Chapter 11
Seb and I started out at one of the most exclusive boutiques. It was strange being back home and shopping at places like this. At the boarding school when we were allowed off campus we would go shopping at the department stores. The experience between those stores and boutiques like this was extraordinary. I used to come to places like this with my mother, and when she passed away I came to such places with Carrie.
As soon as we walked into the building, the sales associates, who were all women, rushed to our sides. Or I should say they rushed to Seb's side. Even though it was a women's boutique none of them paid attention to me.
Since they ignored me, I left them chatting up to Seb and went to go look around the store. I was impressed by the way it was organized. The dresses were not only in one area, but they were organized by color.
I ran my fingers through the chiffon fabric on a purple dress.
"I think you would look amazing in a blue dress." A voice told me. I turned around to as striking red head. I hadn't seen her earlier when I had come in.
"Hi, I'm Ebony. I'm a sales associate." She said sticking out her hand.
"Hi Ebony, I'm Ana." I introduced my self.
Ebony smiled, "With your eyes, hair and that beautiful tan I think you would look stunning in blue." She started walking towards the blue section.
"If there is another color you want to try just let me know." She said as she grabbed a few dresses off the rack.
"I love blue." I told her.
"Great." She said and then laughed, "oops, I forgot to ask is this for a special occasion?"
I smiled with her and felt my cheek heat up a little, "my birthday party."
"Oh fun! Well then let's find you a dress that will demand some attention." Once she had a hand full of dresses she turned to me. "Let's get started on these." She said heading towards the dressing area. Each dressing area had its own small podium, full length mirrors and couches for people to sit in while they waited.
"Oh I almost forgot are you wearing a strapless bra? Or would you like me to get you one?" She asked as she placed the dresses neatly into a dressing room.
Fortunately I had put on my own bra at home. "I'm good thank you."
"Okay well I'll just be here so once you have the dresses on you can come out and we can look at you in those gorgeous mirrors out there." She said and closed the door behind her.
The first dress I put on was a halter neck. It was a high low dress that had shimmery fabric. I wasn't a fan of it on the hanger but I figure I can't dismiss it without even trying it on.
I stepped out of the dressing room and went to stand on the podium. I looked down to see how the fabric moved around me as I walked.
"No."
I snapped my head up and saw Seb relaxed on the couch with a glass of orange juice in his hand. I was a little embarrassed to have him watch me as I tried on dresses, but I knew there was nothing I could do about it. It also hurt a little that he didn't like the dress on me.
I scowled at him, "I haven't even seen how I look in it."
I turned to the mirror and frowned. The color was beautiful but the dress itself was a little bulky.
"It's too gaudy." Seb told me, and went back to looking at the TIMES magazine next to him.
I made a face at him and headed back to the fitting room. The next dress was a darker blue, with lace sleeves. It was a baby doll dress with a blue slip underneath with lace fabric on top. I liked the feeling of the lace on me. I wished there was a mirror in the dressing room so I could look at myself before going out in front of Seb.
I sighed to myself and headed out into the dressing area. This time Seb was too immersed in the magazine to notice when I walked in so I quickly turned to look at the mirror.
The dressed looked really pretty on, but it was more of a weekend out with friends than birthday party dress.
"That looks fine." Seb said finally noticing that I had come out. I made another face at him.
"Since you and Carrie decided that I should have a big party, I don't think 'fine' will be sufficient." I said leaving the dressing area once again.
I went back to the dressing room and shed off the lace dress. I looked at the other dresses on the rack and picked one that caught my eye.
It was a strapless dress that was between Turquoise and blue. The bodice to the waist was covered in silver and blue gems. The back was cross crossed and very exposed so I couldn't wear a bra inside. However, the dress had its own built in bra. Past the waist was light chiffon fabric that was layered.
I quickly put the dress on and felt it hug my body. I was a little surprised by the short length of the dress. It looked longer on the hanger, but it was still modest enough - hitting mid-thigh. I bent over to make sure that the dress would provide full coverage and was pleased to see that it didn't ride up too much at all.
Felling confident I walked into the dressing area. Seb was talking to Ebony and I saw them both turn to look at me. I focused on Seb and saw his eyes flash quickly. His gaze ran from my head to my feet and back up again. My whole body tingled at that admiring look in Seb's eyes.
"That dress was made for you!" Ebony exclaimed walking towards me.
I turned to look in the mirror and let out a small gasp. The dress was beautiful. I immediately fell in love with it.
"Try on another one." Seb said picking up his magazine once again.
Shocked, I turned towards him. "What's wrong with this dress?" I demanded.
Seb shrugged without looking up. "It's not for you."
I frowned at him, I thought I looked great in the dress.
"I think you look fantastic in it! All the boys will be chasing after you." Ebony said. She handed me a pair of sliver heels. "Try those on, they will make your legs even longer."
I slipped on the sparkly heels, and immediately felt even more confident. I looked in the mirror and did few turned in front of it to see the dress from different angles.
Finally I turned to Seb.
"I really like this dress, can I please get it?" I asked knowing that he had the final say in whatever I got.
Seb shook his head, "Absolutely not." He said, staring intently at me.
"You don't think it looks good on me?" I asked feeling a bit disappointed. I was so sure he had liked.
"It looks fine, but I don't think your father would want you wearing that." His eyes remained planted on my face.
"Why?" I turned back to the mirror. "What's wrong with it?" I asked looking at the dress again. Maybe he saw a flaw that I didn't see.
I connected with his eyes through the mirror.
"It's too short Ana, the neck is too low and the back is too exposed." He told me in a matter of fact tone.
I stared at him in awe. "It's not too short - it's to my mid thigh, and the neck is a strapless sweetheart, it's supposed to be like this, and if the back seems took exposed I'll wear my hair down." I told him, even though I had originally thought of wearing it up just to show off the back. "Please Seb?" I begged.
It was ridiculous that I was pleading with Seb to buy me a dress. I usually didn't care much about fashion, and I have always been more on the conservative side in terms of dressing. However, I fell in love with this dress since the minute I saw it in the dressing room, and then when I saw Seb's initial reaction to it I fell even more in love with it.
Seb remained quite for a while, and I turned to look at Ebony who simply gave me a sympathetic smile.
"You promise to wear your hair down?" Seb asked, when he finally spoke.
I didn't trust myself to speak, so I nodded at him.
"And you aren't planning on cutting your hair before tomorrow right?" He asked, his face still serious.
"No definitely not." I replied, and waited patiently for him to answer.
"Fine then. You may get the dress." He said as he rose to his feet.
Overcome with joy, I rushed towards him and threw my arms around him. I briefly felt his hands close on my back before I pulled back. I was shocked at what I had just done but I didn't want it to show on my face.
"Thanks Seb! Consider allowing me to buy this dress your birthday present to me." I said and quickly walked back into the dressing room.
Once I locked the door behind me, I shook my self for being so stupid. Why did I have to go and hug Sebastian! I still felt the warmth of his hands behind me. The musky smell of his cologne lingered in my nose. I shook my head and stepped out of the dress. I would have to control my emotions a little better around him.
I got dressed in my long blouse, leggings and boots and then I carefully put the dress back up on the hanger and handed it to Ebony once I stepped out.
I walked out of the dressing area and spotted Seb talking to three different women. I sighed and slowly walked over towards him.
"I'm just waiting for someone." He was telling them as I approached them.
I gently tapped Seb on the shoulder.
He turned to me and stepped away from the women.
"Do you need anything else in here? I asked them to pack up the dress, and the shoes." He told me.
I looked around the store one more time and shook my head. "No, I don't need anything else from here. But I would like to stop at the store next door."
Seb nodded at me. "Why don't you go ahead and head over there? I'll pay and join you." He said and started towards the cash register.
As soon as I walked in the other store I was hit by loud music which was a signature for this store brand. I started in the jeans section and picked up a few pairs. Just as I was about to start looking at shirts Seb came into the store. He immediately strolled towards me.
"The dress and shoes will be delivered to the house by this evening." He said. Then to my surprise he started picking up shirts and handing them to me.
"Try those on." He told me with an expectant look. I looked down at the shirts he handed me and couldn't help but giggle. He had handed me two turtle neck shirts and five button up flannel shirts.
"Seb, I'm not going to try these on." I told him, putting the some of shirts back in their places.
"Why not?" He asked as he continued walking through the store.
"Because I am not a nun!" I said and let out an exasperated sigh. "I'll be eighteen tomorrow. I think I have learned how to dress myself."
"Those shirts are perfectly fine." He argued back.
I stared at him. "Would you ever date someone who wore this?" I asked picking up one of the turtle necks he had handed me earlier.
"Sure." He shrugged.
"No Seb. You wouldn't. Look why don't you go check your emails or something, and I'll meet you at the car in about a half hour?"
Seb just looked at me for a second as if he was about to say something. But then he just turned and walked out of the store.
I picked up some shirts, sweaters, jackets, shorts, shirts, dresses and shoes. I asked them to send everything over to the house knowing that they wouldn't fit in Seb's car.
As I approached Seb's car I noticed how all the women within viewing radius stopped and stared at him, some men stopped to look at him as well. He was perched up against the front of his car, casually scrolling through his phone. He emitted an aura of power, influence and wealth. I watched as a pretty brunette stopped by him, she placed her hand on his shoulder and tilted her head not her side as she said something. It was almost hilarious how much he got hit on. I slowed my pace, hoping that the brunette would leave before I got too close. I really wasn't looking forward to hearing her plead her way into Seb's bed, much like I heard the women in the boutique when they thought I was out of ear shot.
Fortunately Seb stepped away from the brunette and dismissed her with a charming smile before retuning his focus back to his phone.
"Does your girlfriend ever get jealous of all the women that fawn over you?" I asked as I closed the space between me and his car.
Seb clicked open the car door and I slid into the custom made leather seat.
"She knows I don't handle jealous women." He said reversing out of the parking space. "Besides we broke up."
"What?" I asked shocked. "When? Are you okay? Is she okay?"
Seb gave a bitter laugh. "You keep telling me that you are grown up, and yet you seem so naive to how relationships work." He turned to look at me before turning back to the road. "Our relationship wasn't based on feelings. It was based on what we could do for each other. I gave her publicity and many trinkets so of course she is fine."
I turned towards him and noticed the strong line of his jaw, and the sharp angles of his cheek bones. "How can a relationship not be based on feelings? Aren't you sad that it ended?"
Seb ran his hand through his hair, messing up his tousled hair even more.
"Some relationships are based on mutual gain. My relationship win Cybil worked well because as I've mentioned before I gave her publicity and bought her the things she wanted, and in return I had easy company when I went out, and a willing partner in bed." He said as if people had those kinds of relationships all the time.
"So to you the relationship was just about sex basically?" I asked a little shocked and disturbed by how he described his partnership. "Don't you ever get lonely?"
He turned to me once again. "No I don't get lonely. Because I have friends, and colleagues that I can have intelligent conversations with."
I frowned at him. "But what about having someone to share your hopes, fears, sadness, happiness and all those private emotions with? Don't you want to have someone that you can be a hundred percent yourself with? Someone who you can spend the rest of your life with?" I thought everyone what a relationship filled with love.
He sighed. "I think it's great that you want all those things, in fact you deserve all those things. You deserve to have someone love you, and be there for you at all times. However I am not built the same way. Love doesn't have much room in my life. Most businessmen would agree that relationships based on mutual benefit work a lot better than those based on love." He said as he stopped at a red light. I was actually impressed by how well he drove. Even though he had a car that could go from zero to sixty in six seconds, he maintained the speed limit. He left plenty of room between him and the car in front when he stopped and he was very courteous to people trying to change lanes or pedestrians trying to cross.
"I don't think so. My dad was very much in love with my mom. Actually I am sure that he still loves her. I would say he has been able to build a successful business even though he was in a relationship with feelings." I said recalling the happy memories between my parents.
I saw Seb nod. "You're right. But your dad is he exception." He turned the car into a building that I didn't recognize. "Now enough about my relationships." He said as he put the car in park.
Immediately a gentleman open my side of the car door and escorted me out before going to the drivers side. I realized that he was a valet guy and watched as he quickly drove the car away.
"Where are we?" I asked adjusting my cross-body purse.
"We're at my apartment." He replied, and placed a gentle hand on my back as if to propel me forward.
We walked up to an elevator and waited for it to arrive. I took that opportunity to look around. The building was definitely luxurious. There were fresh lilies in vases around the lobby. A beautiful fire place was in the center of the lobby and men dressed in suits walked around offering to help anyone that looked out of place.
Once we got in the elevator, Seb punched in a code and pressed the top most button that sent us zooming up to the highest floor on the building. When the elevator opened I couldn't help but gasp. Of course Seb would own the penthouse apartment. The elevator opened into a hallway that lead straight to his living room. The living room was cover in ceiling to floor windows which provided a stunning view of the beautiful city, and the massive river than ran through it. I walked up to one of the window panels and looked out, trying to spot my house.
"This is amazing!" I exclaimed as I walked from the living room to the kitchen.
Seb laughed at that. His laugh echoed throughout the apartment. "I'm glad you like. Would you like a tour?"
I nodded at him with a smile.
"Okay then. Well you've seen the living room and kitchen." He walked past the kitchen and turned a slight corner. "This is the dining area, though I rarely use it. I tend to eat in the living room when I'm here." He led me past the dining room into a hallway. At the end of the hallway he opened a door. "This is one of the guest bedrooms." I walked into the room and saw that the sheets matched the curtains and the furniture perfectly. There was a bathroom attached to the bedroom, which I'm sure his guests appreciated.
As if he knew what I was thinking Seb said, "I hired an interior designer."
I turned to face him. "You said this was one of the guest bedrooms? How many do you have?" I asked wondering why a single guy needed so many rooms, let alone such a big apartment.
He smirked at that, "I have three guest bedrooms and one master bedroom."
I rolled my eyes at that, and followed him as he showed me the other guest bedroom. Much like the last room everything in this room was perfectly matching as well.
Then we walked to the third guest room and my breath was stolen. This room unlike the other two was not only bigger but had the same windows as the living room. It was large and airy. The sheets were the color of a summer orange and the decor in the room worked to make it look even bigger.
"Wow! I bet all your guests fight to stay in this room." I said walking towards the window once again.
"No one has actually stayed in this room yet." Seb commented as he plopped down on the king sized bed.
"Why not? If I was your guest I would demand this room!" I told him.
Seb let out a chuckle. "Well that's good because this room is meant for you." He said as he leaned back on the bed and rested his head on the ample pillows.
"What?" I asked him confused.
"When I first came to see this apartment, I came with your father. We both liked the place right away and I knew I was going to buy it. When your father saw this room he said 'Anastasia would absolutely love this room.' We started talking about you and your father was worried that you might get tired of living at home and ask to get your own place too. So I told him I would always keep a room available for you so that if you ever wanted to get away from home you would have a safe place to stay at until you were ready to go back." He closed his eyes his eyes as he said the last few words.
I could help but get overwhelmed with emotion. Sebastian had actually saved this room for me, and hadn't let anyone stay in it? I didn't know what to say to him.
"That's so generous of you." I told him quietly.
Seb picked himself up onto his arms and looked at me. He could probably see the glint of tears in my eyes, and the blush on my cheeks. Slowly he rose to his feet and walked over to me. I turned away to hide my face but he placed his hand under my chin to keep my eyes focused on his.
"Hey, your father, Carrie, and you are the closest thing I have to a family." He whispered. "I might not always show it, but I care about all of you. And I'm forever indebted to your father for allowing me to be who I am told. Making room for you in my apartment is the least I could do. I will never be able to repay him for all that he has done "
He looked at me for another second before looking at the watch on his wrist.
"It's almost two and we haven't had lunch yet. There are some fantastic restaurants in this area that deliver. What are you in the mood for?" He asked as we started towards the door.
"Uh I'm up for anything." I said and blindly followed behind him. What Seb just shared with me was something that I'm positive he has never shared with anyone.
I was deep in thought about my what Seb had just said that I didn't notice that he had stopped walking until I bumped hard against his back.
"I'm sorry." I mumbled as I bent down to rub my knee with twisted slightly at the impact.
"Are you okay?" He asked looking down at me with his coal eyes.
"I'm fine." I told him and straightened. It was only then that I noticed that we were in his room. His bed room was massive, almost the size of his living room. He had everything in there. A treadmill, a desk, a television, a mini fridge, some free weights and much more. But it was all organized so well that I couldn't imagine any of those things being anywhere else in the apartment. My eyes finally landed on his massive bed, which I was sure was larger than a king size. It was draped in dark silk sheets and had a very masculine look to it.
"Well as you can see, this is my room." He stretched his hands out as if to show the whole room.
"Wow this is quite impressive." I said and suddenly felt the need to get out of the room. "I need to go to the bathroom." I told him and turned to leave his room.
"There is one right across the hall." He called after me as I walked out of his room.
I settled in on the couch and ate my Chinese food as we both watched a detective show. That was one thing we both loved even as children. We would always find detective shows to watch, or books to read and we would even pretend to be detectives.
My phone buzzed again for the fifth time and I reached to answer it. But before I could get to it, Seb grabbed it.
"What's so important that you feel the need to text through lunch?" He asked opening up the message.
I had been texting Chance about my party tomorrow so I just hoped he hadn't replied with something scandalous as he often did.
Seb started to read the text out loud. "So is tomorrow going to be the day we say goodbye to your...." Seb stopped reading and looked at me.
I felt myself turn red, because knowing Chance gave me a very good indication of how that text ended.
"It's not-" I started but Seb cut me off.
"You're a virgin?" He asked in a incredulous tone.
That was not at all what I had imagined he would say. I felt myself growing incredibly uncomfortable and knew I was turning the color of a tomato.
"That's none of your business." I told him, turning away to look at the TV.
Seb reached for the remote and swiftly turned the TV off. Before I knew it he was on his feet.
"None of my business? After the names I've called you? How can it be none of my business?" He demanded. I could see his eyes get darker and the lines in his face seemed more defined.
"Didn't anyone tell you that it's rude to read other people's messages?" I asked him. I was completely embarrassed. He probably thought I was a total prude, I mean what eighteen year old in this day and age remained a virgin?
"Why didn't you tell me?" Seb asked with his brows furrowed.
I laughed at that, "What exactly was I supposed to say. Hey Seb guess what I'm a virgin? Why would I ever need to tell you? And when exactly was I supposed to tell you?"
"You were supposed to tell me as soon as I walked into your dorm and started spouting ridiculous accusations. Oh god what must you think of me? All that talk about love and romance? No wonder you still believe in that! You are as green as can be!" His voice rose as he spoke almost as if he couldn't control it.
"I don't want to talk about this." I started to get up, but Seb was right there. Less than inches from me blocking any route of exit for me.
"Why? Does it make you uncomfortable?" He sneered at me.
"Yes!" I yelled and tried to push him away but he just grabbed my hands.
"You should have thought of that when you let me continue to think that you had slept with Chase." He said holding my hands to his chest so I couldn't move them again.
"His name is Chance!" I remained him for the second time.
"I don't give a damn what his name is. I want to know why you didn't tell? You knew I didn't believe you when you said you weren't about to have sex, so why didn't you tell me you were a virgin? It would have been such a easy thing to do to make me believe." He was scowling now. His eyes holding mine with the intensity of dark burning coal. "And that nightgown you were wearing? If it wasn't meant for a man, why did you have it?"
I sighed and struggled to free my hands again with no success. "Not that I need to explain myself to you, but I didn't tell you because you didn't ask. You just assumed whatever you wanted to. And I'll admit it looked bad, but I thought you would have known me well enough to know that I wouldn't lie about something like that! And I bought that nightgown for myself no one else. It was just something for me to sleep in. If you had I knocked on my door like a regular person, you would never have even seen it!" I exclaimed getting frustrated with this conversation.
Seb loosened his grip on my hands but still didn't let them go completely. "I'm sorry for making assumptions." He said.
I didn't trust myself to speak so I nodded. He gently let go of my hands, only to cup my face in his. "Please stop crying." He pleaded as his voice trembled.
I hadn't realized that I was crying, so I reached up to my face to feel the wet tears down my cheeks. I shook my head, trying to shake his hands away but he didn't move. He reached out his thumbs to wipe the tears off my cheeks. I had nothing to do except look at his face as he slowly tried to dry my tears with his fingers.
"Please." He pleaded again.
This time I opened my mouth to respond but I wasn't able to say anything as his mouth closed in on mine. I felt the warmth from his face before I felt his lips against mine. At first he just pressed his lips against mine. I thought he was about to pull back when he started to move his mouth against mine. His lips were softer than they had looked and I felt his hands slipping to the back of my head. He stepped even closer to me and I was suddenly pressed up against him. Before I knew it I was kissing him back. I circled my arms around his neck and ran my finger tips through his hair. His lips moved faster against mine and abruptly his warm tongue was against my lips, and in my mouth. I was kissing him back with just as much energy when suddenly I was firmed seated on the couch and Seb was a few feet back.
Shaken, I brought my fingers up to my lips and felt the swelling in them. I was looking down at my feet trying to comprehend what had just happened when he spoke.
"That should not have happened. I take all responsibility, and I promise it won't happen again." He said in a non sense tone. The wild passionate Seb, who's arms I was just in was gone. The Seb in front of me was very much a businessman.
When I didn't say anything he sighed. "Are you done eating?" He asked in the same formal tone as before.
I nodded my head and got up. I figured it was time to leave. I grabbed the paper plates we were eating in and went to grab the to boxes.
"Leave it. My maid will clean it up this evening. Are you ready to head back home?"
"Yeah." I replied, proud of my self for keeping my voice so even. "I just need to stop by the bathroom first."
"Of course." Seb said with a nod as I turned towards the bathroom.
Once inside I looked at the mirror and took in my messy hair and swollen lips. I felt myself on the verge of tears but I wouldn't let myself cry. Luckily I had decided to wear waterproof mascara so my eye makeup was undamaged. I quickly fixed my hair, and then look out some chap stick from my purse to apply over my lips.
We started the drive back in dead silence. I could almost hear myself breath. I still wasn't sure what exactly happened in Seb's apartment but I knew we couldn't just ignore each other.
"Seb?" I started.
"Yeah?" He replied his eyes glued to the road.
"Like you said it was a mistake. It happen, and unfortunately there is no going back. I say we just forget about it and go on living our lives. We can't ignore each other for however long my dad is gone. And I don't want it to be awkward every time we see, or have to talk to each other. Can we just say that we were both high on emotions and it probably would have been the same if it was anyone else?" I asked, even knowing that if it was anyone other than Seb I would I've pushed them back in the blink on an eye. Come to think of it if it was anyone other than Seb I wouldn't have been in that position in the first place.
Seb was quite for a long time. I was almost starting to think that I had imagined saying all that out loud.
"You have grown up." He said to me. "It's takes a great deal of maturity to think like that. I am so sorry for what happened in the apartment and also about the way I have treated you. As you've said, I think it's best to forget that it ever happened."
Soon we pulled into the driveway and I started across the stairs in the front of the house. I was two steps up when I felt someone tug my hand. I half expected to Seb there, instead I turned to find-
"Chance!" I exclaimed.
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