Two
Fifteen years earlier
The Hamptons, Long Island, New York
Swimswimswim
Eyes fixed on the dock, the chant rang on and on in Amber’s head. She’d lost sight of her paddleboard ages ago, swept away by the Sag Harbor current. Crap, she was so getting in trouble for this.
Mom’s gonna kill me if I drown.
A fresh slice of panic surged. How was she going to marry Parker now if she died? At the stupid age of twelve.
Jeez, she’d never even been kissed before! Frowning, she paddled harder. She should have played Spin the Bottle at Nancy Kruger’s last month. Okay, so Amber probably would have been stuck kissing Jimmy Stevens, better known as lizard tongue, but at least she wouldn’t be drowning with virgin lips. An epically lame end to the suckage that was her life.
All except for Parker.
Parker.
So what if he was in the eleventh grade and she was only in sixth. She’d loved him since she was eight years old. He’d briefly been replaced with Justin Timberlake from ’N Sync, but even she knew that was pretty unlikely to happen. And Parker was cuter. She wanted to marry him so bad that she’d picked out her wedding dress ages ago. Course, it had taken her four months to whittle it down to her top five favorites. Her obsession with tulle and satin and lace was growing pretty strong. This summer, in a fit of boredom, she’d planned the whole ceremony.
Reese would have been her maid of honor cuz she was Parker’s half sister and Amber’s sort-of friend.
Stupidstupidstupid
Sneaking off and forgetting the life vest. But she’d really really wanted to get better on the paddleboard.
Mostly cuz she wanted to impress Parker. Last summer he’d taught her how to stand and maneuver a turn, but this summer he was more interested in kissing Susie Frances. Amber scowled. And he never helped her bait a hook or capture crabs anymore.
The current was scarily strong, and the dumb dock was slipping farther away. The chill from the water seeped deeper with every passing minute, despite how hard Amber swam. Teeth chattering, her arms and legs grew heavy. So much so it was a struggle to control them now.
A sob ripped from her throat, and she fought back the fear, closing her eyes.
Giveupgiveupgiveup
Her muscles screamed for a break, her lips quivering, the taste of salt a mix of seawater and frustrated tears.
The furious pounding of her heart was now just as much about terror as tiredness, and she was sure her chest was gonna explode.
Her thoughts began to drift and grow foggy. She knew there was something she was supposed to be doing.
Swimming? Finding Reese?
‘Amber!’
The call shook her out of her daze. God, she really was drowning. Was she already in heaven? Now she was hearing Parker calling out her name.
The voice grew closer, the tone urgent. ‘Amber.’
Exhausted, she turned and spied Parker sprawled on his board, sleeves pushed to his elbows as he paddled toward her like a madman. She sucked in a breath, getting a mouthful of salt water that burned her throat, and she coughed and gagged, slipping beneath the surface.
The cold closed over her head and she stopped fighting for a moment. It was peaceful. Quiet. And she was so, so tired; it was nice not to fight so hard to keep her head above water.
She drifted, floating, until an arm circled around her chest and heaved her up. She had a vague sensation of being hauled onto something hard, but she couldn’t move. It took too much effort to breathe.
And then there were lips on hers and warm breath filling her lungs and she had an overwhelming urge to cough again. She rolled, gagged and then threw up a bunch of salt water that stung as much coming up as going down.
Shattered, she collapsed again, drifting in and out, only half-aware as Parker paddled the board for shore and dragged her up on the beach.
That was when the shivering started for real. Water dripped down his nose as Parker gathered her close, fear making deep lines in his forehead. She gazed up at him, dazed, her heart pounding from the feel of his arms cradled around her. The feel of his breath, Parker’s breath, on her cheek was awesome. But the close-up of his face was just…was just… And as she blinked, her mind clearing,
it hit her.
Parker had kissed her!
Her heart fluttered like a hummingbird stuck in a cage. Okay, true, it was more like he’d given her mouth to mouth, but still… She closed her eyes, remembering the hard press of those soft lips she’d been obsessing about for years. Pressed against hers.
OMG…it was almost worth drowning for.
His dark blond hair looked brown when wet. A smattering of freckles bridged his nose, and thick lashes framed the prettiest pair of green eyes in the history of ever. Eyes that always did funny things to her stomach when they locked on hers. Used to be they’d look at her with patience and, when she was really lucky, a hint of fondness. Now that Parker had gotten older there was a lot of irritation. But it wasn’t her fault his mother made him watch out for her and Reese when Amber’s mom wasn’t around.
She clutched his arm. ‘You can’t tell my mom,’ she croaked out.
‘Aw, come on, Amber.’ Parker’s face scrunched up tight.
‘You nearly freakin’ died.’
‘I did not.’
He rolled his eyes in that ever-sarcastic ‘yeah, right’ way of his. ‘What if you get sick or something?’ he said.
‘She needs to know.’
And be grounded? Amber had been looking forward to summer vacation for months. As the daughter of Ms. Michael’s personal assistant, Amber had practically grown up in the Michaels’ home. Parker never visited his mother in the city anymore, so summer at the Hamptons was the only time she got to see him.
She pulled harder, panicking now. ‘If you tell, I’ll—I’ll—’
Her mind sputtered as she scrambled to come up with a good threat. And then a memory filled her mind. A vision of Parker, lids rimmed red, sniffing as she stumbled on him down by the dock. He’d yelled at her, of course, scrubbing at his face as he’d told her to scram. As always, her heart hurt when Parker got that look in his eyes. And the only person in the world that could make Parker that upset was his mother. It had been a long time since she’d seen him sad about his mom. Lately, his reactions more often resembled anger.
She straightened up. ‘I’ll tell Susie Frances that I caught you crying like a baby.’
His gaze flashed to hers. ‘I was not crying,’ he said. ‘I got salt water in my eyes, is all.’
They both knew it was a lie, and she fought the temptation to look away. This was too important.
‘Fine,’ he said. And then he jabbed a finger in front of her face. ‘But you have to stop the creepy stalker stuff.’
Heat flaring up her face, she was horrified by the words. Had she been that obvious?
Suddenly, she wished she’d been swallowed up by the waters of Sag Harbor. ‘Fine,’ she said, mimicking him.
But then her bravery ran out, her voice growing small. ‘I don’t suppose we can find the paddleboard?’
Parker stood, and right away she missed the heat of his skin. He swiped a hand through his hair, leaving it spikier than usual. ‘The board’s long gone.’
Jeez, it all seemed so unfair. Blinking back the tears, she looked across the water. Petrified Parker would see her cry, she dragged her hand across her eyes and sniffed.
Another shiver racked her body, and the rustle of clothing brought her attention back to Parker.
He’d taken off his hoodie. ‘Don’t worry about it, Ace,’ he said gruffly, pulling his sweatshirt down over her head.
Her heart soared, both from the touch and the words and the protective tone in his voice. And she’d always adored his nickname for her. She jabbed her arms into the damp sleeves, savoring the heat from his body, the smell of Parker.
‘I’ll take the blame for the board.’ Those too-beautiful lips flattened grimly. A dark look crossed his face. ‘My mom already hates me, anyway.’
A needle pricked her heart, the sharp pain familiar.
Ms. Michael was all Reese Reese Reese, spoiling her daughter rotten. But Parker? He barely even existed in the Michael household. No wonder he chose to live with his dad.
‘Thanks,’ she said, hoping she wasn’t tearing up like a baby again.
His lopsided smile appeared, leaving her weak in the knees as he said, ‘Let’s get you home.’
Parker gripped his whiskey glass.
Amber Davis.
Discovering the redhead’s identity had been like a cattle-prod shock to Parker’s nervous system, his mind reeling with the memories of his youth. He struggled to ignore the beautiful woman who’d trailed after him as a kid, hanging on his every word. His every move. The one who’d witnessed his most humiliating moment.
You were a mistake.
Tossing back the rest of his drink, he tried to focus on his goals for tonight. Avoid his mother at all costs, speak to Reese and tell her no and then get the heck out of here.
Attention firmly on him, Amber asked, ‘Do you remember—?’
‘Yeah,’ he said gruffly, fixing his eyes on his empty glass. No way was he letting her finish that question. ‘I remember.’
He could feel Amber’s gaze, but he needed a minute to adjust. Several of them, actually. Because he sure as hell wasn’t ready to face the lady who, years ago, had found him sniffling like a wussy little girl.
Thank God for his cell phone.
Parker glanced at the incoming number flashing in time with the vibration, answering with his pat ‘What’s up, Robby boy?’
‘Why aren’t you at Rosie’s Bar?’
Parker let out a discontented grunt, longing for the bar that was the watering hole for most of the fifty-seventh precinct. His gaze swept across the elegantly attired guests at the restaurant, the fancy venue most likely chosen for its bird’s-eye view of Manhattan. The only bright spot had been the pretty redhead that he’d known was too sweet and all kinds of wrong for him.
Resisting a little harmless flirting had been impossible.
But, man, was that ever a freakin’ mistake.
‘I’m busy,’ Parker said to his partner as he shot a look at Amber.
Creamy skin, wide mouth and eyes the color of maple syrup. Her auburn hair was pulled back in some sleek knot that looked more professional than dressy. If he’d known she was gonna turn into a stunning redhead, he might have actually paid more attention. But she had been all knobby kneed, gap-toothed, with gangly arms and legs. A quiet kid.
A lamb among wolves at the Michael household.
He’d always felt a little sorry for her, a bit protective.
Some of that had been drilled into him, to watch over Reese and Amber when Amber’s mother couldn’t. And more than anyone, he knew how it felt to be an outsider in the Michael household.
Now Amber was gorgeous, but there was still a lingering sense of the innocent openness that she’d had as a child. He could see it in her clear, honest eyes, the face that left everything on display. Parker couldn’t remember ever being innocent.
Had stopped believing in innocence long ago.
Gaze locked with the redhead’s, Parker spoke to Rob, who was waiting patiently on the other end of the phone.
‘Trust me,’ he said. ‘I’d rather be spilling a beer with my partner at Rosie’s Bar than at this fancy restaurant.’
‘Get your butt down here,’ Rob said.
‘Sorry, Robby boy.’ Christamighty was Parker sorry he was here instead of there. ‘Got something I’ve got to do first.’
There was a long pause on the end of the phone. ‘This isn’t about the Miller case, is it?’ Rob asked.
Parker’s insides felt as if they’d been hooked to two tractor trailers racing in opposite directions. Shoulders tense, he rolled them back. ‘No,’ he said, careful to keep his voice casual. ‘I’ve done this job long enough that nothing shocks me anymore.’
He knew his partner thought the turn of events had affected him. Was worried, somehow, that Parker was burning out on all they dealt with day to day. But he was more disturbed by the fact that he wasn’t affected. The latest case had taken a twisted turn that most people could never fathom and, yet, Parker hadn’t felt a speck of shock. Zip, zilch, nada.
The hollow darkness surrounding his heart expanded, and Parker refused to admit how much it scared the hell out of him.
Rob cleared his throat on the other end of the phone.
‘I hate that our number one suspect is a teen, especially given his parents are total dirtbags,’ he said.
Parker huffed in agreement. ‘Yeah, sometimes family sucks.’
Eyebrows tenting at his words, Amber frowned.
And as he said goodbye to Rob, Parker let out a sigh and addressed the redhead. ‘You got something you want to say?’
‘Just wondering if you’ve spoken with your sister yet,’
Amber said.
‘Haven’t had the time.’
‘Haven’t made the time.’
As if on cue, a feminine voice called his name, and he turned to face Reese. She was crossing the hardwood floor in a cocktail dress, her blond hair in a delicate twist.
‘Be nice,’ Amber whispered.
Parker frowned. ‘I’m always nice.’
As Reese drew closer, he slipped his phone in his jacket, bracing for the upcoming conversation. Confronting his sister and telling her no appeared to be the only way to get her off his case. Emails hadn’t worked. The phone calls had been a failure. Seemed the only way to get her to accept his no was a face-to-face conversation.
You can do polite.
But when Reese went to hug him, for a moment he panicked. Freakin’ panicked. A master at deflection, he shifted on his feet, subtly placing his shoulder forward, blocking her attempt. Fortunately she interpreted his body language accurately and abandoned her attempt.
He didn’t do public displays of affection.
He’d learned long ago not to do affection period.
‘I’m glad you came,’ Reese said with a small smile. ‘I hope this means you’ve changed your mind about the wedding.’
Parker bit back the urge to say hell, no.
Now that she was getting married to her supposed dream guy, Reese was suddenly all ‘peace on earth, good will toward men.’ More persistent in her insistence they pretend they were a real family. They lived in the same town and hadn’t seen each other in two years.
Mostly his fault, sure, but still…
‘I came to talk to you in person,’ he said.
‘And to catch up with old friends?’ Reese said.
His sister shot the redhead at his side a curious look before addressing Parker.
‘So…’ Reese said. ‘Are you and Amber setting an appointment time for you to get measured for your tux?’
Parker’s lips quirked in surprise as he slid his gaze back to Amber. She was watching him as if assessing his every move, the beautiful woman’s attention sending a thrilling shimmy down his spine. Amber was supposed to measure him for his tux?
Interesting notion, but not enough to get him to change his mind.
‘Come on, Reese,’ he said, trying to be the diplomat he wasn’t. ‘Can you really picture me in a monkey suit?’
How many more times did he have to say no?
He wasn’t a part of the Michael family, had never been welcomed. And at the age of thirty-two he wasn’t going to start pretending now.
‘Of course we want you there,’ Reese said. ‘You’re my brother —’
‘Half brother,’ he said bluntly, knowing he sounded callous and trying to care. ‘With emphasis on the half.’
Amber briefly touched the back of his hand and flashed him a disapproving look, and he chose to ignore the warning and the stimulating warmth of her touch, the fleeting feel of soft fingers. Reese eyed him warily.
As if, after knowing him forever, she was still trying to figure him out.
Yeah, well…good luck with that one. He was still working on that himself.
‘Listen,’ he said. ‘I’m happy that you’re happy that you and that fiancé of yours are finally tying the knot.’ He did his best not to scoff out loud. ‘Not that I believe in the whole marital thing. But you know, to each his—or her—own delusion.’
‘Parker,’ Reese said gently, and he hated the worried look in her eyes. ‘Love isn’t a delusion.’
‘Oh, yeah?’ Parker screwed up his face, hoping he looked more doubtful than like the caustic bastard that Jessica had called him before breaking it off. After four months, a real record for him, it was almost a relief to have her gone. ‘If I remember right—’ he studied his sister ‘—you’ve pledged ‘till death do you part’ before.’
Amber’s fingers returned to his wrist, gripping him hard. The contact briefly short-circuited his brain, bringing to mind better reasons she could be holding on to him so tight.
Not your type, Robinson. Not your type. He discreetly pulled his wrist from Amber’s clasp.
‘Mason was your ex’s name, wasn’t it?’ Parker said, lifting a brow at his sister.
Pink staining her cheeks at the mention of her first husband, Reese ignored his comment. ‘Being in the wedding doesn’t mean you’re endorsing the institution.’
He plowed a hand through his hair, not caring if it stuck out in all directions. ‘Reese—’
‘Please,’ she said, her face the picture of sincerity.
‘You’re family.’
Every muscle in his gut tensed with the hit. As far as he was concerned, his family died the day his father had passed away.
And the void that had started with his mother’s you were a mistake had grown through the years, only to expand to unbelievable depths the day his dad had died.
Since then he’d felt numb, as if nothing touched him.
Detached. A black hole that threatened to consume everything.
Amber shifted slightly on her feet, and his eyes went of their own volition to land, again, on the pretty tagalong from his youth. She pressed closer until their shoulders brushed, a distracting touch. But she was giving him an emphatic stare that screamed Don’t you dare break her heart.
Because Reese didn’t deserve it, not really.
It had taken him years as an adult to realize that his sister wasn’t responsible for the way their mother had treated him. That Reese’s precious-princess status in the Michael household was her parents’ doing, and not his sister’s. She’d been a clueless, pampered kid adored by her mom and dad. And wasn’t that the way life was supposed to work?
But Parker Robinson wasn’t a fake. He puffed out a breath. At this point, he was just gonna have to let her be disappointed when he didn’t show up for the Big Day.
‘I told you,’ Parker told his sister. ‘Dylan needs to pick someone else for his fifth groomsman.’
Parker headed for the elevators, and Amber spied the crestfallen look on Reese’s face.
‘He’s never going to say yes,’ Reese said.
Amber hated seeing her so down. Helping her childhood friend plan her dream day—complete with a reunion with her three college roommates as bridesmaids—was vital. Because she’d watched Reese work hard at her marriage to Mason, had seen how devastated she was when it failed. It had been painful to watch her friend suffer.
Reese deserved her happily ever after with Dylan.
‘Parker will say yes,’ Amber said. ‘Because deep down he knows you care about him.’
‘You care about him, too,’ Reese said with a knowing look in her eye.
Her stomach lurched. ‘That was a long time ago.’
‘And you’re both grown-ups now,’ her friend said, tone riddled with subtext.
Shooting Reese a look, Amber said, ‘Anyone who chooses to get involved with Parker is a glutton for punishment.’
She cast an eye at the man as he waited for the elevator. ‘And I don’t chase men.’
‘No,’ Reese said with a sigh. ‘You just sit back and let life pass you by.’
‘Hey,’ Amber protested. ‘Romance will happen when it’s good and ready.’
Her mom had always said loving her father had been easy. Reese and Dylan’s relationship always looked effortless, too. They were the perfect couple. Amber’s other friends chased love as if it were something to be hunted down and captured, torturing themselves in the process.
Amber knew when she met the right man, love would happen naturally.
Until then, she’d help others plan their perfect day.
Reese let out a hunh. ‘Maybe you should be more proactive in getting what you want.’
‘Listen,’ Amber said, changing the subject. ‘I’ll talk to Parker about the wedding.’ Amber gave her friend a hug.
‘You go find Dylan and enjoy the rest of the party, okay?’
Heart pounding, Amber followed in Parker’s path. But who was she, really, to try to convince Parker Robinson of anything?
The elevator doors were beginning to shut, and Amber picked up her pace and slid inside just before they closed.
Tension bounced off the walls, making the space feel especially small.
Parker sent her an overly tolerant look. ‘Did Reese send you to try to change my mind?’
‘No,’ Amber said truthfully. She knew she needed to ease her way into this conversation. Years of resentment weren’t going to be undone with a one-minute elevator ride. ‘I was hoping you could give me a lift home.’
He straightened up and stared at her.
‘Are you coming on to me?’ he said. There was no seductive tone. He actually sounded amused by the thought.
Amber sent him a disgusted look she didn’t feel. And why did he find the idea funny? ‘No,’ she said. ‘Will you give me a ride, anyway?’
‘I’ll give you a ride because you’re not coming on to me,’ he said. Before she had time to process the unsatisfying words, Parker pushed the button and went on.
‘Where do you live?’ he asked.
‘In a loft above my shop,’ she said. ‘Down under the Manhattan Bridge overpass.’
An emotion she couldn’t quite place swept up his face.
‘I would have thought Reese wouldn’t be caught dead in a shop anywhere other than on Fifth Avenue itself.’
Affection flared across her heart. Reese’s wedding to Dylan Brookes was one of the social events of the year.
The Michaels and the Brookeses were two of the most prominent families in the city. Handling the account was going to put her shop on the map, and she would forever be grateful for her friend’s business and her trust.
‘Reese has changed,’ Amber said as they exited the elevator.
She knew that better than anybody. ‘I know she was a little oblivious as a teen…’
Parker chuckled at the understatement, though there was no malice in the sound.
They entered the lobby and Parker held the door open for her, and Amber passed through onto the busy, nighttime sidewalk. Traffic whooshed by, the smell of rain heavy in the air.
‘Honestly, I don’t care how much she’s changed.’ And as he gave his ticket to the valet, he shot Amber a sharp look. ‘I’m not convinced this thing with her and Dylan is even real.’
‘You’re just cynical about relationships in general,’ Amber said with a small scoff. ‘Everyone knows they’re perfect for each other.’
‘Regardless,’ Parker said. ‘I’m not going to be in her wedding.’
Heart shifting lower in her chest, Amber curled her fingers in her hand, determined to change his mind by the end of the ride home.
No matter what it took.
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