It was a normal day in the thousand sunny, Zoro was asleep as usual and Sanji was trying his best to cook. The reason Sanji was struggling was because he didn't have enough food for everyone, so someone had to miss out dinner. And he decided straight away that certain someone was going to be him. He looked away from the stove and covered his nose as he sneezed. He had recently caught a cold but didn't tell anyone, he didn't want to seem weak. Everyone else was fine, but Sanji was hiding a little secret ever since he joined. He didn't want to tell anyone about it. During the two years of training, he had become more secretive of that secret that grew bigger and worse. He placed all of the nine plates down, he paused when he was about to place the ninth. He put it away knowing he wasn't going to eat. He placed the food on each plate and set out eight glasses before placing a bottle of wine next to a plate for a certain person, he filled the others with water. He sighed before finishing off what was to be done. He walked out feeling emptier that usual. Yes. He was depressed, he never took off his coat/suit to reveal his wrists, they were filled with blood stains and cuts, he hated himself, he found himself useless and weak. He hadn't ate for three weeks starving himself when there was enough food, he faked smiles and laughter. He had his mask. It was useful for him, he was saving up tears for a better one. He always wore long sleeves even on the hottest days, no one seemed to notice, no one asked or became suspicious. No one ever noticed that he barely ate, no one saw through his mask. No one cared. The only thing in his mind was how useless, ugly, horrid, awful, powerless and weak he was. He hates to think about it, he had flashbacks from when he was younger of how his siblings would make fun of him and push him around. He just wanted to die knowing no one would care anyway.
"Dinner is ready!" He called out faking a smile.
"Yeah! Foods ready! Yay! My favorite time of the day!" Luffy called out.
"ROBIN-CHAN! NAMI-SAN! Come to dinner~!" He called out faking actions as usuall. Everyone went in. There was an empty seat. One where Sanji was meant to sit, but there was another one opposite him. Zoro's plate stood there. He sighed walking out. He searched for the swordsman, he found him sleeping on the grass as usual.
"Oi. Mosshead, wake up, go eat," he kicked his side. Zoro shot his eyes open and stood up before walking towards the kitchen. He stopped half way through.
"I'm not hungry." He mumbled quietly.
"Well you need to eat. You haven't ate today,"
"Tch, whatever curly brow," he walked off scoffing to himself.
Sanji walked away into his room, he didn't sleep in the boys dorm anymore. He asked Franky to make him a room. He told him not to ask why, so he didn't ask. He shut his door before sliding down onto the cold floor, he sneezed again, before he uncontrollably began coughing. He began coughing blood. As soon as he stopped he was panting and sweating. He rubbed his eyes from the tears that were sliding down. He heard the crew come out of the kitchen.
"Need to wash now..." he told himself before taking a napkin from his pocket and whipping the blood away from the floor and from his mouth. He threw the bloody napkin away and exited, keeping his head down low, he walked to the kitchen, it was empty as usual. He didn't notice the swordsman eyes following him until the blond entered the kitchen. Zoro stood up from the green grass and followed Sanji. He looked through the window. He followed Sanji's movements as he washed the dishes, his eyes widen when Sanji was placing a dish, his sleeve rose a little revealing cuts and bruises on his wrists, Sanji quickly covered his wrist pulling his sleeve lower and lower. Zoro frowned. He decided to enter.
"Hey cook,"
"What is it? Mosshead? Got lost on the ship?" He smirked.
"No, can I see your wrist?"
"Why the fuck should I? What's gotten into you?" He pulled his wrist away hiding it behind his back.
"I-"
"Oh look! There's a bird!" Sanji pointed in a random direction making Zoro turn to see nothing. As soon as he looked back to where Sanji was, he was gone, he searched the whole ship for the blond cook. The rest of the crew playing games in a new room Franky built for games. Zoro searched every room there was, even the girls dorm. But no trace of the blond. He grunted in annoyance wandering around looking for him. He stopped in front of a door. A certain room he has never encountered nor entered. He gulped turning the knob.
"Shit...." he mumbled knowing it was locked and wouldn't budge. He looked at the windows, only to see the curtains were blocking his view inside.
"FUCK THIS ROOM!" He spat. Meanwhile, Sanji had locked the door and was hiding under the bed sobbing and crying silently, he didn't want Zoro to find out what he was doing behind everyone's back. He rolled up his sleeve as the razor was hovering above his wrists, he was laying down so it was a little bit difficult. He squeezed his eyes shut and cut... 1....2....3....4 cuts. He dropped the razor as his wrists were stained with blood as it travelled down on the floor. More tears ran down his tear-stained face as he rolled up into a ball and sobbed in his knees.
However, Zoro was banging on the door and shouting.
"Sanji! Open up!" He wiped away the sweat trickling down his face. He walked away. Sanji thought he had left so he crawled out from under the bed and sat down in the center of his room. He rose the razor above his chest.
"It's time, goodbye everyone..." before he could do anything. The door was sliced in two making his jump in surprise. There stood Zoro. Before Sanji could say anything else, he was tackled to the floor, Zoro held Sanji's wrists above his head as he cried in pain while the razor wasn't in his hands anymore. He gritted his teeth squirming. Zoro gasped at how cold his body was. He noticed the bags under his blue eyes that looked duller than ever.
"Why does it hurt you so much if I hold your wrists?" He breathed frowning down at Sanji. His one fictional eye trailed up to his wrists. He brought one of the wrists up, he pulled the sleeve down revealing the button up shirts sleeve. He scoffed pulling it down. His eyes widen as his view was covered with red stripes, blood staining his wrists, he noticed four new and fresh cuts. He pulled the sleeve higher up to his elbow.
"S-Sanji.... what have you been doing all this time?!" He called his name softly before he spat.
"I....-"
"No! Why...?" He softly spoke looking down.
"No one would care anyway! So why not do something else! Go fuck around or something! I-It's none of your business!" He explained tears flowing down his cheeks. Zoro crawled off him and sat as Sanji sat up too. There was a moment of silent.
"I care..." he breathed as Sanji gasped and let more tears trail down his stained face of tears. "I always did and I always will... I always see how dull your eyes look when you're walking by. I always wondered what you did in this room of yours, always wondered why no one thanks you for the food you make... be honest to me.... you haven't ate for three weeks haven't you?" He looked up at Sanji deep in the eyes. Sanji broke down in tears as he tried explaining.
"I have!"
"Oh really? I haven't seen you sit at the table with us for the last few weeks,"
"I-I eat when I cook!"
"You don't! I always hear your stomach grumble or something," he exclaimed. Sanji just looked away as something caught Zoro's eyes.
The razor
He quickly crawled towards it and grabbed it.
"I see you with this one more time, I'm going to force you to stay with me," Sanji just nodded looking down. Zoro grabbed Sanji's chin making him look at him in the eye.
Sanji's eyes widen as Zoro leaned in and captured his chapped lips. He blushed trying to pull away. Sanji managed to pull away enough to get out of Zoro's kiss.
"What?" Zoro questioned.
"You'll catch a cold,"
"I don't care," he replied making Sanji flush red. Zoro leaned again to capture his lips, Sanji closed his eyes and wrapped his hands around his neck kissing back, they kissed for a while before they both pulled away from lack of air.
"Even the inside of your mouth is cold.." he mumbled making Sanji look away blushing. He picked up the blond cook and led him into the kitchen,
"I didn't eat since I saved it for you, so eat," he sat Sanji in his chair with the food in front of him.
"But-"
"Please?" Sanji began eating as Zoro sat down on the chair next to him and smiled softly watching him eat. After he finished, Zoro didn't call Chopper to do Sanji's wounds and instead, did it for him. After that, Zoro picked up Sanji and guided him to the cook's room, laid him in after starting the fire at the fire place since he did have a cold, he climbed in bed next to him before sliding into the covers and bringing Sanji into his chest until his back connected with his chest, he noticed his ears were red and smirked.
"Someone's blushing~" he breathed as Sanji cuddled up closer to him.
"S-Shut up..." he mumbled blushing harder.
"I love you," he breathed in his ear making Sanji flush.
"I.. I love you too..." he responded stuttering from the blush that spread across his red face.
Sanji smiled softly....
And that smile he made.....
That was a real smile