As Kate stared at the album in front of her, she felt a sense of foreboding. Even if she had tried her best to make everything right, she was not satisfied with the result. Instead of feeling like she would finally be able to move on, she found herself wishing that she could go back and change the past. And she was not happy as she had assumed she would be, she felt torn into pieces.
Of course the friendship was nothing like it used to be yet but she was sure that everything would fall back in place eventually. It was not easy to overcome six years gap just like that. But now that the worst part was over, she felt optimistic that every problem would be overcome soon.
To begin with, Aidan and Jennifer were starting to get friendly with each other even if they were not quite a couple yet. She wasn’t worried about that she knew that they would get back together since they were made for each other.
The real challenge was that Ryce and Aidan were still not on speaking terms and she so wanted them to break the ice. She knew things were going to take some time to settle back but a week had passed since Ryce and Aidan had arrived and she was getting impatient. The wedding was three weeks away and time was running short.
As she flicked through the album of wedding rings Jade had selected for her, she wondered why so much importance was given to a wedding ceremony. Was it really worth it at the end? She sighed; she could hardly disappoint her mothers and sisters. They had invested so much and now even Jennifer was caught in the wedding preparations.
It was a good sign. But she had to find a way to bridge the gap between Ryce and Aidan and after that everything would be alright. Those two were closest to her heart and she had to make sure they were good friends before she went away. Hell, she was sounding pathetic even to herself. It sounded like she was dying or something instead of getting married!
Just as she was about to close the wedding ring album, she heard a sound behind her and was surprised to find Jennifer. She had made a point to avoid her ever since she had arrived at her house and Kate had assumed that she had not forgiven her yet.
“Jennifer,” she greeted letting her surprise show. There was no need for any pretense with her since they were no longer friends.
“Kate,” she said. “I think we need to talk.”
So it seemed that she was ready to talk about what happened then. And it meant that things must be looking up between them now if Jen was ready to forgive her for having broken them up.
“Sure,” Kate answered trying to sound nonchalant. She was ready for it. “Please sit down,” she indicated the space beside her. She knew there would be no fight between them. It was either going to end in a cold note or an improved relationship.
“Kate…” Jennifer began and her blue eyes were filled with regret when she looked at her. “When I got your wedding invitation, I was really shocked. And when you told me what happened on the graduation night, it felt weird. I mean I would never have guessed that you were not in your senses that day.”
At that moment, Kate wished she could be sincere with her friend and told her how much she had regretted breaking them up on that day. But it was going to be hard to voice her feelings without letting on how much she had loved Aidan. If everything was working out fine, she should continue to hide the real reason which had prompted her to act in such a way.
“Yah I know,” she said thinking twice before speaking. “I’m really sorry but I would never have betrayed you if I knew what I had been doing,” Kate told her knowing that she was not lying completely. Even if she had known that she was kissing Aidan, she had been drunk at that time and it had given her the courage which she would never have dared in her right mind.
“I’m glad to hear that,” Jennifer told her in a small voice. “I really thought you were in love with Aidan at that time.” Kate had to suck in a breath at her confession and she had make a herculean effort to keep a normal face. There it was!
“Love? Aidan?” she repeated like a parrot knowing her voice was sounding shriek as she was unable to mask the emotion of shock from it.
Jennifer let out a small laugh. “Ridiculous, I know. I never understood your relationship with the guys. Especially Aidan. I used to be so insecure around you. But even Ryce feels the same way about you as Aidan did. And I have finally realized that my insecurities were so not well-founded.”
Kate plastered a smile on her face not knowing what to say. Jennifer was right in her thinking. As far as she was concerned, both Ryce and Aidan considered her as a dear friend.
“I mean of course you don’t love him otherwise you would never have married someone else. Especially you Kate. You were such a firm believer of love and romance,” Jennifer went on oblivious to the turmoil going on inside Kate’s head.
It was not anyone’s fault if she had fallen in love with Aidan against her own will. And she would hide it for as long as she lived if it was the only thing she was going to do. It was only her love for Aidan which had spoiled her wonderful relationship with her friends . And she was going to kill it for the sake of her friends.
“Oh, Jennifer. I never knew you felt that way about me. Of course, we love each other so much. But we had the same feelings for you as well. You were part of our friendship too.”
“I know but the guys always preferred you to me. It was always more about you than me. And I always felt left out sometimes,” she confessed and squeezed her hand as if silently asking her for forgiveness as well. “That was why I reacted so drastically when I caught you and Aidan together. It was as if I had been expecting something like that to strike.”
“Oh, no, no! Don’t blame yourself, please! It was all my mistake. I should never have…,” she failed to form the words as tears filled her eyes. She could never say it. Even now! She could not saying that she should never have kissed him. Because given the opportunity, she would still have done it.
“Oh, Kate! Please don’t cry. I’m glad you never set out to betray me on purpose. I realize now that you would never have done something like that without the effect of alcohol.”
Without warning, Jennifer hugged her and Kate felt relief flood in her heart as she felt it lighter; it had not been easy for it to carry six years of guilt and remorse. And now that her friend had finally the courage to let go of the past, it was going to be easier for her to forgive herself.
“I’m glad we’ve cleared the air, Kate. I no longer feel any bad feelings towards you. You are a wonderful person and I’m glad that you have finally found your soul mate,” Jennifer delivered sounding sincere and Kate wished she could smile back at her with the same feelings.
But the last sentence sent her in her sad mode again and she was starting to tire of her self-pity state. So she smiled back with effort determined not to let her worries and sorrow visible to anyone. However, she must have done a pathetic job out of it because Jennifer immediately picked up her discomfiture.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” she replied quickly hiding behind her mass of hair. “So how is everything going on with you and Aidan?” she asked proud that her voice sounded casual. It should. She no longer loved Aidan and it should not affect her anymore.
“Oh, you know. Just so-so. We no longer hate each other and that’s a first.”
Kate smiled at her friend. It was a good sign alright but far from enough to fall in love. “You should give it time. Everything will fall back into place,” she said confidently.
“What do you mean by that?” asked Jennifer looking at her with a puzzled expression.
“I mean you and Aidan are fine, right? There’s still hope of you two getting back together. I mean Aidan still loves you and…”
Jennifer drew back in shock. “Kate! It’s been six years. Don’t be silly. When you saw us holding hands, it was just a friendly and comforting gesture. Nothing romantic.”
Oh damn! That was not what she had planned. How could Jennifer sound so detached and casual about Aidan. And besides three days earlier, she had promised that she would give her relationship with Aidan a try. “But you promised that you would give it a chance,” Kate reminded her and Jennifer grimaced.
“I know but there was so much that happened on that day. I just agreed to calm everyone down. I’m not really interested into continuing my relationship with Aidan. It’s out of question.”
Too numb with shock and disappointment to respond, Kate stared at Jennifer for a while not knowing what to say, Damn! Aidan must be looking forward to getting back to where they had left their romance.
“And besides, you give too much importance to love and romance. Like always. What Aidan and I shared had been wonderful but it was not that intense Kate. I mean we dated for three months and we didn’t even slept with each other for Heaven’s sake.”
“What?!! You’ve got to be kidding me, right?” Kate was shocked beyond words. She had never known that fact because it was too private to share even among best friends. But she would never have guessed that Aidan and Jennifer had never taken the big leap.
Jennifer smiled wistfully at her. “No, I wish. But you know Aidan. He’s not one to invest in a relationship just like that. Even if he knew me for more than six months back then. And I’m going to tell you something weird. For the past three days I have talked to Aidan, I have realized one thing. I think he’s more hurt by Ryce’s attitude than mine.”
It was so typical of Aidan. He was a relationship freak; it had always been like that. Kate felt like she should talk to him first to tell him about the way Jennifer felt. And she hoped that it was not going to be a problem considering the way he had behaved when he had arrived at the wedding.
“But Jen. I think Aidan still harbors some feelings for you and I fear that he might not digest another rejection. You should have seen the way he was when he came here. All cynical and ready to knock Ryce down.”
“I know. I witnessed that damned fight, remember? But I’ve talked to Ryce. He’s not going to fight Aidan now; he has promised me.”
Thank goodness. At least her first wish was getting fulfilled; become friends again with her ex best friends. Everybody was as good as before except for Aidan and Ryce. Those two pig-headed had stopped fighting but they were not even talking to each other yet. It was going to be tougher to break the ice between them and who better than Jennifer to help her for the task?
“Thank you! But I so wish Ryce and Aidan would kiss and make up,” she said teasingly and Jennifer giggled.
“Oh, I know what you mean. They are still acting like two spoilt overgrown boys with their egos keeping coming in between their romance.”
For the first time, Kate smiled genuinely at her friend glad that they were on the same wavelength. And she felt hope flood in her heart.
“Exactly! I think we need to plan something to make them patch up,” she said winking at her new found friend. “Why don’t we go clubbing like good old days?”
“Great idea,” Jennifer jumped enthusiastically. “You handle Aidan; I’m going to take care of Ryce.”
“Deal,” said Kate getting up wedding ring forgotten as she went in search of Aidan.
The Thornton castle was huge and could accommodate at least fifty guests at the same time. For the moment, her friends had been lodged in the west wing since more guests were expected next week. West wing was where she lived and she was not surprised to find Aidan in her study busy with his laptop. If he was not charming her parents, he was busy with his work.
“Am I disturbing you?” she mouthed at the door not wanting to get inside in case he was in the middle of something important.
Shaking his head, he signaled her to come in but was still typing furiously on the keyboard. “No of course not,” he said after a while. “Sorry I had to send an important mail. So what is it angel?”
Needless to say her poor heart nearly stopped at the use of the endearment. “I was thinking about going clubbing tonight. I know a really nice place down Manhattan; it would be just like old times. What do you say?”
“Sure,” he answered smiling at her.
And Kate did not found the courage to tell him that Jennifer was not really interested in him like she used to be. Who better than her to know how painful unrequited love was. How could she hurt him like that?
As she sat on the desk he was working on, Aidan leant back in his chair and looked at her closely and she felt her heart flipping once again. It must be her imagination because she would read something more than friendship in his every look.
But his next words blew off her mind. “You look hot,” he said looking at her with an awareness and she could not gauge whether he was serious or a mere observation from a friend. Aidan had always sent signals to her in that way and her poor heart had believed that his interest in her would grow into something else.
But there was nothing like that on his behalf and so she reacted like she always had. Lightly, trying not to make a big deal of his compliment buts he could not hide the blush which tainted her cheeks instantly. Shrugging, she smiled at him and said a neutral thank you but before she could react, she slipped off the desk and promptly fell on his lap.
Spluttering, she tried to get up but he held her tight knocking her off balance and she fell in his lap again. Surprised, she looked at him and punched him on his arms when she found him grinning at her.
“Let go of me, Aidan!” she shouted playfully and then froze as she felt it. His hard-on. It was an obvious budge under her butt and she had to swallow not to react at her latest discovery. Oh my God! He wanted her? That was news to her. How the hell was she supposed to react to that fact now?
“Never! What a timing!” he said smiling wickedly but sobered as he stared down in her eyes. His green eyes became darker emotions storming and it looked as if he wanted to say something. Blood pounded in her ears and she could hardly hear her own heart beating. Time seemed to freeze and at that moment, there was nowhere else she would rather be.
“Katherine!” she heard him say and lost in her thoughts, she felt surprised when Aidan lifted her up quickly and getting up from the chair.
Snapping out of her haze, she realized that the voice was coming from outside the study and she turned her back to the door struggling for composure wishing her face didn’t feel so hot. Hell! Whoever it was had a really bad timing.
“Katherine,” she heard again and this time she froze. Damn! Damn! It was Edward Bigfoot. What was he doing here? He was supposed to be in New York finalizing a deal and was supposed to be back in one week.
Not having enough courage to look Aidan in the eyes, she turned to the door looking anywhere but up at him and found Edward opening the door of the study room.
“There you are! I have been looking for you everywhere, sweetheart. Nobody had any idea where you could be,” Edward said greeting her with a quick peck on her cheeks.
Kate felt Aidan’s gaze piercing her back and wished she could kiss Edward more enthusiastically. She did not want him to know about her still cold relationship between her and his fiancé. It was supposed to be personal but she had no desire to kiss him, forget about enthusiastically.
So, she opted for a hug trying to look excited that her fiancé was back. “Edward! I wasn’t expecting you until next week.”
“Oh darling I closed the deal as soon as possible to be with you,” he delivered dramatically and seemed to falter at the sight behind her. So, he had finally seen Aidan. She had a premonition that the introduction was going to be lethal.
“Edward,” she said firmly trying her best not to let her voice falter. “please meet Aidan Waldorf, my best friend.”
“Best friend?” asked Edward puzzled and she could hardly blamed him. She had never mentioned any of her friends to him before and had completely forgotten to warn him that her friends were at her house when he had phoned her last week. Damn!
Thankfully, Aidan came forward and extended his hand and finally Kate looked up in his eyes and was glad to find no awkward awareness there. He was a master at masking his feelings unlike her and nobody would guess that they had been having a private moment only a few seconds ago. It had been a private moment, right?
Not even in her wildest imagination could she conjure such an intense look from him. It was going to be a hellish moment and she found herself bracing herself for the bomb. Silently sending a prayer, she watched as Edward shook his hands still puzzled at Aidan’s presence.
Aidan was looking at her in a weird way also not able to understand why she had not mentioned him to her fiancé before. Hell, she was in a fix! Nothing came into her mind at that moment to excuse her gaffe and she could only offer both of them a bland look which hid her feelings only too well.
“Nice to finally meet the lucky guy,” offered Aidan finally when Kate offered no explanation and Edward hugged her close. And noticed Aidan looking a bit miffed; it was highly likely that she had offended him by not mentioning him to the supposedly love of her life.
“I wish I could say the same here,” Edward put in and Kate finally knew how to make up for her omission.
“Edward, you were so busy with that deal that I didn’t want to disturb you with the fact that my friends were coming over. Have you met Ryce and Jen yet? No? Come I’ll introduce them to you. And we’re all going clubbing tonight. You could join us…”
“Clubbing? And you?” Edward said laughing as if she had just cracked a very good joke. Well, Edward had the ridiculous ideal perception about her being a mousy little wife and Kate had never been keen enough to clear his misunderstanding.
“Well, yes. I wanted to spend some quality time with them before the wedding,” she clarified feeling obliged to justify herself. Hell, she was going to some club with her friends; it was not as if she was going for a bachelor party or something.
“Oh, but of course you should. But not by going to a club. Come on, Kate. You have more class than that!” Edward scolded her gently and Kate sighed inwardly. Her fiancé was very snobbish and sometimes got on her nerve. But the best way to handle him was to acquiesce to his every wish as he would only persist till he gave her a headache.
“Okay,” she said resignedly brooking no argument her thoughts still on what had happened with Aidan only a few seconds ago.