Y/N strode purposefully through the forest, her eyes fixed on the prize.
"Ow! Crap!"
Y/N strode a little more cautiously through the forest, her eyes fixed on the ground.
She didn't even know what she was searching for. Stanford had disappeared the previous day, and he could have been anywhere by now. She only knew that she couldn't stop looking.
If anything's happened to him, I'm going to kill him, she thought. I haven't supported his insane inventions for years only to have him disappear on me now.
Also, she couldn't ignore the nagging doubt in her mind, the what-if-he-left-me-on-purpose mantra that repeated itself, unwillingly, in the back of her head.
She tried unsuccessfully to shake off the troublesome thought. If I can't believe in my own father, I can't believe in anyone, she thought firmly.
The hairs on the back of her neck prickled as she noticed the sudden lack of background noises in the surrounding forest. Unlike Stanford, Y/N had been paying attention and detected the exact moment she stepped through the invisible barrier.
The floating monolith towered above her in the sky, appearing suddenly in her field of vision. She stared it down, as if the force of her gaze alone would force it to disgorge her father from its depths.
A nearly-silent whisper seemed to issue from an indefinable source. "Not another one," it complained. "Do I need to put up 'Keep Out' signs?"
"Who's there?" Y/N demanded. "Where is my father?"
The voice laughed. "So you're the scientist's brat, eh? I'm afraid he's in my custody now, so you might as well turn back now. Only death awaits you in the Fearamid."
"Quit yapping and return him this instant," Y/N said flatly, crossing her arms.
"What is with you people?" the voice whined. "Doesn't anyone listen to the 'death' part?"
"Are you giving him back, or do I have to come up there and make you?" Y/N threatened.
"Good luck getting up here by yourself," the voice retorted. "However... since you amuse me, pitiful human, I'll grant you a visit. Hold still, this might tickle..."
Y/N barely had time to close her eyes before a tremendous gust of wind knocked her off her feet. When she stood up, she was alone in a hallway of black stone. Stupid disembodied voice. So helpfully dumping me in some random spot instead of taking me straight to him. Barely pausing to take in her surroundings, Y/N picked a direction at random to begin her search.
She had nearly reached the outermost corner of the pyramid when she heard a rhythmic clicking sound. She paused to identify the noise, and was greeted by the odd sight of a tasseled footstool rounding the corner, apparently moving under its own power. To make the odd scene even more surreal, a lit candelabra appeared to be riding the footstool.
"Whoa, there!" the candelabra whooped as the footstool skidded to a halt. "Sit, Waddles!"
The footstool obediently sat. Y/N watched with a raised eyebrow as the candelabra swept her a deep bow.
"I came as soon as I received word of your arrival," it announced. "Soos the handyman, at your service."
Y/N just stared him down intently.
Soos hesitated. "Um, are you all right?" he asked. "I know a talking candlestick might come as a bit of a shock, but I assure you-"
"No, I got that part. I'm just waiting for you to stop talking and take me to my father already." Y/N crossed her arms, tapping her foot impatiently to make her point.
Soos looked rather taken aback, but it was hard to tell without a proper human face. "O-of course, miss," he stuttered. "Right this way."
He jumped back onto the footstool, which turned and bounded excitedly back the way it had come. Y/N had to half-jog to keep up as it trundled around corners and up steep stairways, the walls narrowing as they approached the top of the pyramid.
The slanted walls had nearly tapered to a point when Y/N, Waddles and Soos reached their destination. In contrast to the wide, nearly endless hallways of the lower levels, the topmost floor of the Fearamid consisted of a single room at the top of a stairway. Y/N knocked on the door, hesitated, then pushed it open.
----------------------
"My, don't you two look cozy?"
"We certainly are. Care to join us? I was just getting to the good part."
"The part with me in it, you mean?"
"Exactly."
...
"Comfy?"
"Mmm."
"Okay. I'll continue."
--------------------
"Hello there, sweetie!" Stanford greeted Y/N. He was lounging in an armchair near a cozy fireplace, sipping a drink and writing in his journal.
"Dad!" Y/N cried, rushing across the room. "Are you all right?"
"Peachy. Why?" he asked curiously.
"Oh, I don't know. Maybe because you disappeared without a word?" Y/N snapped, relief quickly curdling into anger. "I thought you were dead!"
"Sorry, honey. I was going to send you a message soon, but I've been so caught up in my research. You know how it is." He smiled apologetically but distractedly, still scribbling in his journal.
Y/N was familiar with Stanford's habit of getting absorbed in his work for days at a time, but she was less than amused. "And what kind of research, exactly, is so important that you have to disappear for days into a freaky floating building?"
He looked up at Y/N for the first time, his eyes alight with excitement. "I've hit the jackpot!" he gushed. "Bill's my ticket to unlocking the secrets of the universe!"
"Wait... who's Bill?"
Before Stanford could reply, the room darkened. The color disappeared from the woven rug on the floor and the flames in the fireplace froze in place. Y/N and Ford watched as a glowing triangle, edged with yellow flames, expanded into existence in the middle of the room. For a brief moment, Y/N could see a starry abyss inside the the triangular void, then an eye opened in the center and it resolved itself into a glowing yellow triangle with a bow tie and a top hat.
Y/N stared at it for a long moment. "Okay, exactly what are you supposed to be?"
"Y/N, this is Bill Cipher," Stanford announced. "He's the dream demon who's been helping me with my research. Bill, this is my daughter Y/N."
The eye blinked. "Wow, Fordsie, you didn't tell me your daughter was such a knockout!"
Y/N rolled her eyes. "An interdimensional triangle in a top hat, and the first thing out of his mouth is catcalls."
"You got that right!" Bill snickered. "Here, gorgeous, have a head that's always screaming!"
He materialized a screaming head and tossed it to Y/N. She caught it without flinching and smoothly drop-kicked it into the fireplace.
"Wow, not bad, kid," Bill chuckled.
Y/N rolled her eyes. "What are you doing with my dad? He doesn't look like a prisoner..." she eyed him doubtfully.
"Bill and I have a deal," Stanford informed her. "He's teaching me all the secrets of the universe!" He turned to Bill for confirmation, but Bill didn't respond.
"Yeah... about that, Sixer," Bill finally said.
Stanford frowned. "What is it?"
"I changed the rules of my Fearamid to allow one human to live here, but the thing is, I never specified which human."
"And?" Stanford said suspiciously.
"Well, to be blunt, your daughter is a lot hotter than you. And if I have to let a human live here, I'd rather have a piece of eye candy like her than some grizzled old scientist."
"What are you saying, Bill?" Stanford shouted. "You can't just trade me for her!"
"Actually, I can. And I think I will!" Bill cackled.
"Are you KIDDING ME!" Y/N screeched. "That's wrong on so many levels! I just came to find my dad! You can't force me to stay here without him!"
"That's where you're wrong," Bill corrected. "My house, my rules." He turned to Stanford. "Deal's off, Sixer. Maybe I'll let you have visitation one of these days, but for now, sayonara!"
"Bill! You can't do this! BILL!" Stanford roared as Bill snapped his stick fingers. Y/N flinched as the magic wind blew from out of nowhere, squeezing her eyes shut reflexively. When she opened them again, the color had returned to the room. The fire was once again crackling merrily, with no sign of the disembodied head.
Stanford and Bill were both gone. Y/N was alone in the room.
She stood in stunned silence for a long moment, then staggered to the armchair Stanford had vacated and sat heavily in it. Stanford's journal lay abandoned on the floor. Y/N picked it up and ran her thumb along its spine.
"What do I do now?" she asked aloud.
There was no answer from the empty room.
(A/N: Yes, I stole the last line from my other book, but I'm hardly going to report MYSELF for plagiarism, am I?
The song at the beginning is meant to be taken COMPLETELY LITERALLY. :3)