lottie
as told by char
•
My full name is Charlotte. I didn't think you knew that, or even the name that I am commonly known as, which is Char. I developed that nickname when I was young, because I was named after my grandmother who passed away before I was born, but my mother wanted me to be known as something different, something unique. The common abbreviation of the name Charlotte is Lottie, and my father know I was not a Lottie, so we took the other half of the name and it stuck.
I like it a lot. It has that feminine but tomboy-ish vibe, like I could go to an elegant ball or a football game and they would still fit the feeling of the atmosphere. I am a girly person; I like wearing skirts and painting my nails and braiding my hair, but I feel like it still makes me sound strong. Capable of as many things as any other human being.
The sad thing was that it wasn't true at all. I wasn't strong. I wasn't capable.
I was a mess, but I didn't know how to put it into words. If you asked me what was wrong, I wouldn't be able to tell you. I cried myself to sleep almost every night. I didn't know how to be happy.
But you, mystery boy on the bus, seemed as though you did. Maybe you could teach me.