Any Kashton (yes I created our own ship name) shippers still out there? Cuz this ship is so far from being the Titanic.
Yes. Ashton and I hit it off really well and we ended up going on 3 more dates. He is a genuinely sweet guy and you know what's the best part? He doesn't treat me differently or weirdly. Let me explain.
I've always grown up being on the heavier side. I used to get affected when people would make jibes at my weight and would laugh at me for not being able to do things that were not possible because of the size of my body. But as the years passed I guess I got kind of accustomed to all the mockery that now it doesn't even affect me anymore. In fact I am also able to laugh along with the people who laugh at me! I wont say I've grown to accept that plus-size is also beautiful but I'm trying. And I know one day I will be able to call myself beautiful.
Why I explained all that was because I wanted to mention how....genuine Ashton is. He didn't once tell me anything about my size or weight, and I'm not talking about making a joke. He did not even seem to care. He accepted my body size as what it actually is, just another body size!!
Well anyway, it's a Saturday and Ashton and I have planned to try out this new place called Sizzle. We heard they have amazing pasta.
And another point. Ashton lets me pay if I want to. He doesn't get all super macho and masculine. He lets me pay if I ask to. How effin great is he??
I'm waiting for him near the exit of the car park and all I can think about is how amazing the pasta is gonna be. He pulls up near me and as I get in he greets me saying "Hey beautiful." I really shouldn't have applied blush today. My natural blush when I'm around Ashton is more than enough.
"Hey ugly." I greet him back.
"I didn't know you talk to yourself." He retorts back.
"Hmmm....I wonder where the girl you just called beautiful disappeared." I say squinting around.
Ashton is silent for a few seconds.
"K. I give up. I'm not able to think of a better response."
"Haha!! You shouldn't have even tried!! Well, what plans do we have after Sizzle? I'm free today." I say.
"Didn't know you were expensive yesterday."
"You're such a dumb piece of shit you know that?"
"You never fail to remind me every day. But anyways I was thinking we could chill at my place for a bit. You know maybe Netflix and chiilll". He drawls.
"Yeah sure just Netflix and just chill. Calm your panties." I knew he was just kidding though. Both of us were a bit sensible in that department I guess. We just knew it was too early for any hanky panky. Heck we hadn't even kissed yet!
We arrive at Sizzle and it looks really cool! There's a great ambience and it seems pretty crowded but we get a table quickly. We sit down and while looking at the menu, it's like I'm in some parallel universe. I mean they have pastas here such as Macaroni Cupcakes and Fruit infused pasta. That sounds.....not very tasty. I don't trust myself to be able try something new and weird so I go for a simple Cheese pasta. But Ashton seems quite brave. He chooses a Potato Chip Pasta and when it arrives I can't help but drool. It looks delicious!! Ashton notices me staring. "Want some?" I'm shocked. I knew he was sweet and polite. But God sharing food!! I nod and open my mouth but jerkface pulls away and says "Naah. I'm not a gentleman." And then he laughs. But while laughing he also puts a piece if his dish onto my side-plate.
"Just so you know. This act of sharing is not going to be reciprocated. I ain't sharing my cheese pasta."
"Yeah yeah. I don't need you to share your dish."
Oh yeah. He could just eat off my plate and I probably won't even notice. Meh. It's okay. I can afford a little kindness.
My dish arrives and before I even have a chance too properly inhale the heavenly scent, Ashton scoops away half my pasta!!!! Okay I'm exaggerating. He took like only 4 pieces of macaroni. But that's so many carbs!! I just sigh at him and start eating.
Spending time with Ashton is really fun. He tells a lot of the goofy things he has done with his friends throughout school and college. He tells how he was never a straight-A's student but managed decently enough. He tells me how plans to join a software company and when he has saved up enough he will go on a world tour and make a journal filled with all the pictures he'll take.
I tell him about my life too. How I had a pretty normal smooth childhood except the weight issue but that's almost insignificant now. He surprises me by giving a half-a-minute speech about inner beauty and effed up beauty standards. Seriously if for nothing else, he won my heart with this mini speech.
We also had talked about what exactly we were doing right now. I had made it very clear that I was looking for a future, he too hinted at something along those lines, but he would quickly change the topic. I'll have to one day make him talk full-fledgedly about this. We can't keep avoiding this.
After eating we head back to our building and since it's not that dark yet and we had hogged like pigs, we decide to go walking around our building. It was very breezy and quiet too. There were hardly any kids about. It was just us and that cat giving me creepy looks.
"So tell me. How many love conquests have you had so far?" I ask.
His face immediately loses its carefree look. He looks stressed.
"Is that a touchy topic? Any tragic love story? Your true love?" I ask a little jokingly.
"Hmm? No no..." He replies. I don't think he even heard what I was saying.
"Well. You tell me. How is your writing going on?" He asks me, changing the topic. Okay he definitely has an ex. And doesn't like talking about it. Store in database.
"It's going well. I sent a few pieces to some magazines. Hopefully one of them like it and takes me in right after college."
"I'm pretty sure they will. Your writing is amazing!" He smiles at me. And there go my knees.
We walk some more until our soles start aching. We head to his apartment and I'm pretty excited. This will the first time I'm going to his apartment. He's been to mine before, once when he waited for me to get ready. He commented on how nicely maintained it was. Yayy!! Brownie points to my mild, very mild OCD.
His apartment is on the 7th floor and even just in the common-area it's cool and breezy. He opens the door and we enter.
Well, his home is not nearly neat as mine but it's not very messy either. He has all the basic furniture and there are quite a lot of photographs. Mostly of his family and the places he's visited. There are a few small antiques adorning the walls and show-cases. Over-all it's a very basic but lovely place. And of course I won't tell that to him.
"I'll give this place a 7 out of 10. You could've received a 9 if it wasn't for that pile of clothes lying there. You could've done a better job." I say.
"Ooh. I'm wounded." He fake cries and heads into his bedroom. I follow him and see a typical boy's room. I haven't visited that many boy's rooms, but movies, duh!
Most of the colour schemes are of dull colour like grey and dull blue. But it all blends in very nicely. His bed is a spring one, which I hate. But I still sit on it cuz my legs are so tired. There a few more pictures on his headboard. Again there are pictures of his Mom, Dad and there's a picture of him with a girl, and they look quite.....intimate. I turn to ask him who it is and I find him staring at the picture too. Okay let me do the quick math here, carry the 1, subtract the 2, and.....that's his ex-girlfriend.
He looks kind of sad looking at the picture, almost like he wants to live those moments again. I feel a teensy bit jealous but I shake it off ( whaddup Taylor Swift) and ask him.
"Hey, who's that girl in that picture?"
He takes a deep breath before replying. "My ex. Jessie."
"Oh. What happened? Share it only if you want to." Please share the story!!
"Well, it was a little ugly. She cheated on me." His face looks so sad I want to go up and hug him. But I restrain myself.
"Oh I'm so sorry Ashton. It's just nature's way of telling that you deserve better." I smile and say.
He smiles back weakly. "Maybe. But it sure was one of the best times of my life. She was my first love. And I truly thought she would be my last too. We broke up only 3 months ago. You know......I don't think....I...no forget it."
"Ashton,...." I start.
He drops the bomb "I'm not over her yet."
"Oh. Well...so what I'm your rebound?" I ask half-jokingly.
He stares at me for a long time. He looks deep into my eyes like he's looking for the answer there.
"I.....I'm not sure. Maybe." He says pursing his lips.
I am shocked. I am quite.....shocked. I don't want to be his rebound relationship. Even after I had told him I was expecting this to go forward. He knew this wasn't just time-pass to me, but still he didn't tell anything. He wants me as his rebound?!? That really hurt.
"I really don't want you to be my rebound Kathy. You honestly mean so much more to me. Jessie held, and still does hold a very special place in my heart. And believe me I tried so much to hate her, but it was almost near impossible. But I swear I'm getting better at it. I'm not thinking so much about her nowadays." He says.
"Yeah that's a good reassurance. Ashton, you do know I'm serious about us right? I don't want to be your rebound. I want to stay with you.....for a pretty long time. Look let's just take some time off. Think about it. Think about where you want me in your life. And once you're sure, we can talk and see if this...whatever you'd like to call, is in both of our best interests." I say gulping. I feel my eyes prickling. Honestly, I shouldn't be crying. It's only been a few weeks.
Ashton sighs and says, "Yeah I guess that would be best at this moment. But honestly I had an amazing time with you Kathy."
"Me too Ashton. Bye. I'll see you....whenever you're ready. Be clear with your decision."
I turn around and walk out of his apartment. I knew the most self-respecting that I could've done would've been to slap him and walk away. But I don't see that benefitting anybody. I cared too much about him to walk off that easily. Plus he too mentioned he wanted me as more than a rebound. Hope this all goes for the best.
(A/N : This is part 2. The 3rd one will be the last to Ashton and Katherine's story. What do you think is gonna happen?)