Thanks to Jenn and to Liliane Grouse for their editing suggestions. Thanks to Days and to CM for pre-reading <3 And thanks to sakshi16 for the banner/cover on the side <333 If you need a book cover, please ask her.
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Chapter Three: Desperate
Abby hurried through the door of Kale & Wells at five past nine on Monday morning. She booted up her computer while noting that even Justin had arrived at work before her. She'd overslept after spending the majority of the night tossing and turning. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so stressed out. Never, she decided. She'd never felt this stressed before.
The rental properties she'd looked at on Saturday had been the worst of the bunch so far. Bad neighbourhoods, broken fences, barking dogs and crazy neighbours had been just the tip of the iceberg. Moreover, house prices were on the up, which meant more people were being forced to rent. Subsequently, owners felt entitled to jack up the amount of rent money they charged. If she could actually find somewhere acceptable to live, she'd struggle to pay the full share by herself.
It had been nine years since her life had been this unstable and unpredictable – nine years since she'd left Tasmania and her troubled mother behind. And it had been even longer since she'd had people she felt she could lean on and share her troubles with. Since she was eighteen she'd relied on and trusted only herself. Now life was unstable once more and she had no one to blame but herself. She had no one to turn to for help, either. No one.
For the first time in a very long time, the fact that she was well and truly alone bothered her. Loneliness had always hovered on the outer edges of her world, but she hadn't paid it any heed until now. Yesterday the feeling of loneliness had been so strong it had made her heart ache. She suspected she was ready to reach out and connect with people again – to build friendships – but she wasn't sure where to start.
And what was she supposed to do about the fact that she needed a friend now? Abby needed someone to care about the issue of her being forced out of her home. She needed advice. She needed someone to tell her she wasn't going to be homeless.
Automatically, her eyes drifted over to where Justin sat frowning at his computer. Sure, he'd told her that she could check out his place if she was desperate, but he'd only said it to be polite. The thought of revealing how desperate she was to Justin D'Marco was...unfathomable. Unfortunately she wasn't sure she had any other choice. Even if he thought her utterly pathetic, he might be able to point her in the direction of someone who needed a housemate. Or he might offer againto show her his place.
On Friday the idea of living with Justin had been unthinkable. But now...Now she was so desperate that she was actually considering it.
He looked up suddenly and caught her staring. She'd hoped that once they were back in the office, she would return to seeing him as her competition, but as his sky-blue eyes caught and held hers, she felt her heart rate double and her face flush. Crap. Blushing because Justin D'Marco looked at her was not a good way to start the day. He was her rival – and a rival she might need a favour from. She did not need to complicate her life anymore by developing some stupid crush on him.
She tore her gaze away from his, put down the pen she'd been holding, and picked up the clean mug she kept on her desk before heading for the kitchen.
She was just pouring herself a coffee when she heard someone walk in behind her. The sweet and spicy scent of Justin's aftershave greeted her before he did.
"Gillis."
She turned around to see him at the sink, filling a water bottle with filtered water.
"D'Marco," she returned.
"You were late this morning."
"I overslept."
"That's unlike you."
He wasn't smirking or making a joke at her expense, and for that she was relieved. She couldn't deal with their usual verbal sparring today.
"Yes, I had a bit of a rough night," she explained.
"How did the house hunting go?" he asked.
"Not too well."
He shut off the tap and looked at her properly. Clearly he was waiting for her to elaborate. She was on the verge of asking him whether she could drop by his place and check it out, as he'd suggested, when she imagined the way he'd look at her when he realized she was asking because she had no one else to help her out. He was going to think she was the most pathetic human being alive.
Come on, Gillis. You have to ask. You don't have anywhere else to go. You have to be out of your unit within a week. You can't afford to be proud right now.
"So what will you do now?" he prompted.
Ask him. You have to ask him.
"I...Could...? Were you serious when you said I could swing by and look at your place?"
The seconds ticked by as he looked at her. She knew he must have wanted to ask her if there wasn't anywhere else she could go, but she pre-empted him by saying, "Justin, I'm desperate."
He was quiet for so long she found herself holding her breath. "Yeah, of course I was serious," he said finally. "You could come by tonight."
Reluctance was etched into his features and it was impossible to miss the way he practically had to force the words past his lips. But it didn't change the fact he'd said them. And in that moment she understood. It didn't matter who was asking Justin D'Marco for a place to stay, he would give them one. He was just that kind of guy. He was never going to turn someone away – not even his rival.
She hated the idea that she might be taking advantage of his good nature, but she needed this.
"Thank you," she said sincerely.
"Don't thank me yet. You might hate the place. And you don't know how much the rent is."
"How much is it?"
He rattled off a figure which was a hefty amount for a half-share, but still less than what she was paying on her own right now. It would also be a lot less than she'd have to pay if she moved into one of the dumps she'd seen on the weekend.
"I can manage that," she told him.
"Great," he said tightly. "I'll email you my address. You can follow me home if you need to."
"Thanks, but I'll probably stay back. You know, to make up for being late this morning."
"Okay, I'll see you sometime this evening then."
She nodded and watched Justin walk out of the kitchen. Undoubtedly, she was the last person Justin wanted to share a house with. They weren't friends. The truce they'd called on Friday was over, and even if they called another one for the next five months – and she had no idea if that was an option for Justin – it wouldn't be easy to live together while they competed with each other.
If she liked the place, however, and Justin agreed to let her move in, she would do her best to be a good housemate. She would endeavour to tidy up after herself. She didn't mind cleaning – when she had the time – and she could cook. She was, in fact, an excellent cook. Maybe she could make it up to him by cooking him meals.
And just how are you going to remember he's your rival when you're making his dinner and blushing whenever he looks at you?
She didn't have the answer to that just yet, but she couldn't afford to dwell on the negatives or challenges of the arrangement. She needed a solution, and right now Justin was it.
***
"You're serious? I can move out?"
Justin shook his head and laughed at his best mate. Tony looked so happy, like he'd just won the lottery. They'd been the best of friends ever since they'd started high school together. Tony'd had a bit of a rough life in places, so it was nice to see he'd found a woman who made him so happy. However, there were times when Tony just seemed so... whipped.
Yeah, and not that long ago you were the man everyone was calling whipped. Admit it, you're jealous Tony's moving in with the love of his life and you have to wait till you move to Sydney.
"So who is he?" Tony asked.
"He who?
"The co-worker saving my ass by moving in with you?"
Justin walked over to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of Coopers Beer, removing the cap with the bottle opener Tony had left out on the bench for him.
"Not he," Justin corrected. "She."
Tony's eyebrows shot up "She?"
Justin nodded.
"Okay then. Who is she?"
"Abby Gillis."
Tony just about choked on his beer. "As in the Abby Gillis? As in the girl who wants the promotion as much as you do?"
"Yup, that Abby Gillis."
Justin had never expected Abby to take him up on the offer he'd thrown out at O'Reilly's on Friday. Sure, he'd gotten along really well with her that night, but the truce they'd called was supposed to be temporary. He needed to keep his eye on the prize and his mind on the game. He'd gotten used to his competitive relationship with Abby and he didn't want their dynamic to change.
He'd walked into work this morning prepared to give his rival plenty of shit, just to remind both of them of how their relationship was supposed to be, but he'd been thrown when he'd realized she wasn't at her desk. Then he'd worried about why she wasn't at her desk. Had she punctured her tyre again? Was she stuck on the side of the road somewhere, needing help?
He'd been ready to try and chase up her mobile number from HR when she'd finally arrived. She'd walked in looking so harried that he'd decided not to give her a hard time. He was already pulling his punches and that was exactly what he'd wanted to avoid. Being competitive with Abby worked for him. He didn't want to be friends with her. It was too late for that. And he definitely didn't want to live with her.
But she was desperate.
The look on her face when she'd told him that had made it impossible for him to rescind the offer. He had an awful suspicion that she'd turned to him because he was the only person who had offered to help her. The thought was more than a little disturbing. Where were her friends? Where was her family?
These questions had nagged at him all day and he'd felt more than a little resentful of the way they'd destroyed his concentration. If Abby didn't have anyone else to help her, that was her problem. If she was alone, it was probably because she'd pushed everyone away. Yet, he hadn't been able to get past the vulnerable expression she'd worn this morning when she'd confessed her situation. Nor had he been able to stop himself from checking her out today.
He'd hoped that seeing her back in her work clothes would erase the memory of her assets from his mind. It hadn't. Whenever she'd gotten up to use the photocopier, he'd been far too distracted by how good she looked bending over in the tailored pants she was wearing. It wasn't exactly a problem he wanted to have when he could wind up living with her.
While his relationship status was still technically 'single', he had no desire to sleep around. Once he and Sarah had started talked about getting back together he'd stopped seeing other people. He had the occasional one-night stand and he knew Sarah did, too, but relationships were out of the question and this attraction to Abby was not welcome. He didn't want to live with someone he was checking out. Damn it, why did Tony have to move out?
There was a loud knock on the front door before Justin heard it swing open.
"Honey, I'm home," Yvette called.
"In here, baby-cakes," Tony yelled.
Justin rolled his eyes at Tony's disgustingly sweet nickname for his girlfriend. Tony and Yvette had been together for two years now. Before they'd met, Yvette had built her own place in Warrandyte. There'd been no talk of marriage yet, but Yvette had been pushing for Tony to move in with her for the past six months, telling him it was pointless to pay rent when he didn't have to. Instead, he could live with Yvette and save up to start his own landscaping company.
Yvette grinned as she waltzed into the kitchen. "Hey J.D."
He gave her long plait a playful tug. "Hey Evie."
"Hey my man," Yvette said to Tony, wrapping her arms around his neck.
Justin looked away as Tony and Yvette stuck their tongues down each other's throats.
"Guess what?" Tony asked, once they'd stopped sucking face. "Justin has someone lined up to move in."
"What?" Yvette yelled excitedly.
"Providing she wants to move in," Justin clarified.
Happiness shone from Yvette's green eyes as she looked at Tony. "Does that mean...? Are you moving in with me?"
Tony grinned. "Yeah baby, I'm moving in."
There was another nauseating moment while Yvette and Tony celebrated the news by kissing each other stupid. Justin didn't dare pop their bubble by reminding them that Abby moving in wasn't a done deal yet.
"So, who is the girl and when do I get to meet her?" Yvette asked after the two of them came up for air.
"Abby Gillis. She's coming over tonight to check the place out."
Was there any chance Abby would look through the place and hate it?
"I'm sure she'll love the place," Yvette said confidently before she turned to Tony. "Babe, what are we having for dinner?"
"Lasagne. You're just in time to help me start."
"Hey, maybe we should make some for Abby, too," Yvette suggested.
Justin shook his head quickly. "You don't need to do that."
He needed to remember Abby was the enemy – something that wouldn't be easy if they shared a meal together...or lived together for that matter.
"Don't be silly," Yvette said. "I want to get to know your new housemate."
"She's not a huge people person," Justin told her.
"She's Justin's arch nemesis," Tony said with a slight smirk.
Yvette's expression turned unmistakably mischievous. "You have a nemesis?"
"Whatever you're thinking, Yvette, no," Justin warned. "No dinner. She's staying back at work tonight, anyway."
"Well then she'll be hungry," Yvette argued. "We have to offer her dinner at the very least."
"She wouldn't be interested."
Abby hated socializing, and right now he was really grateful for that. If she did end up living there, she'd be too busy working to get in his way. They could keep their distance. She certainly wasn't going to agree to stay for dinner.
"So, you don't mind if we ask her?" Yvette asked.
"I know what she'll say, but don't let that stop you."
"I won't," Yvette said sweetly.
***
It was after seven-thirty when Abby finally pulled up outside Justin's place. She immediately cast her gaze over the large dwelling he rented. The house looked as well maintained as the other residences in the street. She liked that. She also liked the fact that she couldn't hear any barking dogs. No one was making noise outside with air compressors and the likes. And no crazy neighbours were standing out on the street swearing at each other.
Taking in a deep breath, she opened the car door and stepped out, careful to lock it before she started walking along the path which led from the street to the house. When Abby heard a woman's laughter coming from inside, however, nerves caused her to slow her steps. The only people she met these days were new clients. She hadn't thought about the fact that Justin might be entertaining tonight.
He could be on a date.
The thought stopped her dead in her tracks for a moment before common sense kicked in. Justin knew she was coming and he would have told her not to swing by tonight if he'd been busy. She swallowed and continued walking forward, despite the fact that every cell in her body was telling her she shouldn't have come – that there had to be someone else she could turn to, surely.
But there isn't, is there? You've deliberately avoided making friends with people because you thought it was a waste of time after what happened with Candace and the girls at Beaumont High. You thought life would be better and less troublesome if you went it alone. But you were wrong. If Justin won't help, you're absolutely screwed.
Summoning up all of her courage, she knocked on his front door and prayed this visit worked out. Nerves made her stomach flutter and she was so busy paying attention to the feeling that she actually jumped when Justin pulled the door open.
"Gillis."
Obviously they had the heating on inside because she could feel the warm air rush out to meet her. Moreover, Justin was standing there in the doorway wearing a dark grey T-shirt and a pair of shorts, as if it was summer instead of the end of winter. She'd never seen him out of his work clothes before. This casual look should have made him seem more approachable. It didn't. Standing directly in front of him, she could see just how well-built he was. She'd actually started counting all the muscles she could see under his shirt before she stopped herself and forced her gaze upwards.
"Hi," she said, after she'd unglued her tongue from the roof of her mouth.
"I wasn't expecting you until later."
Wow. Could he make it any more obvious he doesn't want you here? God, this is humiliating.
She swallowed. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt. I can come back later. Or I can disappear completely if you've changed your mind about showing me the room."
She hoped he missed the slight waver in her voice. She didn't need him to see how afraid – how utterly vulnerable – she felt now that she thought he might be about to retract his offer.
He leaned on the doorframe. "I haven't changed my mind. I just didn't think you'd be here so early. We're about to have dinner."
"Oh. Well, please don't let me keep you. Just show me where to sit and I'll wait for you to finish."
"Don't be silly," a voice called from down the hall.
Justin was joined in the doorway by a stunning looking woman with sleek, long, brown hair pulled into a plait. Abby guessed her age to be somewhere around the same as Justin's: twenty-eight or twenty-nine.
She smiled at Abby, before glaring at Justin and giving him a push out of the doorway. "How long are you planning on keeping her out there?" The woman waved her in.
Her smile was extremely warm as Abby walked into the house.
"I'm Yvette," she said. "We're having lasagne for dinner. Would you like to join us?"
Abby's gaze flew to Justin, who seemed completely nonplussed by the idea. He probably thought she was going to gate crash his dinner with his girlfriend
"Oh, no. I couldn't," Abby replied as politely as she could.
"Why not? Tony and I made enough for everyone."
"Tony?"
"My boyfriend and Justin's current housemate, or, brother from another mother to hear them tell it," Yvette said with a laugh. "We figured you'd be hungry if you've been working late."
So, Yvette wasn't Justin's girlfriend. Relief that she hadn't interrupted him having dinner with his significant other was replaced by disquiet as she contemplated the fact that Justin was a healthy, good looking guy in his twenties and, if he didn't already have a girlfriend, he was sure to have female company over at some point. What was she supposed to do when he did? She'd have to make herself scarce.
"Have you already eaten?" Yvette asked.
"No. But it wasn't my intention to turn up during dinner."
"Don't worry about it. We set a place for you and everything."
She couldn't keep the surprise out of her voice as she asked, "Really?"
She was slightly confused as to why Tony and Yvette would make enough food to include her. Maybe they believed she was Justin's friend – a logical conclusion since Abby was considering moving in with him. But Justin was merely doing her a favour by agreeing to show her his place. And right now he really didn't look happy about the fact that dinner was on offer. She had to say no.
"Thanks, but I'm fine. I already have dinner planned. Maybe another time?"
Yvette looked a little crushed. Abby felt crushed, too. Dinner smelled fantastic and Yvette seemed so nice. Abby couldn't remember the last time she'd met someone and instantly felt so comfortable with them. Earlier today she'd been thinking about reaching out – about trying to connect with people. Here was the perfect opportunity to do that and she was knocking it back.
"Well, at least come and sit with us at the table while we eat."
Abby didn't miss the fact that Justin was now glaring at Yvette, but after turning down the food, Abby didn't feel like she could say no to sitting at the table.
Warily dismissing Justin's unhappy expression, she followed Yvette down a long hallway, admiring the polished floorboards as she did so. The hallway led into a large kitchen and Abby couldn't stop the little noise of approval from escaping as she took in the plentiful bench space and modern appliances.
"Hi, I'm Tony."
Abby wrenched her gaze away from the Miele oven and looked into a pair of warm brown eyes. She shook the hand of Justin's 'brother from another mother', his smile just as warm as Yvette's had been. His dark hair looked a little out of control, but he was definitely easy on the eyes.
"Ah, I overheard your conversation." Tony's expression was sheepish. "But I'd already served you something."
Her attention was immediately drawn to where four plates of steaming lasagne sat on a large dining table.
"I hope you don't mind," he said.
To her complete mortification her stomach picked that time to make itself heard by everyone.
"We'll take that as a no," Yvette laughed.
"You're obviously starving," Tony said. "I'm going to have to insist you eat with us now."
"Have whatever you were going to cook tonight tomorrow," Yvette said.
Abby sighed. "I was just going to re-heat something in the microwave."
Tony stared at her. "Are you seriously telling me you were going to turn down my world class lasagne for something you heated up in the microwave? I'm truly offended."
Mortification stole through her. "I'm sorry."
"He's joking, Abby," Justin said gently.
Sure enough, there was a teasing glint in Tony's eyes when she looked back at him. Yvette and Justin looked amused, too. It had been a long time since she'd been subject of so much friendly attention in a social situation and she found herself blushing.
"I wasn't joking about my lasagne being world class though. The only thing that could improve it slightly is the accompaniment of the perfect wine. Can I tempt you with a glass of red?"
She rarely drank alcohol, but if she had a glass it might help ease the nerves fluttering in her stomach. This dinner suddenly felt too important. Justin was always going to be her rival because of the promotion. Nothing would change that. But she liked his friends. So far she liked his house. And she liked him. He was one of the good guys and she didn't want him to dread having to live with her. Maybe, if tonight went well, he wouldn't.
She smiled at Tony. "I'd love a glass, thank you."
Justin looked more resigned than anything as they took their seats around the table. She sat down opposite him while Yvette sat opposite Tony. The light over the dining table had been turned down, providing a soft glow.
Tony poured them all a glass of wine and then raised his. "To finally meeting Justin's arch nemesis."
Abby would have choked on her wine if she'd actually taken a sip. Her eyes flew to Justin, but he just rolled his eyes and shook his head. Exactly what had Justin told his friends about her?
Oh God. What if Justin had told them that she was so desperate and hard up for a place to live that she had no one else to turn to but him? Maybe they'd asked her to stay for dinner because they pitied her. The thought made her stomach churn.
"I've always wanted to meet the woman who gives Justin a run for his money," Tony told her, winking.
She searched his eyes, looking for pity, but she didn't see anything but warmth.
"Tony has always had a flair for the dramatic," Justin said drily.
She took a sip of her wine and reminded herself she'd been defensive and stand-offish the entire time Justin had known her. He was entitled to say what he wanted about her. He, more than anyone, had tried to break through her defences. He'd persisted in being friendly until she'd finally worn him down and he'd given up on her. She regretted that now. She wanted to change. She was ready to change. Hopefully Justin would see that tonight.
She raised an eyebrow at Justin. "Arch nemesis?"
"I don't think I ever used those exact words." There was a hint of amusement in his voice and a small smile playing around his lips before he clinked his glass against hers. "Cheers, Gillis."
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