K A S H M E R E
Over the next month August has kept true to his word about coming with me to therapy. I didn't think he was going to talk during our session but he was the one doing the most talking. Of course he had to skate around some stuff but for the most part he was honest. We both recognized that we both let things spiral out of control and the main thing we were tasked to focus on was our communication so that's what we were working on.
I don't know what he was doing when it came to extracurricular activities but not a day went by where I didn't hear from him and not two days went by when I didn't see him. He would call me to check in during the day and show up to my job and take me to lunch or sometimes out to dinner. On the weekends we would set up fun things to do with as a family and at this point I prayed that things stayed the way they were.
It was Friday and I was doing what I did best, dancing. I was teaching my last class of the day and I when we let out I had to go home and get dressed because August was going to meet me at home so we could all go out, dinner and a movie. Kaliyah has been wanting to see the new Disney movie.
Missy Elliot's Work It blasted through the speakers as I moved to the music and watched as all the kids behind me mirrored my moves. These kids had passion and drive and I've been working with most of them for over a year now.
We not only danced but I also taught them about discipline and motivated them in any way that I could. I knew all of them by name and I wanted to say that any of them could talk to me about anything. I didn't just want to be there dancing coach or instructor but I wanted to be someone they could confide in and look up to.
"One last time from the top," I instructed and when the song came on again and I paid closed attention to everyone. It was almost magical how fast these kids picked up each dance move and how each one had there own personal style. They had all kinds of personalities, you had the girly girls and the tomboys to even the class clowns, the so called bad kids, the nerds to the shy and quiet kids. Half of these kids went to several different schools and some even knew each other but when they stepped in here they all put there differences aside and bonded over one of the things they loved most, dancing.
After we finished up I all congratulated them and gave out some high fives and told them Monday they would have to agree on a song. Every other week we would alternate I would pick a song to dance to one week and they would pick a song the next week. The new music out most of them loved but you could never go wrong with Missy Elliot.
Me and Braeden waited with the kids while they gathered all there belongings and walked out and one by own got picked up by there parents or whoever was taking them home. When everyone was gone for the night me and Braeden got ready to lock up.
"So what do you have planned for the night," I asked Braeden.
"Ehh nothing. I plan on going home, taking a shower and ordering some food and catching up on some of my shows before having a wine cooler or two and getting in bed."
"Wow," I smiled, "How the roles have reversed."
"Well I don't have a baby daddy to spoil me and show me off."
I laughed, "August doesn't spoil me."
"Sure he doesn't," he gave me a look, "But I am glad he has been on his best behavior. It wont be long now before you two are back together and wind up pregnant."
At the mention of me being pregnant he immediately started apologizing, "I'm sorry I-"
"It's fine, I'm fine," and I really was, "Me and August are taking things slow. We have-"
I stopped talking when I noticed August standing outside of his truck with a bouquet of roses in his hand.
Standing next to him was Kaliyah who was holding a teddy bear and smiling as wide as her mouth could go.
I walked up looking in between the two of the trying to figure out if I missed something.
"Hey," August flashed me a smile.
"Hi," I smiled back and I was taken back by him leaning in to kiss my cheek and handing me over the roses, "These are for you."
"Thank you."
"It was my idea. Grandma says that when you mess up you have to give the girls flowers and I picked out his bear," Kaliyah held it up, "Because its cute and everyone loves teddy bears."
"It's for me," I asked her and she nodded handing it over to me, "Thank you, I love it."
I hugged my flowers and bear to my chest.
"Isn't this cute, surprising your mommy like this," Braeden gave Kaliyah a hug and said hello to August who said hello back.
"You ready to go to dinner," August asked.
"Yeah but I still have to go home and take a shower and get dressed."
"That's cool, we'll follow you."
"Okay."
"Enjoy your night," Braeden told us saying goodbye to all of us and then he gave me a look and when he hugged me goodbye he whispered in my ear that it would only be a matter of time.
After I rushed home to take a shower and get ready we all hoped in August's truck and headed to dinner. Once our food was brought we started to eat because I was starving but I couldn't help but notice that Kaliyah as usual was eating her chicken strips and french fries with a fork.
For some reason she didn't like using her hands while she ate, she insisted on using a utensil. The chicken strips were big and she tried to cut into them herself but she failed and huffed in frustration. Me and August exchanged smiles.
"You want me to cut it for you," August asked her.
"Yes please," she nodded and I bit my lip to keep from laughing at how adorable she looked. Me and August exchanged a look as he pulled her plate in front of him and started cutting up her chicken tenders for her before sliding the plate back in front of her.
This time she lifted her fork and chewed them with no problem.
"Better," August asked.
"Uh Uh," she nodded and continued to eat humming to herself. Another thing was she always hummed while she ate.
I looked at August and he chuckled under his breathe.
"She get that from you."
I shook my head taking a sip of my water, "I do not hum when I eat."
"You don't?"
"No."
"Okay," he gave me a look before continuing to eat.
After dinner we headed on over to the movie theater and since it was opening night for the movie I had already reserved our tickets. After taking Kaliyah to the bathroom and using it myself we met August in the theater where he was holding our seats.
Once the movie started Kaliyah was so captivated by the movie she wasn't paying attention to anything around her. Every time I looked at August I couldn't help but smile at how bored he looked but like me he would do anything to make Kaliyah happy even sit through a two hour Disney movie.
After the movie August held her hand as we made our way out of the crowded theater as she yapped about how good the movie was. Half the ride home she did the same thing and once we were close to my place I noticed her dozing off and it wasn't long before she was out.
After we got to my place he carried her up and tucked her in and kissed her goodnight. He came out her room and I walked him to the front door.
"You got plans tomorrow," he asked me.
I smiled because I knew where he was going with this, "I was just going to spend the day in."
"So you should spend the day with me, you and Li-Li."
"You know if you want to go out and chill with your friends you can," I assured him, "You spent the past four weekends with us."
"I'm good," he shrugged, "I'd rather spend the day with ya'll anyway."
I smiled at that thinking about how the times have changed. He leaned in and kissed my cheek, "I'll see you tomorrow."
"Text me when you get home please," I opened the door so he could walk out.
"I will, night."
"Goodnight."
I closed and locked the door behind me wondering what he had in store for the both us tomorrow.
A U G U S T
When I woke up I ain't have no real plan in particular but after some quick thinking I had the perfect place for us to go. I called Kash at around ten and told her how would she like coming to the Aquarium and she loved the idea. She told me she wanted to take Kaliyah for about a year now but never got around to it.
After picking them up at around noon we headed out on the hour drive. In the car Kaliyah was sitting in the back playing with her little kiddy tablet while Kash spent most of her time looking out the window.
"So how's Nate," I asked wanting us to talk while we had the opportunity.
She started smiling just hearing her little brother's name.
"He's good. Just started high school. I still can't believe how fast time flies."
"When you plan on going to visit him?"
"Spring break," she smiled, "I was going to let him come down and stay with me for a while but now I'm thinking I should just go down there and spend some time with the both of them. I was going to bring Kaliyah to."
I nodded, I thought it was a good idea for her to get away especially after all the bullshit she's been through. Even though she appeared fine I knew she still wasn't completely over all that happened and I couldn't blame her.
The rest of the ride was pretty much quiet and when we got to the Aquarium, I helped get Kaliyah out.
"This place is where all the fishes and stuff are," she asked curiously.
"Yes," I told her.
"But I thought fishes lived in the ocean," she looked confused and I smiled and so did Kash who decided to answer the question for her.
"Most of them do but some live in here so we can come and visit them and see all the different kind of fish and other animals that live in water."
"Other animals like what," she asked.
"Other animals that you will see when we get inside."
When we got inside she looked at everything like she was amazed. Everything she saw put a smile on her face and was asking a million and one questions. After seeing thousands of different colored fish we headed to look at the penguins and I think she liked that the most.
While Kash and her were gushing over how cute the penguins were I was looking to where to go for the shark tanks. After pulling them along I guided them toward the shark tanks and just walking in Kaliyah gravitated towards me and once she saw the different sharks her eyes popped out her head. Especially when they decided to swim past the glass. Not even Kash would go anywhere near the glass.
I was having a good time, we all were. After seeing all he sharks and taking some more pictures we headed to check out the sea turtles and little tanks with sea horses and shit like that. I ain't realize how much shit there was in the ocean and how deep it was. To think that I was in the water with all that shit made me think twice about going my black ass to the beach.
Last but not least we headed to look at the seal's. One of them was laying down and when it sat up it opened it's mouth up and looked like it was yawning.
"That one looks like ya mama when she wake up in the morning," I told Kaliyah bending down to her level.
When I felt a slap to my head I knew it was none other than Kash and all I could do was laugh while she mugged me.
By the time we left out of there I was starving and it was after five so we drove around until we found somewhere to sit and eat and after that did some walking around and sight seeing.
After that we headed back to our way. We weren't even in the car for ten minutes before Kaliyah was nodding off. Halfway through the ride Kash was out to but I didn't mind.
When we got to her place I carried Kaliyah up and put her to bed and kissed her goodnight and of course turned on her night light and cracked her door.
When I walked in the living room Kash must have been in the bedroom but her purse was on the coffee table. Her phone was sticking out of it and it was going off and I didn't know whether to bring it to her or let it ring but something else in her bag caught my attention.
Forgetting all about the phone I reached in her purse and pulled out the gun she had in there. I had no clue she was carrying a gun around.
"What are you doing?"
I didn't even jump at the sound of her voice.
"You want to tell my why you carrying a gun around in ya purse?"
She walked over reaching to take it out of my hand but I held the gun out of her reach.
"You think it's safe carrying a gun around in ya purse and leaving it just anywhere?"
"The safety is on."
"That's not the point Kash, why you carrying a gun in the first place."
She shrugged like it was no big deal, "For protection."
"I told you it was over, everything is good and I told you I would protect you."
"How can you be so sure," she snapped, "You can't be and I can't depend on you to always be here for me or to protect me so I need to make sure I can protect myself."
I sighed, "Look I know your still hurtin'-"
"I'm fine," she cut me off.
"You carrying guns around with you Kash, that show's me everything ain't fine. The last thing I want you to be doing is carrying around guns on you. What if something happens."
She crossed her arms across her chest, "You carry a gun around on you, so why is it a problem when I carry a gun around. It's legal might I add."
"You know why I carry a gun around. Do you even know how to use it?"
She rolled her eyes, "I told you before I do."
"Look I just don't feel comfortable with you carrying a gun around on you."
She look like she wanted to continue arguing about it but instead sighed, "Fine. I wont carrying it around in my purse. I'll put it back in my safe."
"Thank you."
I sat it down on the coffee table and looked at her, "I know you feel like you need to protect yourself but I got you and no one else will ever get close to you like that again I promise you."
She nodded but didn't say a word.
"Okay?"
She looked me in my eyes, "Okay."
"I love you."
Instead of saying it back she just looked at me, "Even with everything that happened to me?"
I know she was talking about what happened to her. The way she asked me was like I thought she was damaged goods or something.
"I love you before I knew what love really was and I always will, no matter what."
She nodded her head and laid her head on my chest before speaking.
"I love you more."
Hearing her say that was like music to my ears, I kissed her cheek and I held her, neither one of us said a word and I noticed her eyes drifting close. I let her lay there for a while watching her sleep before I decided it would be best to carry her to her bed. Before I could do that though my phone vibrated in my pocket and so I pulled it out trying my best not to wake Kash up. When I noticed who was calling I had no choice but to answer knowing it was important.
"Hello."
"Hey Aug, you busy?"
"Nah, wassup?"
"You wanted me to look in on Jayceon, his crew and his money trail right," he asked.
"Yea, you find anything new?"
"I found out something but I don't know how your going to take it."
I knew whatever he was about to tell me I had to brace myself to for.
"What you find out?"
"A few days before the kidnapping someone deposited 500 g's into that nigga's offshore account. I didn't want to come to you until I knew who it was. It took me a while but I did some digging and came up with a name, an alias Michael Calhoun. I did my research and came up with who the alias belonged to. I didn't want to believe it but the paper trail led me back to another name."
"Okay, who?"
He sighed like he was hesitant to tell me. I was about to tell him to spit it out but he dropped the name before I could.
"Mace, Mason Carter."
After I heard that name I felt like my whole world stopped.
"Hello? Aug, you there?"
"Yea, yo' you sure?"
"Positive. You know I wouldn't come at you with no bullshit."
He was right, he was always thorough with all the information he collected and brought back to me.
"Who else knows?"
"Nobody but me and you now."
"Well just sit on the info. Don't say shit to nobody and I mean nobody."
"You know I wont say a word."
"I appreciate it and lay low for a while aight."
"Okay."
I hung up after telling him bye and sat my phone on the coffee table. My head was spinning from this new info, why would Mace pay Jay 500 g's. It was way to much of a coincidence especially considering a few days later Kash get's taken. I didn't want to jump to conclusions but what else was I supposed to think?
I barely noticed Kash stirring in her sleep until I heard her yawn and sit up and look around before her eyes settled on me.
"Are you okay?"
She was looking at me with a look of concern on her face.
"I'm fine," I lied, "Are you good?"
She nodded smiling up at me.
"What you smiling for?"
"No reason. Are you sure your okay?"
"Of course." I tried to reassure her with a smile but it was hard after the news I just heard.
"It's late, if you don't feel like driving you can stay over, I mean if you want to."
As bad as I wanted to say yes after the shit I heard, if it true then I don't think that was a good idea.
"I want to but I think I should get home," I stood up from the couch.
She nodded her head but I swore she look disappointed on her face, "Okay then, I'll walk you to the door."
She followed me to the door and I turned to look at her.
"Will we see you tomorrow?"
The first time I stayed away to keep her safe and that didn't work out the way I wanted. I don't think I could stay away from her, from Kaliyahthis time around. At least with me around I could protect them.
"Yea we can do something simple, my mom might want to do dinner, if you cool with that."
"That's fine," she shrugged, "So I guess we'll see you tomorrow."
I nodded and pulled her close to me, hugging her goodbye and the hug lasted longer than I intended but neither one of us made a move to pull away. When I did though I kissed her on her forehead.
"Make sure you lock up."
"I will, call me when you get home safe okay."
"I will."
And with that I left. Just as shit was looking up for me, now I had some more shit to deal with.
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