December 24th, 2015
Shawn's POV
"Pooh Bear!" I heard my Granny yell my name. It sounds like she's in the kitchen or something.
"Yes, Granny?" I yelled back but she didn't say anything. Maybe she didn't hear me.
"Granny!" I yelled louder, but she still ain't respond. Fuck it!
"Man, I ain't gettin' up." I said.
"You're not what?" Granny questioned standin' in the door way of my room. My heart dropped to the floor because she heard me and scared the fuck outta me.
"Huh?" I said pretendin' to be clueless.
"What are you not going to do?" Granny asked.
"Oh nah, Granny. I was talkin' to BK." I lied. BK was sittin' up in my bed next to me.
"Is that right?"
"He swears he's not gonna get up to get the Xbox controllers, but he is. I'm about to beat him again." BK said for a matter of fact. Oh, Thank God. Granny was 'bout to beat my ass.
"Woah. Slow ya roll, pimp!" I said to BK. "You're not beatin' me."
"I need y'all to go to the grocery store for me." Granny said.
"What store?" I asked.
"Food 4 Less, or Albertsons. It d-"
"It ain't Ralph's, though!" Me and BK laughed so hard while Granny just stood there lookin' at us. She probably thinks we're high.
"Okay, go to Ralph's then, Grandson. It doesn't matter." We kept laughin' because she had no idea why we were laughin'. She didn't get it.
"What is so funny?" She asked.
"Nothing. You wouldn't understand if I told you."
"Whatever, boy. Here's a list of what I need and my card." I got up from the bed and grabbed the list and card then put them in my pocket.
"You remember my PIN number?"
"Yes, but Granny, why didn't you just text me the list? Why did you write it down?"
"Does it matter?"
"Not really. I was only wonderin'."
"Mhm. Y'all hurry up and go. It's gonna be packed in that store. I want to finish cooking. Gone na." She rushed us then left my room. BK got up from the bed too and we both put our shoes on.
"That's why you my nigga, babe!" I said throwin' my arm over her shoulder as soon as we got outside.
"You almost got beat the fuck up." She laughed.
"For real, man."
"Not all heroes wear capes."
I laughed. "You right, you right. But you should let me drive, though."
"You don't have to tell me twice." BK handed me her keys right away. I opened the passengers door for her and closed it once she was in.
"So, BK." I started when I got in the car and put my seat belt on.
She looked at me. "So, Big Head."
"I have a personal question." I turned the key in the ignition and pulled off.
"You say that as if you're not my boyfriend."
I glanced at her for a quick second. "Just because we're in a relationship doesn't mean that I'm entitled to know every single detail of your life."
"Mm. Speak for yourself."
"Speak for myself?" I chuckled. "You want to every single about me?"
"Every single detail."
"Aight. How much money do you have in the bank?"
"Was that what you had to ask me?"
"No. It leads to my question."
"Oh. I have a little over seven."
"Hundred or thousand?"
"Thousand."
"Oh, okay. I was gonna say that if you were runnin' low that you should really push for a job. I say that 'cause I know that your sessions ain't cheap. I don't want you to run out."
"They're far from cheap, but I think that I'll be okay. I meant it when I said that I didn't have enough to work. You, school, and basketball take up all my time."
"Oh, well maybe we shouldn't hang out so much."
"Maybe you should shut up." I laughed because I knew she was so serious.
"What?" I questioned. "Why do I gotta shut up?"
"You tryna get rid of me?"
"I just want you be solid."
"I'm good, Big Head." She smiled at me. "Thank you, though."
BK plugged her phone to the auxcord and played Chris Brown's latest album. She started singin'. I coulda sworn she didn't like him. Now she wants to sing like she was a huge fan or something. I just rolled my eyes and kept drivin'. But it got to the "makin' love" song. She was too happy for me. Nah!
"Man, turn this shit off." I said pullin' the auxcord out. Fuck that shit. She laughed so hard. Ain't shit fuckin' funny.
"You know I don't even like him like that." She said laughin'. "I just like this song a lot."
"Well, calm down then."
"Would it be better if I was singin' to you?"
"That's a different story." I laughed a little. BK pulled the auxcord back and continued singin'. She wasn't even singin' for real for real. She was singin' obnoxiously loud. She sang the entire way to the grocery store.
"I wanna get inside in the cart." BK said as we were walkin' to the entrance. She grabbed the cart and looked at it. She was tryin' to figure out how to get inside.
"How are you gonna get ya big ass in here?"
"Hold it so it doesn't move." I held onto the shoppin' cart and watched her climb in.
"Wow." I said she lowered her body. She didn't sit down but she held on.
"Push." She said. Oh, it's bout to be lit in this Ralph's! I pushed the cart into the store and made sure there wasn't anybody in the way. I kicked-pushed and hopped on the back of the cart.
"Chooo choooooooo!" Loudly, I said.
"Don't make us crash!" BK said laughin'.
"We're not, scary ass!"
"I'm not scary! Stop callin' me that!"
"Okay, scary Jerry."
"It's scary Gary."
"Gary? What? No. It's Jerry."
"Why would it be Jerry? That doesn't even sound right."
"And scary Gary sounds better to you?"
"Yes! It flows."
"No it doesn't, babe."'
"Yes it does!"
"Nah."
"Yeah."
"Whatever scary Jerry."
"I'm not scared!" I kicked-pushed again. I pushed BK through the whole store. We were goin' fast as shit! BK was crackin' the fuck up. Her bein' so amused was more funny than the actual ride. I knocked some shit down and that's when I knew it was time to stop. BK wanted to stay her lazy ass in the cart.
"What's first on the list?" She asked.
"A can of pineapples, for the ham! My Granny makes the best ham in the world! I can taste it now." I licked my lips.
"Greedy ass."
"I know yo 'I wake up at three in the mornin' to eat cereal' head ass ain't talkin'!"
"Cereal taste better at three in the mornin'."
"Says skinny fat people."
"Wow. I'm not even that skinny."
"You lowkey are."
"Not at all. Have you seen my thighs?"
"So, you're still skinny."
"So are you." The list wasn't even long so we were able to get in the fifteen items or less line. Thank God because I spent a lot time pushin' BK in the cart. Granny woulda been set trippin' on the kid.
"I want something sweet." BK said as we were takin' the stuff outta the bags.
"You say that now that we're at home." I said.
"You always have something smart to say!"
"Sue me." I shrugged my shoulders.
"I'm goin' to slap you."
"You hear that Granny?" I looked at her but she didn't look at me.
"BB, there's ice cream in the freezer, if you want some." Granny said. I frowned. Oh, so she don't care? Oh, aight.
"Oooh." Excitedly, BK said then went to the cabinet to get a bowl. She grabbed a spoon then headed over to the freezer to the strawberry ice cream.
"Thank you, Granny." She said wit' a smile. I couldn't help but smile at her even though she was more focused on the big bowl of ice cream.
"Oh, you're welcome, baby. Now y'all get out so I can finish cookin'. Bye." She waved us off. She ain't have to tell me twice. I grabbed BK's hand before Granny gave us something to do. We went into my room. Granny don't trip about BK bein' in here but she ain't wit' shits like that. I have to keep the door open.
Me and BK stepped outta our shoes and climb on the bed. Not before I got my remote, though. We sat shoulder to shoulder up against the headboard. I turned the TV on and started scrollin' through the channels. A bunch holiday specials. I kept it on ABC Family.
I looked over at BK to see if she was okay wit' the channel. She wasn't even lookin' at the TV. She was too busy wit' her ice cream. Greedy ass. She does look good lickin' the ice cream off her lips. Real good.
I should give her the Christmas gift right now. I hope she likes it. I hope she agrees. Damn. I shoulda asked her a long time ago. She's probably gonna say no.
I guess she felt me lookin' at her because she turned to me. "Is there something on my face?" Innocently, she asked.
"No."
"Why are you starin' at me?"
"I can't look at'chu?"
"You can look at me, but you're starin'. Hard."
Holy shit! Her eyes are slowly changin' colors. Woah! "You eyes are legit changin' colors right now." I said complete amazed.
"Are they gray now?"
"Yeah, light gray. I wish I would have recorded that." I've never actually seen her change colors until today. The coolest fuckin' thing, man.
"Is that why you're starin' at me?"
"One of the reasons, yeah."
"What's the other reason?"
"Do you know how cute you are?" She is, hands down, the prettiest girl in the world to me. Maybe not to everyone else, but to me, she is.
She smiled. "I'm not sure if I want to be cocky and feel myself. Or if I want to be bashful and humble."
"It doesn't even matter. You're gorgeous either way."
"Thank you, Big Head."
"You're welcome." BK kept eatin' her ice cream, not payin' me any attention at all. She is really demolishin' it. I would ask for some but I'ma let her enjoy. She just might say no.
She looked at me. "Was there something else?"
"You just amaze me." I shrugged a lil bit.
"I amaze you? How? I'm sittin' here, eatin' ice cream and watchin' tv."
"It's not even that."
"Then what is it, creep?"
I chuckled. "I bought- my Granny bought planes. For me, her, and Ty."
"Where are y'all goin'?"
"New York, and the timin' is perfect."
"What are you talkin' about?"
"New Year in New York?"
"Ohhhhh!" She smiled widely. "That's dope!! Y'all are gonna have fun!"
"It's not all about the fun."
Her smile slowly faded. "I don't get it."
"I'm goin' to see my dad."
"Liar." I could tell that BK didn't know how to react. She wanted to be happy for me but at the same time, she was kinda unsure and confused.
"I'm serious."
"You lie." She laughed not really believin' me. I had to laugh wit' her.
"I'm for real, BK." I said tryin' to be serious.
BK laughed while eyin' me. She noticed my seriousness and stopped laughin'. Her eyes narrowed at me. "For real for real?"
"Yeah, and I want you to come with me."
"You do?" Her eyes kinda widened in surprise.
"Yes."
"Why?"
"Because you're the reason I'm goin'."
"What?" Quietly, she asked. She needed and wanted clarification.
"You have a lot goin' on right now. Life is comin' at'chu from every angle. You're goin' to therapy now-"
"Because of you." Softly, she said.
"Not really. Deep down you knew that you needed it. Sometimes you need to hear certain things from different people. You just needed a lil push. Ya know?"
"I know."
"You goin' to therapy was that for me. It was that 'hearin' it from someone else' type of thing."
"How do you mean?"
"My Granny always pushed to talkin' to my dad, but I never cared to. I was too mad. But I met you. I see you tryin' to make things better for yourself, because you know that you need to. It just opened my eyes." BK just looked at me. I guess tryin' to make sense of it all.
"It makes sense in my head." I said and a soft smile crept upon her face.
"It makes sense in mine, too." She said.
"It's workin' for you. I can see it in your smile and hear it in your eyes. I want that. To feel lighter and to feel like there is a brighter side. I gotta start somewhere- what you'd say to me-"
"I said a lot of things, but you're probably thinkin' of 'hate in your heart will consume you'."
"Yeaah. You said something else though. It puts a strain on your future relationships and friendships."
"Yes."
"I'm startin' to get it, like really understand what that means."
"That's great," She smiled. "I'm glad."
"I want you to be wit' me when I talk to him."
"When?"
"The twenty-ninth. I know you have your sister- I should have asked you sooner. It was supposed to be one of my gifts to you, but I couldn't find the right card to put a plane ticket in. So I just figured that I would ask you and hope-"
"You still don't know when you're ramblin'?"
"No. BK, I really want you to come wit' me. It wouldn't feel right if you didn't." Desperately, I told her.
"Okay."
"You're gonna come wit' me?"
"I just have to make sure my sister is good. I'll see if she could stay wit' my aunt and uncle."
"Aight, coo." I smiled. "We come back on the third."
"When did you decide to go?"
"A few days after my birthday."
"How'd you get plane tickets so close to the holiday?"
"My Granny knows everybody, so she just worked her magic."
"When you made the decision, were you thinkin' about your mom?"
"How'd you know?"
"I didn't. I asked because I would probably think of my Mom if I were you."
"Yeah, I thought about my Mom when I made the decision. I always think about her."
"What was her name?"
"Gloria."
"That's pretty." I looked past BK to look at the picture of my Mom on my dresser.
"You really do look just like her." BK said.
"Like she just spit me out, right?"
"Literally."
"Even when I had both parents, it was just my Mom. She was there, but my Dad was runnin' the streets for the most part."
"Drugs?"
"Yep. He was in it heavy. I hated it but it paid for my basketball camps and shit."
"Which camp did you go to?"
"I went to Lakers camp when I was five, six, and seven."
"I know you enjoyed that."
"Nah, not really."
"What? Kobe, Fisher and them coachin' you?"
"I wanted my Dad to come. I just wanted him to show up. Ya know? Just be there for the kid. But he didn't." I shrugged. "Other kids had both of their parents their to support them. I had my Mom, she never missed a game."
"When did you start playin'?"
"When I was four. I played for the park. My Mom would always bring juices, gatorade, chips, and stuff for my whole team after the game."
"Soccer mom- well, basketball." She chuckled.
"Yeah, My Mom.. She always showed up.." I looked at BK. "Even now."
"Even now?" BK questioned. She was confused and looked at me for an explanation. I just looked into her eyes. I didn't know how to word what I felt wit'out soundin' crazy.
I still have dreams about my Mom. Dreams of me and her present day, not me as a kid. There always sweet dreams that have some type of meanin'. She always shows up. Some of things BK says, they remind me of my Mom. She says stuff that my Mom used to say. It's crazy to me that BK has no idea of it. What she says just comes natural. I guess that's why my feelings for her so strong. I wanna tell her, but I can't word it right. I don't want her to think that I'm creepy or anything like that.
BK looked in my eyes patiently waitin' for me to speak. I leaned in to kiss her lips. She pressed her lips against mine and we held it. I pulled back but not far away. BK cupped my chin and her finger held my cheek. She pulled me back to kiss me. Continuously, she softly pecked my lips until she stared gigglin'.
"What?" I asked.
"You don't get tired?" She laughed.
"Of what? Kissin' you? Nah, you trippin'." BK kissed my lips once more before she grabbed up her phone. I already knew what she was about to do. Snapchat. I swear she's addicted to that shit. She grabbed my chin and kissed my lips then took a picture. One picture turned into five. Five different picture, five different poses. She told me what to, and I just listened to her. She didn't post them on snapchat. She actually didn't even open snap, which surprised me because snapchat is favorite shit.
BK put her phone down but kept kissin' me. The pecks turned into her pullin' at my bottom lip. When she finally stopped, I pulled at hers. She giggled against me lips and continued to kiss me. I parted her lips wit' my tongue and slipped it into her mouth. I could taste the strawberries on her tongue as it twirled around mine.
"That's what you shoulda put on snapchat." I said. She just giggled and rolled her eyes. We started to actually watch the movie but not for long, though. Durin' the commercial, I turned her face back to mine and we were kissin' again. We barely paid the movie any attention.
"Hey!" Granny called loudly and we jumped back immediately. "What are y'all doin'?"
"Um, nothin'." I said.
"Y'all have got to be tired of kissin'. That's all y'all do. Every five seconds! Y'all swappin' spit! Come eat." Granny shook her head and we got up from the bed and followed her to kitchen. The smell of pasta and garlic bread hit nose as soon as I walked out my room. Ty's greedy ass was already at the table. When we did he even get here? He's been at work all day.
"Sup, ugly cuh." I greeted my boy wit' a handshake.
"What crackin', locc." He banged on me. He was a blood tonight. I banged my uncle's hood and Granny looked at me like she wanted kill me.
"Aye, y'all cut foolishness out." Granny threatened. I stopped right away. I'm not tryna get slapped like the other day. She lowkey snuck me.
"Shawn, if I find out that you're out there hanging with your uncles and their raggedy friends, I'm going to beat-"
"I'm not, Granny." I got away from her. She's not about to hit me. Nah. "I was just playin'."
"Do I look amused?" I didn't even respond. I just made my plate, got some soda, and sat down next to BK. She wanted to laugh so bad, but she didn't because my Granny was still in the kitchen.
After we ate, we moved to the livin' room. The livin' room is where Granny controls the remote. We gotta watch what she wants to watch. It's was all good, because wanted to watched the same channel me and BK were watchin' in my room. We relaxed on the couch. Ty was on the love seat or whatever the fuck it's called. Me and BK took the regular couch. Granny was in her chair.
As usual, BK got sleepy before me. She went into my room to change her clothes and to wrap her hair in that big scarf. I was like "fuck it", I'ma do the same thing. I came back out to livin' room wit' one of them Mexican blankets for me and the shawty. I laid on my back and cover both of our bodies. Bey placed her head on my chest and hugged onto me. We were supposed to open one gift at midnight, but Granny and Bey were rocked way before then. They can't hang wit' the big dogs.
"Grandson." I heard in my sleep. I heard it a few times before I actually woke up. I looked to my left to see BK curled up wit' her back against my side. She was rocked.
"Y'all get up and get my livin' room back in order. Your cousins and them will be here soon."
I yawned and stretched. "Merry Christmas, Granny."
"Merry Christmas, baby. Get up, clean up and breakfast will be ready." Damn. I got a whiff from the kitchen. Smells like potatoes are bacon. Oh yeah, time to get up. I gently shook BK to wake her up. It took longer that I expected but she got up. She folded the blanket while I put the pillows back on the couch. We headed straight to the kitchen and Ty was already there. How does this nigga keep gettin' here before I do?
Granny made bacon, eggs, biscuits and potatoes. It was fire as fuck. But everything my Granny cooks is flame. After we ate, Me, BK, and Ty went to my room to figure out what were gonna wear. I'm not tryna get dressed up like its Easter, but I'm tryna be fitted. It took me a coo minute but I decided to wear black Levi pants, black Trapstar short sleeve shirt, black and white high top shelltoe Adidas. I gotta flex on my cousins, so I gotta wear my gold chain. Mine is real, unlike theirs.
BK kept it plain and simple, but she still looked gorgeous. She wore a fitted white v neck shirt, light blue jeans that she rolled a lil bit and a pair snake print Chuck Taylor's. She curled her hair and stuff, too.
As soon as we were all dressed, one of my cousins came. I introduced him and my aunt and uncle to BK. My aunt Janae, was smiling so hard. She was happy to see that I actually liked someone enough to celebrate the holidays.
"It's so nice to meet you, Beyoncé." Auntie Janae said pullin' away from the hug.
"Nice to meet you, too." BK smiled.
"Yo, cuz." My cousin Damon threw his arm around BK. She looked at me briefly and I just shook my head.
"I meant ask you at Shawn's party." He said. "How much did my cousin pay you to be his girl?"
"Wow, nigga." I said as he laughed wit' BK. "You really tryna play the kid."
Damon laughed. "I'm just sayin', man. How much he pay you?"
"He didn't pay me." BK said gigglin'.
"So you actually like this weird nigga?" Damon frowned.
"Yeah, a lot."
"Aaaw." Auntie Janae said smilin'. "Y'all gon' over there by the tree so I can pictures for my Facebook."
"Mama, don't nobody wanna be on yo Facebook." Damon said but Auntie Janae didn't care. She really made me and BK stand the Christmas and take pictures. The pictures were dope, though. She sent them to me and I sent them to BK. We both posted on the gram, just chose different poses.
"Y'all real life corny." Damon said shakin' his head.
"I'm sayin' man." Ty added.
"Nobody asked you, Tyran." BK rolled her eyes.
"Why you always startin' wit' me, man?" Like any other time, BK and Ty went back and forth.
"Where Granny at?" Damon asked.
"In the kitchen." I told him. "Ask her if we can open gifts." Damon went in the kitchen to talk to Granny but she sent him back a minute later.
"Granny said nobody better touch a gift until everybody get here."
"Can we watch the game?" BK asked. I lowkey almost forgot about all the games that come on today. I grabbed the remote and turned to the game. Heat Vs Thunder. We all sat down on the couch and watched the game. Well, not Auntie Janae, she went in the kitchen to help Granny Cook. It wasn't long because the rest of my family showed up. I introduced everybody to BK and they were all cool. Surprisingly they did attack her wit' a bunch of questions that's really not their business.
"Granny, can we open presents now?" Damon asked.
"Yeah, go ahead." Granny didn't want us lookin all around the tree for our gifts so she just picked up a box and call the name. It was this way every year. She liked it and were used to it.
"BB." Granny called. "These are yours." Bey's eyes popped outta her head when saw that she had two gifts comin' her way. She got up to grab then sat back down on the floor next to me.
"They're all from you." She said.
"I know."
"One is enough." She smiled softly.
"Open." BK picked the slim rectangular box. She probably knows what it is. Gently, she pill the wrappin' paper off. I watched her closely as she ripped the paper. Before she opened the box, she looked at me.
A gold charm bracelet with charms of the things she really loves. Pizza, basketball, money, horses, hearts, shoes, music notes, and a cross. I saved all the money my Granny has been givin' me just to get her these gifts.
"Aaaaaaw, it's so pretty! Thank you so much!"
BK leaped in my arms and hugged me tightly. I smiled and wrapped my arms around her. "I would kiss you but everybody is watchin'." She said into my ear. I looked around and she was right. All eyes were on us.
BK open pulled back and opened the second gift. It was a pair of Jordan's, Maroon 6. She couldn't share excitement because Granny called my name. It was her gift to me. This box is lowkey wide as fuck. I tore the paper off and opened the box.
A white customized Lakers Jersey. Number four wit' my last name on the back. "Ayyyyyeeee! It's lit."
"I would've gotten you two gifts if I knew-"
"It's all good, BK." I quickly kissed her lips.
"Don't y'all start that mess!" Granny warned and me and BK just laughed.
"This is dope. I love it. Thank you." I said to BK then pulled her into a hug.
Once everyone has open their gifts, we picked up the wrappin' paper. We were all ready to eat so moved to the den. Granny prayed, for a long time, but we eventually got to eat. We watched the game in the den because it was more spacious and comfortable than the livin' room.
Bangin' food, my family, and girl. It was a good Christmas.
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