The next morning, Harry shows up in my car on the way to school. He was sitting in the back seat again, and his sudden appearance startled me, again.
"Shouldn't you be used to me turning up out of nowhere by now?" He asks humorously.
"I should, but I'm not," I say, backing my car out of the driveway and turning onto the road.
He smiles at me, seemingly content with having the element of surprise on his side.
"Interesting conversation you had with your parents over dinner last night," he says, leaning forward to rest his weight on the center console. I watch him in the rearview mirror.
"What conversation?" Blush begins to rise to my cheeks.
He clears his throat. "No, Dad, don't be crazy, I don't have a dead boyfriend," he says, mimicking my voice.
I roll my eyes, flicking on my indicator as I turn a corner. Harry erupts into laughs, pushing himself back to lean against the back seats. He stretches out his arms over the tops of the seats, grinning.
"The pure irony of that entire conversation was hilarious," he says, still laughing. He mimicks my voice again. "Boys would rather die than date me."
"I don't sound like that, dipshit," I grumble, gripping the steering wheel and glaring at Harry in the mirror, trying to fight a smile.
It's Harry's turn to roll his eyes. "Sorry that I can't copy your voice with perfect pitch," he says sarcastically.
I shake my head, still fighting a smile.
Harry smiles teasingly, leaning forward again. "Am I not your dead boyfriend, Jane?"
My vision flicks between Harry in the back seat and the road. "You're going to make me have a car accident."
He laughs again. "I'll take that as a confirmation."
I pull into the school parking lot, taking a spot relatively far from the building to keep Harry out of sight. I cut the engine and turn around to look at him.
"Have fun at school," he says.
"Thanks," I say. "I just love going to school with your old friends, any of whom could be your killer."
"Get good grades!" He calls as I shut the door behind me.
The first half of the day passes slowly, as usual, and I find myself worrying about Harry. Is he going to sit in my car all day? I know he has before, but what if someone sees him this time?
I shake my head and take a deep breath as I walk to lunch. I need to stop worrying. Harry is fine, he's always fine.
After waiting in line for a water (since I conveniently forgot my own on the kitchen counter this morning), I make my way over to the table I usually sit at. I'm almost there, looking forward to breaking into my own lunch after a monotonous morning of school, when someone catches my arm.
"Hi, Jane," Ian says, smiling. "How are you?"
I take a small step back as I remember what my trip to the mirror repair shop revealed: Ian was the one to bring the blood-stained mirror to be fixed the morning after Harry's murder. I regard him carefully, sending him a friendly smile. Or, as friendly as I can make it, when it's more than likely he killed Harry at this point.
"I'm doing fine," I say. "You?"
"I'm cool," he answers, shrugging. "Hey listen, the soccer team's having a scrimmage tonight here and I wanted to invite you to come. Our season doesn't start until later in the school year, but we always have a few scrimmages in the fall against other schools that don't count for anything."
"You're on the team?"
"Yeah. Coach said each team member is supposed to invite a few people, so...yeah." He half smiles, sticking his hands in his pockets.
"Um..." I chew on my lip, trying to make a decision. Excuses pop into my brain immediately, but could going to this scrimmage be beneficial? If Ian continues to interact with me, it must mean I'm beginning to build some of his trust. And by continuing to build his trust and learning more about him, I could prove or disprove the theory that he killed Harry. My inner sleuth prods me to go.
"Sure, Ian," I say. "I'll be there."
"Great," he says, flashing a smile. "It starts at five. See you there."
We part ways and I take a seat beside Jenna at the lunch table, Ava sitting across from me. She looks tired; exhausted, really. She rests her chin in her palm as she picks at her sandwich, staring off into space.
"Is she okay?" I ask Estella, who is sitting beside her.
"Yeah, she's fine," Estella answers, shifting and glancing at Ava. "Feminine issues."
I nod, beginning to eat my own lunch.
"You guys are going to the scrimmage tonight, right?" Max asks, setting his tray down on my other side and taking a seat.
"Of course," Jenna says. "We've been to all the scrimmages and games since freshman year. Why stop now?"
"Jane, how about you?"
"Yeah," I say. "I'll be there."
"Cool," Max says, grinning. "We've got the best team in district. We're scrimmaging against Jefferson tonight, probably our best competition for the coming season."
"Bullshit," Nate says from across from Max. "Jefferson is easy. Hawkley is the team to beat."
"Doesn't matter, we'll beat 'em both," Max says and the two of them laugh.
Jenna goes on to explain to me the high school teams we play against are from surrounding small towns, as Castle Hill High School is the only high school we have here in town. "All of the towns are realy close to each other, so the distances aren't too long," she says, shrugging. "Forget school spirit, we have town spirit."
"Oh, and make sure to wear dark blue, our school color," Max says.
"Will do," I say.
I look back at Ava, who has yet to say a word. She catches my eye for a split second before looking back down at her food, her face blank.
-
"Scrimmage? Oh God, I remember playing in those." Harry grins at me, leaning back to rest his weight on his hands as he sits on my bed. I stand at my dresser, getting ready to leave.
"Something tells me you were the star player," I say, pulling my jacket from the hook on the back of my door.
"Well," he says in an attempt to be humble, lifting a shoulder. "I was center forward, and I made a few goals here and there..."
I smirk at him. "Come on, let it out."
"I miss it so much," he blurts out in a rush of words, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. "I miss the anticipation of walking out to that field, everyone cheering, standing in front of the opposing center forward and shaking his hand before kick off, knowing that our friendliness wouldn't last for long. And then, bam! Kick off, and I had Max on my right and Nate on my left, and everything was moving so fast and the adrenaline was building and..." He stopped, his eyes alight. "I think, on that field, playing the game I loved...that was when I felt most alive."
He smiles nostalgically, staring off into space for a few moments before shaking his head, clearing himself from his haze. He stands up, arms moving to rest around my waist. "Have fun," he says, pulling me close to him. "Tell me how shitty the team is without me."
I give him a look and he laughs. "Kidding," he says. "But only half." He leans down to kiss my cheek and then my lips briefly before pulling away from me and sitting back on my bed.
"If you're staying here, watch out for my parents," I say, resting my hand on the door handle. "My mom's in one of her cleaning frenzies."
"Of course. See you later."
I nod and smile at him again before slipping out of my room, closing the door behind me.
-
The soccer field at CHHS is already abuzz with motion when I arrive. One side of the field is a sea of dark blue, and the other side is a sea of dark green. The scrimmage hasn't begun yet; I'm right on time.
The tickets are free since it's only a scrimmage, and I stand at the bottom of the bleachers, unsure of where anyone else I know is sitting. I see the team in blue, huddled on our side of the field. I suddenly hear my name, and look up to see Ria waving at me from up in the stands.
I make my way to where she, Jenna, Ava, and Estella sit. Ava has the same blank look on her face from lunch, and Estella sits loyally by her side. I sit beside Jenna.
"God, I'm excited," Ria says, grinning. "I love watching our team play."
The sun is beginning to set and the lights on the field turn on. The teams take their positions and before I know it, the ball is in play.
"Max is so fast, look at him go," Estella says as Max begins to take the ball down the field.
"He was excited to play center forward this year, wasn't he?" Jenna asks.
"Yeah. Ian is right forward, now," Ria says and sure enough, there's Ian, passing the ball back to Max in the center.
Max took Harry's position, and Ian took Max's. On the field, the other team seizes the ball, one of their midfielders slipping past Nate and running up the field. Out of nowhere, Ian dashes across the field, kicking the ball straight through the opposing midfielder's legs. Our side of the field cheers as one of our midfielders accepts the pass, kicking it to Max, who powers down the rest of the field, sending the ball past the goalie and straight into the goal.
The crowd roars and Max high fives his teammates as he jogs back to our side, grinning widely.
I blink and I see Harry in Max's place kicking the ball into the goal, dressed in the navy blue uniform, wind in his hair as he speeds down the field, kicking the ball into the goal with a force that the opposing goalie would not dare reckon with. I blink again and snap out of my daze.
Down at the level of the field, I spot Detective Whitmore leaning against one of the light poles, watching her son play. She has a small smile on her face; a proud smile.
The game bursts back into action on the field, Nate in possession of the ball this time. An opposing forward takes the ball from him as he dribbles it about three fourths down the field, maneuvering around Nate and breaking into a run with the ball. One of our midfielders takes it from him, though, running it up field and passing it to Ian. Ian shoots it into the goal, the goalie deflecting it briefly before Nate runs up and kicks it past him before an opposing defense player can get to it. Cheers erupt again.
The next point goes to the other team, and I lose focus of the game after a bit. I find myself lost in my thoughts, my chin resting in my palm as the cheering becomes muffled around me, Ria and Jenna's excited shouts being drowned out by my mind.
"I need to use the restroom."
Ava has stood up, her hands in her pockets. Ria, Jenna and I stand to let her pass, Estella going with her. We sit back down.
I watch Ava and Estella walk along the field, Ava seemingly numb to the entire event, her face blank.
What is wrong with her?
Before I can overthink anything, I stand from my seat as well. "You know, I've got to go too," I say and Jenna and Ria nod, their eyes fixated on the game as they stand for me to pass.
I make my way down the bleachers and look around for the bathrooms. They're located in a small brick building, the women's one way and the men's another. I reach out to push open the door to the women's when I hear commotion inside.
"Shh, shh," someone is saying, and the distinct sound of crying is heard.
"I can't believe I...that I..." I recognize the voice as Ava's.
"It's okay, calm down." Estella.
"I killed him, I killed him! I can't believe I..." The rest of the sentence is drowned out with sobs.
"Ava, shh."
"I killed him--"
"Shh, it's okay. I'm going to get your stuff and I'll drive you home. All right?"
The cries are reduced to sniffling and I hear footsteps. I back away from the door just as Estella steps out of it, her eyes landing directly on me.
Her lips part but she doesn't speak. We stare at each other for a few moments.
She doesn't say anything as I turn and walk away.
And once I'm out of her sight I break into a run.
I run all the way to my car and sit behind the wheel, locking my car doors and going over what I heard Ava say.
"I killed him, I killed him!"