All I felt was insecure. How could he do such a thing? I knew the man was vile and cruel, but I didn't think he would really go so far as to break my heart, again. It was my fucking fault, I fell for his shit again, I let him in, and look where it got me. Right back at the beginning. Weak.
As I curled myself tighter into a sphere, holding my limbs close, all I could think about was the embarrassment, the immense embarrassment. All this time I thought he had 'changed'. Changed my arse, he was the same man he was six years ago. He didn't love me, he never had and he never will, he was just using me for my body.
Slowly my eyes began to fill with the all-too familiar salty liquid. At first, after leaving, I refused to allow myself to cry. I should have expected it. But I eventually gave in, it hurt. It hurt me that I knew he could hurt me so easily.
I hadn't even realised he was still in touch with the conniving little slag, Jessica, I hadn't seen her in about three years, and let me tell you I was so fucking grateful for her departure from my life. Since the age of around fifteen, all she insisted on was tormenting my existence. I used to be able to stand her constant bitchy-ness, her constant need to be on top.
But when she assisted at breaking my heart, I drew the line. I never wanted to see those eyes again, those cruel, smug eyes. She loved it, and I'm pretty sure he did too, having the power to break me just by being together.
I closed my eyes, respiring deeply as my mind drifted in to the past, recalling the pain memories held within; bringing me back to six years ago.
FLASHBACK
I love him. I'm so in love with him- it's intoxicating. Damon Sharpe, the bad boy. I know he feels the same way, he treats me so differently to everybody else. He's so dominating. It sounds crazy that me, a 17 year old teenager is saying such things but, everything about him turns me on.
It doesn't surprise me that- the fact that his dad is the leader of a gang (which he has huge involvement in) doesn't affect me. My whole life is surrounded by that world, and although I never truly involve myself in it, it's my family.
All my thoughts stop as I see Damon coming out of the sleek silver Mercedes S63 AMG, wearing a dark blue shirt; buttoned down revealing his chest and showing a slight tattoo. His broad shoulders looked defined as ever, and the size of him, Oh the god damn size.
I'm hopeless. He catches eyes with me and smirks. "What you staring at, pervert." He jokes as I walk up to him. I punch his chest playfully. I say 'playfully', I just wanted to feel those rock hard pecks. Oh Jesus save me. "Shut up, idiot." I respond, rolling my eyes. Before I know it, he has me by the hand, twirling me round forcefully. He presses my body up against the door, subtly grinding into me.
"Play nice Saige, and maybe I might too." His whispered breath fanned my ears, heightening my senses. I met his pierce gaze with defiance and strength, and he fucking loved it; I was the only girl brave enough to give him a hard time (no pun intended.)
"Bite me." My eyebrows rose slightly. I wasn't being serious, it was obviously just sarcasm. But immediately his head returned to my neck, responding with a slight nip to my ear. "Happily." Once again his engagements had my knees dwindling and core seeping. His dominance, his possessiveness, it was all so arousing.
He knew precisely what he needed to do to get me pleading for him, craving him. As I did him. We had a fucked up relationship, we weren't fuck buddies, no I'm a virgin, but we both know we desired each other. We were so sexual together, but he respected my wishes, he would never pressurize anything towards me. But it's not like I didn't want to.
He urged me into his car, fastening me down hurriedly. The subterranean red interior emphasised the expense of the car, making the entire situation even more invigorating. "You're house?" I knew the answer, so I don't know why I asked. A sharp nod had me securing my guesses, maybe we would be finally having sex, my subconscious purred. The sexual desire within me boiled at its highest around him.
~
Entering his dynasty for the third time this week, I detected Marco Sharpe, at last, sat on the sofa with a paper and glass of whiskey. The man was fairly isolated, but he was good friends with my father, therefore there was a sufficient amount of mutual respect between us. His eyes removed their hold on the paper, re positioning to me and Damon.
"Saige." His eyes moved firmly on Damon, "So this is becoming a daily thing I see." His voice was cold although unreadable of emotion. I felt Damon stiffen beside me. There was a slight awkward tension in the air, as if Damon didn't know how to respond, which was usually un-heard of.
Deciding to reduce the suffocating atmosphere, I smiled sweetly at the man I knew was an un-remorseful criminal, murderer perhaps. "How are you Mr Sharpe, still working well with my father I hear?" His eyes slightly lighten, causing an inner sigh of relief to escape within me.
Damon unpredictably pulls me away, up the stairs to his room. To be honest, I was quite thankful, and for two reasons. 1. I never knew what do around the elusive Marco Sharpe, and 2. My sexual cravings were on overdrive, I needed Damon, and now.
After immediate entrance into his room, Damon slid his hands from his chin, up through his hair, letting out a deep sigh. Slowly sliding up behind him, my arms glided from his lower back to his shoulders. Instantaneously, he relaxes, turning to face me.
I almost wanted to gasp, his eyes were filled with pain and misperception. A confused look immediately overruns my features. What was he thinking? He caresses my cheek lovingly, before unexpectedly thrusting my head to his, sexually invading my lips with his tongue. I tip my head back, allowing him more access to roam the voids of my mouth.
A slight breathy moan escapes me, resulting in him directly pushing me to the bed, not bothering in releasing the overruling kiss. We couldn't stop, as if we were each other's source of life, hungrily osculating to fulfil the immense desire we accumulated for each other.
We finally break, permitting him to tear my top in order to remove its cruel conceal on my breasts. He begins eagerly kissing down my chest with speed, his lips sucking and nipping at every sensitive nerve. He continues, until a sharp knock abruptly interrupts the scorching session.
Our bodies freeze. A slight blush begin to dangerously creep up as I lay there, half naked under Damon's demanding stature. He tuts irritably, slowly lifting himself off of the bed to the door. Immediately I shield my nude assets with the covers, desperate to know the reason for this unwanted pause.
A crack in the timber ingress exposes the empty face of Marco Sharpe. My eyes lower, as his alarmingly plant on me. His head immediately snaps to Damon, clearly representing irritation. Sliding out the room, Damon left, leaving me alone in his room questioning what the fuck we did wrong.
Around five minutes later he returned appearing plagued with anger. "What was that?" I asked, clearly curious for his sudden change of mood. His back tensed as he poured a drink from his table. "Shut the fuck up." My heart dropped, but was soon replaced with anger.
"What the fuck Damon, I literally asked a question." He turned to face me with cold, unforgiving eyes. "What's gotten into you?" My words were laced with misperception, and I'll admit a little gloom. With sudden added fury he charged at me, his fist threatening to hit me as he threw it in the air.
I immediately shuffled backwards. Safety was the only emotion present when surrounded by Damon, but right now, I felt an array of fear, anger and disgust. "I said to shut your god damn mouth." The words in which he used were spat out with so much hatred, as if he was speaking to his worst enemy.
I didn't reply. Not because he had told me to mute, but because I was stationary with shock. He glared at me for several seconds, intimidating me further, until he eventually returned to his drink. I slid my body off the bed, reaching an arm to his shoulder. "You were all over me ten minutes ago, what's up?" As soon as my fingers grazed his skin he shook them away violently.
Once more he faced me with those piercing grey eyes of his, removing all the happiness I had previously felt. His eyes ruptured through mine, penetrating them with resentment. "Saige." I slightly relaxed. "I was just using you, but now I'm bored of your pathetic frigidness." Directly after those words I felt my organs churn within me. How could he say such a thing? "Leave me the fuck alone, I don't want anything to do with you anymore, you're off my list, if you dare come close to me again. I'll kill you."
I slightly laughed nervously, he's not serious, he would never hurt me; I know that. "Fuck sake Damon, you had me worried there, stop messing around."
But his expression remained the same. Empty. A second knock to the door had my anger rising for an additional time, although this one was gentle, un-audible if it wasn't for the silence swallowing his room.
"Come in Jessica." His words replayed in my mine over and over again as his eyes ripped into mine. Jessica, the whore who's whole purpose was to dismantle my happiness with her natural cruelty? My head snapped to him, anger clearly evident from my appearance. A flash of blonde to my left had tears threatening and my heart stopping.
My questions were swiftly solved as my eyes unwantedly landed on her frame as she entered the room. Immediately I felt the temperature in the room drop, that's how cold this bitch was. She strutted past me with such pride, such joy as she slightly knocked into me.
She was perfect. Perfect figure, perfect face, hair. But her personality plummeted her rating down to a 3.
I wanted to be angry, I wanted to be furious, to hit her maybe, but the betrayal I felt was far too great. Damon knew everything she had done to me, every feeling she was capable of forcing upon me. I hated her, and he knew that.
I believed I couldn't hate her more than I already did, but too quickly was I proven wrong. As she glided up to Damon, wrapping her arms around his neck, she kissed him- resulting in my hatred skyrocketing to unbelievable readings.
He didn't move away, fight it, stop it, or prevent it, nothing. He complied with her in fact, as I stood there gawking. The anger ruptured through my veins, coursing around my body, building up my adrenaline, but the agony. The agony was worse. The kiss didn't last long, but for me it lasted a lifetime.
Once his lips were free from her trap, he took a few steps towards me. I didn't want to look at him, but I couldn't show my weakness, not in front of Jessica. "Go home." He stated, impassive and detached.
At first, I didn't reply, but seeing his empty expression and her smug smirk, a severe anger raged within me. Before I knew it my hand was slapping into his cheek with a force I didn't know I held. The noise echoed through the room, along with a slight gasp from Jessica.
I didn't portray my shock, but Jessica sure did, and to my surprise even Damon eyes showed astonishment to my sudden burst of violence. My eyes remained filled with anger as a single tear slid down my left cheek, leaving a hurtful trail of sorrow. "I hate you." My final words were spat with venom as I stormed out of the room.
Upon immediate exit of the room, the tears flooded, pouring out of me uncontrollably. As I swiftly made my way to the exit, I detected Marco observing me, expressionless and still. Further tears flooded.
Embarrassment on top of the torture, and still, all I wanted was Damon's embrace.
~~~~~~
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