I've never given much thought to how I'd die, but dying in a place like this would be a lot better than living a useless full of pity life, the person I'm looking at the mirror right now wouldn't recognize the person I was, but the person I was would probably lock me in a room and ask me the same question: Why so dull?
The first thing I did when I reached my room was shut the door and thank it for the hundredth time for having a lock, before throwing myself dramatically on the floor, next was the step of crying my eyes out and when the tears were all dried and gone, I've gone to the other part:
Questions.
Where do I start? But let me say that it was kind of confusing, should I go downstairs and ask the man I never knew: Why now? or should I call him Dad when I thought he didn't exist? Should I blame him for everything? Shout? Stay Calm? Run? Escape?
UGH! Why did it have to be so confusing?
Sometimes, when I was younger I would sit alone in a corner, TV turned on the highest volume, legs stretched ahead as I heard my mum babble on and off about her new job as she prepared hot chocolate before it'd turn 9 and I'd have to sleep.
I'd have one of those read-over-and-over -again kids books, which realistically consisted more of 'picture imagining' then 'reading', and I'd turn on pages until I came to a picture I NEVER understood, the title that was written was 'Family', and I remember how I one day went I bravely and asked my mum 'what does family mean?', she'd stay silent for a second, and I now wonder if she was angry or disappointed? She'd always say that we were family but as I got older I realized how We were not family, we were half a family, snatched into pieces, trying to fight in order not to lose their bond.
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HELLO! Today I finished my Science exam! This week updates will be going CRAZY!! Let me know what you think! Comment, fav & Follow! Thank youu! xx Engy
||UPDATED 21/4/2016|| 12:31 AM