Harley
Gravel and twigs crunched under Harley's shoes. With each step her chest seemed to get tighter and tighter. She felt like she'd suddenly been cast underwater, trying to breathe in an environment without enough oxygen. Beside her, Ben ran a hand through his caramel hair, his face carefully blank. "Harley..."
He knew where she was leading him. He had to. Ben was a smart guy, he'd probably known the second she started their hike. It had been thirty minutes since they'd pulled over to the side of the road and stepped into the trees. Harley's feet had begun a fierce ache after the first mile.
Not much farther. She could feel it in her bones. "Almost there."
"Are you sure you want to do this?"
No. But somehow it might help. Might give her the closure she didn't realize until now she needed. "It's something I need to do eventually."
"I don't get why you'd want me here. Did you ask Will?"
A crooked tree branch cut into her path. Ben pulled it out of the way so she could move forward. "Thanks." When the green, vibrant trees started thinning out, she finally replied, "I didn't. Ask, that is.Will has his own connections to this place and I'm not going to make him face his own demons so he could help me face mine."
"What if he wants to help?"
What if he didn't? "This might be better done alone."
Ben mumbled something under his breath.
They reached their destination. Harley stumbled forward, caught off guard, an action that had Ben placing a hand on her arm to steady her. She scanned the area, her breath catching painfully in her chest. She'd thought it was farther. That she'd have more time.
The clearing was rather large, almost completely cut off from civilization. A single overgrown path served as an exit--or a driveway. What was once a pretty, expansive grass backyard was now a mixed-up mass of weeds and knee-deep grass. The shrubs and trees near the edges of the clearing leaned inward, expanding, seeing how far they could go without punishment.
She'd thought doing this during the day would make it easier, but somehow the sunlight casting through the trees gave a harsh view to the scene before her.
Among the grass lay all the rubble. Nothing but a charred black frame was left of the house. On the right side, the foundation tilted as if it wanted to fall apart. Pieces of the structure lay about--a slim pipe here, a brick there.
Harley made herself take slow steps forward. She stepped over blackened beams, large shards of glass, a partially melted plastic knob from the stove.
Ben whistled lowly behind her. "I thought they had this all cleaned up. They told me it was."
"It is." Her voice sounded hollow to her own ears. "All the personal items are gone."
She'd found a chunk of the counter, the leg of a chair. Yet no picture frames, no bicycles or ceramic plates. The fire afterward couldn't have eaten absolutely everything. She'd have to ask Alpha Mark about where it all went. Probably in a storage unit that had been listed under her assets. A list she'd tried hard not to read.
The remains of what was once her life lay around her: what was and what could have been. She reached down to grab the chunk of wood near her foot. It was a dark wood--painted maroon--with black around the edges and a hinge dangling from the edge by a single screw. A piece of their front door. She remembered, dimly, her mother spending an afternoon painting it while she sat on the porch, playing with her puppy stuffed animal.
From there her brain fired off with other pictures--her father coming home late from work and wrapping his strong arms around her mother's waist, Mathias and Willie throwing a little white ball around the yard, her father sitting down at the table to help with her homework, him calling her his "beautiful genius."
The memories became heavy, like a thick blanket wrapped around her shoulders. She lowered herself to the ground.
Sitting here, among the remnants of the past, somehow made it all real. Really, truly real. She could wake up and go through the motions of playing life, but that grief continued to lurk in the background. It would accumulate and build unless she came to terms and let it go.
She'd take it all back if given the choice--her parents, her brother, their cottage in the meadow. Yet that wishing was dangerous. If she wished too much, it would only fuse that grief tighter to her chest.
Near silence filled the meadow. Except for the distant chatter of birds and the buzz of cicadas, the air was quiet. Even the wildlife realized the gravity of the area.
"My dad used to love the cicadas," Harley said, her thumb kept tracing a groove in the piece of wood. "It drove my mother crazy."
Ben sat down slowly next to her. His movements were careful, as if she were an animal he was afraid to startle. "That he liked cicadas?"
Surprisingly, her lips curved into a smile. "No. The actual cicadas. She used to say they were demons with wings. In the summer, when they were out, she'd make us keep all the windows closed because the constant buzzing annoyed her. But my dad would come home and open all the windows just to hear them."
"I bet that pissed her off."
She nodded. "It did. Until my dad explained his reasoning. He said that was their way of singing--to find their true love. And if they were quiet, the bugs would never find their mates. It's their way of asking a female "out" so to speak." Ben's shoulder pressed to hers and she leaned on it, resting her head. She'd seen pack members do it many times to others, showing silent support. "It also helps that their singing would keep away any birds that hunt during the day. My mom was convinced, eventually, that it helped her garden."
Harley rubbed the heel of her palm across her chest. That sadness was there, but behind it...nostalgia. She'd had a great family. A happy home. Something not many people experienced in their whole lives. And though she might not have again all that she once had, she did have a chance to make a new start. A new happy home.
With Cam, Ben, Bailey, Natalie.
With Will.
I can do this, mom. Dad. I'll make myself a place here, you'll see.
And the first step to doing that sat right next to her. "About what happened this week--"
"Har, you don't have to--"
"I shut myself out for a while because I was scared you guys thought I was seeking sympathy all the time." She threw out the words, ripping the explanation quick like velcro.
Ben's eyebrows came together. "What? Where would you get that?"
Jamie. "It was dumb. I see that now," she said, "and it won't happen again."
They sat in silence for awhile. She used the time to take in more of the details she remembered. The freshness in the air, mingled slightly with the wildflowers that popped up just beyond the trees to the east. The hssh as the leaves on the trees brushed each other in the wind.
It was peaceful--she'd forgotten just how much. And quiet. There wasn't any loud accelerating cars or highway noise. No booming conversations. Even the bugs were--
Her fingers locked tight around Ben's arm. "Ben."
"What?"
Then his frame tensed up, noticing the same thing. "The cicadas."
The two shot to their feet. "What does it mean when they go quiet?"
She had to swallow her heart down to speak. "Predators."
Ben hauled her to her feet fast, and Harley almost dropped the piece of the door in the process. "We have to go. Now."
They were in motion before Ben finished the last word. At a dead run, Harley and Ben rushed for the car. Ben, being full werewolf, had to drag Harley by the hand. She tried to keep up. She did! Yet even after all the training she'd been doing, it hadn't been enough to keep up with him.
She followed Ben's lead--jumping over larger branches, side-stepping stones. "Ben! What about the trail?" She said through quick breaths.
But Ben shook his head, yanking more on her hand, "It's on us. I can hear it."
Shit. They broke through another section of trees, the green whirling past her peripheral vision. A mile. The car was almost a mile and a half away. They'd never make it. "Ben--"
"I know."
Damn it, damn it, damn it. If she'd just had Ben drive all the way up to the house, this wouldn't have happened. But she hadn't been sure if the driveway had been blocked off, or would be there in the first place. With all the nature around, she'd been sure the tree roots, broken branches, and weeds would lay claim to it.
Twigs snapped under her sneakers. Above, birds took off, racing away. Her lungs burned, but she kept going.
It all felt the same. The running. The icy fear of getting caught. It made her sick to her stomach. She wouldn't get out this time. She wouldn't make it.
But that didn't mean Ben couldn't.
"Ben," she said on a gasp, "keep going. Get to the car."
His grip tightened on her hand. "That's what I plan on."
They vaulted over a fallen tree. The ground was at slant now, and she had to focus not to skid along the dirt. "I'll distract him. It. Whatever it is." Even though the panic threatened to tunnel her vision, she'd do what she could.
"Fuck that!" Ben ducked under a slender branch. Harley barely got under it before it hit her.
"It's what we're supposed to do." If it was a wolf. If there was one thing Will taught her in training, it was that if confronted by a wolf, running was a bad option. And what were they doing now?
Running.
"Ben, you know...I'm right."
"Then I'll do it."
The idea of Ben, an Omega, getting hurt made every muscle in her body tense. "Hell no."
"Har--"
Something plowed in from the right, colliding with Harley. She screamed, half-turned to meet the thing head on, got her back slammed into a tree.
"Harley!"
She screwed her eyes shut, bracing for pain.
Nothing.
A low snarl, like a chainsaw revving. Then a full, guttural, wolf bark. Warm weight pressed into her thighs and her eyes popped open.
A tan and white wolf pressed it's flank into her, growling at Ben. Disbelief spread like liquid fire through her. It was the wolf. The rogue wolf.
"Ben--"
"Shh." Ben had his hands in front of him, his head lowered, eyes on the ground. A calmness entered the air and almost suddenly, Harley wanted to throw herself over Ben and protect him.
The wolf's growl died. Then he whimpered and, hesitantly, stuck his muzzle at Ben's hand.
"How did you--?"
"I'm okay." Ben assured, more to the wolf. "We're okay."
It was an Omega thing. It had to be. She'd never had such a sudden urge to protect someone before. And she was latent.
Then the wolf whirled, it's ears lowered back, and snarled at the direction they'd come from.
Quicker than she could really process, Ben lurched to the side. There was a click and a thud. "Motherfucker," Ben hissed, his eyes big at the tree next to him.
The wolf whined.
"Run." Ben snapped into motion, reaching for her.
He stopped, mid action. Another click--something shot passed her, cut through the air and--
Ben's eyes rolled back. He dropped, limp, to the ground. "Ben!"
She couldn't focus. Everything needed to slow down. She couldn't keep up. But then the wolf barked again and pushed her away from Ben, towards the car. "Ben, I can't--" she wanted to explain to the wolf. She couldn't leave him. And she wasn't strong enough to carry him.
The rogue snapped at her, pushing, showing his teeth. Those same teeth bit light around her calf and yanked her down. She fell.
Just as another dart hit the tree above. Right where her neck had been.
"I can't leave him," she chanted at the wolf, "I can't leave him. I can't leave him."
Footsteps broke through the woods. The wolf whined and snarled and yanked at her shirt. Trying to get her to go, trying to save her.
I can't leave him.
She had to.
"Ben." She choked out his name, her vision watering up. But she bit down the sob, kissed his forehead, and unsteadily got to her feet.
Harley ran.