"Daniel, I need your help!"
"Why are you whispering?"
"Because I'm in my kitchen store cupboard."
"Why are you in your kitchen store cupboard?"
"Because I need your help."
"I think you need professional help."
"Daniel, I'm being serious."
"What's going on?"
"How does one go about fixing a broken heart?"
"Huh?"
"Hugo... he's... heartbroken."
"Does Hugo even have a heart to be broken? From what I know, he's a love them and leave them kind of person."
"That's what I thought, too! Until he starts bawling his eyes out and lamenting the fact that someone named Lucie has stomped all over his heart."
"Well, hell."
"Exactly. Now, tell me how to fix him."
"How should I know how to fix him?"
"Because you're a man and you've had your heart broken before. You obviously know how to fix one."
"Right. In that case, get Hugo drunk, hand him a phone and get him to dial Lucia's number wrong."
"What?"
"That's how I got over a broken heart. I found a girl that was worth mending it so she could take care of it for me."
"That's very sweet, but really fucking unhelpful!"
"You asked."
"Damn it. You were my only hope, too."
"Gee, thanks."
"Who else do I know that's had their heart broken? What about Elias? Has something like this happened to him?"
"No."
"Samuel?"
"Really? You think my brother has ever been that emotionally attached to a woman before?"
"Fair point."
"What about Lucas?"
"Please, my brother's only just lost his virginity."
"Excuse me?"
"I'll explain another time. Oh, wait! Brainwave!"
"..."
"Babe, I've got to go!"
"Wait, what was the brainwave you had?"
"Brogan! I need to speak to Brogan. He'll know what to do. Ok, love you bye!"
[Call ended]