Gogmagog was a giant without peer, he was stronger than any being alive and he was royally smashed out of his face. He looked over his shoulder, towards the ocean and lobbed his mug as hard as he could. He missed the stupid human boats bobbing around in the water, it was tempting to blame the ale, but he wasn't even seeing double yet. With a sigh, he laid his hands back down on the bar. There had been a time when he could have struck a sparrow from the air with a stone, and now he couldn't hit a ferry with a boulder if he tried, which he had.
"Do you remember those days Balor" Gog shouted to the one-eyed giant propping up the other end of the bar "I remember knocking that prat Corineus off his perch with one good throw"
He mimed throwing and accidentally lost the grip on his second Ale and watched it tumble through the air behind him. He still missed the boats. Balor, lone eye closed as always, chuckled when he heard the splash and took another swig from his bus-sized tankard.
"As I recall Gog" said Balor with a wry chuckle "I mostly wandered around like a blind beggar until you got bored and bade me open my eye"
Gog felt a swell of happiness as he remembered the havoc his war-brother wreaked on the battlefield, the chaos the opening of his eye could cause. Once the other giants had fought their fill he would let Balor destroy what was left, it was simpler that way.
"whatever happened to those days brother?" asked Gog, letting the ale work its doldrums over him.
Balor had no answer, not one that would avoid a brawl, at any rate, so he remained silent. The other Fomorians, some giants, some smaller, all supped from their tankards. It felt strangely appropriate that the defence that kept them from returning to Britain, the Plymouth breakwater, was also the place where they quenched their thirst. It was easy to build up a thirst in the ocean realms, even after centuries amongst the Fomor he still wasn't used to the salt.
"As I recall, brave Gogmagog" said a voice from the lighthouse "you got fat, drunk and lazy. It's no surprise you lost your fight with Corineus"
There was a great deal of silence, even the wind itself stopped whistling and went in search of safer areas to breeze through. Tankards were drained, thanks were muttered and a whole host of Fomorians disappeared into the sea leaving Gog, Balor and the voice in the lighthouse.
"You have a nerve!" yelled Gog "but fuck if you aren't right"
He let the hand, raised to smite, drop to the bar in defeat. The doldrums caught him strong tonight, barely the temper to brawl. Only when his hand was lowered did the voice from the lighthouse step forwards. Gog had been expecting Tavy, the old giant loved to put him in his place, or maybe Tamara. He wasn't expecting Joan of the Wad.
"Well look brother" said Gog, nudging Balor with his elbow "we're in the presence of royalty"
He spat off to one side and glowered down at the queen. She was tiny compared to him, but still managed to look down her nose.
"Queen of the pixies" said Joan, alighting on a seat moved especially for her "keeper of secrets, protector of Cornwall and a useful friend to have if you're a useless oaf of a giant"
His fist moved, motivated by anger and drunken rage, but before he could bring it down the very stones of the breakwater started to hum. It didn't affect her, she belonged, but for him and everyone trapped on this side of the breakwater it was impenetrable. The queen barely batted an eye, sipping politely from a hip flask she wore around her waist. Through the drunken haze, he noticed her outfit wasn't very courtly, it looked like motorcycle leathers.
"I do love the feel of the wind in my hair" she said, following his gaze "but I assure you, my brave warrior, that if you attempt such vulgarity again even a ride across the country won't tempt me to return"
He spat again just to make a point and settled down. Behind his foul glare the wheels of his brain had started spinning again, he sensed the lure of a ploy laid out before him. He kept the glare in place, let the queen think she was ahead in the game, the role of stupid oaf had served him well in the past.
"Why do you grace us with your presence your majesty" he said, words laced with contempt "you are queen of nowhere important, protected by geography and luck. Why should I waste my time listening to you"
He watched her eye twitch and smiled to himself, the queen never liked to be reminded of her insignificance in the grand scheme of things, and she liked to pretend at being a player in a game nobody else was playing
"You are laughed at Giant" she said, spitting much like him "just like I am"
He heard the resentment in her words and felt something that could almost have been pity, but he quashed it before he could cause trouble.
"However" said Joan, continuing "what if I could change that"
Gog leaned in closer, and he could sense his brother leaning in too. Trapped behind the breakwater was the way of things, what she spoke of was treason or conquest. Change. She smiled and he let her, she had his attention.
"I have a small force at my control" she said "my people are spies, assassins but not warriors, not like you. However, I wonder what would happen if we combined our forces"
Gog looked over at his brother. They were the fiercest warriors in the lands, but it was subterfuge that allowed Bruttus and Corineus to gain the upper hand. If he had Joan and her sneakers on his side, it could change things.
"It's an interesting dream" he said, mind flitting through battle scenarios "but the breakwater stands, this blasted ward will always stand and I will always remain here"
The queen didn't stop smiling and for the first time since the conversation began he felt off-balance.
"Ah yes, I thought you might get caught up on that trifling detail" she said, canines glinting as she smiled "but what if I told you I knew of a way through?"
He felt a hand on his arm and turned to see Balor, mouth set in concern. It was a silent warning. They both knew the schemes of fairies, pixies, and elves, but Gog had the scent of blood and battle in his nose.
"Name your terms" Gog said, meeting the queen's gaze and holding it.
Joan did not look away, in fact, her smile seemed to grow larger.
"Oberon, Nuada and all the other petty lords" she said, voice harsh "crush them all and take back the lands. Leave me Otherworld to rule and you can have everything else"
Otherworld was a seat of power, but the chance to take the lands that Corineus settled, and piss on his ancestrs for good measure, set fire to his blood. He howled a challenge to the world and heard the sky answer with a thunderclap.
"Agreed" he said, a grim smile on his face "now let me in"
He leaned forwards until the stones resounded with the power that kept him trapped, but not for much longer.
"I cannot destroy the breakwater" she said "but I do have a few secret ways in and out. Give me your Fomorians and we will break down this barrier from the inside, and then nothing will stop you and your brothers"
This was the moment, he could feel it. She had laid out such a delicious feast before him and was counting on his lust for power to make him rash. If he gave her his soldiers then he might never see them again, she might use his tools and forget about him. He needed leverage, something he could exploit if she crossed him.
"I have a condition of my own" he said, watching her face tense "a secret that I can shout to the four winds should you cross me, something your enemies would salivate to hear"
He watched her grimace and heard Balor chuckling quietly to the side. They all assumed him an oaf, but that was their mistake.
"Lean forwards, this is for you and you alone" she said at last "and I assure you should this get repeated you will never step foot on dry land again"
Gog ignored the threat and leaned close, listening to the story she told him. When she was done he choked out a laugh, unable to stop himself.
"Well my dear, it seems there is more to you than I thought" said Gog, bowing his head in respect "we have a deal, you shall have my best to do your worst to our enemies"
Joan nodded, disappearing back to the lighthouse leaving Gog alone with his brother. For the first time since Corineus had thrown him into the Plymouth Sound Gogmagog felt something old and powerful stir in his chest. Call it bloodlust, battle-rage it didn't matter. He had fire in his veins and he was ready to use it.
"Come brother, we have a war to prepare for"
Balor nodded and started walking into the ocean. Gog cast one last look towards lands, watching the humans who hadn't scurried home, the curve of the all and even that stupid lighthouse they insisted on moving inland. They were not ready for him. With a queen at his side, not even the Watcher could stop him now.