Chapter 36- What Happens Now?
The stay in the hospital had only been for a day. My doctor only kept me in for observations. After one day I was good to go. I was only advised to attend a counselling twice a week and to visit my therapist at school every once in a while. I don't know why or how, but I felt slightly better. Like what happened was now in the past. Telling Alec felt like it was closure. But obviously, that was not the case for Alec.
He had stayed with me at the hospital-- never leaving my side. And yet, he did nothing but remain silent. It was terrifying me, but every time I would ask him if he was all right, he would simply send me a smile and nod his head. I knew that he was far from all right, but I couldn't find the right words to say to him.
"When are my parents coming here?" I asked Alec as we drove back to school.
"Um, tomorrow. I'll go pick them up," he answered.
I knew that. I just needed to talk to him whatever the topic may be. After the incident the school had finally called my parents since the recent events was alarming. I didn't want them to come but somewhere deep in me was okay with it.
The car ride consisted with nothing but small talks that were initiated by me, low playing of music, and nothing but pure silence. It was making me crazy.
Not being able to take the silence anymore, I threw my hands up in frustration with a groan. The action made Alec glance at me by surprise.
"Fucking talk to me, Alec! You have not said a single word about what I told you," I hissed out.
I didn't really intended for it to come out so hard but I was masked with so much frustration, anger and oblivion. It was mad.
Instead of saying anything he remained silent. My heart's beating could be heard by my own ears. Blood was just rushing out. Beside me Alec remained nothing but passive and I let him. We stayed like that with him doing nothing and me trying to keep my cool until he had parked his car to his parking space.
Just when I was about to burst out again, Alec looked at me with his eyes bloodshot.
"What am I suppose to say? What to do you want me to say?" he asked with the words so evenly let out.
"Anything. Tell me what's going in that head of yours."
He closed his eyes and leaned his head against his headrest and let out a long sigh. After what seemed like forever he finally let it out.
"There's this girl who meant the world to me. She always made me happy even when my world seemed like ending. She held me up even when I felt like falling. She never got tired of me even when I was tired of myself. She was my best friend. That one girl I will always love. She was mine."
Words seemed like they were stuck in my throat. I wanted to touch him but he looked so vulnerable that I was too afraid to do so.
"Her happiness meant everything to me. And I just found out the reason why she's now so broken. I want to turn back time, Tori. I want to go back to that night and just not let you go out of my house. Just asked you to stay and hug you all through the night. Keep you with me-- keep you safe. And the thought of what happened, hurts me so much. I just want to fix it. And the fact that I can't is making me insane."
"We can't change it. But, Alec, I wanna try and not let him haunt me. I wanna try and move on. I want to try again with life. Help me with it."
Alec opened his eyes and looked at me. I hated how he looked at me with so much regret. I wanted to change it.
"Okay."
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It was barely past noon when a knock came from the door. We were all cuddled up in the living room as we tried to watch The Inception with full attention. Yup, the key word was 'try' since it was pretty much obvious that the previous events were still in their mind.
"I'm not getting it," Tate yelled as he plopped down the couch.
I stood up but only to be pulled back down on the couch by Sasha.
"I'll get it," she said with a glare sent towards Tate.
It was obvious what my friends were doing, but I wanted to go back to normal. All the special treatment and the looks of concern sent towards me was far from making me feel normal.
Alec must have caught the look I had and brought me closer to him. "I was thinking, I wanna have you all for myself tonight before your parents steal you away from me."
The man that I love was keeping his word and was trying his best to make me feel normal. And that made me feel beyond grateful to have him.
"What do you have in mind?" I asked, not being able to hide my excited smile.
He leaned closer to my ear. My body tensed for a moment but held it down with everything I could. No. I was not letting him ruin me.
Nothing passes Alec by. His grip on my shoulders grew tighter but in a more comforting way.
"Food? Beach? And lots of cuddling and making out?"
A chuckle escaped from my lips. "I'd love that."
"Tori..." Sasha called with hesitation in her voice.
All our heads turned to look at her. She had this confused-scared look on. A man was beside her. At the sight of the man, we all go up to our feet as we tried to compose ourselves.
"Hmm, do you guys even read the handbook?" he asked, his dominating voice echoed around the now silent room.
"Mr. Marks, I'm afraid I'm a self-proclaimed dyslexic," Tate said.
"Always the witty one, Mr. Sloan."
From my peripheral vision, I was Leo smack Tate's head.
"Mr. Marks,we know that we aren't allowed to hang out for too long in one's dorm, but we could explain this," Leo started.
Mr. Marks held out his hand with a passive look on his face. This was it, my final strike. And I had to dragged my friends with me this time. Damn.
"Spare my ears. There's no need. Go back to your movie. That has a good concept. I just need to have a word with, Tori," he said.
Relief flooded in the room. The headmaster of our school was letting this slide.
Mr. Marks made a gesture towards the kitchen before going in without me. I was glued in place, but then Alec nudged me.
"It'll be fine. Go for it," he said.
And so I did.
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Inside the kitchen, I was seated on one of the bar stools as I watched our headmaster roam the room.
"Can I get you something?" I finally offered.
He stopped abruptly and looked at me sheepishly. "No, thank you, Tori."
"Well, what can I do for, Sir."
Mr. Marks took his time walking towards he bar stool directly in front of mine. His movements were slow and calculated. Once he was seated, he placed his hands on the table.
"As your headmaster, there are things that we simply need to know," he started.
"And?"
He sighed first before saying, "And it is for your well-being. The events that were happening for the past few days were alarming, Tori. Gilbert is now your second home, and we do everything to keep you safe. And I'm here to tell you that we are willing to offer everything you need."
Then it hit me. They know.
"You know," I simply said.
"The school is willing to offer you their services. Your therapy, counselling, and medication. Everything."
"I'm not sick. I'm not crazy. I'm just a girl who was raped when she was 15. And I'm trying to get better. Now if you want to help, treat me normally. Just because I was used, it doesn't make me any different from people like you. I'm normal. We're normal. We just had a past."
A bush spread out to his face. It was evident that he was embarrassed, but I didn't feel the slightest pity for him. I was tired of people treating us like this. Sometimes we just want to get back up but the way people look at you makes you feel like you're less. They look as if you're broken and that makes me feel broken. But I knew this time, I had to stand up. I had to be better. I had to be normal, because I am normal.
"My apologies, Ms. Adams," he said.
I didn't say anything but simply nodded my head to acknowledge his apology. But that also showed that I wasn't accepting it just yet.
"I best be going."
I showed him out the door. Once the door was closed and Mr. Marks was no longer in our presence, the television could not be heard. I faced my friends, only to see them looking at me with anticipation. Even Georgia was looking.
"So?" Georgia asked.
I shrugged my shoulders. "I just gave him a little piece of advice. He was being an asshole."
Tate jumped out of his seat and ran towards me. "You are my girl."
He was about to hug me when a pillow smacked him.
"My girl," Alec hissed.
"Oh chill, lover boy. I have my own," he said winking at Sasha.
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Nothing was better than the beach plus pizza plus Alec. The shore was just calming, the pizza was fucking delicious, and Alec... Alec was just everything good.
"Did you really have to order this much?" I asked as I stared at the boxes of pizza in front of us.
"I didn't know what to get. I know how much you love six cheese pizza, and I love steak pizza, but then I remembered you also like pepperoni and I also like bacon, so I just bought all," he said as he munched away his second serving.
"But then we're only two," I pointed out as I took my second slice.
Alec looked at me with amusement in his eyes. "Oh, I know you love this. And you're gonna eat this all."
"And be unhealthy?"
"You need to add weight, love. You know I love feeding you."
"My ass is bigger than that head of yours. I don't think I want to look like the Kardashians."
His arm around me tightened against me.
"I love your ass. But just fucking eat," he whispered against my ear.
"I love you," I said out of the blue.
Beside me, Alec stilled. Slowly he looked at me with an anxious look on his face. His blue eyes stared at me intently with anticipation. But I didn't say anything else.
"Me or the pizza? I don't want the cupcake incident to happen again," he whispered.
Without saying anything, I took his pizza and placed both our pizzas back in the box. I moved in front of him (okay, fine straddling him) so that I was looking directly at him. This time I had the strength. I was not keeping anything from him. And nothing was in between us now.
"Fuck the pizza. I love you, Alec."
He pulled towards him, his head resting against my chest. My arms were around his neck and my cheeks were resting against his head. We stayed like that for a few seconds. Before he lifted his head back up again with the biggest smile on his face.
"That's probably the best thing you've every said to me. I love you more than anything," he said with excitement lingering in his voice.
My heart was beating inside my heart in an alarming way but I knew it was because of this boy in front of me. The one person I truly and really love.
Alec leaned in for a kiss, but I wanted to say something. I pulled away just a bit. He frowned for a moment but I couldn't help but smile.
"Alec Austin, will you be my boyfriend?" I asked.
"I'm the guy. I should be---"
I placed my hand on his mouth with a teasing frown. "Gender equality, my love."
He chuckled against my hand before kissing it and escaping from my hold.
"I'd love to be your boyfriend, my lady."
With that said, he leaned in and kissed me. And I knew what I want to happen. And I was making it happen. I was going to be happy.
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Me: I'm going to write
College: Lol. No.
^ here's why I'm late :(
Sorry! Anyway, here you gooo
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