You stood still in front of the closed gate. You had heard the stories about Castle Black and the Night's Watch, but it was different to actually stand here, hoping that your old friend would let you in.
"Open the gate!" The voice of a man echoed around you and you held your breath while the doors opened and allowed you to enter the small square filled with men in black.
"Milady (Y/N), welcome to castle Black." Lord Commander Snow walked down one of the wooden stairs and he gently held out his hand to help you of your horse. "I do hope it aren't tragic circumstances bringing you hear?" Even though Jon had grown older, he was clearly still the same Jon. His black hair had grown a little longer and he had grown a little taller, but his heart was still in the right place.
You bent your head. Although you would have loved to bring him good news instead of the news of your husband's death, you couldn't change the facts. "I'm sorry, Lord Commander." You swallowed the tears away. You had cried for way too long already and it was time to move on, even though you had no idea how to do that. "My husband died recently." You looked up again and the smile on Jon's face disappeared slowly. "I wouldn't have come here if I had known anyone else who could help me."
Jon wrapped an arm around you shoulders and while all the other men were staring at you he lead you towards his private room. "I'm sorry about your loss." Jon closed the door behind him and gestured to one of the comfortable looking seats. "However, I'm afraid Castle Black is no place for a lady." He sighed and he sat down in the seat opposing you.
"I know that women are not allowed here, I do, but..." You licked your lips and you cocked your head. "You know that I know how to fight. I've heard about the white walkers and what's coming for us. I'm not only here to find shelter, I'm also here to help." You were almost begging, knowing that if Jon would sent you away, you would be lost forever. Who knew where you would end up eventually, probably in the hands of little finger or a man of his sorts.
"I've been making too many exceptions lately." Jon frowned his forehead and he tapped with his fingers on the wooden table. "I've been changing way too many rules. Allowing a woman to live among us and to fight among us could mean losing the trust of those who have voted me commander in the first place." Jon placed his elbows on the table and his chin rested in the palms of his hands.
"I know that it would be your position that's at stake, Jon..." You hesitated for a moment. "But if there had been any other solution I wouldn't have come here in the first place. Let me help." You cocked your head and took a few deep breaths. "I can teach others how to use their swords. I can cook for them. I can clean their clothes. Let me do something. Let me not end up as a hore, please."
Jon's eyes kept on staring at you and he was clearly trying to see all the possibilities you had probably overlooked. He wouldn't find any. "I will allow you to stay until I've found a different solution. I'll order my men to respect you, but I can't simply allow you to stay here."
You nodded, promising yourself that by the time Jon would come up with a safe place away from him, you would have made yourself indispensable.