How did you do this? How could you do this? Seokjin knew he'd messed up. He should have kept quiet; he should have kept Jungkook. He shouldn't have done this. He should have confessed, but he couldn't do that. Not when he kept forgetting--
Seokjin paced around in front of Jimin, who had yet to open his eyes. It was his heart. It was his heart and all Seokjin had to do was fix it. All he had to do was trap the memories and fix his heart. That's it-- that's all. But Jungkook didn't want him. Jungkook didn't want Jimin, and Jungkook didn't want Seokjin. Seokjin never thought it would turn out like this. He thought, maybe-- just maybe-- if Jungkook ever figured it out, he might accept Seokjin's feelings. He might return them. But then what? What about Jimin? Seokjin couldn't just destroy him.
Seokjin dug a hole and jumped right in; this was all his fault. What the hell had he been thinking?
Seokjin stopped pacing in front of the empty body of Min Yoongi. Min Yoongi had been quick work. His body was easy to build, his brain easy to form. He was a copy and paste of Jimin, with a slightly different body structure and a slightly different way of thinking. The only huge difference was the face, and the hair color; Min Yoongi looked nothing like Park Jimin, and his hair was black, not red. The longest thing to make was the heart-- the heart and the memories.
Seokjin didn't have enough to make a heart.
The materials he'd been provided with were from his company, and he wouldn't get those materials again for years-- years and years and years and Seokjin didn't think he had years and years and years. Seokjin had wasted and formed and used so many materials he'd been given for experimenting-- for making Park Jimin and then making Min Yoongi, and here he was, with Min Yoongi's open chest begging to be filled and a broken heart of Park Jimin that was begging to be fixed.
Jungkook didn't want Jimin back. Could Seokjin take Jimin's heart? Change the memories and maybe... maybe Yoongi could love Seokjin.
But, oh, fuck it-- Seokjin didn't want love. He didn't want an artificial love from an artificial being, no matter how real it looked or felt. And Seokjin wished he had put himself in Jungkook's shoes, in the situation, and had thought about this before he programmed Jimin to love Jungkook. Even if it was real-- so, so close to being real-- it didn't matter. It was Seokjin's love and Seokjin had filtered it through another being. Seokjin wouldn't treat Jungkook the way Jimin did. Jimin was better, but he wasn't real, and Seokjin wondered why he was just now realizing it.
Seokjin began to pace again, trying to avoid the silver heart in Jimin's chest. It just needed to be fixed. It just needed to be fixed-- fixed, fixed, fixed. That's all Seokjin had to do-- fix it. But Jungkook didn't want Jimin, but Seokjin thought he must have, because Jimin loved him and Jungkook loved Jimin and Jungkook was angry with Seokjin, not Jimin-- but Jimin was Seokjin in a purer form, and Seokjin stopped pacing again to collapse between the two dead robots and cry.
Seokjin felt destroyed. He felt like he'd destroyed himself and he felt like he'd destroyed Jungkook. He felt awful, and he felt like throwing up. He felt heavy and he felt alone. Lonely, lonely; he'd never felt so alone in his damn life.
For an hour, Seokjin sat on the floor and thought about how alone he felt, how lonely he was now that Jungkook was angry at him, and he finally stood up, rubbing his eyes; he'd made his decision. He took Jimin's heart, and he worked quick. He repaired the faults he'd forgotten to work out, and when it was finished, he stared. He had a faint thought of changing the memories-- that was easy, easy, just suck out the old ones and put in new ones, but nobody loved Seokjin and Seokjin couldn't make memories out of thin air. Not like like this-- not without years and years of work.
So Seokjin tucked the heart back into Jimin's chest, and he patched up Jimin's skin, and another hour later, he watched Jimin stir to life.
"Hyung?" Jimin asked, rubbing his eyes. He looked around the lab, and he smiled; this is what Jimin considered home. He'd been born here, so to speak. Jimin's smile was pretty, but Seokjin couldn't help but despise it. His own creation-- and he was starting to hate it.
"Go to Jungkook, Jimin." Seokjin said. He glanced at the clock. It was morning; it was early morning, but Jungkook was sure to be awake, likely getting ready for school. Seokjin moved to the door of his lab, and he gestured Jimin forward, "Go, Jimin. Go to Jungkook."
"But... hyung--" Jimin said, and Seokjin was losing patience, "I worked all night just to get you back to Jungkook, Jimin, so go."
"Hyung...." Jimin said. He moved forward, but he stopped a few feet away from the door. Seokjin had never been so intimidating before, had never been so mean with him. He was hesitant, but he spoke again, "Hyung, don't you want to keep me for a while? I-I mean... I miss it here. It's nice here. I remember talking to you lots, hyung. It was fun, right?"
Seokjin was silent for a long time, and then he shook his head, "Just go back to Jungkook, Jimin. I don't feel well, and-- and I don't want you."
Jimin was hurt by that, his head falling. He moved out of the room, avoiding eye contact with Seokjin, and he made his way back to Jungkook. He didn't know the area well, but he always knew where Jungkook was. Always, always; he would always know where Jungkook was.
Jimin came upon Jungkook's door, and he knocked softly, pulling a smile onto his hurt cheeks.
/
Later, when Jungkook had accepted Jimin in, and they'd talked about Seokjin a bit, Jungkook admitted he hadn't eaten. He was hungry, he said, but he didn't want to cook in the morning, and Jimin had come before he could even piece together what he wanted to eat.
"No worries, Kookie, I'll make you something!" Jimin said, and he jumped up off the couch, where Jungkook was lazily slumped against him. It was different, now-- just a little bit, Jimin had noticed. He hoped it was temporary, because he remembered, before the big black-out, that Jungkook had told Jimin he loved him, and he'd been so happy to get kisses at night. But now, when Jungkook was leaning against him, he barely touched him. His hands were tucked into his lap-- not around Jimin's waist or linked with Jimin's fingers like Jimin would have liked, like Jimin might have expected.
Jimin turned around and held his hand out, and Jungkook took it without hesitation, but without a smile, either. He let go when he was standing, and he brushed right past Jimin to get to the kitchen first.
Jimin wished his heart wasn't so hurt by that.
"How about some eggs, Kookie? Or some pancakes? Maybe I could make you rice and strawberries again," Jimin said as he began to pull out things he needed-- a big spoon, a pan, a bowl, a plate. Jungkook shrugged. Jimin made the decision for him. The strawberries needed to be used, so he made pancakes with strawberries and rice with sweeter strawberries-- an odd combination, but Jungkook accepted the food with a little forced smile. He was silent as he ate, and Jimin was silent as he watched.
"I still love you, Jimin." Jungkook muttered softly, maybe halfway through his breakfast. Jimin perked up, trying not to get too excited. Jungkook didn't look up as he spoke, and he was muttering through every word, but he was still speaking with a genuine tone, "I'm angry right now-- I hope you understand. I'm not angry at you, but... I am. I kind of am, because Seokjin made you from himself and--"
Jungkook paused. He put down his chopsticks and stared at his hands, "I just-- I love you, okay?"
"I love you too, Kookie." Jimin said. Jungkook looked up, "Do you?"
"I do." Jimin said confidently, and he stood up, his happy heart springing him into happy actions. He wrapped his arms around Jungkook-- one across his chest, the other around the small of his back, and it was an awkward position, but it was the only way Jimin could hug him so quick-- without having to turn his body or wait for Jungkook to face him. Jungkook accepted the hug despite how awkward the position was; all he could do was hold onto Jimin's forearm. Jimin felt a few tears splash against his artificial skin, but he ignored them in favor of comforting Jungkook silently, hugging him tight and kissing the back of his head.
"Thank you for breakfast, hyung. Do you want some--? Oh," Jungkook wiped his tears quickly, so Jimin wouldn't notice-- but Jimin did. And he let out a little chuckle, and it seemed genuine, so Jimin didn't bring up the tears, "I'm sorry, I forgot-- you can't eat."
"No, I can't." Jimin laughed, too. He returned to his seat across from Jungkook, and he picked up the chopsticks. He scooped up some rice, held it to Jungkook's mouth, "But I can feed you."
"I forgot how young I feel when you're here." Jungkook muttered, taking the rice into his mouth. He chewed for a moment, and Jimin spoke as he did, "Already forgetting about me, Kookie? I haven't been gone long... have I?"
"Just a few days." Jungkook said, and Jimin pouted, "Yeah-- you already forgot within a few days? I'm hurt."
Jungkook shrugged, lowered his gaze, "I guess I just... focused too much on bad stuff for a while. You died, and... Seokjin-hyung...."
Jimin waited for Jungkook to say something-- maybe he knew why Seokjin was so upset. Jimin knew it was more than not having slept, but he didn't ask because Seokjin kicked him out and the last thing Seokjin wanted to do was upset him more. But Jungkook didn't say anything further-- not about Seokjin, not about anything. He took his chopsticks back from Jimin and continued eating silently, occasionally digging into his pancakes with his spoon. Jimin let him eat in silence, and he pretended not to notice Jungkook shed a few more tears. He figured Jungkook could use the silence, could use the lack of Jimin-worry. He'd had enough these past few days (Jimin imagined).
"I'm going to go to my class." Jungkook said suddenly, pushing away from the table. Jimin watched him began to put dishes in the sink, listened to him mumble, "I already missed most of my morning classes, but... but.... I'm going to go to class. I've missed too much."
"Okay, Kookie. Have fun... can I help you with anything?" Jimin asked. Jungkook shook his head. He turned to leave the room, but he paused, and he turned back to Jimin. Jimin watched him walk forward, and he closed his eyes when Jungkook leaned in real fast, giving him a quick, quick peck.
"I'll be back later." Jungkook muttered, and then he was gone. Upstairs, to grab his bag, change into a decent outfit-- out the door without looking at Jimin again, but Jimin could still feel the ghost of Jungkook's lips and he was plenty okay with just that.
- - -
A/N: Well, it wasn't three months....
I'm sorry, guys. It's been forever I'm so lazy