I am not an attractive girl. Growing up, most boys never thought I was beautiful...or even pretty. Girls never watched me with awe or envy or wished down to their marrow they could swap bodies and walk in my shoes.
I am learning to accept my flaws, to embrace them. I am leaning to look in the mirror and enhance the good, because we all have something good about us. In my case, it's my eyes. They're large—which to some might sound unattractive, but I'm here to tell you differently.
Large eyes are expressive. Captivating and made for drama. They sit center-stage and command complete attention if you dress them properly. If you learn the secrets to make them shine.
Secrets I might not have learned were it not for Eshe.
Eshe Diallo is one of those rare few born to be beautiful. She has a look that's all her own, entirely unique, but her face pulls you in and holds you spellbound. She's so achingly beautiful it almost hurts to look at her, and when standing next to her sun, you're often cast in a shade so dark others can't see you.
But you want to know the horrible truth? No one could ever really see her either.
So blinded by what they saw on the outside, most never thought to dig deeper, and worse—didn't believe they had to. And that kind of blind fascination can be soul-crushing. I mean, no wonder the Kim Kardashian's of the world don't aspire to become more, to do more when we expect so little from them.
What's the point when the core messages inundating young girls are how to get a man and keep him interested, or how to have a firmer butt and change the way you look, but no one really wants to discuss how to love yourself and how to be happy with you.
There's a vital difference.
Especially for those of us who don't fit in with the status quo...
Of the Sisters, you might say Eshe and I were the most similar. Socially awkward, introverts who could barely hold our heads up to face the world and adored all things comic books and Cosplay. Such a pair of fangirl geeks. (Don't even get me started on Firefly!)
Self-love is something we both struggled with, though Eshe might tell you different; I'd never met anyone so painfully shy. So afraid of attention. She was and always has been breathtaking for reasons that go so far beyond just her 'face'.
But where I continue to struggle with my self-confidence and identity, Eshe learned to look within, to find that spark only she could see, and let it shine outwards. Overtime I watched that desolate flicker grow and transform as she faced her fears and overcame her insecurities.
She was a wallflower who had plucked off all her petals and cast them to a fearless wind. Glorious.
Most of us can only aspire to be so brave.