How much do you love me??? 😁 Two updates in less than a week!! And this is a big one!! Hope you like it! There are a lot of things happening in this one so if you hate it I'm sorry 🙈. There's also a lot of lead up to big stuff next chapter!
Recap: The second momentous occurrence was the announcement that Mullingan troops were moving from the capitol toward Elysium.
"Louis, what's the news?" Kalysta asked, stepping into the council chambers.
"Well, Murdoch certainly isn't hiding," Thomas called from where he was leaning over maps. "Our spies sent word that a force of Mullingan troops left the capitol two days ago. Good news for us, they can't travel at nearly the rate our messengers can. Based on the terrain and season, I'd give us two weeks, assuming they march all day and take short breaks at night. They'll probably take longer, but I want to be safe."
"I asked Louis, not you," Kalysta pointed out.
"He's right," Louis chimed in. When she glanced at him he gave her a searching look that told her he knew her open secret and was debating whether or not to mention it.
She shook her head at him and he nodded before looking back at the maps.
"I don't believe a war council is the place for you, Princess, since you're not supposed to be under stress," her father voiced, crossing his arms and failing in his attempt not to look petulant. "Stress is dangerous for an expecting woman."
He'd done it. He'd really done it.
Louis looked weary, Thomas was purposefully not looking at her, and the rest of the room was staring at her avidly.
"I believe it's up to me to decide what causes me stress, not you, King Jonathan," she responded coolly.
"Princess, as much as I agree with you, none of us wants to put your child at risk," Louis sighed. "I can't, and won't, tell you what to do, but it is my humble request that you make yourself scarce. I'll be sure to send you regular reports on what is going on and welcome any notes of input that you send in return."
Kalysta fought hard to keep the sneer off her face, but she allowed herself the disparaging, "You spiteful child," as she passed her father on the way out the door. He would get his way, but that didn't mean she was totally powerless.
She'd have more time to sit with Zayn now, if she could bring herself to keep something from him. Oh, it was only a matter of time before he got the news, a short matter of time, but she had no idea how to broach the subject.
"Princess?" a girl called out, approaching her. Kalysta recognized her as one of the younger nurses who worked in the infirmary. "I was told to come fetch you. They're going to be moving the Ambassador."
"What?" Kalysta snapped. "Under whose authority?"
"Just follow me," the girl said. "Everything will be explained there."
Kalysta did, hurrying the pace as much as she could. If her father tried anything...
As it turned out, her fears were ungrounded. The real reason to move him was overpopulation of the infirmary. When they arrived, the long room of beds was fully occupied with people, insomuch that her entrance was barely noticed.
She rushed over to Zayn's bed, dodging children, and stepped inside the curtains.
"It's insane out there," she breathed.
"I can hear that, actually," Zayn commented, his hoarse voice holding a teasing note.
The physician, Adam, came in. "You got my message, then?" he puffed, looking a bit overwhelmed.
"Obviously. What is going on in here?"
"There's been an outbreak of dysentery among one of the groups of refugees," Adam answered. "The children and elderly are being hit the worst, but I haven't seen a case this bad in quite some time. I can't turn them away, I need the Ambassador's bed, and frankly he's recovered enough to have his own room and check-ins."
"Are you sure?" Kalysta countered. "I won't have you taking chances with his health."
"I'm sitting right here, K-Princess." Zayn's voice was slightly irritated. "You can talk to me. And if you were to ask me I'd say I'm feeling much better and that I would like to leave to make room for someone who needs immediate care more than I." He coughed, in opposition to his statement.
"Are you sure?" Kalysta directed the question to him now.
"I'd get better sleep in my own room," he added. "This place is a bit boisterous." His expression was an earnest plea to which she couldn't say no.
"I suppose it'd be alright," she relented.
Adam snorted. "I'm so glad you agree with my decision."
"Enough talk," she retorted. "What will this take? What's the best way to move him?"
"I would suggest a covered litter."
"Covered?"
"Have you any idea the sentiment toward the Ambassador at this moment?" he asked.
"No," she answered quickly. "Have you?"
"No, but I would guess that while his position, loyalties, and role in the future remain uncertain that we shouldn't broadcast how weak he is," Adam pointed out.
"I would like to protest the use of the word weak," Zayn chimed in.
"You can't walk," Adam reminded him.
"It's fine," Kalysta assured Zayn, running a hand over his soothingly. "You'll take your proper time to heal, however long that may be."
"Then a covered litter for him?"
"I don't think we have something of that manner," she confessed. "We'd have to fashion one."
"Didn't Royals generally get carried around in those at one point in time?"
"Not for several generations now. I've heard of them, seen them in paintings, but that's about it."
"Think there may be some stored somewhere?"
"It's doubtful." Kalysta crossed her arms. "What of the wheeled chairs? I've seen several of the older leaders of nobility going about in them when their joints don't let them walk much anymore. That would be a less dramatic and far faster way to move him."
"Do you know of one noble who would be willing to part with theirs for now?" Adam asked skeptically. "I treat some of them for their joint pains and they are not exactly understanding or accommodating."
"Maybe not if you asked," Kalysta agreed, "but they can't exactly deny their Princess Heir if she wants something."
"Whatever it takes."
"Is that really necessary?" Zayn rasped. "We haven't really tried me walking. Perhaps I can manage it with some help."
Kalysta opened her mouth, but the physician beat her to the rejection of that option.
"Absolutely not, Ambassador," he said. "A move is already going to cause you stress, pain, and extreme fatigue. We're not relying on your limbs without being sure of their status."
Zayn sighed and looked straight ahead, part of his jaw clenched in frustration.
"It's alright," Kalysta assured. "We'll get it figured out."
He nodded, but didn't respond, and his jaw stayed clenched.
It was an ordeal to procure one of the chairs, just as Adam had predicted and the movement itself was difficult. Several men were needed to transfer Zayn from the bed to the chair, despite how much weight he'd lost in the past weeks. It hurt him too, evidenced by the contortions of the moveable muscles in his face and the tension in his body once he was settled. He made no noise, though.
Kalysta walked by his side as a nurse pushed him out of the infirmary. She sent another nurse ahead to clear the hallways in their path. Adam was right that people didn't need to see him like this. Once Zayn had determined that there weren't too many watchful eyes, he consented to holding her hand. He even gave it a quick squeeze and then smiled once they reached the room. His pain was clear to see in his demeanor. It worsened as they lifted him from the chair.
She thought the worst was over, but as they set him on the bed he tensed, his eyes rolled back, and his limbs shook in spasmodic vibrations.
"Zayn!" she shrieked, rushing over to pat his face. "What's wrong?
"Adam!" she yelled next.
"Get back!" the physician called urgently.
She obeyed and watched as the man hovered over Zayn and pushed his eyelids back.
"Lift him and set him on the floor!" he ordered the men who had helped transfer Zayn from the chair.
"What?" Kalysta snapped. "Why would you do that?" She tried to intercede, but a nurse stopped her.
"Stay back!" Adam bellowed.
Kalysta stood against the wall and watched as they put Zayn's writhing body on the ground. It was an appalling sight.
"Turn him on his side!" Adam ordered next. "Turn him or we'll have real problems!"
Kalysta whimpered and covered her mouth, wishing she could keep in the horrified tears pouring from her eyes and desiring even more to help. All she could do was watch the scene.
Zayn's quivering continued for what seemed like ages, though it was actually only a few minutes. Some blood dribbled from his mouth, making her heart almost stop, but then she was distracted when a puddle of liquid formed around his body. Ordinarily she would have been disgusted at the thought of someone wetting themselves, but all she could muster was pity and panic. Something was terribly, terribly wrong.
Eventually his limbs stilled and his body relaxed. He slumped and Adam immediately set to work. Nurses fetched towels and cloths.
"What was that?" Kalysta called, not daring to approach. "He's bleeding still!"
"Calm yourself, Princess," he snapped. He opened Zayn's mouth and carefully looked in. "He bit the tip of his tongue is all," he answered then. "At least he didn't vomit."
The nurses mopped up the mess and fetched new clothes, but no one made any move to put Zayn back on the bed.
"Why is he still on the floor?" she pressed.
"Princess, if you disturb my process again I will have you escorted out," Adam warned. "Stay silent and I'll answer your questions later."
Once they'd changed his clothes and cleaned him some, the men put him back in the bed. Adam sat at the bedside and listened to Zayn's heart and breaths. At first he was rechecking constantly, but then he checked every few minutes, checking over the rest of Zayn's body. He pinched at the Zayn's fingers to check responsiveness and then went back to listening to his heart. Then he was looking at the responsiveness of his feet and toes. This went on for at least twenty minutes.
Finally, Adam sent the assistants and nurses away. He straightened the blankets and pillow around Zayn and then beckoned Kalysta forward. "Alright, what are your questions?"
"What just happened?" she breathed.
"It's a problem that I've seen most with apoplexy (A/N: apoplexy is the old term for a stroke or paralysis)," he answered. "I suspected it might show up when he had problems controlling his muscles, but I had hope since it hadn't displayed before now. There seems to be a connection between muscular deficits and these fits. Has he ever had this problem before now?"
"I-I'm not sure," Kalysta stammered. "I can have someone fetched who would know better, though."
"It matters not," Adam sighed. "The problem exists now for sure."
"What can you do?"
"Nothing," he answered, stretching and standing.
Kalysta tried to even out her breathing following such a blunt and careless answer. "What do you mean, nothing?"
"Every case is different. He might never have another fit. He may have many. I do know that it's good he's here now. Stress seems to exacerbate it, so it's best that he's given plenty of rest and no trouble."
"Will... will he be alright?"
"I can't say." Adam sighed. "He'll need to be watched at all times, because if certain precautions aren't taken during a fit he could very well die."
She nodded, breathing deeply to stave off panic. She'd thought him past this point of danger. His progress had given her such hope.
"I have to go see to my other patients," he said next. "I'll send a nurse in to watch him. Send for me if he doesn't wake in the next ten minutes."
Kalysta nodded. "Could you have someone sent to find Commander Louis Tomlinson? Tell him it's an emergency."
"Very well."
He left and she labored to drag one of the plush sitting chairs from by the fireplace and over to the bedside. She wanted to be with him for a time and calm him when he woke up.
Louis burst into the room a few minutes later, followed by a nurse.
"What's wrong?" he breathed, rushing over to the bed and staring at Zayn intently.
"He had some sort of fit," Kalysta answered carefully. "He fainted or something and his muscles spasmed and he-he wet himself, and I-I couldn't do anything." She held in a sob.
Louis reached out and clutched her shoulder in comfort for a moment.
"Has he ever had one before?" she asked.
"Nothing like that, no," Louis breathed. His face pinched in worry. "What did the physician say?"
"Not much. It's related to his muscle problems. It may or may not happen again. There's no way to know."
"Bloody hell," Louis sighed, scrubbing a hand over his face.
"How goes the war council?" she asked carefully.
Louis looked over at the nurse. "Could you leave for a few minutes?" he asked her. Kalysta had forgotten she was in the room.
"The physician said to-" she started.
"Just a few minutes," Louis cut her off, speaking assuredly and giving her a soft smile. "I'd count it as a personal favor."
"I-I suppose so." The woman blinked at him for a second and then left.
"I wish you could be in that council if just to stop the squabbling," he sighed once the door had closed. "It seemed they only behaved if you were there. Your father is a stubborn ass who is quite knowledgeable and willing to berate others with that. Thomas enjoys nettling him for the fun of it, as you can imagine. My children act better, in my opinion."
It was Kalysta's turn to sigh. "My father is quite unhappy with me, so I imagine he's taking it out on you all."
"Any ideas how to help me?" Louis ventured.
"None of an interpersonal nature. However, the physician mentioned an outbreak of dysentery in the refugee camps. I'd suggest sending a few of the surveyors out to ensure that there are proper areas for the people to relieve themselves that is well away from the streams and wells for drinking. The last thing we need is for illness to spread to the troops before they even see battle."
"Yes, you're quite right."
"You'd better get back," she pushed. "If they're that bad with you, I imagine they'll be at each other's throats in your absence. I'll send word if anything happens."
Just as she said this, though, Zayn stirred, groaning and shuffling.
"Get the nurse!" Kalysta urged. "Zayn, love," she whispered, "are you alright? How do you feel?"
"What's happened?" he moaned.
"You-you had a fit."
"Ambassador," the nurse greeted, rushing into the room at Louis's prompting. "How are you? Do you remember what occurred?"
"I'm sore," Zayn answered. "My body hurts. I don't remember anything except leaving the infirmary."
"You're alright now," the nurse said, holding her hand to his chest and counting his breaths. "You had a fit as we moved you and you've only just now woken up from it. Do you have a history of muscle fits?"
"No, of course not," Zayn breathed.
"Well, just rest and let me know if you feel any different later," she said. She stepped back, but said, "It'd be best if he had privacy and quiet in which to sleep."
Louis nodded. "Hey, mate, you're in good care," he said, reaching in to grasping Zayn's forearm. "Get strong so I can kick your ass for giving us a fright."
Zayn tried to smile, but grimaced in pain instead. "I'll be alright, Tommo."
Louis scoffed.
"Zayn," Kalysta breathed.
"I'm in different clothes," Zayn said abruptly. "Why am I in different clothes?"
"You-well, you lost continence during the fit and-and your body relieved itself," Kalysta whispered. "You needed new clothes."
His chin quivered and he stared up at the ceiling. "I'd like to be by myself, now, please," he whispered. His voice shared his abject misery.
"But I-"
"Kalysta," Louis cut in. He gestured with his head toward the door.
She was frustrated. Why did he want her gone so much? "I'll be back," she promised, turning toward the door. The nurse joined her, leaving Louis in with his best friend.
"He'll be alright, Princess," the nurse said quietly. "He's in a bit of shock."
Kalysta just nodded. She couldn't bring herself to leave entirely, though, so she stood against the wall opposite the door and waited for Louis to exit. She wondered what he had to say to Zayn when Zayn wanted to be left alone. And why would Zayn allow him to stay and not her? It made her incredibly angry.
Louis left a few minutes later and motioned for Kalysta to walk with him.
"Why did he make me go?" she asked.
"Kalysta, have you no compassion?" Louis sighed.
"I beg your pardon?" She was of half a mind to show him just what she thought of that sentiment.
"Do you remember how helpless and ashamed you were when you recovered from your bout in the sea?"
"Of course."
"He's going through the same, but for a longer time. Can you imagine what it's like for a man, whose very worth is judged on what he can do for himself? Now, he not only relies on other people to help him relieve himself, but he can't control his own bodily functions. He's having a hard time and he feels like he's losing face, in front of you, in front of everyone. Do you blame him for wanting a moment to himself? He hasn't had that for several weeks now, between you and all the doctors."
"He said all this?" she asked petulantly.
"He didn't have to say it all; he shouldn't have to. Anyone with a pair of eyes and an understanding heart should see it."
Kalysta looked down, properly chastened. These things hadn't crossed her mind once and now that Louis had pointed them out she felt bad for that. He was going through more than she could understand and all she'd done was hover and fret over him. "I suppose I'll wait to go back for a while."
"Well, I'd certainly wait until you're ready to tell him about your condition," Louis pointed out.
"How can I?" she whispered, her voice catching.
"How can you tell him the truth?" He snorted. "He deserves to know."
"Yes, he does," she agreed. Her stomach tossed at the idea.
"I have to be back to the council," Louis sighed. "I'll let you know any major decisions and plans."
"Thank you." She nodded to him in parting and made her way toward her quarters.
Her head hurt, she was exhausted, and she was queasy after the upheaval of the day. She needed sleep before dinner and all the events of the evening.
--- --- --- --- --- --- ---
Delia woke her up at the sixteenth hour. "Milady, you need to ready for dinner."
Kalysta groaned and rolled over. "I think I'll take dinner in my room tonight. Or not at all."
"Your father sent word that he wanted you at dinner specifically."
"Stubborn ass," Kalysta grumbled, repeating Louis's opinion.
"It's not my fault!" Delia protested.
"No, I wasn't referring to you," Kalysta laughed mirthlessly. "I was talking about my fool of a father. I told my parents at lunch that I was with child and, instead of discussing options or perhaps how I felt at the news, he started interrogating me about the father. Because that's what I want to talk to my father about." She snorted and stood up to ready herself. She was struck with a moment of vertigo, though, and immediately sat back down on the bed.
"Are you alright?"
"Yes, I'm fine." Kalysta stood back up and went to Delia, taking the dress the maid held out for her. "I'm tired of wearing black already," she moaned.
"Only another five months of it," Delia joked. "Since you brought it up, is there any chance your Ambassador is the father of your child?"
"Slim chance at best," Kalysta confessed. "Even if I wished my hardest, it doesn't change the fact that Zayn and I were doing our utmost not to let this happen, while the Prince had no such qualms. I can't even let myself hope for it."
"I'm confused how jumping into bed with the Ambassador falls under the description of 'doing your utmost' not to get with child," Delia snorted.
Kalysta sighed. "Very funny."
The evening passed excruciatingly slowly. It wasn't a large affair, just a few nobles sat with them in a dining room. Her father ignored her, talking to the noblemen about the effect the war would have on crop yields. Kalysta was focusing on not throwing up. Her stomach rebelled against every food placed in front of her. She had a few bites here and there so as not to appear rude, but she mostly pushed her food around her plate. Finally, dinner was over and she joined her mother and the noblewomen in a small parlor of couches. It was a time to sip tea and talk about the latest gossip and Kalysta felt no desire to join in. The tea settled her stomach some, for which she was grateful, but she just wanted to go back to bed.
--- --- --- ---
Several weeks passed. She was incredibly bored for most of that time. Word was sent to her from the council chambers about the progression of the war. Murdoch had sent a force to the border of Elysium to attack and had sent another toward Wolvecaster close after. Louis assured her that they were several steps ahead of Murdoch in every move, but she could read between the lines of his messages. While they could handle Murdoch, they were still suffering high numbers of casualties. Mullingar troops suffered as well, but the loss of life made her more ill than the state in which her pregnancy left her.
She was also receiving word from Adam about Zayn's progress. She hadn't been back to visit him, though he'd sent word asking after her specifically. Since he was bed-ridden he was easy to evade him. He had surely heard of her pregnancy and she didn't know how to face him with that thought so prominent. It broke her heart to think of what he would say. Would he be kind about it? Would he reject her? She tortured herself with all the possibilities. She knew she would have to face him at some time, though.
Eventually, she read in a report that he could move about minimally, taking heavily assisted walks up and down the hall. She wanted to see this, and hang the consequences. She would see him.
When she went to the corridor where his room was located, he was up and about. Somehow, someone had managed to give him permanent use of one of the wheeled chairs. He was using it to assist in walking now. Putting most of his weight forward on it, he stepped carefully. Two nurses walked next to him, one on either side, hovering and ready to catch him should he lose his balance.
He looked good. Though he'd lost the lean muscle of before, he was working hard at regaining it. She had a minute to inspect him as he was focused on his feet and the effort of walking again. He said something to one of the nurses and she laughed, patting his shoulder. For a moment he stumbled, but he caught himself, steadied his body, and continued, slowly.
Kalysta stepped forward then, catching his attention. He looked up, smiled big, and she struggled not to run into his arms right that moment. In the time she'd been staying away he had regained full control over his facial muscles. It was both a relief and a pain. She hadn't realized how much she missed that smile while he was ill. A smile was his first response to seeing her, which gave her more hope than she cared to admit.
"Well, look who it is," she joked.
"I could say the same," he responded wistfully. "Ladies, I think I can handle this on my own for the moment."
"Sir Malik, I don't think it's a good idea to leave you alone," one voiced in censure.
"Thanks for your concern, but I'll be fine."
The nurses both sighed, but nodded and walked past Kalysta, curtsying slightly.
"Sir Malik?" Kalysta asked once they'd gone.
"I'm not exactly an ambassador anymore, am I?"
"I suppose not." She walked forward and stood in front of the chair. "You look good. How are you progressing?"
"Slower than I like, but I'll get there. Bethany says I should be walking on my own in another couple of weeks."
"Bethany?" She pushed down the irrational twinge of jealousy.
"One of the nurses," he answered, his grin letting her know that he was aware of her jealousy.
She sighed and walked over. "I've missed you," she whispered. She looped an arm around his waist and gestured for him to keep walking. She was confident she'd be able to help him stay upright.
"I asked you to come visit," he pointed out.
She listened for any traces of anger or reprimand in his voice, but there was none. All his voice had was a wistful sadness. "Louis said you were feeling more down since I was hovering," she confessed.
"He's an ass."
"No, he had a point. You were struggling with recovery and my presence wasn't doing much good."
"I understand."
Silence fell, not even an uncomfortable one. They reached the end of the corridor and turned around carefully. She slowed him down some, hoping that he'd be steadier and there would be less of a risk of him losing balance.
"How does it feel to be out of bed?" she asked next.
"Better than I can describe. I was starting to lose hope that I'd ever walk toward the end there. It felt like I'd been in that bed for years."
"You're more of a man of action, so I can imagine how it felt to be stuck for so long. Did you learn to knit or do anything productive while you lounged in bed?" she teased.
He laughed softly. "Not quite. I mostly brooded and annoyed my caregivers."
"Then I'm glad I wasn't here to partake in the annoyance."
"What about you?" he asked carefully. "I heard you've had a bit more time on your hands."
"I haven't been doing that much," she said, skating around the subject. She wasn't ready to talk about that yet.
As always, he seemed to sense her mood, for he changed the subject entirely. "You wouldn't believe what happened the other day," he said.
"What?"
"I had the nurses open my window for some fresh air, and a blasted sparrow flew in! Then, it punished me for its stupidity by flying about in circles near the ceiling and twittering its bloody beak off. I was even more motivated to walk just to get away from the thing."
Kalysta laughed and felt herself relax. Things would work out. Zayn was on the mend and his smile still cheered her more than anything else.
A/N: BIIIIIIG things to come next chapter!! Love you all! Vote please and COMMENT! I love your comments, guys, seriously. I laugh, cry with you, and try to respond to them all.
All the love,
~Kari~