(Breathtaking artwork by masseffxt on tumblr, commissioned for this chapter by MaggieShivers)
The sun is high in the sky as we start our journey homeward. My spirits are as low as my riding boots. Thranduil was right. I immensely enjoyed the mystery of it all, guessing our destination and his reasons for bringing me along. And though his motive for having me meet Lord Celeborn is still unknown, our return home feels too soon. It like an adventure has ended before even beginning. Time has slipped through my fingers again.
There will never be enough of it anymore.
I wish to still be resting under the willow as Lord Celeborn's guard plays his lute, listening to discussions of kingdoms and future plans, things which do not concern me. Despite feeling like a duckling among swans, I enjoyed the meeting. Perhaps my contribution prevented Thranduil from regretting taking me.
As the grassy fields and wildflower patches give way to thicker forest, I realize I am dreading returning. He will be occupied again, the needs of his kingdom rightly outweighing anything else. I shall not see him much until life returns to a semblance of normalcy. It will be a long time.
But for now he is still near. It is only us. I tighten my embrace.
The return journey feels only half as long as the journey there, and soon the forest becomes more familiar as we enter home territory. I steel myself for goodbye, and returning to my chambers and Gwendes with more questions than before. It is near sunset, the sky fading to powder blue as orangey light takes prominence.
Gilroch makes a sudden detour leftwards down a small, overgrown path. I lift my head and straighten. This is not the route to the King's halls, nor is it anywhere I know.
"Where are we going?"
Thranduil does not have to answer. I glimpse a shimmering gold light which reflects on the trunks of the surrounding lively oaks. It is no wonder I did not recognize the path. Last I saw it the forest was dead, but now it is as alive as the treasure it keeps hidden.
He has taken us to Laurenendë.
The water is as I remember it, its beauty now only enhanced by the forest's flora, with snow-white flowers dotting the grass near the shoreline. They are the same flowers entwined in Thranduil's crown. I spot a duck with an emerald head and yellow bill gliding across the pool's golden surface. Spring is more evident here than elsewhere in the Wood, both in season and renewal.
Thranduil dismounts Gilroch and looks up at me, his cool eyes searching yet giving away nothing in return. I move one leg over the elk to join the other, and slide down in his arms. But this time is different. When he lowers my feet to the ground, he does not let go.
I am not certain if a heart can completely turn over, but the intensity of his stare makes me believe. Or at least believe my mind is playing a cruel trick. He has never before looked at me with such longing, and I cannot believe he is now. It must be something else.
He draws me closer to him, his stare never wavering. If his hand did not have a firm grip on my waist, my legs would surely give way. He leans his forehead against mine and closes his eyes. I have never been closer.
"Rîneth."
His whisper makes me acutely aware of how close his mouth is, but I dare not close the gap. Despite appearances, it is possible the forest has not healed entirely and I am under its spell. Mirkwood has confused and tortured many a traveler with its dark magic. Not even the Eldar are immune.
He steps back, his eyes still searching mine, but for what I cannot fathom.
"I have something for you." He reaches under his robes to reveal a folded parchment. "I have had it in my keeping for a long time."
The parchment is soft in my hands, the paper having lost its crispness with age and use. I look at him, seeking an explanation, but he motions to open it.
Dear King Thranduil,
You and I are not acquainted, but we share a mutual friend. Rîneth has been my friend since she and her father visited Dale and stayed at my family's inn long ago. When I became of age and married, she loyally came to visit me as oft she could at my husband's farm near the River Running. The road became too dangerous for her to travel, as you well know, but she has never stopped sending letters. I can truthfully say she has been the most faithful friend I have ever had, and the most oblivious.
I shall get to that soon enough, but first I must tell you something important. I am on my deathbed, and I doubt I shall last to see the winter. Rîneth does not know it, and I want it to stay that way. She will take off without telling anyone and come see me, bless her, but it is too dangerous for anyone to travel, even the Fair Folk.
I am an old woman now, good King, and though not as wise as you by any means, I am wise for my kind, and have learned a thing or two about holding my tongue. I mostly say what I think, and Rîneth is no stranger to that, but there is one thing I have not told her.
She has had a rough go of things, you see, and she is holding on to the past. She is afraid of hurting again, so she feels she must live the whole of eternity alone. Tis a ridiculous notion, and I have told her so bluntly, but she is convinced it is what she wants. The truth is, she does not know what she wants, even while it is right in front of her.
I doubt there is much that gets past you, being a king of the Fair Folk, so you likely know Rîneth is in love with you. There has never been a visit or letter without her speaking of you with the highest admiration. To be truthful, I know more about you than I care to know, and as I have grown older I have had less tolerance for it, but I have held my tongue. I wanted her to figure it out on her own.
I know I said she is oblivious, but she has good reason. I do not pretend to know everything about the world of the Fair Folk, but it seems your kind complicate everything. From where I come from, dead is dead. If a spouse dies, there comes a time to marry again. I once believed loneliness was only for the Men of the world, but after knowing Rîneth, I have learned no one is immune.
And from what I have learned about you, good King, it affects you as well. Tis probably the reason for that foul temper of yours. So listen to an old woman on her deathbed. End this foolish Elvish business and marry her. You both love each other, it is as obvious as day, and its past time something is done about it.
Take care of her for me, and tell her the Elanor she planted in my garden is in full bloom. I suspect it is the last time I shall see them. They always remind me of her.
Rîneth's oldest (and youngest) friend,
Mattie
I feel a rush of heat across my cheeks as my fumbling fingers attempt to refold the letter, and I furiously blink away the forming tears. I cannot look at him. I am afraid of what I will see.
"I-I tried explaining to Mattie our ways on many occasions, but she never understood...she was highly intelligent but preferred to keep things simple."
"Perhaps she had the right idea. The Eldar complicate life far too much."
I glance down at the parchment in my hands, and at the pond, and anywhere but Thranduil. "You must not read too much into her words. I spoke of you often because of our friendship. She loved to play matchmaker, and--"
"Like you?"
My cheeks burn again. "I have not been successful at it, so it stands to reason--"
He takes hold of my chin and turns my face to his. Still I cannot meet his knowing gaze, and instead focus on a point behind his ear.
"Are you now afraid of me?"
"I am afraid you have taken an old woman's fanciful ideas to heart, and shall never think of me the same. I do not understand why you had me read it...."
From the corner of my vision I see his smirk. "Your friend was right about you. You are oblivious, even when it is as obvious as day, as she phrased it."
"I confess it." My eyes smart. "I also do not understand why you had me accompany you to meet Lord Celeborn."
"He is an old friend and knows of my trials. I shall not hide to him, nor all of Arda. But as I suspected, he already knew."
My heart turns over again, and I dare to look at him. "Knew what?"
He shakes his crowned head. "If it is not obvious to you now, it shall never be, Rîneth. I refuse to believe I have read you wrongly. But I cannot deny your confirmation would be pleasing to hear. Tell me: do you love me?"
I move away, my mind at first not allowing his words to sink in. I feel his hands on my arms as if they are still there.
"You must assure me we are under no forest spell, that your question is as real as the flames which burned our homeland."
"It is as real," he replies. "And as fervent."
His words have the effect of stealing my voice.
"If confirmation is what you seek," he says, "we shall leave now and go to your father. I spoke to him last night of that which I have kept from him."
"Your death?"
Thranduil nods. "He did not doubt what I saw and heard. Nor did he doubt the breaking of my vows with Itaril. Though I did not need his acceptance for myself, but for you."
"Why for me?"
"Why must you persist in asking these questions when you already know the answer?"
"You ask for my confirmation. May I not ask for yours?"
He strides over and takes my hand, and lifts the finger holding my ring. "Why do you believe I gave you this?"
I swallow. "For helping with your father's writings...."
"Yes, that was what I told you." He smiles wryly, and squeezes my hand before letting go. "In truth, my motive was selfish. I wished to see you wear it and pretend you were mine, even though it could never be so. I liked the idea I could claim some part of you, if only a finger."
The fluttering beneath my ribcage takes my breath. Or perhaps it is the way he stares into my eyes so brazenly.
"I consented to break my vows with Itaril," he continues. "Do you require more confirmation?"
"You told me you did it for her happiness, so she could be with the one she truly loved..."
"I am not selfless, as you have learned by now. There was a far more personal reason for me to have accepted Eru's consequence so readily."
"What is the consequence?"
He looks towards the pool, a hint of sadness passing over his features. "I shall be on the final ship to sail across the Sea, the last of the Eldar to leave Middle-earth. Manwë will send a messenger when the long-awaited day arrives. It is promised Legolas will depart long before then." His eyes return to mine. "It has...taken time for me to accept, even after making the decision, so I hope you will forgive me for my distance of late."
I feel stricken. "Why did you agree to this?"
"You know the reason."
"Surely Itaril must bear some consequence as well..."
"Yes," he says. "She and her beloved will be confined to a remote shore of Valinor, unable to live among their kin until such a time as Manwë deems appropriate."
I shake my head. "I did not know Eru to be so severe."
"Considering it is against the law of Eru for marriage vows to be broken, he has been more merciful than I could have ever believed. Before my death, my faith in the Valar was weak. Now it is stronger than it has ever been. I have been given a second chance at life."
We both fall in silence, and the chirping of the woodland sparrows grows in volume, as though beckoning us to continue. I lift my gaze to the tree limbs where the birds reside, and though I do not see them, they more real than any of Thranduil's words. For as long as I have existed, my friend could never be anything more. The mere thought was so impossible I never paid it heed, until my feelings could no longer be ignored. Until my heart betrayed me.
Even now, the impossible having become possible, I cannot grasp it. Nor can I grasp the feeling is returned...that he feels the same and has for a while.
"Rîneth..." he says. "The question."
The question. I look at Thranduil now, his blond hair a striking white as the sun hits it. He is as real as he has ever been. As real as when he lay on his bed dying only days ago. As real as when he told me the story of his past. As real as when he gave me the ring, the Star of Varda, far more than a gift for a friend. I raise my hand to look at it.
The enchanted gem is shining brighter than it ever has.
It is real. All of it.
"Yes."
He seems to hold his breath, waiting.
"Yes, I love you. I have loved you for longer than I know."
He steps forward and cups my face, the intensity of his gaze making me blink. "And Eru's consequence? Does your love for me surpass its sting?"
"If you have me, I shall wait with you for the messenger, and be by your side on the final ship across the Sea."
He closes the gap between us, and his mouth falls on mine. The force of it sends a torrent of flutters to my stomach. My hands reach up to his hair; his arms wrap around my waist to bring me closer still. It is a kiss that has waited for perhaps a thousand years and cannot be stopped now. I let his lips guide mine, let his hands keep me from falling.
Again and again he kisses me, and I return every one, my lungs remembering to breathe even as I forget. When we break apart I believe the sun has surely set, but upon opening my eyes it is shining still.
He removes my ring and places it on another finger, one which carries more promise, and gives me a slow, satisfied smile.
"Finally."