*Chapter 9*
{Month 5}
Johnny slid into the empty seat across from me at the table in the grocery store's break room. He smiled and set down his soda and sandwich. I smiled back and continued to flip through the People Magazine in front of my and idly sip at my vitamin water. I could be having delicious coffee right now, but no. I just had to be pregnant in the middle of winter. Well, it wasn't even winter yet, but it sure felt like it.
"Are you doing anything after work today?" Johnny asked. I looked up and thought about it before shaking my head. I had thought I had a doctor's appointment but that was next week.
"Nope, just going home to finish some homework," I shrugged.
"Do you wanna catch a movie or something?" he wondered. "We haven't spent much time together besides work since we graduated."
He was right. Johnny was almost as close to me as Preston was. Aside from the fact that he, Preston and I used to spend almost everyday together, his dad is obviously my boss and his mom was my volleyball coach from third to tenth grade. He was my second best friend and now we hardly do anything together. The realization made me sad.
"Sure, what did you wanna see?" I agreed, setting my magazine aside. The discovery of Justin Bieber's newest tattoo of Jesus could wait a few minutes. Though, that guy is pretty hot...and shirtless in the pictures.
"Have you seen Sherlock Holmes yet?" he asked.
I shook my head and smiled. "Nope, not yet. You?"
"Nope, wanna go?" he smiled.
"Yeah, what time?" I wondered.
"I'll check the times and get back to you," he said.
"Alright, sounds good," I smiled.
"'Kay, I'll get back to you, Riles," he assured. With that, he picked up his half eaten sandwich and empty soda can and left the break room.
I smiled to myself about the prospect of catching up with a friend later and went back to those glorious pictures. My smiled widened even more. Got to love those international male pop sensations.
~EINH~
"Two for the five o' clock Sherlock Holmes, please," Johnny told the kid at the counter who was selling the tickets. He put it into the computer while I turned to my friend.
"You don't have to pay for mine, too," I told him, placing my hands on my hips.
He shrugged. "I got paid today," he said as if it were an answer.
I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, so did I," I rebutted.
"I got paid more," he countered, sliding his card through the little slot at the bottom of the window.
"No you didn't!" I shouted playfully. I knew what his weekly paycheck looked like and it was a little less than what I was paid.
"I know," he admitted, hanging his head. I chuckled a little bit.
"Which is why I should pay for my own ticket," I reasoned.
"But I don't have two kids on the way to save up for," he pointed out, poking my swollen stomach lightly.
I scowled. Of course, he was right and I couldn't exactly argue. "Fine, but I'm paying for popcorn and soda." He agreed and took the tickets from the kid before we walked into the theater.
I walked to the snack counter and quickly bought two sodas and a large popcorn. It came out to be a little less than what the tickets cost, so it all worked out. Finally, we were able to go up to the usher that was taking our tickets. He directed us to our theater and we thanked him. I was holding all the snacks, so Johnny was chivalrous and held open the door for me. I smiled and led the way into the theater.
It wasn't so hard to find two seats next to each other. Yeah, the room was kind of packed since this was our only theater for a while, but people usually came in bigger groups to action movies. I saw two near the middle and headed straight for them, Johnny trailing behind me.
I plopped into one seat while Johnny slid into the one next to me. He took the sodas and popcorn from me so I could get situated in my seat. You'd be surprised at how difficult it is to maneuver in the seats when you were barely five months pregnant with twins. I took my soda back once I was comfortable and squished the popcorn between us.
"How's Preston?" Johnny asked as the pre-previews rolled through the theater.
That simple question launched me into a flashback of what had happened just a few weeks before. That Thanksgiving had been exciting and disappointing. I loved being able to see and talk to my best friend, but the fact that everything I had brought up my courage for had fallen through the cracks was a real bust.
As I had expected, the sound and picture had cut out right before I had said that I was pregnant. The whole session was lost and he hadn't heard I word I had said. He called my cell phone just a few moments later to properly say good bye.
"Wait, what were you going to say?" he had asked immediately after I picked up.
I sighed, knowing I didn't want to tell him over the phone. Skype was about as close as I was going to get to face-to-face and I wouldn't tell him any other way. I had been set on that resignation for a long time.
"I just was going to say I love you and I can't wait to see you again," I lied, flinching at my own words. They had been so bittersweet in that moment.
He was quiet on the other end, obviously not totally believing my lie.
"Alright," he responded skeptically. "I can't wait to see you, Riles. I'll call you sometime within the next two weeks, I promise. I love you, angel." His voice sounded sad and I couldn't help but wonder if my lies were the reason for it.
"I love you, too, Preston," I mumbled, tears welling up in my eyes. I brought my hand up to my cheeks and wiped the tears away while sniffling. I hated that my nose ran whenever I cried. It had been a constant thing lately.
"Are you crying, Riles?" he asked, sounding concerned.
I figured this lie wouldn't mean so much to me. "No," I said, albeit unconvincingly. I sniffled again unintentionally. Stupid hormones making me cry. Stupid boy. Stupid me.
"Don't cry, angel," he pleaded. "I hate it when you cry, especially when I'm not there."
I wiped more tears away and sniffled again. "I know, I'm sorry. I just miss you and I hate that we only ever get to talk on the phone or send each other letters. I actually want you here with me. I miss you so much, Preston."
"I know," he sighed. "I miss you, too. I can't wait to see you and my family again."
"And we can't wait to see you," I responded, a slight smile fluttering across my face.
"Shit, I gotta go, angel," he sighed as a voice yelled in the background. "I'll talk to you soon. I love you."
My throat constricted. I was a horrible person for not telling him when I had the chance. I am such a wuss. "I love you, too."
"Bye."
"Bye."
I brought myself back to present day and turned to Johnny. "He's doing well," I said. "I haven't actually talked to him in a while, but the last time I did, he was doing well."
"That's good," he nodded. "Will he be back home anytime soon?"
I shrugged. "He doesn't know for sure. Could be a few months or it could be another year. Know one knows at this point."
Right then, someone right behind me shushed me. I turned around and shot the person a glare. When I saw that it was Jeremy, that guy from the grocery store over a month ago, I flipped him off. He winked at me and put his pointer finger to his lips. The guys that he was with, people I had seen around town but never talked to, snickered. I flipped them off too and turned back around in my seat.
"Douchebags," I mumbled and Johnny laughed.
~EINH~
The next day was a Saturday, and everyone else that I knew was out doing something. Mom and Dad were out of town for business, Chelsea was out with her boyfriend at a cabin he owned in the mountains, Andie was in another state shopping and Kane was staying home with his family. There was nothing to do; no homework to be done, no one to hang out with, nowhere to go and no sports games on. I was bored out of my mind.
I headed downstairs and made myself some breakfast just to start my day. If I was going to lounge around alone all day, I needed to eat something. As I sat there, I realized I was exactly five months pregnant and it was time to take a picture.
Lily had started this thing where we take a picture every month of my growing belly. She had taken the first one the day I told her that I was pregnant and we had taken one every month since. Today was exactly five months since I had gotten pregnant, so I needed to take one.
I got up as soon as I finished my bowl of cereal and went to find my camera. I finally found it on my nightstand and was glad to see it still was charged. I sat the camera on a side table in the living room and set the timer. I stood a few feet away in front of a wall and pulled my shirt up over my stomach. Just as I got myself situated the camera flashed and my shirt was down just as fast as it had gone up.
After I checked the camera and deemed it as good enough, I put the camera back in my room and headed for a shower. I had nothing else to do, so I might as well waste time in the bathroom and get clean at the same time.
Once I had taken a nice long shower, I got dressed in a pair of sweats and a sweatshirt and planted myself in front of the TV in the living room. I flipped through the channels for a while, searching for anything good on TV. Finally, I came across a marathon of Keeping Up with the Kardashians and settled on that. Khloe and Scott were just in the middle of shouting at each other as the sound and image appeared.
As I was nearing the end of episode number three, there was three knocks on the door and the doorbell rang. Lily had knocked on the door like that for as long as I could remember. I heaved myself off the couch and waddled to the door. Yes, it had gotten to the point where I was waddling. It sucked. These kids were going to come out huge.
"Hi, baby," Lily greeted as I opened the door. She hugged me before sliding into the house and closing the door behind her. She grabbed my hand and led me back to the living room; neither of us spoke until we were seated on the love seat.
"How are you doing, hon?" she asked me as I settled back.
I turned the volume down on the TV as I answered.
"I've been doing good. I didn't have to work today, so I've had a lazy day," I admitted.
She giggled and patted my hand. "Understandable. You've been working really hard lately, on top of school."
I nodded. "Yeah, I've had to. I gotta save up for these two," I rubbed my stomach, "and school is important. I vowed to myself that if this were to ever happen to me, school would still be near the top of my priority list. Can't have a good job without a good education."
She smiled at me sweetly, the kind a mother gives her child when she's tried her hardest and given her all. "I know, baby. I just get worried sometimes. We all do. Me, your parents and David."
"About what?" I asked, honestly curious.
"Well, even the most healthy, fit people have a limit. You've just been pushing yourself lately. Do you feel alright?"
I nodded. "Yeah, I eat enough, I sleep as needed, and I take all my vitamins. The doctor says I'm doing really well, too."
"That's good, hon," Lily sighed happily, rubbing my knee. "I'm glad you're doing well." I could tell by the look in her eyes that that wasn't all she was here for.
"What else is it, Lily?" I wondered, getting straight to the point. I hated beating around the bush, even though I had been doing it a lot myself, lately. I am such a hypocrite on top of being a generally horrible person.
"Well, I was just wondering about the Preston Situation," she hesitantly replied.
The 'Preston Situation' is what we had all taken to calling the issue of telling Preston. I had started referring to it that way, so everyone else just took to it, also. It was a lot easier to say than having to explain that it was the matter of when I was going to tell him and if it was even going to happen soon.
"I don't know, Lily," I sighed, leaning my head back on the couch. "I got up the courage on Thanksgiving, and I actually said the words."
"But he didn't get a chance to hear them," she finished.
"Exactly!" I yelled, frustrated with the whole situation. "I was hoping to just get it over with then. It was the closest we were going to get to talking in person for a while, but no. The stupid internet connection had to die on us and totally run everything!" I threw my open palms down on the couch and let out an unattractive grunt.
"I know, baby," Lily cooed, scooting closer to me. She leaned my head on her shoulder and ran her fingers through my hair the way I liked. I just took deep breaths and held back tears.
I guess she heard me sniffle because she shushed me and starting humming a lullaby from my childhood. My mom had never sung this one to me, but Lily had always hummed it to the boys and Andie when they were younger. It had just become a tune I was familiar with and comforted by.
Eventually, I just let the tears run freely down my face and onto the sleeve of her nice peacoat. She didn't seem to mind, though. She just kept humming to me and running her fingers through my hair.
"You know," she finally mumbled a while later, "I think you're doing the right thing."
"You do?" I asked.
"Yes," she nodded once. "I mean, it may not seem like the right thing, but it is in this situation. I know how Preston and you work, and telling him any way other than face to face would be wrong. Even if you don't tell him until after the babies are here, I think he'd prefer it. This isn't the type of thing he'd want you to tell him about over the phone, through letters or even over Skype. He'd want you to tell him in person, even if he'll be livid when you do finally tell him."
"That's the problem," I whined. "I feel like such a monster not telling him now, but I don't want to be informal about it. But I don't want him to hate me when the time comes, either."
"Well, you guys are both practical with a good head on your shoulders. I think you'll work past it, in the end. You're best friends; how can you not? I know you both love each other. Love makes the world go round."
It was in that moment that I realized I was just like that girl I had drawn in my margin doodle during my English lecture a while ago. I was alone in this, falling without anyone to catch me, regardless of all my loved ones that surrounded me. The only one that mattered, the one that had the capability to catch me, wasn't here. Preston was everything I've never had and everything I'll ever need and he's not around. I was screwed.
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Finally got this up. I'm so sorry for the long wait you guys. I promise chapter ten will be up sooner. This has not been edited, so don't kill me if there's problems xP
'Sometimes we must choose between what is right and what is easy.'
--Albus Dumbledore
Until next time guys :)
--Nikki