So there were a few of you on here that asked me to continue this work here on Wattpad, and that's just what I'm going to do, but if you're ever interested in checking out more of my fics, my username on archiveofourown.org is the same as this one. I'm now working on an omegaverse on that site. Also, if you ever want to chat, I'm levi.eren_ on Instagram and warriorflesh on Tumblr. :)
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It was late afternoon when I left Isabel's apartment, the sun sinking into the eastern horizon in an orange glow. As I drove home, emotions I'd never felt before flooded through me at an alarming rate. I couldn't think about the things Eren put himself through in order to provide for Izzy while their mother lay useless in her bed. I didn't want to imagine him getting beaten over and over again, not lifting a hand to defend himself against his opponent. Whenever he fought someone now, he never lost. He won every single match he was a part of, and if ever he was hurt during one, he thought nothing of the bruises or gashes that discolored his face. It all made sense now. He'd been hurt so many times that physical wounds meant nothing to him. He endured them because they were nothing in comparison to the emotional ones that refused to scar over.
He didn't deserve all the things that had happened to him, and neither did Isabel. She had been so young when she was forced to become an adult, worrying about things that most people her age knew nothing about. But why was she allowing her guilt to tear both her and her brother apart? Why couldn't she see that keeping him at a distance wasn't going to solve a thing? If anything, it was creating more problems. It was going to take a lot for her to repair the damage that she had caused throughout the years, but I was going to be behind her every step of the way, because Eren needed his sister back, and she needed him.
It wasn't until my cell phone rang in my pocket that I realized I was driving ten miles over the speed limit. I slowed down, checked my rearview mirror to see if a cop was tailing me (there were none, to my immense relief), and then dug the phone out. Putting it on speakerphone, I sat it on my lap and said, "Hello?"
"Hey, Levi, it's Mikasa. I'm calling because I have a huge favor to ask of you."
"Okay, shoot."
"Do you think you can pick up some pizzas and beverages for the big meeting tonight? I thought I was going to have enough time to get everything myself, but I got caught up in some other crap."
"Oh, don't worry about it. I'll be happy to do it."
"Thank you. Just put it all on the card I gave you for work purposes. Four large pepperoni pizzas should do, and a few liters of soda. Oh, and a small vegan pizza on top of that."
I smiled. "You don't have to get that for me. I'll be fine."
"I don't mind getting that for you, so don't try to talk me out of it."
"Okay," I said. "I'll see you tonight then."
"See you."
I ended the call and drove to one of my favorite pizza spots, glad for the task. It would help take my mind off things and that's exactly what I needed right now. Otherwise I'd picture Eren, bloody and bruised, awaiting the next punch to land. How many times had he let someone beat him? Did they goad him on while they were doing it? Did they kick him when he was down? Of course they did, because they were sick enough to pay him to roll on his side and do nothing while they clobbered him.
Oh, Eren...
Even if he received money for his troubles, I had no doubt that it had broken his spirit to endure something like that on several different occasions. How could it not? I couldn't even imagine how desperate one would have to be to allow someone to pummel you. Still, in spite of everything, he never ran. As sad as it is, he could've left Isabel to fend for herself. She wasn't his responsibility. No one would have stopped him if he left and never looked back. But he hadn't. He sacrificed his well being to take care of her, and how had she repaid him? By cutting him out of her life. I knew she felt guilty for what Raúl and his friends did, but to go that far seemed unnecessary. Was there something she wasn't telling me?
Lost in thought, I almost drove right past the pizza bistro I was heading for. I switched lanes in a hurry, earning myself several aggravated honks from a man behind the wheel of a white sedan, and pulled into the parking lot. This place was a hole-in-the-wall, but they made excellent pizza, both vegan and non-vegan alike. I parked near the front entrance and went inside, ordering four pepperoni pizzas and a vegan calzone for me (it was cheaper than a small pizza). After I paid, I stepped outside to wait.
The meeting would last for two hours, then the club would open at its usual time. Tonight I would no doubt be filing away papers, which seemed to be my area of expertise, according to Mikasa. Then again, I knew that she had invented this job of being her personal assistant/secretary on a whim. Back then I was going to refuse the position as a cage dancer for fear of losing my best friend. She threw the personal assistant job on the table in order to keep me around for Eren, because she knew he liked me. I had to admit that I was relieved when she offered me another job. Being a cage dancer seemed way out of my league, but now I was pretty sure that I could handle it.
Twenty minutes passed before I lumbered back inside the bistro to pick up the pizzas. I hauled everything out to my car, which was harder than it should have been due to my stature that equaled shorter arms than most people. Being small was irritating. Then again, the difference between Eren and me made the irritation fade almost as fast as it showed up. I thought about how his hands were large where mine were not, how they were able to bear my weight with ease, and that sent a chill down my spine.
Being short wasn't so bad when you had a tall, hot boyfriend to compensate for it.
Back on the road, making sure to keep to the speed limit this time around, I drove along back roads to avoid traffic. I got to the club in record time that way. As I parked in my usual spot, I noticed Reiner leaning up against his car a few spaces down, his eyes following me through the front windshield. I did not want to deal with him right now. I had half a mind to call Mikasa and ask her to meet me out here, but that seemed a little childish of me, so I did my best to ignore him as I pushed open the door and stepped out.
"Need some help?" Reiner called as he ambled over to my car.
Go away.
"No thanks," I said. "I have it under control."
Suddenly he was right in front of me. He was standing so close that I could feel his body heat. The smell of his cologne, too sharp and spicy, made me jolt back. The back of my head smacked against the side of my car hard enough for pain to flare out in throbbing waves.
"You should be more careful," he said in a mocking tone, taking a step closer to me.
I applied pressure to the spot I'd hit and outright glared at him. "You're too close."
"Am I?" His beefy fingers came to brush aside a lock of my hair, a smirk settling on his lips. "I don't think I am."
I had enough of this. "Yes, you are. You need to move back. Now."
"Well, you're snappy when you want to be, aren't you? Can't say that I mind."
The next thing I knew, Reiner was being slammed against the car beside mine as Eren reared up and shoved his forearm against his chest. He leaned in close and snarled, "What the fuck are you doing?"
Reiner held his hands up, but the cheeky smirk on his face said that he was anything but innocent. "Nothing."
"That's not what it looked like to me."
"Come on. I was just offering my assistance."
Eren lifted his forearm just to push it forward again. When it made contact with Reiner's chest, the smirk disappeared. "The next time he's forced to tell you to move back, you're going to have a lot more to deal with than this. If he wants you to stay away from him, then you better stay the fuck away. Am I making myself clear?"
"Crystal," Reiner sneered.
"Good." Eren stepped back. "Now go help Mikasa set up."
Reiner didn't respond. He pushed himself upright and stalked off in the direction of the club.
I stared after him and grumbled, "What is his problem?"
"Are you okay?" Eren asked while looking at the spot I was rubbing on my head.
"I'm fine now that he's gone."
"If he ever tries that shit again, you tell me right away. I don't trust him. Never have."
I thought this odd, considering Mikasa had told me that everyone who worked at Club Rose was like family. The more I thought about it though, the more I realized that Reiner wasn't exactly friendly with anyone. He was always off on his own, being pissy. Even Marco—the guy who could get along with the troll under the bridge—didn't talk to him.
"How did he land himself a job here?" I asked, feeling bad for asking. I might not like Reiner, but that didn't mean he didn't deserve his job as a bouncer. He was good at what he did, because he was nothing but brute force when it came to people messing around in the club. Still, he was an ass.
Eren walked around the hood of my car and pulled opened the passenger side door before he said, "Connie. Connie used to work here a few months back. Then he settled down with Sasha, and decided working at a nightclub wasn't very husband-y of him."
"He's married to the girl that works at the diner?"
"Yep." He grabbed the four boxes of pizza with ease, resting them on his forearm so he could shut the door. "I'll have Jean come and grab the soda. Come on. Let's go inside."
I quickened my pace until I was in stride with him and, since both his hands were occupied, I hooked my finger through one of his belt loops. He was wearing a dark-grey cut off shirt that exposed his torso rather nicely, but what drew my attention were those v-cut abs of his. Seeing them never failed to leave me speechless. But, no matter how attractive he was, it was the way he treated me that I liked the most. He was the whole package.
"What's that smile for?" Eren asked with a smile of his own.
"I'm just happy to be here with you. Is that a crime?" I kissed his bicep (it was a very nice bicep), since I was too short to kiss his cheek.
"No, not a crime," he said, but the smile faltered. "How did everything with Isabel go?"
Now it was my turn to falter. I looked up at him, saw the pain in his eyes, and murmured, "She told me everything."
"Did she"—he looked away and the pain in his eyes emanated outward onto his face—"say anything about where her and I stand?"
"There's a lot to tell you, but for the short version of it, she wants to work things out. She really does, Eren, but I think it would be wise to take things slow, for both your sakes. It's been a while since you two were on good terms."
"You don't have to tell me that."
There was a lot of chatter and commotion going on inside Club Rose tonight, but that was nothing out of the ordinary. We walked onto the dance floor and were greeted with a barrage of Hello's as Eren put the pizzas down on a folding table that had been set up near the bar. When Armin spotted us, he came waltzing our way, hips swaying from side to side as he did. Although, once he reached me, he said nothing, just stood there staring at me with his big blue eyes.
"Um, hi," I said after a while.
"That's all you have to say after everything you did in my dressing room? Two words: purple condom."
I gaped at him, mouth opening and closing as I struggled to find words to explain myself. Of course he would find out what we did. A condom and a bottle of lube didn't just disappear into thin air, so I settled for, "I'm so sorry. I'll buy you another pack."
He snorted. "I don't want another pack. What I want is details."
"What?"
"Oh, no, honey. You're not getting out of this that easy. You can 'what' me all you want."
"But he's your best friend," I said, knowing that it was a useless attempt to steer him off this path.
"Exactly. You don't have to write me an erotica novel about your experience, although I wouldn't object to that. I just want to know a few things."
"Like what?"
He looped his arm through mine and pulled me away from everyone. Once we were out of earshot, he said, "How was he?"
"I am not telling you that."
"You don't have to. I can tell by the way you're walking and staring at him like he's your own personal Jesus that he had your knees wobbling for hours. Consider yourself lucky. There are some guys out there that will tear you in half and think it was a job well done."
I stared at him, waiting for his calm expression to give way to an amused one, but it never did. "Are you even hearing what you're saying?"
"Indeed I am, sugar. Now let's get back. The meeting is about to start."
Everything was set up and ready to go, so Mikasa gathered everyone around the two folding tables that had been pushed together in the center of the dance floor. I took a seat next to Eren, who put his hand on my thigh, which felt nice. For the most part, I wouldn't have anything to do with this meeting. Even when I was an employee here, I wasn't an active part of the nightclub scene. The bouncers had to touch base on the best way to secure the club and its employees, while the dancers had to discuss choreography. I was going to be sitting here snacking on my calzone, pretty much.
As the meeting commenced, I tried to concentrate on the topics being discussed, but since they didn't involve me, I more or less zoned out after a while. It wasn't until Mikasa asked, "Does anyone have anything else to discuss before we bring this meeting to a close?" that I finally focused. Now would be a good time to ask about the male dancer position. It would be embarrassing to bring it up in front of everyone, but if I put it off, I might not ask at all.
It was now or never.
"Uh, I have something I'd like to discuss," I said in a timid voice.
Mikasa turned her attention to me, her dark eyes warm and encouraging. "Yes, Levi?"
I took a deep breath and avoided looking at anyone. "I was wondering if the male dancer position was still available. If it is, I'd like to, um, audition for the position."
Armin didn't even let Mikasa respond. He squealed and yelled, "Your fine ass doesn't have to audition! The position is yours." He eyed Mikasa. "It's his. Tell him it's his."
"You can start training with Armin as early as tomorrow," was Mikasa's response.
Everyone's eyes were on me, I could feel them, but I kept my gaze trained on her. "Thank you."
"It's me who should be thanking you. You were a hit last night, even when you didn't stay up in the cage for a full set. A lot of people are going to be coming in to watch you once I announce that you're going to be a full-time dancer. Which brings me to you." Her eyes flicked over to Eren. "I expect you to behave yourself."
Eren grinned. It wasn't a nice one. "I will. Unless someone touches him, then I can't make you any promises."
"Ugh," Ymir groaned from her end of the table. "Is this going to be another Armin and Jean? Because I won't be able to control my gag reflex, if it is."
Armin rolled his eyes. "Oh please, like you're one to talk. How many times has Eren pulled you off someone after they made a pass at Christa?"
"That's enough," Mikasa said, knocking her fist on the table a few times. "Let's wrap this up, so we can get this place opened."
The people who were still eating polished off their food in a hurry, and then we were all lending a hand at folding the tables and chairs. When everything was put away, Armin grabbed me by the arm and hurried me toward the dressing rooms. I knew why he was taking me back here, but when he pushed open the door to the dressing room that was supposed to be mine (would be mine), I still smiled like a fool. I couldn't help it. This was really happening.
"It's all yours," he declared in a singsong voice.
I stepped inside. "I guess it is."
---
Right after the club opened for the night, Mikasa sent both Eren and me home. Said that we looked dead on our feet and we'd be of little use to her that way. Neither of us could argue with that. We hadn't slept a lot the night before, maybe three hours, tops. So we did nothing to stop her when she ushered us out the front entrance with the order of getting a good night's sleep.
As we walked to my car, the night breeze cool on my face, I stretched my arms above my head and asked, "Are you heading home?" The thought of him going to the warehouse made me uneasy. He was in no shape to be fighting. There was a lot on his mind right now, and he was running on zero hours of sleep. If he ended up in a fistfight with someone determined to put an end to his winning streak, there was no saying what could happen.
"I was going to ask you if I could come over to your place for a while," he said. "I was hoping we could talk about Isabel."
"Oh, of course, yeah. You can spend the night, if you'd like."
"Going to lend me a pair of your pajamas?" There was a teasing lilt in his voice, because he knew damn well that he wouldn't be able to fit in any of my clothing. He was too tall to have any hopes of squeezing into one of my T-shirts. He'd probably rip it right down the middle, like The Incredible Hulk, which didn't sound half bad.
Still, I shot him a sideways glance and said in a huff, "You can sleep in your boxers."
"What about you?"
"I'll be wearing cozy pajamas, thank you very much."
He laughed, a good, whole-hearted laugh. "You turn into such a sassy grump when you're sleepy, did you know that? It's adorable."
"I do not."
Instead of arguing with me, he swept me up and carried me the rest of the way, kissing me until everything else was forgotten.
It took half an hour to tell him everything, the coffee I prepared beforehand going cold by the time I was through. We were sitting at my round dining table, saying nothing. The silence was heavy, unbreakable, until Eren rubbed at his temples and said, "I never blamed her for Raúl. That bastard had it out for me the second I beat him in a match. He was the unbeatable champion before then, and losing didn't hit him well. Sooner or later, he would've nailed me."
"That may be true, but you were completely unprepared when his gang assaulted you at your mom's house."
He didn't say anything, his jaw clenching and unclenching. "That doesn't matter. She shouldn't even have known that fucker. If I had kept a better watch on her, then none of this would've happened."
"You're blaming yourself for the whole thing?" I asked, stunned. It wasn't his fault. If there was anyone to blame, it was his mother. She was the one with the drug problem that put him in a tight spot. That forced him into a corner again and again. Addiction was a horrible, controlling thing, but she could have fought it for her kids. They depended on her. They needed her, but all she needed was the pills that she gave everything up for.
Eren pushed back in his seat and stood up. "Yes, I blame myself, because it's my fault. Isabel was young. She was left alone with our drug addict mother, who wasn't even our mom anymore. Of course she went to go look for me. I was the only person she had left, and that night, when she found me, I turned her away. I yelled at her and told her to never look for me again. What kind of big brother does that?"
"You were trying to protect her. You—"
He slammed his fists down on the table. "I fucked up! I should have found a way to be there for her. She needed me, and the most I could do was leave her an envelope stuffed with money every month. I abandoned her. Even when I was bloody and bruised, I should've gone home to be with her, but I couldn't. I couldn't stand the thought of her seeing me that way, because I wasn't the same person that left that house. I was someone colder, someone who was heartless. All I ever felt was anger."
"If you wouldn't have given her that money, she would've been in a worse spot then the one she was in," I said. "I'm not saying she had it easy, but you need to realize that neither did you. The only reason you became that cold, heartless person is because you wanted to provide for your little sister, and you did. She's alive today because of you." He shook his head, but I pressed on, "You're not heartless, Eren. You may have done things you regret, but Isabel knows why you did them, and she's finally ready to move on."
He sagged back into the seat and dropped his head in his hands. "I just wanted her to be happy. I wanted to give her everything she deserved, but I couldn't. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't. And that killed me, Levi. It killed me to know that she couldn't live a happy, carefree life, that she couldn't be the teenager that she was."
I stood up and went over to him. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders. He was shaking. "You did the best that you could do. Neither of you lived a happy, carefree life, but things are different now. Things are better. Isabel's in a good place, and she's happy. She just needs her big brother back. She wants her big brother back."
Eren slumped against me and I felt the wetness of his tears when he buried his face in my neck. I knew that a weight he'd been carrying around for so long had finally been lifted.