I sat in my seat in pure awe. I never saw Hakeem as the type to play girls. How could he lead Tasneem on for this long? I grabbed my purse and stormed out of the auditorium into a hallway and sat on a bench. I took out my phone, still no text from Fuad. It was already 8:00, I clicked on his contact name and called him hoping that he would pick up. It rang and on the last ring somebody finally answered.
"Hello?" It was a girl's voice.
"Hello, who's this?" I asked.
"You called this phone so shouldn't I be asking you that?"
"Where's Fuad?"
"He went to the bathroom. But I can tell him that you called when he gets back."
"Tell him Warsan called."
"Oh so you're his little girlfriend huh?"
"What did he tell you?"
"He never told me anything I just heard him on the phone with you at night a few times." Who was this girl and why was she in Fuad's room at night?
"Where are you guys at right now?" I asked.
"We're at a hookah spot. I gotta go now it was nice talking to you 'princess'." The line went dead. What was Fuad doing at a hookah spot and who was this girl he was spending so much time with? This whole time Fuad has been telling me that he was busy when he's really just been going to hookah spots and spending time with girls. My heart filled with rage and my eyes filled with tears, I was tired and full of frustration. I noticed a shadow behind me and turned around. Hakeem was looking dead at me.
"Are you crying?" he asked concerned.
"No, don't talk to me." I wiped my eyes and turned away.
"People are going to start coming out and I don't want them to see you cry. Come to the car with me."
"No."
"You're going to have to get in the car with me anyway. I'm your ride home." I really didn't want all of these people to see me cry. I hated crying. I grabbed my purse and trailed behind Hakeem. He unlocked the car and I got into the passenger's seat.
"I'm mad at you." I said without looking at him.
"Can you tell me why?"
"You lead my best friend on, asked her out, and then wrote a poem and dedicated it to another girl. Do you know how dumb that makes you look Hakeem? I really didn't see you as somebody to do that." He looked at me in confusion and his face broke out in a smile.
"Warsan, I'm not dating Tasneem." he laughed.
"What are you talking about?" I asked. Now I was the confused one.
"What made you think that I was dating Tasneem?"
"She told me that you asked her out."
"I never asked her out. Tasneem tends to jump to conclusions and as her best friend you should know that. I clearly told her that I liked her as a friend. She asked me if we could go out sometime and I said sure. She must have took it the wrong way."
"I don't believe you."
"I have proof." He took out his phone and showed me their conversation from yesterday. It consisted of her asking him if he liked her or hated her. And then asking if they could go out to eat sometime. Tasneem should really start being more clear.
"But Ahmed told me that you guys are dating."
"She probably told Ahmed that, not me." he said putting his hands up. "Tasneem is a really cool girl but I'm not into her like that, I like her as a friend." He leaned back in his seat.
"Why did you lead her on for so long?" I asked.
"I really didn't. I treated her like I treat all of my other female friends."
"Well it's your loss. Tasneem deserves the best and I guess you aren't."
"I agree, Tasneem deserves a great guy. But I'm not that guy. Me and her just don't match."
I threw my head back. How was I going to explain to Tas that her and Hakeem weren't dating? Then I came to a realization.
"Why did you say that you didn't want Tasneem to come because she would make you nervous if you didn't have feelings for her?" I asked angrily.
"I knew she was into me and if she heard my poem and found out it wasn't about her..it would hurt her. I might not have feelings for Tasneem but I still care about her."
"Hakeem you really messed up."
"How?" he asked.
"You let it get this far. Now you have to clear it up."
"Can't you talk to her for me?" he asked.
"Nope, this is between you two. I'm not going to be the person that delivers the news of her first heartbreak."
"Okay, I'll talk to her." he sighed. "But I know you weren't crying because you thought I hurt Tasneem. What's going on Warsan?"
"I don't want to talk about it." I turned away and looked out of the window.
"Come on Warsan. You can trust me. We're friends and you can tell me."
I didn't answer.
"What kind of friends are we if we can't open up to each other?"
I still didn't answer.
"Warsan, look at me." he said in a kind voice that made me turn around. My eyes were filled with tears, I didn't know where to begin.
"Is this about your dad?" he asked.
"Kind of."
"What else?"
"I miss how things used to be. I miss my dad, I miss my house, I miss how I felt before I knew all of these family secrets, I miss how I never had to worry about Fuad..."
"Fuad?" he interrupted.
"My boyfriend."
"What's wrong with him?"
"Nothing I just feel like he's so different now that he's gone. He's not the same Fuad. He's smoking, he's out with girls, and he never has time for me anymore." I said as tears streamed down my face.
"We make time for the things that we want." he said. I looked at him angrily.
"Are you saying he doesn't want me?" I asked accusingly.
"He would be an idiot if he didn't." He looked me dead in the eye. I looked away. "Sometimes we fall in love and the the person we fall in love with changes. If being with him hurts to the point that it's making you like this instead of making you feel good, then maybe it's time to let go."
"You don't even know him!"
"You're right, I don't. But anybody with eyes can see that this relationship is doing you more bad than good."
"You are really one to talk Hakeem. You just read a poem about your ex in front of your whole school."
"What are you talking about?" he asked.
"I'm not dumb. The poem you performed was for your ex Naima."
"Naima? Who told you that?"
"Ahmed."
"Ahmed needs to stop talking." he said as he covered his face. "No, the poem was not about Naima. I stopped caring about her a long time ago." He sounded frustrated.
"I don't understand."
"The poem was about you, Warsan."
My eyed widened. "It's about who?"
"You. I've liked you since the day that I met you but you had a boyfriend and I knew you would never go for me because Tasneem liked me."
"Why didn't you say something?"
"I don't take rejection well and I also told you before that I respect relationships."
"What kind of respect is this? You dedicated a whole love poem to me!"
"My poetry is where I express the things that I can't, or shouldn't, say out loud. But when I went up there I saw you in the audience and I couldn't control myself."
"Hakeem.."
"Warsan, how do you feel about me?"
"I have a boyfriend."
"And if you didn't?"
"My best friend likes you."
"And if she didn't?"
"It wouldn't matter."
"It matters to me." he said seriously. "I can't remember the last time I felt this way about a girl. It sounds clichè but it's the honest to God truth. You don't deserve a guy that has you constantly wondering where you stand with him. I don't think you see how kind and smart and beautiful you are. You are so selfless, I can see it in the way you look out for Tasneem. You are hands down the nicest person that I have ever met. Why are you settling for somebody that doesn't treat you as special as you are? I'm not telling you to leave him and come to me. I'm telling you, as your friend and somebody that cares about you, that you should know your worth."
In that moment, I don't know what got into me. Those are the kinds of poetic words that I had hoped Fuad would say to me. I looked over at Hakeem and he was staring at me, waiting for me to say something. Instead of using words, I leaned in and kissed him. That was the only time that I had kissed a guy that wasn't Fuad. He kissed back and kept going until I felt eyes staring at us. I eventually pulled away and sat back in my seat. Ahmed and Naima were standing in front of the car, watching everything unfold.