"No, I want you to listen to me. You told me your truths. Even the ones that hurt. And they really meant a lot to me. I want to tell you the truth now, more than anything, but I don't know what my truths are!" he said. I nodded and looked at his sad blue eyes.
I started to listen to his words. I started thinking about flying.
"And that hurts. I feel that there's something locked up inside of me, and it's eating me alive. I want to tell you what's going on, but I don't even know myself, and I hate it. I hate it so much."
Waterfalls. Wings. Waterfalls. Was at the waterfall. I went flying. I sat on the rocks. I sat alone on the cliff. I was alone. I was wrong.
"I just want to know why I hurt when I kiss people, or why I can't remember so much of my childhood, or why I can't get close to anyone except for you."
I went flying, I went flying, I went flying. I was flying on my own. NO! I wasn't on my own. I wasn't on my own. I wasn't on my own.
"I want to know! And it's not fair and I don't want to cry in the dark anymore."
I was flying, at the waterfall. I was flying with someone. I was holding them in my arms. I was carrying them above the water.
"I want my eyes to adjust to the dark of my mind. I want it all to just clear up, and I want it all to make sense again, and I want to see what it is that's hurting me!"
A hint of black. A hint of blue. I was on the cliff. I was alone. NO! I was kissing. I was kissing!
"Because right now I'm trapped in a sick game where everyone knows's everything except for me. And I think if I knew what was going on, then I would want to kiss you. But I can't."
Sketchbooks, Forget Me Nots, tears. Why am I always crying? Why do I always cry?! Because I miss them! I miss him! I miss him so much! I miss the blue eyes and the black hair and the light laugh and the happiness he felt!
It exploded inside of me. It towered above everything I felt. Every one of his words scratched my insides. They were all real. I felt them too. The words were so strong. I wanted him. I wanted to remember. I was going to remember.
"Dan, what are you-"
I miss everything that we used to share.
I miss him.
I miss our love.
I miss Phil.
"Dan, are you okay?"
Phil. My Phil. He's my Phil. I lost him. And then I found him. I found him. I know him. He was my friend. We were there together. He was flying with me. We drew together. We draw together. We go on adventures. I found him! Phil. How could I forget Phil? How could I ever forget my precious Phil?
"It's really you," I mumbled.
Phil looked at me. "Of course it's me," he laughed.
I pulled him close to me. I held him in my arms.
"Dan, what's going on?"
"Nothing. Nothing. But I promise you, it'll be okay."
He nodded into my chest.
I felt tears pricking behind my eyes.
"C'mon, Phil. Let's get you home."
☾❀☽
All night I tried to think of it.
I stole Phil's memories. I stole mine.
And I got them back.
I had to make Phil remember. But he might not be ready.
And then it struck me.
If I could remember Phil, then maybe I could remember more.
I could remember them. I could find them.
☾❀☽ ☾❀☽ ☾❀☽
A/N:
This is short on purpose, I just wanted to have a powerful memory chapter.
Tell me what you thought! Vote if you enjoyed.
The next one I do will be back at normal length, I promise.
Have a wonderful day.
-Jenny