Mom gets home and the first thing I think is "You can't let her see your arm!" Mom would kill me if she found out I cut myself. I run to my closet to try to find a long sleeved shirt. I have two. One is an ugly Christmas sweater grandma bought for me last year for Christmas, actually thinking i'd wear it, and the other is a school shirt from like kindergarten. Too small. I guess i'm left with the ugly grandma sweater. I slip it on, I hope mom doesn't suspect anything.
I unlock my door, i've been hiding in my room sobbing for 7 hours. I feel so useless, so.. dirty I guess you could say. Ryan was my second boyfriend, Elijah was my first.. but you know.. He raped me. I don't even think of him as my ex.. I think of him as a dirty wretched guy that I never want to see or talk to again. He moved away before the school year started. I'm glad he did, if he didn't i'd either be homeschooled or go to school and lock myself in the janitors closet.
The house phone rings and I go to answer it. "Hello?" I say. There is a pause, then the person speaks. "Hi...." It's Ryan. I can't talk to him. I don't want to. "I don't wanna talk to you." I say. "No Charisa, please, just hear me out." I pause so he can blab about how sorry he is, but he really isn't. "Charisa, i'm so sorry. I don't even know what I was thinking. Kelsey stared into my eyes and leaned forward, I didn't wanna be mean and back up, so we.. kissed." he says in a low voice. "Oh, yeah right. That explains why you kept sucking her face and then you put your hand on her butt. Yeah. That's an "accident"." I know that he knows i'm mad. Good. "I just.. I don't know. I really love you Charisa, I really wanted us to work out." "Well you should have thought of that before you went sucking on another girls face." I say, and hang up. I throw the phone and sit down on the couch, staring at the wall.