It took a moment or two, but thankfully Liam finally turned away. When he did I felt myself relax, but something inside of me was still tense. I knew that waitress would come back, but I wondered if she would still flirt with Liam after what I just did. Speaking of what I just did, why did I do that anyway, I didn't even know this boy Liam and yet I'm seething with jealousy at the thought of him and any girl flirting with each other. This of course was ridiculous and stupid, there was no way I could possibly have feeling for someone I barely even knew.
I couldn't even hold a conversation with the boy, he's so secretive and dark. Maybe that's why I'm so drawn to him, it's the mystery that hooks me. I glanced at him, catching him looking at me. I could feel my cheeks flush and quickly looked away, straight down at the table. Why had I even come to this stupid gothic bar anyway, if I was back at home this would be the last place I would ever find myself, being here, I basically asked for trouble as soon as my foot touched the ground inside.
If my mom knew where I was right now, she would have the biggest fit and call my dad. He would have an equally large fit and immediately come down and pick me up, then I'd be grounded for good. But now I'm an adult and I could make my own decision; which I liked. This place had a sort of charm to it that I loved, and wanted to keep seeing. Everyone here had something charming about them.
I saw pulled from my thought when a nicely prepared plate of food was set in front of me, I looked up at Nina the waitress I hated more than anything. She didn't make any eye contact with me, but I could see her looking at Liam. From the corner of my eye, I looked at him, and saw he wasn't paying attention to her anyone. All his attention was on the phone in his hand, his fingers drumming against the small keys on the flip phone, they were fast and strong.
Nina, probably giving up on her eye assault on Liam sighed and walked to her next table, taking their orders. I was pleased with the turn of events, but the pleasant feeling I felt also sickened me too. I wasn't here for a guy like Liam-I wasn't here for guys at all. I came to this school to focus on my studies and work hard on getting my degree so it can jump right into the working field. Before I crashed and burned I needed to snap out of this childish trance I was in and put my focus back on school. Unlike the people I was sitting with, I was here to succeed.
The next day was a hassle, it was the first day of school and I was exploding with excitement and I was a nervous wreck. I woke up two hours early and picked out my clothes, I chose a black pencil skirt that reached my knees, a cute flared peach colored top and matching peach colored heels. After choosing my outfit, I grabbed my toiletry bag and rushed to the showers taking a quick but thorough shower, making sure I rubbed all the dirt from my body.
By the time I reached my dorm, Lillian was up and moving around. The coffee maker on her side of the room was on and brewing some coffee, and she was going through her wardrobe for something to wear. So far it was the complete opposite of my outfit, she'd chosen ripped skinny jeans, a black tank, and green blazer. Her outfit choice didn't bother me, but the fact that she was awake did.
I'd been hoping that when I got back, that she'd be asleep and I could get dressed, but now that she was awake I didn't feel comfortable changing. But, I didn't want to be rude towards her and say or do something that would offend her in any way. She looked at me when I walked in and smiled, returning her gaze to her wardrobe, I watched her take our a different colored blazer and put it back two times in a row.
"Are you going to change, or do you want me to leave?" She asked without looking at me.
I blinked at her, shocked by the question. "W-what do you mean?" I asked her, putting my toiletry bag down on my desk.
"Come on Kadence, you've been standing there for ten minutes. I can tell when someone is uncomfortable with me around, and I know you are." She replied giving me a look for trying to hide it.
"Am I an open book or something?"I asked rubbing the back of my neck with the hand that wasn't gripping my towel so it would stay up.
Lillian smiled and grabbed her toiletry bag off of her bed. "A little bit, it's okay though. But you don't have to worry, you're not my type." She told me and walked towards the door.
"Wait, what do you mean?" I asked furrowing my brow.
Lillian looked at me and raised her brow. "Does it matter?" She countered.
I nodded my head, I thought I would be relieved when she said those words. But in all honesty they made me curious, why wasn't I her type? What was wrong with me that she didn't find me attractive? Was I not attractive to lesbians or something, and if so why not?
"Why, do you want me to be attracted to you?"
"No, I just want to know why your not, out of curiosity." I told her quickly.
"Well, I'm more into the sweet and vulnerable girls, so I can protect them and tell them how beautiful they are. You, you can hold your own obviously, you're pretty tough, but I like to be the tough one." She explained.
I nodded. "So you're the guy in the relationship?" I asked.
She shrugged her shoulders. "You could say that, but last time I checked I had lady parts." She smiled at me and walked out of the room, the door clicking closed quietly behind her.
When Lillian came back, I was fully dressed and gathering my stuff. Before getting dressed, she politely asked me if I minded, of course I said no. She got dressed fast and was pouring us coffee in seconds. To be honest, Lillian was the best roommate anyone could possibly ask for, she was kind and considerate towards others. I felt bad for judging her and making her feel weird in her own dorm; who she loved shouldn't matter.
After putting my coffee in a to-go container, I grabbed my bag, and walked out of the dorm. Lillian had left a few minutes before me, she'd said something about her class being all the way across campus. My class was on the other side too, but unlike Lillian I had a ride, Harry had promised to have someone pick me up for class after hearing about the distance my class was from where I was staying. At first I'd said no, I didn't want to burden anyone with my problems but he'd insisted. He said he'd find someone with a class in the same area or building as me, that way it wouldn't be a burden because everyone would win.
I liked Harry a lot, he was a good friend and super nice unlike Liam. He seemed to always be there to help someone and I liked that about him. Sometimes I felt like he was flirting with me, and that made me feel bad because I didn't want a boyfriend right now. Right now, I just wanted to focus on my studies and turning him down would be a hard thing to do. I didn't want to lose him as a friend because of that, that would absolutely break my heart. But dating right now, this early in the year was a big no-no. Any other time though, I wouldn't mind because Harry was hella attractive, just let me tell you.
'He might be attractive but he's not as attractive as Liam.' My subconscious said. That was true, Harry next to Liam was nothing. Liam had this essence about him like none other, despite how he looked whenever he walked into a room, the room seemed to brighten. That sounds cheesy, but it's true. Something about him is pure and light, underneath that hard and rough exterior I was convinced there was something worth digging for. If only I was interested in dating, I may have gone searching for it.
I stepped outside and looked around, the sun was bright in the sky, and the air was hot and sticky. The weather almost made me want to go back inside and change into shorts and a tank-top, but I resisted the urge. The last thing I wanted to do was make whoever was driving me to my class late to theirs, it would suck if I lost a ride. I craned my neck, but didn't see anyone signaling for me to come with them. I was beginning to doubt Harry had found anyone to take me, and think up a speech for him about him making me late on my first day when a familiar sleek black car rolled into the parking lot.
The nice car parked in front of me, and through the windshield I could see Liam sitting inside. He honked the horn once, startling me and making me jump. The gesture almost made me want to walk, but I knew if I did I would be late for class and that was the last I wanted to happen. So, I walked over to the passenger seat and opened the door, getting inside. Once I was safely inside, Liam pulled out of the parking space he's pulled into and joined the line of cars waiting to exit the parking lot.
"Looks like I'll be you chauffeur to your class from now on." Liam said after a while of awkward silence.
I looked at him, admiring the planes of his face; drinking in every detail I could. "You know you don't have to drive me if you don't want to, how did Harry even get you too? Don't you hate me?"
He looked at me and frowned, his features almost looking innocent when he did that. I wanted so badly to reach over and trace every line in his forehead, and kiss his lips-gosh, they looked soft. "I asked Harry if I could drive you, he was shocked too," Liam replied. "I don't hate you, I don't have a reason to."
"But-you're always so cold to me, why?" I pushed wanting answers.
"I don't-I don't know exactly why, I'm just this way with everyone." He shrugged his shoulders, checking his mirrors as he turned onto the road.
"You shouldn't be like that to people, it's rude and wrong." I scolded him.
He glared at me, "Who asked you?" He hissed, his tone was so harsh it felt like he slapped me in the face.
I frowned. "Pull over." I wasn't going to sit in this car and be spoken to as if I was dirt beneath this boys foot. No matter how attractive he was or how much his voice lulled me and his scent intoxicated me. I didn't care if he had the most dreamy eyes and his lips were soft and plump, making me just want to smash mine against his and-whoa, focus Kadence, I scolded myself.
"No." He replied simply and kept driving.
"I don't want you to drive me." I snapped, anger filling me by his reply.
He shrugged his shoulders. "I don't care, I'm driving you." He told me.
"I don't want you to!"
"I didn't ask." He said calmly.
"Why are you trying to ruin my day!" I was basically screaming at him now. "Why can't you just leave me alone?"
"Because I like you!" He shouted back, looking at me and meeting his eyes. My heart picked up speed and I stared at him; this beautiful rebellious boy that I'd met only a few days or weeks ago. This boy that my parents would have never approved, this boy that resembled the boys at my high school that I loathed with every fiber of my being.
He told me he liked me, and I think I liked hearing those words leave his lips. Even though we'd barely said any words to each other, even though he's rude and impatient, rough, and mean. I couldn't help but leap in my skin at the sound of those words. Did I like him? No way, I didn't even know him. But why did I feel this way?
Kadence-why do you feel this way? I asked myself.