me his award winning smile back and sat next to me before taking my hand in his again.

“What were you two up too?” Liam asked. The chair next to him noticeably empty along with the one next to Zayn’s. Were they expecting company? I wasn’t quite sure. There was also another empty chair next to the head of the table where Louis was seated. Was someone else coming to lunch too? Harry didn’t say that anyone else was coming. Harry noticed my somewhat puzzled expression at the sight of the empty chairs and squeezed his hand.

“How was it? Was he good?” Niall added eagerly before Payton had the opportunity to hit him. Guess the events of Harry and me last night had been figured out and the pieces were put together. That still didn’t stop me from turning bright red and my face getting hot.

“Awe, she’s blushing! You two are so cute!” Zayn said cheerfully. “You guys finally sealed the deal then?”

“Shut up!” Payton scolded from here seat beside Niall. She met my eyes and smiled brightly. Her smile was even brighter than it had been before but I think that was because Niall was back with her and she had no complaints. I think she also knew that I was truly happy and that made her even more happy too. We were just the two happiest people on the plant. “I do not think we need to broadcast their now apparent sex life across the soon to be dinner table okay? We need to respect that Harry took some things away from Charlie last night.”

I buried my face in my hands and stuck my head on the table. This was not happening. They were not talking about this. They were really not talking about this. I guess I really was back with everyone again because they acted like this before but now it was worse. This was downright embarrassing. “Can you not talk about this?” I questioned, banging my head on the table a couple of times. “Just please don’t.”

“Talk about what?” an unfamiliar female voice rang from somewhere behind Zayn and Liam.  I didn’t look up though because I was trying to hide the fact that my face was still really really red.

“Charlie and Harry’s now existent sex life.” Liam replied brightly. “Isn’t Ashley coming down for lunch? We did invite her.”

My head snapped up so fast I hit Harry’s chin causing him to bite his tongue and emit some language that should never be repeated. They invited her to dinner? The girls behind Liam and Zayn looked somewhat nervous while they watched my speechless face and Harry who had his hands in his mouth and was holding his tongue. The girls were very pretty. They both had long dark hair and pretty eyes, both same stature and a fashion sense I would kill for. These must have been the girls Harry had told me about, the ones Zayn and Liam had fell for.

“Valeria, this is Charlie.” Liam said somewhat skeptical because of my still shocked face. The one girl smiled and sat down next to Liam, taking his hand in the process. I really couldn’t believe how pretty she was. Liam had picked a keeper. She carried herself confidently and delicately like she knew who she was. Not like me with my nervousness, cold hands, and insecurities.

“Sara this is Charlie.” Zayn said sweetly before helping her into her chair. “Charlie this is Sara. My girlfriend.”

The girl next to Zayn smiled as bright as the stars. Like that was the first time she had heard it. Zayn had picked a keeper too. She was sweet and kind looking like she could never hurt anyone. “Nice to meet you.” Her voice rang out clear as a bell. “I have heard plenty about you and you really are as gorgeous as Harry says you are.”

I blushed and nodded. It wasn’t very often I got compliments from strangers, and these ones were quite pretty compared to me. I was secretly hoping the boys would keep them around because they were for sure keepers. “Thank you.” I quickly turned away to see if Harry was okay considering I hit him pretty hard. He smiled though and winked. His hair messed up and flipped around as always. I took the opportunity to mess it up with my fingers and he caught them in his hands and kissed them.

“You are about to ask if I am okay and I am just fine. We can see if my tongue is working later in the elevator.”

That brought on a hooting and hollering session from all the boys at the table and I buried my face again. Liam thought calmed down and turned over to Valeria who was smiling at the gong show that was going on around her. I wonder if she was prepared for the craziness that was this group of people. It was rather dysfunctional and she seemed completely put together. “Ashley left for home this morning. She said she caused enough trouble and that she needed to go find her own prince and not want someone else’s even if he is the Harry Styles.”

I sat up and looked at Harry. He had a somewhat sympathetic look on his face when he looked at the girls. He was going to apologize; he had that look on his face. The one he gave when he had a deep speech to make.  “I really am sorry. I didn’t think I led her on at all and I didn’t want to ever hurt anyone in this situation.” Harry squeezed my hand at the end and nuzzled my neck with his nose.

Sara smiled at Harry and shook her head. “Don’t apologize. She needed to figure some stuff on her own anyways. And you have a lovely girlfriend so I have no complaints what so ever as to what went down with Ashley because I can see a beautiful friendship about to start.”

Valeria smiled too. “Yeah, don’t worry about it.” she shrugged before sipping her water that the waiter had just brought. “So about this now existent sex life?”

I turned even redder and Harry made a face as everyone began talking at once. Kailee came out of nowhere with a gazillion shopping bags and sat down next to Lou and joined in. as crazy as it sounded I felt like I was with family at a dinner. And when I looked at Harry I could hear his words from this morning. “My heart beats for you.” with that, I took a sip of my water, held my necklace and joined into the chaos that was this conversation. There was a lot more I had to think about and had to say but at this moment. I wanted to enjoy it.

Epilogue

Buzz. Buzz. Buzz.

My phone vibrated on my bedside table. Buzz.Buzz.Buzz. It just wouldn’t stop. Buzz. Buzz. Buzz. It had been doing that for about twenty minutes now and I really didn’t want to pick it up. We had gotten home last night at around three in the morning to find clear roads, clear skies and weather that was about eight degrees. It was a shock to the body after being in twenty five degrees for a week in LA but I was happy to be back to reality in London which meant regular life with Harry. The last six days with Harry in LA were fabulous and wonderful but I really had enough excitement for that amount of time. I made new friends with the boy’s new girlfriends, I enjoyed being with Kailee and Payton when they weren’t with their boyfriends and I really enjoyed being with my own boyfriend too.

Speaking of boyfriends I somehow knew mine was texting me since it was six thirty in the morning and he would be a keener and not be able to sleep. He did offer to take me back to his place next door when we got in but we both knew we wouldn’t sleep if we did that and I had missed enough sleep from doing other things in the last few days. We stayed up talking almost every night after we made up. We talked about everything we used to like nothing had changed and I loved that about him that we just picked back up from where we left off.

I finally rolled over and picked up my phone which was of course flashing Harry’s number and picture. Yup. He would be a keener and wake me up after three hours of sleep.

“Can you not call me at six thirty in the morning when I want to sleep til four in the afternoon?” I said somewhat annoyed into the speaker of my iPhone. I knew Harry would know I was grouchy at this hour so he would take it to heart.

Harry chuckled. He sounded wide awake. He probably didn’t even go to bed and was fully dressed and goofing off with Louis who I could hear through the wall talking to Kailee. “Come outside love! I have a surprise for you!”

I sat upright in my bed and pushed my rumpled hair out of my face. It was actually kind of odd not having him in bed with me. We stayed together every night in LA and it was actually the first night I had a bed to myself and not his lanky arms and legs taking up all the space and covers. I really didn’t think it was going to be that much of a difference with him being gone for a month but it was. I was not used to hairy legs rubbing up against mine at various hours of the night, waking me up and forcing me to roll over. I believe it was last night that I actually shoved him right out of bed. Clearly a double bed was not big enough for the two of us considering the bed in his room at home was a king and so was mine. It wasn’t like I wasn’t used to sharing a bed with him it was just that this one was awfully small.

I really wanted to sleep the night before considering we were leaving the next day and Niall was staying with Payton in our room and I knew they would be doing things that involved empty rooms and no clothes so Harry and I decided since we were not about to be doing that, that we would stay in his room with Louis who was in Kailee’s room with the do not disturb sign in front of it. Harry and I hadn’t really “slept” together since the first time because well… we actually didn’t want too. We wanted to enjoy each other’s company that we had again and probably just didn’t want to go at it. Anyways I just wanted to have a good sleep but Harry did not tell me that Louis and his bed in their room was a double. I thought I would be fine. Until I actually got to sleep and Harry stole all the covers and his arm was under my already lumpy pillow. He was breathing lightly and fast asleep and I was cold and staring at the celling. I finally snapped when his legs stretched out over to my side of the bed and I was left with a foot at the edge. Nope, this girl needed sleep. Maybe it was me PMS’ing or something but I didn’t care. I shoved him right off the bed.

“Ouch!” Harry said after waking up and hitting the floor with a thump. “What was that for love?”

It was too late for me to reply though. I had smothered myself with all the covers, rolled over and as soon as my head hit the pillow again, I fell asleep with a smile on my face.

I really didn’t understand why I was thinking about this now. I had so many things to think about. I went shopping with Valeria and Sara in order to get to know them better and we ended up having a blast and hitting it off right away. Then there was my dinner date with the boys alone. Niall, Louis, Zayn, and Liam treated me to a dinner at a steakhouse. They ditched their significant others and lied to Harry about where I was to take me out. Harry and I went to the beach and went skinny dipping. That didn’t last long thought because the cops came and Harry and I had to run like mad so we didn’t get caught. I had been smart though and kept my underwear in my hands so I slipped it on so I didn’t flash the world. Harry on the other hand left his on the beach and gave the cops an eyeful. I just made sure I didn’t look down. I just had so many memories from the last few days. So so many. I just didn’t know when I would have time to think of them all.

My phone began to vibrate again and I noticed Harry was Face Timing me now. Apparently I had hung up from our phone call? I guess so I didn’t really know since I was going on three hours of sleep.

“Come outside and downstairs love!” he said brightly with a cheeky smile, his hair a prefect mess just how he liked it. His green eyes glittered in the light from the street lamp and he looked like an excited four year old.

I rolled my eyes. “Harry. It is six thirty seven in the morning. I have better things to do. Like sleep which you prevented me getting from since you stole all the covers the night

before

yesterday.” I looked away for a moment and when I looked back I knew I wasn’t going to win this battle. He had stuck the puppy dog face on and was slowly seducing me with his eyes.

“Please?” he said with one more pleading look. Yup, I was roped in. Clearly I was in for another sleepless night. Well technically it wasn’t night but it was still going to be sleepless even though I needed it.

I smiled, hung up and crawled out of my warm comfy bed to find some clothes. Nope. No clothes for me. I straightened my PJ pants, picked up his navy sweater that was on the floor from when I left here and pulled it over my head. He wouldn’t care if I didn’t have on actual clothes considering he has seen me with any on at all. Just the thought of that night made me blush. It was definitely one that I would never forget.  For several reasons that were very known to me and to others; the way he touched me, the way I felt, what he said to me, and more. For a moment I forgot what I was up for. My phone vibrated with a text in my hand and I then remembered that I was actually supposed to be doing something. It was Harry telling me to hurry up. Oh yeah, I was actually doing something.  I didn’t have time to reminisce about everything. I quickly slipped my converse on my feet, grabbed my key off the key ring and slipped out the door. I could hear Payton snoring along with Niall all the way from the kitchen and I smiled. They were so good together lately. Over the trip they had just gotten cuter. Feeding each other, piggy backs, rubbing sunscreen on each other. I don’t know it was just so darn cute I couldn’t be happier for her. She had loosened up a lot more again. She was more outgoing than she used to be. I actually didn’t have to pick clothes out for her anymore when we went shopping.

The air was chilly considering I only had a bra and Harry’s sweater on top and flannel polka dotted PJ pants on the bottom. I didn’t even put socks on. I had to look around for Harry because it was still pretty dark out and when I saw him I burst out laughing. He was fully dressed in his winter coat and jeans, signature white converse on his feel too. That was not the funny part though. The funny part was the fact that Harry was leaning up against a Ducati motorbike, two helmets in hand. He could not be serious.

“No way!” I pointed my index finger at Harry. “You are not serious.” I couldn’t stop shaking my head and laughing and telling him no. He himself chuckled and set the helmets down before approaching me. He was trying to be suave and smooth but that failed when he stumbled and straightened to make him look like he could walk straight. This boy was something else. But he was mine.

Harry pulled me into his arms and held me tight. I inhaled his scent and smiled into his chest. I still couldn’t believe he was in my arms again. It was just so surreal still. He pulled back just enough so he could see my face. “Rumor had it when we were in LA that you liked getting on the back of motorcycles with hot guys driving. I know you think I’m hot so does that mean you’ll get on the back of my motorcycle?”

I chuckled and shook my head. He would be cheeky with this situation. The rational side of me kicked in and I looked at the bike. I was very flattered by what he did but I was secretly hoped he didn’t buy the bike. “You didn’t buy that thing did you?”

“God sakes no! I just rented it… I want to take you somewhere. It’s kinda a long drive though. That’s why I had to get you up.” He looked around and smiled his brilliant smile that could render me speechless, which it did. It made my heart beat speed up several beats and skip a few while it was at it. “So are you gonna hop on or not?”

I snickered and ran a hand through my hair. Was he really doing this? For me? This early in the morning too? I still had a question though. “You think I think you’re hot?”

“A little birdy might have mentioned it.” he winked and bit his lip. “If it makes you feel better I think you’re gorgeous and you should hop on the back of the bike with me”

I sighed. I couldn’t get out of this one. I was totally roped in by him and his green eyes and smell and touch and just by his presence. Screw the fact that I was exhausted, I wanted to know what he planned. I stepped out of his arms and walked over to wear the bike was. Picking up one of the helmets I stared at the bike. “Harry Styles you do know how to drive this thing don’t you?”

Harry climbed onto the bike and slipped his helmet on. He started the bike and I wrapped my arms around his waist. He still hadn’t answered my question though. “Harry you know how to drive this thing don’t you?” I repeated as we started moving. 

Suddenly he hit the gas. We sped forward to the street, my hair was flying, I was giggling, Harry was laughing and my thoughts seemed to disappear because it was just him and I. My love was still there and burning like it had been before. We had gone the distance. We had made it through that bump in the road and I had to say; If we could make it though that we could make it through anything. This moment was just perfect. The streetlights lit the way as we made our way to wherever but at this point I could care less. The saying was correct; Distance makes the heart grow fonder. It had made mine go insane but I did love this kid even more now. I knew it had made his because he was doing this stupid thing for me. I just loved him. It was just that way. And I knew nothing could change that.

Harry turned back and saw my smiling face and smiled back. “Just to inform you I really do not know how to drive this thing so if we die it is not my fault okay. You’re the one that likes hoping on the back of hot guy’s motorbikes.”

I grinned at him and held him tighter. “I love you. You’re insane but I love you.”

He smiled and sped the bike up just as we hit the highway. “I love you too. But if we do die I blame you.” And with those last words we sped off to wherever we were going and to whatever was waiting for us.