LUCY
"Wala pa sa kalahati ng baso ang alam mo Lucy. You are bound to be here, you planned this, we planned this. I know about your plan but I'm not gonna tell you. You'll gonna find it along the way."
"You purposely forget everything to lure them, naka pabor na satin ang lahat."
"Can you just give me a clue?" I asked pero umiling siya.
"Alam mo ang lahat, it's in the deepest part of your soul. It will be out when the right time comes."
"What if I'll go against the plan?"
She let out a laugh.
"Can you though? The pain they inflicted is too deep, his betrayal ruined you, their baseless accusations, fingers pointing at you. They shamed you, iniputan ka nila. Ginawa mo ang lahat pero ano ang binalik nila sayo? You're the hero yet they made you the villain. Now be the villain."
Napahinto ako sa paglalakad nang maramdaman ko ang pag dausdos ng luha sa pisngi ko. All I can hear was her anger and pain. Her words are like a dagger to me, I can feel her anger ang pain. Even remembering her words now, I can still fell the whirlwind emotions. Anger, hatred, pain, betrayal. I don't know why I'm feeling this. I'm lost with my own emotions.
"The cut is too deep Lucy. We suffered enough."
Huminga ako ng malalim nang maalala ko na naman ang mga sinabi niya. I swallowed the lump in my throat as I suppressed a sob. I wiped the tears on my face.
"You maybe forgot everything, but all the pain remains, the anger and hatred remains, all of those are buried deep down."
"We will end up rotting because of this anger."
Isang ngiti ang sinukli niya sa sinabi ko. Isang ngiting puno ng lungkot.
"But we will end up rotting doing everything we can." saad niya.
"We will all rot in the deepest pit of hell."
Tumawa lang siya sa sinabi ko. "It's our hometown Lucy."
I inhaled sharply as I took a step again as I walked towards the cctv room. Ang isip ko ay bumabalik sa nagpagusapan namin kanina ng replay ko. Those words, emotions are just... surprisingly unbelievable. I never imagine myself like that. Full of anger and determination.
"I was six years old when I created you... ibig sabihin may iba pa akong buhay bago to?"
Muli siyang ngumiti.
"Baby steps Lucy, baby steps. For now, live your life first. Live the life that we always wanted. Sakyan mo lang ang mga pangyayari, follow the trail. Don't worry about the plan at gawin mo ang kailangang gawin, that bastard will do the rest."
"Who are you pertaining to?"
"Someone that you haven't met."
"You're gonna meet him along the way, hayaan mo muna siya. He's fucked up right now. Dapat sinunod na nalang niya ang sinabi ko sa kanya but he didn't, he let his emotions meddled and now he's fucked." natatawang saad niya habang ngumunguya ng tsokolate. Tila nasisiyahan siya sa nangyayari roon sa taong tinutukoy niya pero agad itong nabura at napalitan ng inis.
Nilingon niya ako ng punong-puno ng inis.
Her emotions change quickly.
"We are fucked." nariin niyang saad sabay padabog na kumagat ng tsokolate. "Nag seize the moment din ang gago. Di talaga marunong tumupad sa usapan."
Iwinaksi ko na ang memorya sa nangyari kanina sa kusina. The emotions that I'm feeling won't do me anything good, her confusing words won't help me. I should focus on what's happening right now. My plate is full enough to add more dish.
"That Yurika you've just talk is an impostor, they replaced her with an impostor."
Kinandado ko muna ang pintuan pagkapasok ko sa loob bago binuksan ang mga malalaking screen na kitang-kita ang mga sulok ng bahay. Naglagay ng maraming cctv sila mommy dati after the fire incident when I was 12 years old, months before their accident.
I checked all the cctv footage na nakuhanan nang makarating na kami.
I wish I have someone who can do flashbacks para mas mapadali ang lahat. It's the easiest way to capture all the snakes and put them in the sack.
Mula sa screen ay nakita ko si Yurika na papalabas sa cr sa may second floor, naglakad siya pababa sa first floor at dumeretso sa kusina. She's not doing anything suspicious, kumuha lang siya ng tubig sa ref at uminom. She looked so dehydrated as fuck.
Napatingin ako sa oras kung kailan nakunan ang video. 12:01 am. She's done shitting at 12:01 but she knocked at my door around 12:25 am nanghihingi ng alcohol, meaning kakatapos niya lang maglabas ng sama ng loob.
Ano yun almost half an hour siya tumae? Ano nilabas niya? Puno ng saging?
Nanatili lang ang mga mata ko sa screen at pinapanood ang galaw ni Yurika. This is the real one, I'm sure of that.
Napakunot ang noo ko nang makita kong nagtataka siyang lumingon sa may backdoor ng kusina, mukhang papalabas na sana siya nang huminto siya sa paglalakad. Kitang-kita sa screen ang pagtataka sa mukha niya, I can't hear anything because the cctv doesn't have an audio.
Nakatuon lang ang buong atensyon ko kay Yurika na naglalakad papalapit sa backdoor. Dahan-dahan siyang naglalakad na parang may pinapakinggan.
May narinig siyang di niya dapat marinig... Now she's in danger.
"Why are they after you? May ginawa ka bang kasalanan sa kanila?"
Mabilis akong napalingon sa buong paligid nang makarinig ako ng dalawang boses ng bata. Saan galing yun?
"No. Sila ang may kasalanan sakin."
Boses ng batang babae at lalaki. The hell ako lang ang mag isa rito.
"Anong ginawa nila sayo?"
"What happens to me has nothing to do with you so stay out of it."
Mariin akong napapakit nang unti-unting mag echo sa pandinig ko ang boses ng dalawang bata. Their voices are ringing to my ears. Their familiar voices sent shivers to me. I felt like I've heard it before, but when? Where?
"I'm just asking Lucy. Nothing to fuss about so calm down."
"You should not cross the thin line next time."
"What line? Labas nga ba talaga ako sa nangyari sayo? Am I really out of it? Or you're just kicking me out to what happened centuries ago?"
"Oh..."
Napatakip na ako sa tainga ko nang umalingawngaw ang mahinang tawa ng batang babae, ang mahinang tawa ay nauwi sa halakhak. Series of images flashes on my mind that made my head ache.
"What are you doing here? Following me? Dapat nagpaiwan ka nalang."
Images became clear, I saw two children inside the library, standing facing each other. Lahat malinaw maliban sa mukha ng dalawang bata. I can't see their faces clearly.
Why am I seeing this?
Mariin akong napapikit nang lalong sumakit ang ulo ko.
"Dropping your position and power... is this worth it? Am I worthy of your sacrifices?"
Her tiny voice was mocking.
"Oh wait, are you here to stop me? Well news flash babe, you can't. I won't let you. I'm already half way of my plan, the exciting part is about to start."
"I'm here to help you. I'm helping you." Mapangngutyang tumawa ang batang babae.
"Guilty aren't we?"
"Pagkatapos mong isigaw sakin lahat ng ginawa ko? Isampal sa mukha ko lahat ng kasalanan ko? Now you're telling me that you're here to help me?"
"Wag na tayong maglokohan dito Lucy you are aware of me helping you simula pa lang ng plano mo."
"Edi putangina bakit ka magagalit sakin gayong tinutulungan mo rin naman ako? Gulo mo ah! Magagalit ka kasi ginagawa ko to tapos ngayon tinutulungan mo pala ako?! Gago ka pala eh."
"Kasi hindi kita maintindihan kung bakit mo to ginagawa!"
"Hindi rin kita maintindihan!"
Gulong-gulo ako sa mga nangyayari, sa mga nakikita ko. Everything seems familiar. Yung batang babae... yung batang lalaki, yung mga boses nila.
Nakasandal na ako sa pader habang nakayukyok hawak-hawak ang ulo. The pain is not helping me. I want to shout. I keep hearing their voices, their shouts. Hindi nalang boses ngd alawang bata ang naririnig ko kundi boses galing sa iba't ibang tao.
All of them are shouting, the images of the two kids are now gone and all I see is pitch black and all I can hear are voices from the angry people shouting.
Palakas ng palakas ang mga sigaw nila at pasakit ng pasakit ang ulo ko habang unti-unti ko na ring naramdaman ang sakit ng tainga ko. Their shouts pained me physically and somehow, emotionally.
"Kill her!"
"What a disgrace!"
"Sunugin ang babaeng yan!"
"Pinatay niya ang mahal na Dyosa! Patayin ang babaeng yan!"
"She doesn't belong here!"
"Chained her! Punish her!"
"Huwag dito yan patayin! This is a sacred place!"
"Trydor!"
"Murderer!"
"Hang her!"
"Stop, stop, stop, stop."
I pleaded as I continue to hear their angry shouts. Ramdam ko ng nababasa na ang pisngi ko dahil sa luha. I cried and pleaded stop but the voices are still ringing in my ear.
Are those words for me? Why am I hearing this and feeling this pain? Why am I hearing this?
Marahas akong napasabunot sa buhok ko, trying to divert my pain. Trying to divert this unbearable pain inflicted by their words.
I'm not a murderer nor a traitor.
Where are the shouts coming from? Bakit ganito ang epekto sakin? It's giving me unbearable pain, physically and emotionally.
I'm confused.
What is happening? I want this to stop. I want them to stop, I want the voices to stop.
It looks like the heaven listen to my pleads. Unti-unting naglaho ang mga boses hanggang sa ang nakakabinging katahimikan at ang mahinang hikbi ko nalang ang marinig ko. I sob and sob, I let the tears coming out from my eyes. For some reason, I just want to cry out loud. Umiyak ng malakas hanggang sa may makarinig sakin, gusto kong malaman nilang nasasaktan ako, nahihirapan sa hindi malamang kadahilanan.
Everything felt familiar and I don't have any idea why. Everything was just felt so real like it happened before, like those voices are just memories, a nightmare.
Walang lakas kong isinandal ang sarili sa pader. it took me half an hour to calm down. I cried and cried until I ran out of tears.
I faced the huge monitors na ngayon ay naka pause. I stared at Yurika who's peeking at the close door. I weakly played the video and watch it.
I have to get this done. I'm too worn out right now. I need to rest.
Mabilis ang pangyayari sa monitor, the next thing I saw, Yurika was drag out outside by a man. Mahina akong napatawa hanggang sa nauwi sa halakhak dahil sa napanood.
I laughed like an insane man. My insanity just slips away as I stared at the man who's now dragging Yurika outside my house. Tumalima ako sa kabilang screen kung saan kita ang labas ng backdoor. I saw two woman standing, their backs are facing at the cctv camera at hindi nakatulong ang madilim na paligid para makita ko ang mga mukha nila o maitsuraan ang pustura nila, pero hindi na importante kung sino ang dalawang babae iyon dahil ang mahalaga ay alam ko kung sino yung isa sa kanila.
I watch them at the monitor as they vanish together with the unconscious Yurika. I waited for almost 15 minutes but they never came back. Dumako ang tingin ko sa isang monitor kung saan kita ang pintuan ng kwarto ko, minutes later I saw the impostor knocking at my door.
Sinilip ba nila ako? Checking on me? Takot na mahuli?
I laughed again.
"You are all stupid."
I rewind the footage again and paused it where I can see a man at the kitchen's backdoor dragging my friend.
Tinitigan ko ng matagal ang mukha niya at kalaunay muling natawa.
"Tahi-tahimik lang pero nasa loob pala ang kulo ng tarantado."
I smirked as I watched his face.
Tumayo na ako at pinatay ang monitor. Naglakad ako sa madilim at tahimik na pasilyo ng bahay namin. Parang nakalimutan ko na ang nangyari kanina dahil sa natuklasan.
Betrayal is such a bitch huh.
My thoughts are clouded by anger for those traitors. All the pain that I've felt earlier just vanished in a snap.
I stopped my pace when I saw the replay Lucy again, standing in front of me. Nakatitig ang mga mata niya sakin at wala itong emosyon hindi tulad kanina.
"Let the memories flow in your trail let them be remembered, walk with them Lucy. If memories suddenly flashes let it be those are meant to happen anyway. The past keeps us alive. What happened back then brought us here, so let yourself remember every bit of the past even if it pains you, anger you."
"So those were memories?"
Panandalian kong nakalimutan ang natuklasan dahil sa mga sinabi niya.
Malungkot siyang ngumiti sakin.
"What happened?" halos pabulong kong tanong.
"You'll remember everything sooner or later. You have so much to remember at kailangang maalala mo lahat ng yun along the way of this fucking hell hole journey."
"Hell hole? Akala ko ba we wanted this life? Pagkakaalala ko never kong pinagpantasyahang magkaroon ng impyernong buhay."
Mahina siyang tumawa, she laughed without any emotions.
"We wanted this normal life." she quoted. "Not these problems your facing."
Napairap nalang ako at nagpatuloy sa paglalakad. "Anong pinagikaba?" balewala kong tanong nang malampasan ko siya sa kinatatayuan niya.
"Believe me Lucy, ito na ang pinakanormal na buhay na kaya mong matamasa."
Huminto ako sa paglalakad at pataglid siyang hinarap.
"I've experience hell back then didn't I?"
"Sabi ko naman sayo diba, hometown natin impyerno." saad niya habang hindi gumagalaw sa kanyang pwesto, she didn't even bother to look at me.
Tinitigan ko siya, maya-maya ay nilingon niya ako.
"You sure this plan will work?" I asked her the moment I met her familiar eyes.
She smiled wickedly.
"What if we failed?"
"Que Sera, que sera. Whatever will be, will be." she sang then vanished.
Mahina akong napatawa at maglalakad na sana nang makita kong lumabas ang isang lalaki na kanina ko pa gustong saksakin.
Gulat ang ekspresyon niya nang mapagawi ang tingin niya sakin.
"Gising ka pa?"
I smiled at him.
Obvious ba? Bobo.
"Di makatulog." maiksi kong sagot kaya napatawa siya.
"Take a rest Lucy. You need it." marahan akong tumango sa sinabi niya habang nakatitig sa kanya. His smile remains on his face.
"Saan ka pupunta?" tanong ko.
"Kusina, nauhaw ako." tipid niyang sagot bago maglakad papalapit sakin.
Sinabayan ko siya ng lakad sa mahabang pasilyo papunta sa hagdan.
"Alam mo nung bago ako sa White Land, I was really scared and lost." I randomly shared.
Mula sa pherephiral view ay nakita ko naman siyang napalingon sakin.
"Well who wouldn't?"
Huminto kami sa may hagdanan.
"I'm really happy that I've met you, you and the squad." I faced him as I utter those words.
"Thank you for helping me, for being there when I needed all of you, and for supporting me. Thank you for being a good friend. You are one of the people that are important to me and I'll do everything to help and protect you."
Malumanay siyang ngumiti sakin.
"Nag papaalam ka ba?" natatawa niyang tanong.
Umiling ako at ngumiti. I hide all my anger with sincerity.
"Nope. I just realize how lucky am I to be one of your friends. Thank you." naglakad ako papalapit sa kanya at niyakap siya.
"You're like a brother to me now Ivan. Thank you for being my friend. Hindi kita makakalimutan at ang ginawa mo."
One, eaten by greed, two, blinded by belief, third is forced, fourth is accursed, the fifth is stuck between a rock and a hard place and lastly the sixth went after fifth. Now where do you fall on the said reasons Fuentabella?