Yamaguchi's P.O.V
I woke up to the sound of my alarm at 6 am, quick to press the snooze button, realizing that Tsukki was over and I didn't want to wake him so early.
EH? TSUKKI AND ARE ARE COMPLETLEY TANGLED! IM BASICALLY ON TOP OF HIM!
I could feel my face turn red and I slowly tried to untangle myself from Tsukki, but just as I almost pulled away he pulled me closer to him.
"Not yet, I'm comfortable." Even though Tsukki was only half awake, and it was only for a second, Tsukki slightly smiled.
Tsukki's smile is reason enough to stay here, laying on top of him, even if I'm embarrased.
After I felt Tsukki's breathing go even, I relaxed into his chest once again and let sleep take over my body.
BEEP BEEP BEEP
What the heck is that?
BEEP BEEP BEEP
Oh, its just my snooze alarm.
I pick my phone up and turn it off, pulling myself away from Tsukki, him once again pulling me back in.
"Tsukki no. We've got to get up and go to practice." I groaned
"No, i wanna lay here forever." He rolled back over and closed his eyes.
"Tsukki! If you get up now I'll buy you a dinosaur pillow!" Tsukki looks up at me.
"You promise?"
"I promise"
"Alright then." Tsukki climbs out of bed and opens my dresser drawer and pulls out his practice clothes which he left here last week.
"Are you excited to go back to practice?" I asked him.
"No. Why would I be excited to go practice with the King and his minion?"
"I don't know...just to play volleyball I guess." I looked down at my hands. I hope I didn't just accidentally put Tsukki in a bad mood.
"I used to love volleyball, Tadashi, but not anymore. I don't have the motivation to get out of bed so why would I want to play volleyball. It's just a club. I seriously can't figure out why everyone is so determined."
"O-Oh. I see. Uh...Sorry Tsukki."
Tsukki walked into the bathroom, leaving me in my bedroom to get changed.
I wonder what put him in such a bad mood all of a sudden.
*20 Minutes Later*
"Tsukki? Are you ready to go?"
"I guess" Tsukki stood up and we walked out the door together, taking the 15 minute walk to the Karasuno school campus.
Tsukki's P.O.V
I walked into the gym, already annoyed with the questions being asked about me skipping for a week.
"Oi, Tsukishima! Where have you been for a week? Huh?" Kageyama was already in my face
"Hey dumbass! You decided to skip now? Wanna fight? I'll crush you harder than those shitty boys." Tanaka rolled his sleeve up to fight.
"Hey Tsukishima, you and Asahi should start a "lets skip volleyball" club" Asahi's face went pale as Noya made that remark.
"HEY! EVERYONE STOP FOOLING AROUND AND START PRACTICING!"
"Yes Daichi" everyone murmered and left me alone to go practice.
"Hey Tsukki?" Tadashi looked up at me
"what?" I glared unintentionally.
Tadashi's face went read while saying "Uhm, I just wanted to tell you it's going to be okay. If you can just make it through this practce, we can go to the store and get you the dinasaur pillow and then you can go home and sleep, I promise."
"Thanks Tadashi." I turned my head away from him to hid the embarrassment of him having to take care of me.
"Y-You're Welcome Tsukki!" Tadashi ran off with a big smile on his face.
What was that about?
Yamaguchi's P.O.V.
Hearing Tsukki say "Thank you" to me made me so happy. I don't exactly know why it made me so happy. Probably because ever since the "incidnt" Tsukki has never been the same. His happy face went away, he stopped smiling, he stopped talking,eating,taking baths, even getting out of bed. He was mean, rude, harsh and sometimes I couldn't handle it.
Even in the times where I wanted to leave Tsukki, Atikeru would always tell me "Tadashi, don't leave him. He needs you, it may not seem like it but you're the only one keeping him together."
That was the first time in 6 months Tsukki as said the words "Thank You".
Practice went on as usual, and we spent many hours practicing the moves that would hopefully takes us to Nationals at the Spring Tournament in August. (A/N is this the right tournament? I'm pretty sure it was the spring tournament in August but I can't remember)
The end of practice came upon us quickly, and I noticed that Tsukki was already waiting at the club room for me.
I hadn't even seen him leave.
"Hey Tsukki! Are you ready to leave?" I yelled up to Tsukki.
"Yeah."
We walked to the intersection where the Shimada Mart and the road that takes us to our houses.
Should I go practice my serving tonight? Should I leave tsukki by himself? I think he will understand.
"Hey Tsukki, im gonna go practice my serves, but you go back to my house okay? I'll be there in a while." I stopped walking and Tsukki turned around.
"Yeah." Tsukki murmured.
"Okay tsukki! See you later!"
"Yeah" Tsukki turned around and put his headphone on, walking in the direction to my house.
Tsukki's P.O.V
I know Tadashi wanted me to go to his house but I just couldn't. I wasn't ready to be inside yet.
The air was warm with a slight breeze and it was perfect weather to just take a walk and think. I tuned around and started the direction I just came from.
Today was an awful day. The only good thing about it was having someone to wake up with this morning.
Why am I so sad? Why won't this permanent knot in my stomach go away? Will my heart ever feel less empty?
My thoughts had soon taken over my mind and body and before I knew it I was back at the school.
Well I might as well go to the gym and wait for Tadashi, since I'm already here.
As of the end of the Inter High, Daichi and Coach Ukai had the gym key copied for every person on the team, in case they wanted to practice outside of practice hours.
I unlocked the door and to my pleasure there was no one there.
Should I practice? No..there's no point in me practicing blocking when there's no spiker.
I closed the door and sat in the far corner of the gym, not turning the lights on.
I should tell Tadashi to meet me here when he's done so we can walk home together.
To: Tadashi ✌🏼️
Meet me in the volleyball gym when you're done practicing
I turned my phone off and closed my eyes.
It's a bit chilly in here.
I dropped my hands onto the court and felt the smoothly waxed floor.
The feeling of the court is so foreign to me now. I want to love volleyball again, I really do, but it's hard.
*Flashback*
I looked into Atikerus room to see him draped over his chair sobbing.
"Why did I spend so much time practicing when it only caused this much pain now." He sobbed and he sobbed and he sobbed.
What do I do? Do I go in there? No...he's a liar.
He turned my way and through the crack in his door, we locked eyes. I did nothing but glare at him and walk away.
Broken. Our relationships was broken. Over a stupid lie.
After that night I could never view volleyball the same. I couldn't bring myself to work as hard as the others, no matter how much I wanted to.
I want to be good. Why can't I be good? Why do I hold back on myself?
*Flashback over*
I slammed my fist onto the ground and I felt the tears coming from my eyes.
Why me? Why am I so weak? Why am I so sad? I need to be strong for Tadashi. I am the reason that he is sad again. I'm so worthless.
I hugged my knees to my chest. My breathing became weak and fragmented. I could feel myself shaking.
I hate this. I hate myself. Please let me be happy again. Please, to the monster who took over my mind, please leave me alone. I'm tired of being so sad. I'm tired of everything. Tadashi I'm sorry.
"TSUKKI! TSUKKI ARE YOU IN HERE?" Tadashi ran through the gym doors, out of breath. "TSUKKI! WHY WERENT YOU ANSWERING MY CALLS?"
Tsukki abruptly stopped yelling at me when he saw the condition I was in.
"Tsukki, can you tell me exactly what you're feeling right now? I promise I want to help you." Tadashi sat next to me on the empty, dark, volleyball court that once brought me such happiness.
"Tadashi?" I whispered, my voice cracking, "Do you want to know the truth or the lie?"
"The truth, of course Tsukki." He looked up at me with sad eyes, he knew what was coming.
"I feel..." I clenched my fists together, Tadashi wrapped his arm around me, despite me being much larger. "I feel worthless, lonely, distant, and I hate myself Tadashi" I leaned my head on Tadashi's shoulder and started to sob. "I hate everything about myself Tadashi. I hate myself I hate myself I hate myself."
I sat there for a few minutes crying into Tadashis shoulder, him pulling me in for a tighter hug every time I started to cry harder.
"Tsukki I'm so-"
"Tadashi don't." I pulled away from the hug, "I heard you last night. I know you're sad again. It's all my fault. All we had was each other and I'm a shitty friend. I'm so sorry Tadashi. I'm sorry I'm doing this to you." I fell into his grip once again, my chest tightening, and tears coming out of my eyes harder than ever before. "I'm sorry I hurt you like this. I don't even know who I am anymore. I just want to be happy again. I hate myself Tadashi. I hate myself so much. It's my fault my parents are dead! It's my fault they got killed in that car accident! It's all my fault!" I was in hysterics. I couldn't breath, I was shaking and I couldn't think straight.
"Tsukki. Tsukki. Listen to me. Deep breaths Tsukki. It's going to be alright." Despite Tsukki saying this, it was clear that he, himself was also crying. We were a mess. "Tsukki listen. Deep mis breaths in and out. Breath in and breath out. It's going to be alright."
"Tsukki I just realized you're freezing!" Tadashi let go of the hug to take off his sweater and wrap it around my shoulders. I laid my head down on his lap, both of us still sobbing.
Tadashi, stroking my hair, knowing it calmed me down, we both fell into a deep, sad, sleep together on the gymnasium floor.
Authors note
~Hola it's ya girl LOG (hehe) anyway this took me mad long to write so here you go. ENJOY YOUR TSUKKIYAMA. Ps. They're not dating, just wanted to clarify because they seem like boyfriends. Okay um I made it super long because I go back to school tomorrow and I'm gonna be posting a bunch of filler chapter this week probably. Anyway byee~