carl's pov
My dad, Lincoln, myself, and my buddy Ron had gotten back from our 2 day run. We'd gathered a great amount of supplies, so much that Ron and I had to drive separately from my dad and Lincoln.
I was very excited to see Layla and most importantly.. my little sister Judith. Although I technically couldn't even call her little anymore. She's 8 years old now and she's practically the best shot in the group. She's probably the most self independent 8 year old I'd ever met. I couldn't wait to have my sister and Layla back in my arms.
Ron on the other hand couldn't wait to get his hands all over Enid, his girlfriend. He hadn't shut up about getting her in his be-
"Bro, we're home" Ron snapped me out of my thoughts and got out of the truck. He whistled and banged on the gates of our home. "Eugene, open up it's us!" Ron called and I got into the driver seat. I put the truck in drive and pulled through the gates of our community, Alexandria.
Our community for about two years now, it's been the closest thing we'd had to a home since the farm two years ago.
We'd slept in a barn, we slept in a hospital, we even slept in a church for a while. None of those places even felt remotely like home, like Alexandria did. Alexandria was however missing something. I, Carl Grimes was missing something.
"Shithead!" Layla called out and came to hug me. She practically pulled me out of the truck. "Nice to see you too!" I said squeezing her. "I missed you, stop leaving your best friend!" Layla hit my arm. "And your little sister, who happens to be a better shot than you!" Judith ran up from behind Layla and jumped into my arms. "Told you I'd come back." I kissed Judith's forehead and we gave each other fist bumps.
"Your dad doesn't get a hug?" My dad called out to Judith and put his hands on his hips. "Dad!" she said and ran over to him. Layla held onto me and we both smiled watching them embrace. I looked down because I missed being a dad. I really longed for that feeling again. "Come on, you." Layla wrapped her arm around my waist and we went to the back of the truck to unload the supplies we had found.
"Carl, Enid and I have to go take care of something really quick? You mind unloading and once we finished what we have to do, I'll give you a hand with what is left?" Ron held onto Enid and she was practically dragging him away, while she nibbled on his ear.
"Go and get a room, there are children around!" Layla laughed and pushed them away
"Did you get it? Mason has been begging me for it all day" A girl named Adora from Alexandria asked me. She was most likely in her 20's and she had a nephew named Mason that was 5. That's how old my son Sam is or was. Sam would be here right now if I wasn't a murderer.
"Carl?" Layla snapped me from my thoughts and I grabbed the stuffed Elephant that Adora's nephew constantly requested. "Sorry, here you go." I handed Adora the elephant and she gave me a confused looked. "You ok Carl?" she asked and Layla looked at me wanting to know also, but she knew about Sam. Layla was like a sister to me, she knew every little detail about my past. However, she knew nothing about what I had done two years ago to drive Daryl into this stage of depression.
"I'm fine, no worries. The elephant wasn't all that hard to find. Compliments of the local gift shop exactly a mile from here." I smiled to Adora and she thanked me. Adora then walked away to give the elephant to Mason.
"Hey" Layla squeezed my arm a tad and I looked at her. "I'm fine, Layla." I smiled and she raised her eyebrows. Layla knew I didn't want to talk about it, so she left it at that.
As Layla and I continued to unload supplies, Daryl hopped onto his bike and headed off. He leaves for a certain amount of hours, and nobody knows where he goes or what he does. He always comes back, so nobody ever really questions him about it. He's really kept to himself the past two years. Physically he was in the group, and apart of Alexandria's community. Mentally, Daryl was not here. Daryl's hardly said more than a handful of words to anybody besides my dad and another guy named Aaron whom we also met here in the community of Alexandria. In the past two years he has not been the same. Ever since..Carol
My dad and I both watched Daryl leave and he looked over to me. I stared at my dad for a few seconds. He looked down and then away. I wished so bad that I could tell at least my dad the truth, about what I had done two years ago. What I had done that drove my only son away, what I had done that drove the only girl I ever loved away.
"I wish Daryl would just open up to somebody. It's not healthy keeping his emotions inside like that." Layla said and unloaded more supplies. "He talks to my dad and he's gotten close with Aaron." I tried to ease the situation. "I don't know where Daryl goes and neither do you. Your dad nor Aaron even know where Daryl goes and-
"He has already been through so much Lay, if he doesn't want to open up about it he doesn't have to. Just give it a rest already!" I snapped at Layla and immediately regretted it. Layla looked down for a few seconds before I grabbed her and pulled her into a hug.
Layla's entire family, Mom, Dad, 3 year old brother, and 14 year old sister had been eaten completely alive by walkers a couple of years after the world had fallen down. She watched it all happen, and there was nothing she could do. She was being held hostage and her kidnappers made her watch from start to finish, her family being slaughtered.
A man named Abraham, his wife Rosita, and their friend Eugene had found Layla beaten, raped and left for dead on the side of the road two days after it had happened. The quartet had found Alexandria about a year ago and had been here ever since. Layla knew all too well about traumatizing events.
"Layla, i'm sorry" I said and kissed her forehead. "It's okay, I know you don't mean to say jackass things sometimes." she hit me in my arm and let go of me to finish unloading. I smiled at Layla and continued to unload as well.
"Do you hear that?" Layla looked into Alexandria. I put my hand on my gun and looked inside. "That sound!" she said and looked at me. I tried my best to hear the same sound Layla claimed to hear.
"What sound?" I was really confused at what Layla was hearing.
"Ron banging Enid's brains out!" she said extremely serious and started laughing.
I started to laugh at how stupid and dirty Layla's sense of humor was.
"You're such a pervert." I scolded her in a playful way and she put her tongue between two of her fingers.
•••••
I hung my baseball styled t-shirts and flannels up in my closet. That's basically all I wore, I was no fashion expert and cared nothing for it. Judith folded my pants and put them away for me. She looked down for a few seconds and let out a sigh.
"Come here, you." I called to Judith and she ran into my arms.
"Are you ok?" I asked wanting to know what her sigh was for.
"I really miss mommy."
A sharp pain shot into my heart and wasn't going to go away anytime soon after hearing what I'd never thought I'd hear her say. I looked at Judith not really knowing what to say.
"Why did the bad guys have to make her leave us?" she asked again and that pain wasn't going anywhere now. I filled Judith's head with such a lie. I filled my dad's head with the worst lie I could have ever told.
Now it saddens me because I will never get to tell anybody the truth about why the person I loved more than anything on this planet left that one day, two years ago. It saddens me even more that I will never mend that broken piece in my heart that was only ever meant for her.
"Because there are bad people in the world that don't care that they are bad. It's a sad thing to think about, but don't worry Judith. I'll never let anyone or anything take you away from me. You won't lose your big brother ever." Judith nudged her way into my arms again and I ran my fingers through the top of her hair.
"I can't lose you, Carl." she said into my chest.
"You won't Judith."
••••
"Ron, don't you dare!" Enid protested and he grabbed her, falling into the lake. Splashing Layla and I both as they plummeted into the water. Ron and Enid had surfaced from the lake water. "You're next Layla!" Ron pointed at her and laughed.
Layla flipped him the middle finger and shook her head. "Not a nice finger!" Ron pouted and Enid jumped on his back.
"My turn!" Judith yelled and jumped in the water. "Come here you!" Ron grabbed Judith and threw her up in the air. Judith laughed until her stomach couldn't take it all. "Jude, be careful! Hold on to Ron ok?" I called out and she nodded her head.
"Watching them play like this almost makes me forget how the world really is outside of these gates." I told Layla and she looked at me.
"Sad thing is, I won't ever forget how the world really is." Layla replied and I mean, what she's been through.. she was right to think that.
"Water is nastier than my ass!" I hear from behind me and see Abraham and his 4 months pregnant wife Rosita walking by. I rolled my eyes and laughed at him. He's always saying some weird shit and everybody in Alexandria knew that. Most of the time Abraham would say some things nobody really understood. He was awesome to have around and made Layla feel safe, ever since he'd found her that one day.
"Language!" Judith reminded
"Abraham, if you see Sam tell him to come in! The water feels great." Ron told Abraham and I stopped.
"Wait what who?" I jumped up and Ron looked at me funny. "My brother Sam, Sam Anderson. Earth to Carl, come on man." Ron splashed water and me and I broke a fake smile.
Layla looked at me knowing I thought Ron meant my son Sam. My son Sam who I had no clue where he was and how he was. I genuinely longed to see him and how big he's gotten..
Layla and I stood on the dock and she smiled watching Enid, Ron, and Judith all having so much fun in the water. She sighed to herself and looked down. I know she wanted what they had, I know Layla wanted it more than anything.
I did too, but with one person in particular. The mother of my child, the girl whose dad saved my life all those years ago
The girl that I had not seen in two years. One person in particular that I had not stopped loving and missing for two years.
My girl
Ella Greene