Chapter 13
Cheryl looked at herself in the mirror of the lift and quickly fished in her bag for her lipgloss. She moved closer to the mirror and applied some to her lips then took her keys out of her bag.
She smoothed down her dress as the lift doors opened and took a deep breath, walking out and in the direction of Kimberley’s door.
She lifted a hand to put the key in the door and stopped as she saw her hand tremble. She took a deep breath and leaned against the door. She put a hand to her hair, pushed some stray hairs off her face and pressed the door bell.
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Kimberley was upstairs applying lipgloss as she heard the door bell. She glanced at the clock on the wall. Surely that wasn’t Cheryl – she still had 10 minutes, and Cheryl had a key.
Kimberley quickly smoothed her dress down and looked at herself in the mirror of her bedroom. She grabbed her perfume bottle and sprayed some then ran out of the door and down the stairs.
She looked through the spy hole and saw that Cheryl was indeed 10 minutes early. Kimberley quickly opened the door and smiled shyly at the other girl standing there.
“You’re early” she observed.
Cheryl shrugged her shoulders and pouted, and Kimberley felt her heart jump a little at the sight. “I thought I’d make an impression”, Cheryl replied.
Kimberley laughed, “I think we both know it’s me who should be trying to make an impression” and she opened the door wider for Cheryl to go in. “Did you forget your key?”
Cheryl held up the key she had almost used to let herself in, and smiled shyly. “It felt a bit weird - just letting myself in”.
Kimberley sighed and smiled sadly. “You look lovely” she observed, gesturing at Cheryl’s dress.
“This old thing?” laughed Cheryl. “Nah, first thing I pulled out the wardrobe. You, on the other hand, look like you made the effort – you look amazing”.
Kimberley blushed at the compliment and took a step forward, leaning in and kissing Cheryl on the cheek, closing her eyes. Cheryl instinctively put her hands on Kimberley’s waist, and Kimberley stayed where she was, resting her cheek on Cheryl’s.
Cheryl took a deep breath and closed her eyes, breathing in the familiar scent of Kimberley’s perfume. She felt Kimberley’s hand on the back of her neck and pulled away slightly.
“Babe, you’re trembling” she said, concerned, looking into Kimberley’s eyes.
Kimberley smiled. “I’ve been like this all morning – like a nervous wreck”.
“Well, you should know by now that I don’t bite” joked Cheryl, putting a hand on Kimberley’s arm. Kimberley laughed and Cheryl smiled. “I’ve missed you”.
Tears filled Kimberley’s eyes. “Oh Cheryl, I’ve missed you too, so much”.
This time Cheryl moved in and wrapped her arms around Kimberley’s neck, holding her tight. A tear rolled down Kimberley’s cheek as she put her arms around Cheryl’s waist and pulled her in as close as she could.
“I am so sorry”.
“Shhhhh,” whispered Cheryl. “Don’t cry, babe. You know I can’t bear it”.
“But Cheryl, I am, I can’t believe how stupid I’ve been, it’s like it wasn’t me. Please let me explain”, Kimberley pulled away and took hold of Cheryl by the arms.
Cheryl smiled, tears in her eyes. “That’s why I came – to fix this”.
“Sh*t!” muttered Kimberley, letting go of Cheryl and running into the kitchen.
Cheryl turned and followed the other girl, finding her bent over the open oven door, smoke billowing around her. “You’ve burnt the food? You don’t burn food - you’re little miss perfect in the kitchen!”
Kimberley looked over her shoulder at Cheryl, tears rolling down her face. “It was meant to be perfect”.
“Aw babe,” said Cheryl walking over and bending down to help Kimberley up. “It’s fine, really. If I’m honest I’m not even hungry – I’ve had no appetite all week.”
Kimberley turned off the oven and wiped the tears from her face. “This just isn’t going like it was meant to go, Cheryl. I wanted to cook you a lovely meal and for everything to be like it used to be – us sitting at the table, eating, talking, just being us”.
Cheryl nodded slowly. “Well ok, so the main course is ruined. Why don’t we just have dessert?”
Kimberley stared at Cheryl then leaned forward, taking her face in both her hands and kissing her passionately on the lips. Cheryl put a hand out behind her and grabbed the table to support herself, pulling her face away from Kimberley’s.
“Babe, no”, said Cheryl, shaking her head.
Kimberley stared back at her. “No?”
“Oh babe, I meant dessert – because there’s no main course – like ice cream or something, I didn’t mean…oh I’m sorry...” Cheryl noticed Kimberley starting to blush and took her hand in hers. “Kimberley, it’s not that I don’t want to – of course I do, but we’ve got stuff we need to sort out”.
Kimberley sighed. “Could I make more of a mess of today?”
Cheryl smiled, “it’s not that bad. I mean, you only burnt the food because I was early for the first time in years. And well, the fact that you were so up for dessert…well that’s a compliment for me isn’t it? Like, I’m so irresistible that you just couldn’t help yourself, even if it’s inappropriate!”
Kimberley laughed, but her smile quickly faded. “I didn’t want to sleep with Justin. I know I didn’t answer you when you asked, and that made everything ten times worse, but honestly, I didn’t want to – I wouldn’t have”.
“I know.” Cheryl’s smile faded too. “Did he tell you he came the other day?”
“Well, he texted to say he’d been. But we haven’t actually spoken – I told him I can’t see him”. Kimberley turned and opened the fridge, taking out a bottle of white wine and holding it up to Cheryl. Cheryl nodded and passed behind Kimberley to get glasses out of the cupboard, gently putting her hands on Kimberley’s waist as she walked past.
“I asked him to go and see you,” continued Kimberley, opening the bottle. “But I didn’t tell him what to say – I swear. I just asked him to tell you the truth about that day…” and her voice trailed off.
Cheryl put the glasses down on the table in front of Kimberley and sat down at the table. She nodded. “That’s what he did.”
Kimberley poured wine into both glasses then sat down at the table opposite Cheryl. “I don’t know what was going on in my head. I really don’t. I should have told you how much the press attention was freaking me out, but I just thought I’d get used to it, or that it would die down a bit. But it didn’t, and I just went into a panic about how things were going to be…”
Cheryl was looking at Kimberley, holding the stem of the wine glass with both hands and turning it slowing.
“The whole thing with Chloe – I told you the truth about that. It really did make me feel guilty and that’s the only reason why I started meeting Justin – the only reason. But…well, while I was starting to feel sick at the thought of constantly having the press following my every move, there was Justin. I love spending time with Chloe and suddenly it just become so noticeable – the fact that we were having a laugh, and spending hours just walking round the park or round the shops and not even getting noticed by paps. It was just so different to how things were with us.”
Cheryl sighed. “I should have noticed, babe. I should have known it would affect you. I’m just so used to it now, I didn’t even think about how it might have been making you feel.”
Kimberley shook her head. “That’s no excuse for what I did.” She reached forward and put a hand on Cheryl’s. “But I swear I’ve regretted it every moment of every day since then. The way it all came out – I hurt you and that’s something I never thought I would do.” A tear rolled down Kimberley’s face and Cheryl squeezed her hand.
“I’m made of tougher stuff than that, you know,” and she smiled.
“No you’re not – you cry at the slightest thing – I’m supposed to look after you and I did the complete opposite. I made you run off into the night and not come back - I can’t believe I upset you so much”. Kimberley wiped the tear away with the back of her other hand.
“I’m here now, aren’t I?” Cheryl said softly. “I do get it, Kimberley – why you freaked out, why you tried to block it out by spending time with Justin. I can get past that...”
Kimberley frowned. “I sense a ‘but’?”
“Well, I know I said I was tough, but I can’t help but get this horrible feeling, Kimberley. A week ago I thought we could get through anything, but…” Cheryl hesitated for a second.
Kimberley stood up, the sound of her chair scraping against the floor breaking the silence. She crouched down next to Cheryl, putting her hands on Cheryl’s knees. “Cheryl we can, we still can. I will do anything it takes to make things ok again”.
Cheryl looked into Kimberley’s eyes. “I’m scared I can’t make you happy”.
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Chapter 14
Kimberley frowned, still looking at Cheryl. “You do make me happy.”
Cheryl shook her head. “It’s been less than 6 months, Kimberley. What about next year when this break’s over? I meant what I said – I’ll do anything – move abroad, quit the X Factor, but when we release our new album as a band, the press is gonna be hounding me whatever I do, and I can’t do anything about that.”
“I freaked out, Cheryl. But I’ve had time to think about things. I can’t say I like having to fight my way to the car in the morning, or having intimate moments snapped through a window, but if that’s what I have to get used to in order to be with you, then I will.” Kimberley took hold of Cheryl’s hands. “It’s not like we can’t just stay in from time to time – just the two of us, away from the cameras. I reckon it’ll make moments like that more special”.
Cheryl smiled but stood up slowly, walking over to the window and looking out. “You don’t even want people to know, Kimberley. How are you gonna feel when this gets out? I know you wouldn’t do it to hurt me deliberately, but you could freak out again. I can’t stop it from happening”.
Kimberley stood up and sat on the chair Cheryl had just vacated, leaning on the table. “I’ve told my mum, and my sister”.
Cheryl turned around quickly to look at her. “You’ve told them? About us?”
Kimberley nodded, smiling. “Last week. Part of me realised that if you were ever going to forgive me for hurting you, and trust me, that I’d have to show you how serious I was about us. But to be honest, part of me just wanted to blurt out how happy I was to be with you”.
Cheryl stared at her. “What did they say? How did they react?”
Kimberley frowned a little. “Well, they were shocked, but we talked about it, and they see what you mean to me, so they’re happy enough”.
Cheryl smiled. “I can’t believe you’ve told people” she said, walking slowly to the table and taking hold of Kimberley’s hands. She gently pulled Kimberley to her feet and stared into her eyes. “Are you really that sure that you can cope with it all?”
Kimberley smiled, nodding. “I can’t promise I won’t moan from time to time, but hey – it’s not like I won’t get constant competition off you where moaning’s concerned!”
Cheryl opened her mouth in pretend shock but quickly started to laugh, unable to hold the giggles in, and Kimberley grinned, letting go of one of Cheryl’s hands and cupping her face with her free hand.
“Cheryl, I have never been so sure about anything. I promise you it’ll be ok”.
Cheryl gently put her free hand on the back of Kimberley’s head and pulled her closer, kissing her on the lips. Kimberley lowered her hand to rest on Cheryl’s neck and slowly backed her into the fridge, where she leaned her body against Cheryl’s.
Cheryl let her hands drop slowly down onto Kimberley’s ass and heard Kimberley let out a quiet moan as she slid her hand down the front of Cheryl’s dress and started leaving small kisses down her neck.
Cheryl leaned her head back and smiled, feeling her heart starting to race. Suddenly she grabbed hold of Kimberley by the hips and turned them so she was backing Kimberley into the fridge, and she let her hands roam over Kimberley’s hips. She nibbled on Kimberley’s ear lobe as slowly pulled Kimberley’s dress up over her thighs.
Kimberley smiled and pulled her head back, turning her head slightly to whisper in Cheryl’s ear.
“I love you”.
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Kimberley woke up with a start and quickly opened her eyes. She soon realised why she’d woken up so suddenly – Cheryl must have turned in her sleep and her arm was now resting on Kimberley’s face.
Kimberley smiled to herself and put her hand on Cheryl’s, gently bringing it down to her lips and giving it a quick kiss before resting it on her own stomach.
She turned her head and looked at Cheryl, who was sleeping soundly next to her. The younger girl was sprawled out on the bed, legs outstretched like a starfish, one arm on her chest and the other now resting on Kimberley’s stomach.
Kimberley looked over Cheryl to the clock on her side of the bed and saw they had been asleep for almost an hour. She thought back to how they had fallen into bed, exhausted after their failed lunch. She smiled as she remembered how well things had turned out – she had been so disappointed to ruin the food, but in the long run things had turned out for the better.
She sighed happily as she played the last few hours back in her mind – how nervous they had both been, how she had ruined lunch, their conversation, how she had convinced Cheryl that they could make it work, and how they had... She laughed to herself, feeling herself blush at the thought. “We really should fall out more often”, she thought to herself, grinning widely.
She turned over onto her side and nudged Cheryl lightly on the hip. The younger girl’s nose twitched and she turned onto her side, still leaving her arm on Kimberley.
Kimberley moved in closer and moulded herself into Cheryl’s back, breathing in her warmth and the familiar scent of her perfume. She kept hold of Cheryl’s hand, but brought it over onto Cheryl’s stomach so she could wrap her arm round her, intertwining her fingers with Cheryl’s, getting as close to her as she could.
She kissed Cheryl’s exposed shoulder and closed her eyes, nuzzling into Cheryl’s neck, her breathing falling into synch with Cheryl’s. She really couldn’t remember ever having felt happier.
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Cheryl opened her eyes and was momentarily confused to see daylight was shining through the bedroom window. She had no idea what time it was but judging by the amount of light, it had to be the afternoon.
She turned her head on the pillow expecting to see Kimberley’s face, but realised she was alone in the bed.
Straight away she noticed something on Kimberley’s pillow and lifted herself up onto her elbows to lean over, smiling as she realised what was there in place of Kimberley – a single red rose. She picked it up and held it to her nose, breathing in its scent, and noticed a small white note attached.
She sat up in the bed and pulled the note off the stem of the flower, unfolding it. She couldn’t contain her smile as she read the short, simple note left for her in Kimberley’s familiar handwriting.
“I love you. I need you. Nothing else matters. K xxx”