Edited (5/29/20)
Miles froze when he caught sight of us. His eyes danced between my face and the guy that had me pinned to the wall. I could practically see the gears in his head working overtime to piece together exactly what he was seeing.
The guy stepped even closer to me, so his stomach brushed against my own. In response, I yelled louder this time, "Stop!"
It was then that the light went off in Miles' head and he finally understood what was happening. He wasted no time in squaring his shoulders and storming down the hall with his hands clenched at his sides. The guy was still oblivious to the presence of another person, so he took the liberty of brushing one finger along my jawline. I shuttered back against the touch, hoping the wall would just swallow me up.
"I said stop," I said again struggling harder in his grip.
"What you don't like it?," he said in my ear. A vivid flashback washed over me like a bucket of cold water and I was sure I was going to be sick if Miles didn't pull him off me this instant.
He seemed to hear my prayers because in that moment, Miles appeared out of thin air. "Hands off!" he demanded, grabbing the guy's shoulder and wrenching him back with the most force he could muster. The guy stumbled back and caught himself just before hitting the wall behind him. Miles stepped in front of me to block the assailant's view of me and act as a barrier.
"What the hell?" the guy said clearly annoyed. He pushed his hair back from his forehead, so I could better see his cold eyes that revealed no remorse.
"That's my teammate," Miles bit out. "Hands off."
"And? I hear teammate, not girlfriend" he said, blowing Miles off. Over Miles' shoulder I could see him straighten his shoulder and resume his full height, which was about two inches shorter than Miles.
"Do not touch her."
"She wanted it. She was all over me."
"Standing in the elevator by myself is not an open invitation," I argued glaring at my attacker. "I could easily sue you for sexual harassment. My mother just happens to be a prosecutor."
The guy seemed to rethink his options more now.
"Get off our floor and stay away from her," Miles said as he led the guy gruffly by the shoulder to the elevator. He shoved him inside and pressed the button for the ground floor.
This guy had no fear though and still had the audacity to wave at me with a smirk on his face. Only when the elevator doors closed did I took a full breath. I fell back against the wall to lean on it for support as my legs felt like they were going to crumple underneath me. My eyes welled up and I looked at the ceiling to will the tears from falling.
It was over. I was fine, but a familiar feeling of panic was growing in my stomach.
"Are you okay?" Miles said softly. He took a small step towards me, careful not to get too close. The usual arrogance that I was getting accustom to was gone and a gentleness replaced it.
I simply nodded in answer, worried that my voice would crack if I attempted to say anything. We stood there in silence as I tried to collect myself and pick up my broken pieces. I needed to be alone for awhile and get back in control, probably take some meds to ebb the anxiety that was pumping in my body. The adrenaline of the last five minutes was beginning to wear off and I was moments away from melting down.
"Do you need anything?" Miles tried again.
After a deep breath, I composed myself enough to respond to him without my voice trembling. "I'm going to go lay down for a little while by myself."
"Okay," Miles agreed immediately.
"Harrison is downstairs. Can you tell him that I have a headache and am taking a nap?"
Miles nodded but didn't move until I had straightened myself from the wall and taken a few shaky steps towards our door. There was a look of conflict on his face as he watched me walk down the hall by myself. Once I had made it to our door and unlocked it, he took that as his cue to leave. I stepped into the room and pushed the door closed, not feeling completely safe even when I locked it.
I stumbled to the unclaimed bed and laid in a fetal position on top of the covers. My mind was scrambled and my breaths came in short, uneven gasps. The feeling of his hands on my arms and along my jaw was intensified even though he was no longer there. I wanted to call my mom to find some sort of comfort in the middle of this mess, but I knew that she would turn around and drive back to campus to drag me back to Maryland. Being a single parent has made my mom far more protective over me since it was just her and me. However, we've both realized that she can't protect me from everything.
During my freshmen year of high school, I met Chris through mutual friends. He was a well-liked senior athlete, who happened to pursue me and eventually we started dating. Me being an awkward freshman who had several rough years in middle school thought it was so cool to have a senior take interest in me. I was so wrapped up in the popularity that came along with dating Chris that I overlooked the numerous red flags over the several months we went out. It was hard to say no to his well-crafted charm and the fact that he was the first boy that made me feel wanted and pretty. The age gap created a major divide in what we wanted out of the relationship, specifically the physical side. Being 15 years old, I was not ready to take our relationship any farther, while Chris was well-experienced in that department and constantly asked about it. Towards the end of our relationship, I could tell he was frustrated with me and his asking became more like pressuring.
It was an end of the year party that all upperclassmen went to that it happened. Chris brought me along and through massive coercion from him and his friends, I drank alcohol for the first time. I had no idea my tolerance at that point, so I followed along with what they said. I was too drunk and confused to fight him off when Chris brought me upstairs and forced himself on me.
For the next year and a half, I went to therapy in attempt to mend what he broke. Other than my mom, Ellie, Chris, and the therapist, no one knew what happened that night. Rumors circulated around school speculating why Chris and I broke up so suddenly, but nothing was ever confirmed or denied. I struggled with mental, especially anxiety, through the summer heading into sophomore year and most of my second year of high school. It's taken a great deal of work for me to be where I'm at and I refused to let today's incident reverse the hard work I've put in both mentally and take away the opportunity of this camp I earned.
After lying motionless for almost fifteen minutes in attempt to slow my ragged breathing, I pushed myself and found my anxiety medication to help soothe my frayed nerves. The nauseous feeling was slowly going away the longer I stayed lying down, so I decided a nap would be a good choice.
Three hours later, a knock on the door woke me up and I realized upon checking my phone that I had slept until almost 4:30. Pushing my rumpled hair out of my face, I answered the door to find Harrison on the other side.
"Hi," he greeted me with soft eyes. "I just wanted to come check on you to see how you were doing."
My heart melted. "Much better actually. Sorry to leave you downstairs like that. I still have my playing cards if you're interested," I offered.
A smile lit up his face and he nodded in agreeance. We found an empty table in the lobby to play at. Harrison dealt out the cards for us to play Go Fish since it was a game we both already knew. I found the remote for the flat screen on the wall and switched on the TV to find something for us to watch. ESPN just happened to be broadcasting the Nationals' game, so I happily settled on that.
"Let's play," Harrison said after finishing dealing out the cards.
I grabbed my hand and organized it.
"Go ahead," he said looking down at his cards.
"Do you have any 4's?" I asked him to start off the game.
"Go fish," he answers.
I grab a card and wait for him to see what he wants.
"Got any 9's?"
"Damn it."
Harrison gleefully took my 9.
The game went on with Harrison kicking my ass the entire game. He had a really good memory of everything I said, so I only got two pairs.
"Wow, you're pretty good," I said laying down my two pairs.
"You being not so good helps me out," he said giggling.
"Hey!" I said putting my hands on my hips.
"Let's play again."
"Fine, but you're going down this time, Smartass."
We played again with Harrison whipping my butt again. This time however, I got three pairs.
"Ha, this time I got three," I said flapping my cards in his face.
"You still lost, Gloria," Harrison said counting his pairs.
I shrugged, content I did better than the last hand. I turned my focus to the game on the TV and watched as we scored the go ahead run to put us up by one heading into the bottom of the ninth inning. We watched the rest of the game together, which turned out to be a win for the Nationals. When the game was over, it was just about time for dinner, so together we began our short walk over to the dining hall.
"Have you met your roommate yet?" I asked as we strolled over.
"No, not yet. He hasn't been in the room any of the times I've gone up there. I'm a little nervous to meet him tonight. What if he doesn't like me?" Harrison kicked a loose rock ahead of us and shoved his hands deep in his pockets.
"I'm sure it will be just fine. I have your back if anything happens," I say reassuring him. From the short time we've spent together, I've become quite fond of Harrison. He was almost like a younger brother for me and I would do just about anything for him, including scaring off rude roommates.
We found our way to the serving counter where they were serving grilled chicken and mashed potatoes for dinner. I grabbed a tray and a side plate of pre-prepared house salad. Several women were working busily behind the counter, mixing food in different pots and pouring them into serving dishes.
"What can I get for you?" a woman said behind the counter as Harrison and I approached the main entrée section of the counter. Her eyes were cast down at a piece of paper that she was writing on.
"I'll do the chicken and potatoes," I answered.
Her head immediately snapped up at the sound of my voice and she gave me a quizzical look as her eyes scanned my face. "You're not a boy," she stated in surprise.
"No, I'm not," I said with a small laugh.
"And you're here for the camp?"
I nodded in response which brought a wide smile to her face. "Now, that's refreshing to hear. Good for you girl," she said giddily. "I'm Carol, and you are?"
"Gloria."
"It's nice to meet you, Gloria. Me and the ladies behind the counter are here if you need anything."
"Thank you," I replied, mirroring her grin. She handed plates of food to both Harrison and me and sent us on our way. As soon as we came out of the dinner line, guys had started pouring in since Harrison and I were a few minutes early.
We avoided the rush of people and found our table in the back corner again. The volume in the room was becoming increasingly loud again as more guys came through the doors and filled up the vacant tables. Harrison immediately dove into his mashed potatoes, while I picked at mine. My stomach was feeling much better, but I didn't want to push my luck.
I took small, slow bites and looked over the many tables in the cafeteria.
"Do you have any siblings?" Harrison asked out of the blue as I subconsciously was scanning for the dark haired boy from earlier.
"No, I'm an only child, unless you count my dog, Lenny. What about you?"
"A little brother and sister. My brother, Max, is twelve, and my sister, Selena, is nine."
"I bet you're a great older brother," I commented.
This made Harrison's cheeks tinge pink and his shoulders shrugged. "I'm alright."
I wanted to know more about my new friend, so I asked him another question to keep us going. "How'd you get in to baseball?"
"My dad grew up as a Pirates fan, so most days when they were on TV, I would watch with him. I then wanted to play baseball myself and it took off from there. What about you?"
"My dad played baseball in high school, college, and a few years in the major league. He ended up tearing his labrum after about four years in, which was about the same time he met my mom, so he retired. When I came along, he signed me up for little league the moment I was old enough."
"That's so cool! What teams did he play for?"
"He was drafted by the Colorado Rockies but was traded to the Rangers after two years in the minors. He ended up floating between Triple A and the Show for his last two years."
"What position?"
"He was a shortstop and I of course had to follow in his exact footsteps. What about you?"
"Mostly outfield, but I usually take some time at second base too."
We continued chatting about our starts in baseball and I enjoyed listening to Harrison get excited about what he was telling me. We were in our own little world at the back table. We finished dinner before most of the other guys, so we walked back to the dorm by ourselves. It was only when we were waiting for the elevator that we realized that we were not alone.
"Hey," Miles greeted us.
"Hi," Harrison immediately responded, once again with stars in his eyes at his idol.
I nodded my head in his direction to acknowledge him, but kept it at that. We all got in the elevator with Miles choosing to lean against the back corner. Standing at the front of the small space, I could feel his eyes burning a hole into my back. I suddenly felt self-conscious with the knowledge that he was watching me. The events from earlier also began in the elevator, so a sick feeling was rising in my chest the longer I stood in the confined space. When the doors did open, I practically ran out, feeling like the walls were closing in on me.
I said a short goodbye to Harrison and started towards my door. Miles was a few steps behind me when I tried putting the key into the lock. It was like the anxiety from earlier today came back and hit me over the head as I tried to unlock the door with no success. I couldn't even get the key lined up to put in the slot. Miles stood behind me, once again watching me as I struggled with the key, which only amplified the shakiness of my hands.
"Geez, Gloria, let me do it," Miles said sounding frustrated. He enclosed my hand with his larger one to steady my trembling fingers. Miles's hand was warm and calloused as he led my hand to the doorknob. My already pounding heart seemed to be accelerating with every second and the fact that I could feel his breath lightly on my ear, made it hard to think straight. The key slid in to the lock easily and turned the door open.
"See, not that difficult," Miles said, a teasing tone to his voice.
I spun around to face him and so badly wanted to set him straight that the anxiety coursing through my veins could make things that "difficult," but that was a conversation I wasn't willing to have with him. Instead, I stared at him with a narrowed gaze.
"I don't need your help," I spit out after a while. There was something about Miles that rubbed me the wrong way and the look in his eyes that suggested he was trying to figure me out only further motivated me to keep him at an arm's distance away. I didn't need some asshole like him trying to dig into my personal life.
"You did earlier," he countered, tilting his head to one side in challenge.
"I could have handled it," I said stupidly. I knew that with the size difference between me and the guy this afternoon that that was untrue but my pride was getting the best of me.
Miles' eyebrows immediately shot up. "Really? That's what you're going with? You haven't even said thank you and you're going to say that you could have handled it without my help." He took a step up with his chest puffed out in some sort of dominance.
He had a point but I was too stuck on sticking to what I said and defending my ego that I took a step forward as well. I wasn't backing down. "Thanks," I deadpanned with anything but appreciation in my tone. "But like I said, I can protect myself."
At this point, our chests were practically touching as we glared at each other. Neither of us with any intention of submitting to the other's hard stare. Being this close to Miles, I took my time in examining his features at this point distance. I had to admit that Miles' eyes were mesmerizing up close. The emerald green was almost blinding. His chiseled jaw was clenched as he looked down at me and seemed like it could cut paper. His blonde hair was mused over his forehead and was almost falling in to his eyes. His lips were a soft pink that made me want to reach out and touch them to see if they were as soft as they looked. It was hard not to say that he was one of the most attractive guys I had ever laid eyes on, which made focusing a tad difficult.
Earth to Gloria! You are talking about your idiot, conceited roommate here. Get it together.
I didn't want to back down from this stupid challenge, thus I stayed planted in my spot, inches away from him with my jaw set sharply.
The elevator suddenly binged to announce its arrival and three guys stepped off laughing. They stopped dead in their tracks when they saw the showdown that was going on in front of our door. From their view, it probably looked a little different than what was actually happening.
"Fuck," Miles whispered harshly under his breath and I couldn't have agreed more.
"S-sorry, wrong floor," one of them said. They backed in to the elevator snickering.
"Way to go, man," a voice shouted from the elevator before the doors closed. We could hear them burst out laughing.
"Fuck is right. The last thing I need is for people to think that there's something going on between us," I said angrily. I spun on my heel and walked into our room where my still packed suitcase was waiting.
"I doubt it's the worse thing," Miles commented, grabbing items from the dresser.
"Would you shut up already? You just have a response to everything, don't you?" I snapped back at him.
He shrugged before leaving the room with a towel. I closed the door behind him and enjoyed the peace and quiet of being alone. Today was exhausting and the intensive hadn't even technically started yet. Deciding it was probably a good time to start, I opened my suitcase and took out my clothes to organize them on my bed. I pulled open the dresser drawers to find Miles had taken the bottom three and left the top three empty. At least he was somewhat thoughtful. I folded my clothes into the drawers and set out the towels I had brought with me.
After organizing my clothes, I moved on to the pictures and other necessities I brought. On the night stand next to my bed, I placed a framed picture of my dad, mom, and me. In the drawer, I pushed my laptop and several books I had brought along with me. I had always been a huge reader growing up and during the summer, it was something that kept me busy.
I yawned after everything was done. I checked my phone to find it was already 9:30. Taking pajamas short and a tank top out, I changed for bed. I grabbed a sweatshirt to throw on over since it was cold in the room with the air conditioner on full blast. I grabbed my cosmetics bag and went to find the bathroom.
Because Marist divided their floors by men and women, both bathrooms were designated for men. I decided on the bathroom that was at the far end of the hall to hopefully avoid Miles. I opened the door to find a long counter of about 6 sinks that were all unoccupied. From the silence in the room, it seemed like I was the only one in there. I took my time brushing my teeth and flossing. I then washed my face and took off my makeup. My contacts came out next. My eyesight was laughably terrible and I couldn't see a thing without contacts or glasses. Finally, I brushed out my hair of knots. Tying it in a messy bun and pushing on my glasses, I left the bathroom.
Miles was still not back when I returned to the room, which I was not complaining about. Lights out was not until 10:30, so I had about 30 minutes to read. I snuggled in to bed with my pillow pet that I brought. It was a ridiculous blue and pink unicorn that Ellie had gotten me for my birthday as a joke two years ago. I loved the thing though and couldn't leave it at home. With my book settled on my lap, I relaxed into my pillows and read.
The doorknob turned about 25 minutes later. The door popped open and Miles shuffled in with a now wet towel in hand. His hair was damp and hung even more over his forehead.
"You have the bottom three drawers," I reminded him before he went digging through my drawers.
He crouched down and opened the bottom one. I started reading my book again, waiting for him to get into his bed so we could turn off the light. Miles had another idea though. He pulled his shirt over his head and now his back was on full view once again. I couldn't help but stare. His skin was tanned and not a flaw could be seen. As soon as I heard him unbuckling his belt, I bolted upright. What the hell is he doing?
I found a small decorative pillow and chucked it at him. It hit him square in the head with a soft thud.
"Hey," he said turning around.
"Did you not change after your shower?"
"I forgot my pajamas."
"Well, I'm in here."
His chest and abs were now turned towards me. A six pack was staring back at me. I swallowed, looking away.
"And?" he said.
"And I'm in the room, so why don't you go somewhere else to change."
"I'm not taking off my boxers, Princess. Don't get too excited there."
"Don't call me that and try not to flatter yourself."
He watched me with teasing eyes. "Too late." He pulled his shorts down revealing a pair of plaid boxers. He pulled on a pair of sweats, but didn't bother with a shirt.
"So, can I go to bed or are you going to stare at me some more?" he asked with his hands on his hips. It was then I realized that I was in fact staring.
"I'm not staring," I denied immediately, turning my attention back to my book. "Go to bed."
I got up from my bed as he got in to his. Pulling off my sweatshirt, I placed it back in the correct drawer. I turned around to now find Miles staring.
"Can I go to bed or are you going to keep staring?" I snapped his own words back at him.
"I think I'm going to keep staring."
My jaw dropped. I snatched the decorative pillow off the floor and with all my anger behind it, I threw it at him. He ducked at the last second. The pillow crashed against the wall and fell on his back.
"Jesus woman," Miles muttered. I gave him a dirty look before switching off the overhead light. I carefully moved back to my bed and took off my glasses to place on the nightstand before snuggling into the covers with my pillow pet. There was several moments of silence but Miles of course couldn't keep his mouth shut for that long.
"Good night, Princess," he said yawning.
"Night, Jackass."
"It's Miles, not Jackass."
"It's Gloria, not Princess."
He laughed quietly. His laugh was deep and sent chills across my skin. I could practically feel it rumbling through his chest.
"Good night," he finally said sighing.
I smiled in to the dark, feeling like I had won this argument in a way. "Good night."
My eyes were heavy with sleep now. I laid in the darkness for awhile before hearing Miles' breathing slow and become steady. My eyelids closed and I fell in to sleep.