LISTENING TO MY VINYL WHILE WRITING THESE STORIES MAKE IT SOME MUCH MORE BETTER TO WRITE :)) AHA
TWO UPDATES AINT YOU LUCKY ;)
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APRIL
When I woke up I looked to my side and saw William still sleeping but instead of the feeling of adoration I normally would have looking at him, I felt nothing. That was my first sign that I was the girl I was over six years ago. The one who didn't care or feel anything towards anyone. The one who had a her mind set on one thing and that was it. Being this girl was good in one sense, that I could protect William better but in another I was scared behind this girl. I was scared that no one would be able to bring me back after all this is over.
I slowly got up but with my bad luck William woke up. Rubbing his eyes like always making me roll my eyes, which was something I never did at my son. I always found everything he done cute. This was the second sign for me.
"Mummy?"
"Yes?" I said bluntly.
Talking bluntly and with no emotion was the third sign.
"What are we doing today?" He asked getting up like I was.
"I don't know" I muttered looking through my suitcase for something to wear today.
"I want to do something exciting. Something outside. I haven't been outside for a couple of days. I mean the back garden but that isn't out, outside. I want to go outside and do something fu-"
"William will you shut up for one second!" I shouted annoyed.
Sign four. I never shouted at my son for no reason, plus his rambling use to be my favourite thing.
After the words came out of my mouth, nothing else was said. I didn't hear anything from behind me apart from a couple of sniffles. I turned round and saw him clenching his fist. He stared wide like he was trying to stop the tears from falling but Unfortunely he was failing. Tears fell and I didn't feel sad or bad. God I hated this me sometimes. He choked when he tried to speak but stopped himself.
"Will-"
"What's going on here?"
I looked away from William and towards the door. Anne stood there was the boys and Gemma standing behind her. They must've all heard me.
Anne looked at me and then at William who was silently crying a metre away from me.
"Come on William, lets go get some breakfast!" Anne cheered taking the boy away from me, which I silently thanked her for. Gemma followed her making William laugh with funny faces on the way down the stairs.
I would've smiled at the interaction if I weren't this me from over six years ago.
I turned back to my suitcase, chucking things to the floor until I found something I wanted to wear.
"What was that on about?" I heard a voice speak from the door way, reminding me that the boys hadn't left yet.
"He was annoying me." I said bluntly without looking at who was speaking.
"Your own son was annoying you?"
That sentence made me look at the voice of the person who was speaking. Harry.
"Son? Like you would know anything about that right? I mean you don't want to even be apart of his life, at least I'm trying." I smirked at him as I saw his face drop, that's when I slammed the door in their faces.
I didn't want to deal with them yet.
HARRY
"William will you shut up for one second!" I heard April shout from her room.
I walked out of my room and saw everyone else was doing the same. We all looked at each other before walking behind my mum towards April's door.
"Will-"
"What's going on here?" Mum asked and April looked up at her, almost scared. I heard mum sigh sadly, like she knew this was going to happen soon. Like she as sad of the turn out. "Come on William, lets go get some breakfast" Mum said taking William down stairs with her and Gemma, leaving me and the boys still standing in the doorway.
April turned back round to her suitcase and carried on going through it like we weren't even there, so I spoke.
"What was that on about?" I asked but she didn't even bother looking up at us, let alone me.
"He was annoying me."
She sounded so blunt, like she didn't even care. I just couldn't understand how her own son could annoy her. I mean she loves William and from what I know has never shouted or even said anything bad about him. She was a great mum.
"Your own son was annoying you?" I said shocked.
Suddenly her head snapped up to where we were standing and she got up and walked towards us, almost angry at what I just said.
"Son? Like you would know anything about that right? I mean you don't want to even be apart of his life, at least I'm trying." She smirked and then slammed the door in my face before I could even get another word in.
My face dropped the moment them words came out of her mouth and I knew this wasn't the same April from yesterday. I knew this would happen and now I understand why my mother's sigh was so sad, she knew this was going to happen to. April turned back into the emotionless bitch she was before I came into her life, maybe even worst. However that wasn't the only thing that made me feel hurt, it was her words.
"...at least I'm trying"
It was like what Louis was saying to me last night.
"You really aren't trying are you?"
"You're not even trying to not be like him Harry."
They were both right. I wasn't trying. I wasn't trying to be someone I wanted to be and I wasn't trying to be William's father. I ran away from both of them because I didn't want to deal with that problem. Not now at least. Not when we have other problems like Peter Styles.
"Harry? You ok mate?" Niall's Irish accent snapped me out of my thoughts.
"No but I will be." I stated and he frowned. "She was right you know. I'm not trying. It's like what Louis said last night. I'm not trying to be who I want to be or even trying to be William's father. I'm running because I don't want to deal with the problem." I stated making all the boys shocked, probably because I actually listened to them this time when normally I don't.
"You remembered what I said to you last night?" Louis asked curious.
"Yea I did."
"Why don't you do something about it then? Start trying and stop running" Niall said like it was the easiest thing in the world.
"I cant. Not now. Not when we have other bigger problems like Peter Styles and April being like this isn't helping the situation. It's better to wait until after" I announced and they nodded.
They might've not liked my idea but they definitely understood why and what I was doing which I am glad of.
"Come on, we have to make a plan to get Peter Styles anyway" I announced, filling the silence as we started to walk away from April's door.
"Don't worry I already have a plan."
Her voice filled the silence behind us and we all stopped in our tracks. We all looked at each other before slowly turning round to see her standing there. Dressed all black, hair up in a pony tail, with a gun in her hand, she wasn't even hiding it in case William came up the stairs. She had such confidence in her voice and the smirk on her face made me scared of what her plan was.
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I KNOW I KNOW ITS NOT THE BEST AND ITS ANOTHER FILLER BUT IT HAD TO BE DONE. IM GOING TO TRY AND MAKE THE NEXT CHAPTER BETTER AND MORE EXCITING I PROMISE AND I WILL PROBABLY UPDATE AGAIN TONIGHT BECAUSE IM IN THE MOOD TO WRITE SOOOO :)
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