I stepped inside Charly's house with a spare key she got done for me. I had to come and return the dummy that fell into my bag and help sort out these nappies she couldn't find. When I walked in, Kate was crying and Charly was walking around trying to get her to stop.
"Thank goodness" I sighed and handed her the dummy I placed in my pocket before leaving. She placed it in Kate's mouth, but she wouldn't take it.
"Have you tried feeding her?" she scowled.
"Why didn't I think of that? I have tried everything" I ran a hand through my hair.
"Sorry. Want me to take her?" I got handed my daughter, I slowly rocked her.
"I really do appreciate you coming. You weren't busy were you?" I was. But I couldn't bring myself to tell her I was in the middle of something. "Louis?"
"Hmm?" I looked at her, still keeping Kate moving in my arms, finally settling down once again.
"Were you busy?" I looked away again. "Louis! You promised me you wouldn't put us first all the time. You need to spend time with Niall. Alone"
"We were having alone time" I mumbled. I rubbed Kate's cheek with the back of my finger.
"Louis. This is already hard on Niall, you can't make it any harder by cancelling plans. What were you two doing?"
I ignored the question and sat down on her couch. I just looked at my daughter, cooing at her. Charly didn't stop staring though. I could feel her eyes boring into my body.
"Okay" I couldn't handle her intense stare. "We were, y'know... Doing it" her eyes widened and she walked up to me and hit me over the head. "Ow"
"That's for being an idiot" I rubbed the back of my head. "You were in the middle of sex! Why did you answer the phone? How did you even stop?" my face heated up, this was not a conversation to really talk about.
"Well... We hadn't actually started. He was in me but not going" this was embarrassing.
"You are an idiot. Go back home" she ordered taking Kate out of my hands. "Go, and don't come back for a week, at least"
"But-" she shook her head.
"No buts. I will turn you away if you come to my door" I sighed and nodded. There was nothing I could do or say to get her to say anything else. But I guess she was right. I needed time with Niall. The two of us.
"Okay. But if you do need anything, call me" she agreed, but I had a feeling she wasn't going to be calling me about anything for a week.
I left her house and headed back to our dorm. Thoughts roaming my brain of what we could do with each other flooded me. Making out, talking, looking for houses, sex. It has been too long since we've had sex. Today didn't count, we didn't really have sex and I was kicking myself for it. I would have to make it up to him some how.
The whole walk back to our room I was going over what I could do to make it up to him. Take him out? Give him head? Cuddle and watch movies? Possibilities were endless and whatever he wanted to do I would do. Because I love him
"Hey, sorry I took so long I had a little chat with Charly" I announced as I stepped in the room. The first thing I noticed was Niall sitting on the bed, head down in fresh clothes and damp hair. The second thing was an over night bag. "What's going on?" Niall looked up at me. His face broken.
His blue eyes were red and teary and his lips quivered. My heart raced in my chest. What was happening? Part of me had a speculation of what was to come, I pushed it aside because it couldn't be true.
"Louis..." he breathed out. In that sad tone. The tone that means bad news. I knew it all too well. My heart continued to hammer in my chest. "We need to talk"
That was never good. Those words were always a bad sign. My speculations seemed to be coming true and I didn't want this at all. I walked over to him and sat on the opposite side of his bag. I couldn't let this affect me just yet. Maybe it was something else and not what was going through my mind.
"What's going on Ni?" I tried to ask calmly. I exhaled a deep breath. Another sign of something not good. All these things were leading up to the bombshell I was dreading to hear.
"Louis" his voice already broke, he took my hands in his and held them in my lap. "Louis, this is very hard for me, don't think for a second I'm taking this lightly. Because I'm not"
My throat became dry and my heart pounded louder.
"Louis... I-I can't do this anymore" he was choking on his words and a lump formed in mine. "I-I'm breaking up with you, and I'm leaving tonight"
"No, no Niall please. I'm sorry for what happened this afternoon" I pleaded. My vision became blurry.
"It's not just today, Lou" he told me softly, sniffling away some tears. "Louis, our relationship has been a whirlwind, a wonderful one, and I don't regret it. I love you, I really do. But, I need some time for me"
I could sense that's what this was immediately, a break up. I couldn't believe it though. He was breaking up with me. It was my fault I knew it was. The whole 'me time' thing was an excuse to try and make the other person feel better. But it doesn't when you know the tricks.
"Niall, I said I'm sorry. You won't have to worry about me going off to her all the time. I promise, you and me, okay?" he just shook his head as tears rolled down his beautiful face.
"Louis, it isn't just about the baby, or Charly" he lightly squeezed my hands. "I need time for myself. I need to be alone as I step into this new world, I need to explore with other men, I've only been with two men, Lou, I need to experiment" I shook my head, allowing my tears to fall down my face, I refused to let go of his hands so soon to wipe them though.
"Is that what it is? The sex? God, I'll let you sleep with whoever whenever for however long. Please, don't leave me" the look on his face broke me to pieces.
"Louis, understand me please. I love you so damn much, okay? But I need to go off, explore on my own, work on my career, find myself. You have your own career to focus on, you have a family"
"You're part of that Niall" I added. "You are just as part of my family as Charly and Kate are. You have to understand that" I removed my hands from his and grabbed his face, making him look at me. "You mean the world to me Niall, you are my other half. I don't care that I'm only 19, I know that this is love. You're meant for me"
Niall's hands covered mine on his face and slowly pulled them off, back into my lap. I couldn't believe it was still happening. He was still going to leave me.
"God Lou. You make this so hard for me" he took a deep breath. "I have been contemplating this decision for months. Since the halfway point of Charly's pregnancy, when you started paying more attention, I started to feel a drift, started to think about us. I knew things weren't going well"
"Why didn't you tell me?" he ignored my question.
"As it got closer, and then the death of my grandma, and you having to leave for the birth, I was 99% sure of what I had to do, today was that last one percent Lou" I shook my head.
"Niall, please. I'll turn my phone off. No one will be able to contact me. Please don't leave me"
"I'm sorry. I can't stay any longer, I'm going back home until I can get my own place" he stood up. "I love you Louis, never forget that, okay? I will always love you" he leaned down and kissed softly. I tried to make it last as long as I could. I wanted to feel his lips on mine for as long as possible. "Goodbye" he whispered over my lips.
I vaguely saw him picking up his bag and walking out the room. I felt empty, my heart stopped thumping against my chest and dropped. I thought it stopped altogether. But if it did, then I wouldn't be feeling this pain throughout my body.
It took a moment to realise what had actually happened. That he left me, for a second time. Although, this time was a much nicer breakup than the last. A kiss was better than a punch any day. But it wouldn't be a breakup without a punch. The pain of a breakup ran through my body, tears blurred my vision and I couldn't stop myself being so mad at my stupidity. I stood up and walked to the nearest wall, throwing my fist toward it. Being dry wall, it went though and left an ache in my hand and a hole in the wall, just like the one in my heart.
"Why!" I screamed. I fell to a heap on the floor. It was cold and hard, but I couldn't bring myself to care. All I wanted was Niall to be back, holding me in his warm arms, kissing me and telling me how much he loves me.
It still didn't make sense. If he loved me, why would he leave me? Did I really hurt him that bad he felt it was best to leave? What could I have done differently?
Time went by. I don't know if it was hours or minutes. It was a blur, time was non-existent at this point of time. Even the sound of a door couldn't bring me to my senses. My name was faintly heard by a voice that was definitely not Niall's. I would know if it was his.
A hand rested on my arm and lightly shook me. I stared blankly ahead. His voice sounded again, talking to another person. I soon felt warmth consume my body, a blanket was placed over me, but no one took the step to move me.
"Louis?" his voice was stern. "Louis, what's wrong?" it got louder, I just blinked, searching for the brain activity to let the words to leave my mouth.
"He left me" I still couldn't place who these people were, but they were obviously close to me.
"What are you talking about?"
"Niall left me" I sobbed. Tears were still flooding down my face. I couldn't stop them. "He said he loved me but he left me" Mumbles were exchanged by the people in the room.
"Alright. Let's get you in bed" I was picked up, his arms were strong. Stronger than Niall's but his were close. Not as firm. He walked me to the bed and laid me down on the comfort of a mattress. My head sat on a pillow and I continued to stare off blankly. This was the worst day of my life. "Lou. It's Liam, do you want me to call anyone?" I nodded. The only one I could stay with until I could pick myself up. The best place for me right now.
"Charly. Call Charly"
He did. I saw him pick up my phone and search her name, explaining in the brief detail I gave them what happened. After that, they stayed with me. Making sure I was okay. I don't think I ever would be. He meant the world to me and now, he was gone from my life, just like last year. Gone. One day, one day I hope I will return to his arms and call him mine again.
A/N well it seems Niall has gone. I have 1 chapter and the Epilogue left before some Bonus Chapters I felt like writing cause I was bored.