After that, he was out of the room, slamming the door in process, I got out of the bed and though shaken up, made my way to a door. Opening it, I was thankful it was a bathroom. I slumped on the tiled floor and cried my heart out.
Why would he be like that?
Why would he be so gentle and caring for a while then stone cold harsh on the next minute?
I got really scared.
I raised my hands to my face but they were trembling non-stop. With a body quaking in tremors, I stood up and set myself on the shower not bothering to undress. I let the cold water run over me ruining my dress wishing it will also wash away the memories of the brutality on him. But who am I kidding. I know he can be more vicious than that. I saw it. I felt it.
Abruptly, I felt numbness. And I'm honestly not sure if this was due to the cold water or maybe my body was just exhausted with all the tension and emotions rolled up on me. I don't know anymore.
I released a deep sigh looking up for my face to meet the rushing water. Now, the question was, "Why am I still here?". I should've gathered all my strength and run away from here the moment he walked out.
I ran a hand on my wet hair.
'I should go.'
'I should go.'
'I should go'
With that thought that kept repeating inside my head, I got out of my dress and rinsed myself up. I scrubbed my arms and body until they turned red from too much friction from the fabric of my dress that I used as a sponge to clean myself. To clean the trace of the touch and kisses.
His touch and kisses.
His.
I could still feel them on my skin like invisible chains that he wrapped around me. They were heavy, thick, cold but the funny thing was some of the chains were warm and gentle and soft. And I couldn't break them. I couldn't get myself free of them.
I turned off the shower and I smelled the honey flavored soap I used. I liked it.
I found a towel hanging on a corner, I used that to cover myself and I went back to the bedroom. I cringed as I saw the crumpled sheets on he bed and unorganized pillows, reminding me of what happened. But what caught my attention was the loose shirt, a short and pair of undies laid across it.
The thought of him in this room had my heart racing.
What if he tries something again?
What if this time, he won't stop?
Stopping to get the clothes, I dressed quickly because at the back of my mind, I almost see him opening the door while I was half-dressed or even worst, naked. I know I'm being paranoid but that happens when you had an unpleasant experience.
I need to go home.
With a new determination in mind, I came for the door and carefully twisted the knob but it was locked. My eyes widened in another rush of fear.
Is he keeping me here?!
I slammed my hand against the door and furiously twisted the knob again and never budge. For a good hour, I did everything I could to get out but I can't. I sat on the bed when I felt too tired to try another attempt. My hands hurt from rapping the door non-stop. I decided to lie down. Feeling the softness of the bed, I closed my eyes but the sound of the door creaking made me open them again immediately.
I saw his silhouette on the doorway and I stood up readying myself to look for something to defend myself this time. He strolled in like nothing happened. Even on the darkness of the room, I could his face held emotionless but he seemed harmless and calmer than earlier. The sound of his shoes on the floor seemed too loud and it made my senses sensitive for anything. I gulped when he neared me and he studied me from head to toe. A tingling sensation coursed through my body and I cursed myself for having this kind of reaction when instead, I should hate him.
My eyes then landed on the object he was holding. It's my phone!
"I-Is that my phone?", I am not sure if he heard me because I could barely heard myself asking.
"Yes", he said when I expected him not to answer my question. Now with me looking at the floor, he silently shoved the phone onto my line of sight. And I was like just looking at it for a few seconds and with shaking hands, I took them.
When I flipped it up my eyes widened at the cracks on the screen and quickly tried to turn it on except it remained unresponsive.
"What happened?! What did you do?!", I held the thing on my hand and glared at him. I don't know where this brave version of me came from was. I should be cowering in his presence but in some miraculous twisted way, I didn't. Maybe I should thank my father for teaching me how to move on quickly from unpleasant things and implanting on my brain that I had it worse. He taught me how to fight.
He shrugged as an answer and that fueled me more. Having enough of his attitude wherein I think I deserved a good reply from him, I threw the object in my hand at him, hitting hit broad chest. Just then, I noticed that he was now wearing gray sweat pants and a black sweat shirt and he also smelled fresh from the bath. But that was not my concern for now.
"What the hell did you do?! Why is my phone broken?", I shouted at him. I know you think it was kind of childish of me to just lash out because of a phone when in fact, I could buy thousands of them in a snap of my fingers but for now, that phone was my temporary means of running off from here. From him. And now, it's gone. I planned to call William though I know he'll be treating himself from the good punch Sebastian gave him, but he's the only person I know who'll help me.
He raised a brow at him. The nerve of this man!
"It's annoying. It kept ringing and the name on the screen and the picture on it is disgusting so I crushed it dead"
"Damn you! Why did you have to do that! You don't own this. It's mine so you should know that you don't have the right to do that!", I kept yelling at him at his lack of reaction had it in me. To hate him more.
"But I own you", he simply said. I wanted to laugh. I wanted to laugh so hard for a moment there I thought he'll be guilty and regretting the things and action he had done to me. The expression on his face before walking out earlier could've fooled me. I thought...
"How could you be so damn evil? Are you even human?", he smirked at me.
"Believe me, love, I am still human but then I told you before, it makes me bad. And believe me more when I say, I can get a lot more evil and bad for the coming days. You haven't seen my worst. And blame that bastard William for calling. He really tests my nerves. I think it's time for him to get my message when I say to leave you alone", he smile that spread on his face was scary.
"You want him, right? It's too bad I want you and he can't have you". He held up a hand to touch my cheeks but I swatted it away. He then let his arms hang on either side of him.
"Let's see how well can you protect him from me", he turned his back to leave but I held his wrist stopping him on his track.
My fear of something happening to William gripped me. I can't let something happen to him. He's important for me.
"What are you going to do to him?", my trembled from my fear and pleading.
"You have to wait for it, sweetheart. But I assure you that will crush him to no end", he said smiling.
"Please...", my voice croaked for another plead.
"Awwww... how sweet of you, love. Begging for my mercy for him", his smile faded and turned into something that had me letting his wrist go and made me took a step back until I felt the edge of the bed behind me. "But that only makes me want to bring him down to hell more", and with that, he left again. I crashed myself on the bed and balled my body embracing my knees and then tears freely flowed out on me.
He, lashing his worst self out on me scared me. And now, William, too. It scared me no end.
What should I do? How could I stop him?
I then fell asleep with a tear-stained face and thinking: what happened to mySebastian for the past five years?