Tom looked at his locker, trying to focus on what he needed from inside, but he couldn't. He wasn't angry. He wasn't even pissed. What was lower down the list than pissed? Ticked off. Yes, he was a little ticked off. And also a little worried.
Angie had stood him up. Left him waiting by the swings in the park with a bouquet of flowers and no sunglasses. Left him there with the desire to open up to her, tell her everything and start a relationship. A proper one. Left him there with a burning desire to kiss her.
But she never showed. After an hour of waiting, worried out of his mind, he'd skated to her house. Well, Kay's house. Every window was dark and he had no idea where Angie's room was or he would've climbed in to make sure she was alright. He'd spent way too much time staring at the house.
Then, with his last bit of hope, he'd headed back to the park. Then the diner. Then the club. Angie was nowhere. At three in the morning, he'd finally given up and went home where he'd spent the rest of the night doing homework. So he'd had zero sleep.
Yes, he was a little ticked.
"Hey, Tommy, you okay?"
Tom groaned and banged his head against the locker before turning to Gina. He cheered up considerably when he saw her worried expression and the Styrofoam cup of coffee and paper bag in her hand.
"Morning," he answered with a smile. He liked nice Gina.
"You look terrible." She handed him the coffee cup and paper bag which contained a yummy bagel.
"I'm okay. You should stop bringing me food because I can't say no to it."
"You're not okay. You look exhausted. And I don't mind bringing you food."
Tom shrugged and took a sip of coffee. It was unhealthly sweet, just like he liked it. "Didn't get much sleep last night."
Gina nibbled on a hang nail, seeming severely worried. Which was new. Gina was rarely worried.
"You okay? What's up?"
She just nibbled some more. Finally, after Tom was done eating his bagel, she opened her mouth to speak. "I'm not sure if I should be telling you this. I'm... we broke up and it's none of my business."
Tom raised an eyebrow and downed the rest of the coffee. "Try me."
"I mean, it's not my place, but... are we friends?"
Something terribly weird was going on. "I guess we are. You brought me food in jail and there must be a friendship law regarding that."
She didn't crack a smile, just sighed. "Okay, then as your friend, I want to warn you against that Angie girl you're seeing."
He frowned. "Um, what?"
"She's dating Ross and I have a feeling you don't know that."
At the risk of repeating himself... "Um, what?" That was beyond stupid. Angie didn't even know Ross. The guy was a year older and was too busy being a douche to go out with Angie. And besides, Angie was going out with him. Or was at least supposed to.
"And there's this rumor flying around that she has this older dude with a a Mercedes picking her up from school," Gina continued the avalanche of improbable bullshit. "She has all these sugar daddies that help her out."
"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard."
She only shrugged. "I don't know about that. They're just rumors. Just like the one that she was the one seducing Collins to get a higher grade, not the other way around. The Ross thing on the other hand... Yes, that one I can confirm."
Tom just stared as her words seeped into his exhausted brain and started gaining meaning. At first, it was nothing, then the heat came. Luke warm at first, it turned into a towering inferno in his veins. His vision blurred and it was like someone painted the lenses of his glasses red.
"By the way, why didn't you tell her you're an orphan?"
"What the hell does that have to do with anything?" he snapped. He regretted it the moment Gina flinched, but what the hell? It felt like his entire world had turned upside down and all he wanted was to strangle Ross.
"Nothing. Ross just told me she was bummed when she found out."
"Found out? That asshole told her!"
"Does it matter how she found out?" Gina asked. "I bet she won't give you the light of day now she knows she can't mooch off you."
He opened his mouth to defend Angie, to argue that she was nothing like that. That she was a good girl, a fighter, that she didn't care about money, but there was a lump in his throat. A desert in his mouth, a volcano in front of his eyes. He couldn't function, not until he faced Ross and punched his face in.
So he whipped away from Gina and stalked towards Douche King's locker. If there was any truth in what Gina had said, he'd be able to beat it out of Ross. And then he'd think what to do about Angie. If she'd screwed him over... He couldn't even process the possibility. Not now.
He turned the corner and froze. Angie was right there. With Ross. Chatting and laughing with him. All fine and happy, like she hadn't stood him up. Ross laughed, too, and wrapped his arm around her shoulders.
"Get your hands off her if you want to keep them!"
Ross and Angie turned to him, both of them looking surprised by his sudden appearance. Ross grinned like a moron while she looked at him as if he were something dirty and sticky stuck to her shoe.
"What's wrong, bro? Am I all up in your territory?"
Tom stalked towards him, fist already raised, but Angie got in his way, blocking his target. The monster inside him wanted to shove her out of the way and beat Ross into a pulp, but the little bit of brain still active stopped him. Why was he doing this? His twisting stomach and aching heart screamed jealousy, but was he jealous? Yup. Crazy jealous.
"Chill, buddy!" Ross said, raising his hands.
"I'm not your buddy so shut your damn mouth," Tom said pointing a finger at him over Angie's head.
"Just leave him alone," she said, shoving him back.
"What the hell are you doing with this douche anyway?"
"Hey, hey, hey. Standing right here," Ross said, but Tom only flipped him off, his full attention on Angie.
"That's none of your damn business," she said between her teeth. "Ross is my friend, and even if he wasn't, you don't own me. I can hang out with whoever I want."
"Yeah, but him? He only wants to get into your pants."
Ross grinned like a douche and gave Tom the thumbs up behind Angie's back. He then turned around and scurried away like the rat he was.
"That's pretty rich coming from you," she spat.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
Somewhere above them, the bell signaling the beginning of class went off, but he didn't care. They were having this out now.
Angie let out a humorless laugh. "I know all about you. Ross and Lily told me everything."
"I have no idea what that dumbass and the school's biggest bimbo told you, but what ever it was, how can you believe them over me?"
"You know, I thought the same. Except you were never honest with me!"
The pounding in Tom's head felt like war drums and he knew he should focus and try getting something out of this, figure out why Angie had suddenly decided he was public enemy number one. But he couldn't. Because he was tired, because he'd lost a night of sleep because of her, because she was with Ross and because she'd stood him up.
"Of course I was."
"Yeah," she fired, "Maybe with all your inconsequential crap. You never told me anything about yourself."
"That's not true. I told you everything." He'd never opened up to anyone more than he'd opened up to her. He showed her who he really was, told her about his plans and dreams and worries. He fucking punched a teacher for her.
"Oh yeah? How about your two jobs then? Or your family? Or should I say the family you don't have?"
He froze, the fire in his veins slowly turning into ice. It wasn't sudden. It was slow and painful, leaving behind a murky fog that smothered him and made it impossible to think.
"Why does it matter?" he whispered.
Angie pounced on him, attacking without mercy at the sign of weakness. "Of course it matters because that's who you are! That's the real you!"
He shook his head. It hurt. It felt like his brain was swimming in too much liquid. "No, that's not who I am."
"Yes, it is! You're Tom, the orphan. It defines you."
"It only defines you if you let it. I don't." He straightened, standing tall before her. There was no way he was letting her bring him down, destroy what he'd tried so hard to build. "You see, this is why I didn't tell you. Because I didn't want a fucking tag stamped on my forehead. I didn't want to see the goddamn pity in your eyes."
Angie took a step back and her eyes twinkled with fear and regret. But it only lasted for a second. She squared her shoulders and pushed her chest out. "This was not something you should've kept hidden from me."
"I would have told you. Only that someone decided not to show up last night."
"But it was alright," she continued as if he'd said nothing. "As long as you were the one in control, the one who didn't have to share."
"This isn't some damn power play!"
"Apparently it is. You and your damn list."
"Me and my what?" This was spinning out of control and it became very hard to focus as she spewed out garbage with impressive speed.
"All you ever wanted was to take advantage of me!" She clenched her fists and her eyes filled with tears. "And I can't believe I almost let you!"
He stared at her, his eyes watering from the effort. Who was she and where was Angie? Or was this the real Angie? Had he been so blind, so stupid? Had he created an imaginary perfect girl inside his head, one that didn't exist?
"I'm the one taking advantage of you? You're the one who stood me up! You're the one being all nice and touchy with Ross! You're the one I'm probable going to jail for! What was the problem? Found out I'm an orphan and I'm no longer attractive to you because I'm poor?"
"Fuck you!"
The words echoed in the empty hallway, ringing in his ears. The anger he felt bounced around with them, freeing him, leaving him drained, exhausted, empty.
He looked at the tears in Angie's eyes, but for the first time, they meant nothing. He was done.
"No thanks," he said cooly. "I don't want any Ross germs."
For a second, she looked at him shocked, seemed to be hurt and he almost felt sorry for her. Almost, became the following second her features rearranged into a mask of rage.
"You two faced bastard! They were right about you! I should've never trusted you, think you were different."
He couldn't do this anymore. Explain, justify himself when he didn't have to. "You know what? I'm done. Done with the drama. Dome with you. Play the victim to someone who gives a shit."
And without giving her more arrows to shoot at him, he whipped around and walked away. With every step he took, he could almost hear the crunch of his breaking heart, like he was stepping on the pieces instead of picking them up and trying to put them back together.
He pushed the doors open and hurried down the stairs. Above him, the storm clouds rumbled menacingly. Lightning flashed between them, making them look like starving monsters there to devour everything in their path. He stopped to stare at them. What were the chances of lightning striking him and ending his misery?
No, you're not doing this again. He wouldn't go down that dark path anymore. Even if the pain was excruciating, tearing him open from the inside out.
This is your own damn fault for being a trusting idiot, for not paying attention again, for letting her in.
"Tom!" Billy rushed down the stairs and stopped next to him. "You okay? You look awful."
He felt awful, but who cared anymore? "Did you know?"
"Did I know what?" Billy asked carefully.
"About Ross and Angie."
Billy sighed. "I know that they hang out. But I think the rest are just stupid rumors spread by jealous people."
Tom nodded absently. Even Billy knew. The muted anger inside him exploded, bringing him to the ground, his head in his hands. He was such and idiot. Once again, he'd failed to pay attention. He'd been so blinded by his feelings, by his stupid hope.
Gina had been right. The moment Angie found out he was an orphan, she'd chosen someone who could provide for her, just like he knew she would.
Giant rain drops splattered around him on the cheek and pavement, creating uneven patterns around him. The sky had finally opened up and cried over Tucson.
🔱🔱🔱
Surprise update! Because WI has reached 2k reads and because everyone was probably wondering what the hell was going on... well, here it is.
Once again, I want your every little thought on this because it's very important that it turns out right. Plausible. Sad and miserable.
I'm really curious if you have a side. Or what you think will happen next.
Thanks so much for reading. I'll try to get the next update up on Monday. If not, a little later. Depends on when I actually get time to write it 😇
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