Kian's mother held her warm coffee mug close to her chest as she stared out the kitchen window to the pool area with a look of confusion. Meanwhile, Kian was chopping up random fruits for Mady's morning snack.
"What on earth is she doing," his mother asked quietly.
"It's yoga," he replied.
"Is that a higher level of it? I don't know anyone who can do that upside down...looks like it hurts."
"She's been doing it for a long time, mom. She's okay."
Kian smiled & popped a grape into his mouth before joining Mady outside. She let's herself down out of the difficult yoga position and sat upright on her mat.
"I took a grape," he spoke as he chewed.
"It's fine." She took the bowl.
"I was thinking," he began as he sat down on a nearby patio chair. "I could take you to Malibu later and show you around since you've never been and-"
"No thank you," she interrupted.
"No? Why not?"
"I'm not really in the mood to explore today." She took a deep breath and ate a piece of cantaloupe.
"Oh," he sighed. "So you just wanna stay in...wanna watch some movies? Or we could meditate together or--"
"Do you still love Lucy?"
Kian was stunned. "No. Why would you ask me that?"
She turned to face him directly. "Look me in the eye and tell me you don't love her."
"Mady, where is this even coming from? I thought we were havin' a good time, just us two."
Mady folds her arms and gives him the quizzical brow.
"Okay, okay," he said, putting his hands up. "No need to burn lasers into my forehead. I don't love Lucy. Can you please tell me where this came from now?"
"You talk in your sleep, you know?"
"I know."
"I told you I loved you while you were sleeping and you said I love you too, Lucy. And that really hurt me."
Kian struggled to find the words but instead bursted into a slight laughter. "I can't control what happens in my dreams, babe. I wasn't aware, I wasn't lucid dreaming. I'm sorry you had to hear that."
"Hm." Mady stood up & with her bowl of fruit she left Kian to go back upstairs to his room.
"Mads," he called out. "Come on."
But she ignored him. Kian took a deep breath and went on his phone. He looked through his photo gallery and came across cute old pictures of he & Lucy. A tiny smile grew but soon it faded. Out of impulse, he deleted the pictures.
. . .
John wakes up and Nadia wasn't in bed next to him. He looks around the guesthouse bedroom and sees no sign of her but he hears a thump in the bathroom.
"Nadia?" He calls out.
He gets out of bed, puts his boxers on and heads toward the bathroom. When he pushes open the cracked door, he sees Nadia crouching over the toilet, groaning in her bra & underwear.
"Shit, you okay?"
"No," she cried.
"What's wrong?"
"I'm sick, obviously." She was a little grumpy.
"Do you want some water or ginger ale? Maybe some Pepto?"
"Save it," she rolled her eyes. "That won't matter. I'm late...and I think we're in trouble."
John's eyes grew wide. "You're...are you sure?"
"Don't you remember who I am, John? My entire life is written down in a daily planner. I know when I'm supposed to get my period and that bitch missed the bus!"
"I thought we were careful." John felt his stomach trembling with nervousness.
"Maybe I missed a pill...or two. I just started taking them 3 months ago and I'm still getting used to the routine."
"What, you didn't put that shit in your planner too?!"
"Don't get smart with me, Swazz. Just...help me up."
John picks her up and carries her back to the bed. "What are we gonna do?"
"Obviously you don't have to do anything. Me, on the other hand, I'm gonna make an appointment to see the doctor and make sure I'm not just stressed out."
"What would you be stressed about? It's summer break and we've been fuckin' almost everyday."
"Not helping!" She yelled.
. . .
"Whatever happened to that Derek guy," Lucy asked as she relaxed on the donut pool float.
She was at Nate's, relaxing in his beautiful pool. They had music playing on a Beats Pill. He dips underwater for a second and pushes his wet hair back off his face.
"I don't know," he shrugged. "I don't talk to him anymore."
Lucy sighed & squinted beneath her sunglasses. "I'm bored. Let's do something tonight."
"What do you wanna do?"
"Nate," his little brother Stew yelled from his balcony.
"What?" He shouted back.
"Mom's at the store & wants to know what you want for dinner!"
"It's whatever, I'm goin' out tonight!"
Stew goes back into his room and Nate shakes his head. "He always gotta broadcast our business to the neighborhood & shit. Anyway, what did you wanna do?"
"There's a rave tonight at Cascadia, wanna go?"
Nate laughs. "I don't do raves."
"Come on, it'll be fun. It's not like we're gonna pop pills or anything. They have these shots for 2 bucks that they serve in test tubes. I mean, 2 bucks each? We'd get so fucked up."
"And that wack ass music?"
"Once you drink, you won't even remember how much you hate it," she grinned. "Pretty please!"
His mouth twisted a little. "Nah."
"Fine. I'll go by myself."
Nate rolled his eyes. "Don't do that."
"What? You said you didn't wanna go, so..."
Nate went underwater again, swimming beneath Lucy. He got her with a sneak attack, flipping her over & making her scream.
"Asshole!" She laughed.
"I'll go with you." He swam close around her. "But don't go fuckin' crazy."
"Sir, yes sir."
. . .
Cascadia was hidden in the hills. No main road led to it. You just had to search for the secret party's signals...like a single firework, a couple balloons, or just follow the vibration of the bass off in the distance from where you're supposed to park or be dropped off. The building was abandoned with no roof and some walls missing. The walls that remained were covered in graffiti and paint. The party is the L.A. rave scene's little secret that happened only twice a year.
Lucy and Nate took back to back shots, a total of 4 each so far. They were feeling the drum & bass music blaring from nearby speakers. The energy was electric.
"I told you it would be fun," Lucy spoke loudly & close to Nate's ear.
Nate nodded, not wanting to agree with her, but he wasn't having a bad time at all. He was there with her and that was all that mattered. He didn't know how to dance to this music but he enjoyed how carefree Lucy was being, how much she was letting go. She tried to get him to dance along but he simply nodded his head to the deep beats.
Suddenly her smile faded once she looked past him. He turned around to find what she was looking at and that's when he saw Kian & Mady had joined the party.
"...Do you wanna go back home?" Nate asked Lucy.
She rolled her eyes. "Nope. Fuck him."
A shot girl passed by them & Lucy stopped her, handing her $4 for another 2 shots, an extra dollar for a tip. She took both shots herself & grabbed onto Nate's wrist to pull them deeper into the crowd where they would barely be seen. She flung her arms over his shoulders and he held onto her waist. Her eyes remained closed as she searched for that free feeling again. Flashes of green, blue, and pink flickered across her face from the strobe lights. The song hit a slow & ambient break and Nate wanted to kiss her badly. But then the bass kicked back in and Lucy began jumping around.
Big Mike came out of nowhere with a purple-haired girl on his back and a whistle in his mouth. Happy to see Nate, he fistbumped him and kept it moving through the crowd.
"You have to at least move side to side," Lucy suggested.
"This ain't my kind of music," he laughed.
"So what?" She tilted her head back.
They were both feeling the alcohol now & Nate was feeling bold. So he went for it. Before he could even stop himself, his lips found her neck. Instead of stopping him, she put her hand behind his neck, encouraging him. He stopped to look at her and he couldn't ignore the bit of guilt; how he even was able to get to this point. Usually he didn't give a fuck about who or what he sabotaged but everything was different with Lucy. Nate knew he loved her more than Kian ever could.
"I have something to tell you," he shouted through the music.
Lucy laughs. "No you don't. You're within inches of my face and I haven't run away...what are you waiting for?!"
Nate gulped as he battled himself inside. But it was her who pulled him in for a kiss. It was like a thousand doors opened up for everyone to file outside; kissing her felt like the room was now empty. Even the music changed in his head & he questioned what was in those shots.
From far away, Kian spotted them while Mady was trying to negotiate with the bartender. They were selling water bottles for a dollar each but Mady wasn't having it. She had no idea that her boyfriend's heart was currently dropping in his stomach. He finally got a taste of what Lucy felt when she saw him & Mady for the first time. Maybe he was lying to himself all this time that he was over her. But it was too late now, for both of them.
Oblivious to Kian's reaction, Lucy and Nate left the party and quietly continued their making out session in the back seat of an Uber all the way back to Nate's. An Uber driver has never felt more uncomfortable and he probably gave them 3 stars.
Nate's house was big enough that he could sneak Lucy in without a problem & he did. When they got to his room, she kept the lights on dim.
"Could you unzip my skirt," she asked him in a soft voice.
He knew what was about to happen. Lucy could easily unzip the skirt herself but she just wanted to be touched. He caressed her shoulders before he began to unzip, but he stopped.
"Fuck," he whispered, getting angry at himself.
"I'm not even undressed yet," she chuckled & turned around. "What's wrong?"
Nate took a couple deep breaths and had her sit down on the bed. He paced around his room and didn't even realize Lucy took off her top. Her lace bra was making temptation even harder for him.
"You're about to hate me," he began. "I don't even know where to begin."
"I believe the beginning would be a good spot to begin," she drunkenly laughed.
Nate sighed. "It's my fault you and Kian broke up."
"No it's not," Lucy scoffed.
"Yes...it is. Back in senior year, I asked my friend to plant some cheap underwear in his bag so that you'd find it and get mad. But she instead found those pictures and went with her own plan. I had nothin' to do with the pictures bein' spread, that was all Madison & Cameron. Mahogany gave them to Madison. It all blew out of proportion. And I guess the whole thing crippled your relationship to the point where it became strained and I guess that's why Kian took the drugs that night. This is all because of me and how bad I wanted you back. I love you so much I couldn't even bring myself to make love to you just now without gettin' it off my chest, finally. And I understand if you wanna go home & never talk to me again."
Lucy stared up at him with wide eyes...then broke into laughter. Nate was confused. She stood up and hugged him, patting him on the back.
"You're a good friend," she told him. "I'm sorry your needs & wants triggered a series of unfortunate events...but I don't hate you."
"You don't?"
"Nah. You literally did one thing then it got outta control. Everyone else knew what they were doing. It's not your fault that Mahogany didn't know how to follow instructions. It's not your fault Madison & Cameron were so consumed with revenge that they lost themselves. And it's not your fault Kian wasn't strong enough to stay away from snorting a line in a fuckin' bathroom."
"I-I don't..."
"Shh," she placed her finger on his lips. "It's in the past. I gotta admit...your plan would've sucked. Kian used to buy me lingerie all the time, I'd only think it was for me."
A smile grew on his face & a weight was lifted from his shoulders. His hands wrapped around her bare waist but she pulled them off.
"That doesn't mean you're gonna go unpunished," she smirked.
"What's my punishment." He bit his bottom lip, wanting to kiss her like before.
"No sex. I'm gonna go to sleep in your bed wearing only this. You can watch me all you want, but you can't touch."
"...You sure you don't wanna hate me? This sounds like more torture," he laughed.
"That's the point," she whispered. "Goodnight."
"W-wait not even in the morning?"
"Nope," she giggled.
. . .
Nadia was looking the roughest she's ever looked, like she just woke up wearing John's black hoodie. At the doctor's office, she signed her name on a couple pages and left the building. John was waiting outside nervously in his car. He unlocked the door & Nadia got in.
"Well?" He asked.
Nadia sighed and moved all her hair to one sighed. "I'm pregnant," she spoke with a raspy voice. "I'm definitely...pregnant."
"Now what? Do you wanna make an appointment at the abortion clinic?"
Nadia's face contorted and she looked at John with disgust. "No, I'm not making an appointment. Ugh. People can do what they want but I don't believe in abortions, John. You know this."
"I know but it's always different until it happens to you personally."
"Yes, I know."
"So what are we gonna do? I can't afford to have a baby, we didn't even start sophomore year yet."
"Look, I don't know!" Her tone raised. "Maybe we'll give it up for adoption...but I'm gonna have to go through this process with or without you. I'm not killing it."
John glanced down at her stomach then ahead at the parking lot. "You're not goin' through this alone, Nadia. Okay? I'm here."
As she begins crying, he reaches for her hand and kisses it. He had no idea how to even begin preparing to become a father or how to emotionally prepare if they decide to give it away. Nadia was even more terrified. But they were going to be doing this together, accepting the responsibility no matter what.
_____________
Author's Note:
Hmmmm, give me those thoughts on everything.
Especially my ride or die's, give me those 22 comments per person lmao
Love u guys!
vote & comment! xx