your sobbing on the telephone basically became,
did he ever love me enough
to wish that I was his first & not
just his last
because it comes every daybreak
because moonlight’s
so much more quiet than sun
I fall asleep counting lies instead of sheep
then the cold bodies
coo
coo coo coo
& replace any warm-blooded creature myths gave
your songs about trust are now
just broken promises
(they matter too)
coo
coo coo
there is pressure in your stomach
where you want to make me shut up & stop now
so we pause
for you to replace yourself
with someone less calm
but the moonlight is so much more quiet than a
sunrise
I have dawn inside me &
intend to vomit it out onto your shoes
fertilize the flowers
so a whole meadow grows facing you
birds coo
(they matter too)
coo, coo coo, coo coo coo
we talk about this until my lids can close safe,
did he love me enough to wish that I was
his first
or just a really good last
because I tried to be really fucking
great to you
& mornings
have always been hard to bury
behind my eyes
coming second after some really great nights.