"Are you sure you feel better?" Nate asked as I climbed into his car.
"I feel fine. Where's Landon?" I asked.
"He and his sisters had to go visit their grandma or something," Nate said, shrugging. "It's just us."
Nate had just gotten out of his soccer practice. Once school had ended, I'd gone home, eaten something, and gotten my homework done while I waited for Nate. I was regretting not taking a nap, though. I was still exhausted. But, luckily, my parents hadn't gotten home yet, so it was looking like I got to avoid my mom for a few more hours. Thank god for small miracles.
"Let's get coffee before we do anything. I'm still tired," I said.
Nate drove towards our favorite coffee shop. It was small, but did good business. Unfortunately we'd seen Ethan and Will there a few times. I was really hoping today wouldn't be one of those days. I wasn't in a good mood and keep my temper in check would be a challenge I didn't want.
Nate parked the car after a few minutes and we got out. I stretched, taking in the warmth of the sun on my skin. We'd had good weather lately. Maybe I'd have my friends over to swim soon. I'd have to be careful of my shoulder, though.
"Hey, Jude." Nate nudged me, sounding surprised. "Isn't that Staz in there?"
I turned and looked at the car parked a little ways away from us. Sure enough, Staz sat in the front seat, mindlessly staring out of the windshield at the sky.
"Let's scare," I said, grinning.
Nate followed me over to the car. I banged on the window and Staz jumped so hard that he banged his head, wincing. He looked over at us, rubbing his head.
I mentally groaned as Staz unlocked the car and opened the door, getting out. Well, that wasn't part of the plan.
"Are you okay, Jude?" he asked.
"I'm perfectly fine," I said, crossing my arms.
"That's good. You were really pale earlier," he said. "You look a little better, though."
"Staz!"
Nero hurried out, carrying a drink in each hand. He had a look of alarm similar to his mother's.
He stopped next to Staz, handing him a drink and fixing him with a stern look. Staz seemed grateful to have something in his hands to play with, his fingers brushing up and down the sides of the cup.
"I told you to stay in the car," Nero said, voice as stern as his expression.
"I was talking to Jude," Staz said.
"I'm really sorry about him. I hope he didn't say anything mean," Nero said, hastily pushing Staz behind him.
"Not at all," I said.
And then, for a reason I couldn't explain, I thought of my grandmother. I thought of the way she took down of every picture of me that had been in her house. I thought of the way she'd try to distract anyone from seeing me if we happened to be together for a family event. I pictured the nasty looks she'd give me. I could almost hear her voice telling my mother to "get that damn boy right in the head" and to "fix that shameful faggot".
"You know," I said, my voice easy going. "It's pretty hot out today. Why did you leave Staz in the car like that? He didn't even have a window down or anything."
Nero blushed a little. "Uh, well, I just ran in quick to get the two of us drinks."
"Didn't even leave him the keys," I said, nodding at the keys poking out of Nero's pocket.
"He was fine!" Nero said hastily. "Right, Staz?"
"It was hot," Staz said, still playing with the cup in his hands.
Nero let out a nervous laugh. "He was fine, I was only gone for a few minutes. I had to pick him up because he stayed afterschool and didn't have his car today. So I offered to get us drinks!"
Staz looked up in confusion. "You said you wanted a coffee."
"And then I asked if you wanted anything," Nero said, looking like he was resisting the urge to smack his brother. Nero turned back to us and forced a smile. "We've got to head home."
He grabbed Staz's arm, ignoring Staz as he whined and tried to twist away. He tugged Staz towards the car, nearly causing him to spill his drink.
"Wait," I said.
Nero stopped, looking over his shoulder at me curiously. I crossed my arms and nodded at the still struggling Staz.
"He clearly doesn't like that," I said.
"He's weird about physical contact. Always has been, ever since he was little," Nero said, shrugging.
"I don't like your hand!" Staz whimpered.
"You don't like anyone's hand, Staz," Nero said impatiently. "I'm sorry we can't all be Dante. Now, get in the car." He released Staz's arm and gave him a light shove towards the car.
"Tatiana, can't you keep that damn faggot at home? We're trying to have a nice dinner and I don't want him here ruining it!"
My grandmother's words entered my mind and I raised an eyebrow at Nero. "Staz, don't get in the car. You're coming inside with me and Nate."
Nero looked alarmed. "No, no, he can't do that. I have to get him home."
"Why?" I asked, forcing myself to remain polite. Nero wasn't a freak like Staz; best not to piss him off too much. But I could taunt him just enough to let him know that his family was obvious. "Surely your parents would want Staz to get out for a little."
Staz looked up at Nero with a surprisingly sad look. "Is it because they're disappointed in me, too?"
Nero looked torn. "Staz...mom will want you home for dinner..."
"I'll bring him home," I said.
"I'll stay," Staz said.
Nero raked his hand through his hair. "Fine, fine. But you better get home for dinner."
He got in his car with an expression that said he knew he was going to regret this decision. I gestured at Staz to follow us and we went into the coffee shop.
"Jude," Nate hissed, keeping his voice low so Staz couldn't hear. "What the hell?"
"Don't doubt me now, Nathan," I said, stepping up to the counter. Nate and I ordered our drinks before leading Staz over to our usual table in the corner. We all sat down together, Staz excessively playing with the cup now.
Staz still had chalk all over him, smudged on his face worse than usual. He was getting traces of it on the cup as he nervously ran his fingers over it. God, did this kid always have to be doing something with his hands? It was annoying.
"Staz," I said.
He looked up at me. "Yea?"
"Nero seems like he's fairly good to you," I said. I wanted information on his family. I wanted to know who would care if he came home injured.
Staz dropped his gaze. "He just listens to mom and dad."
"Does he love you?" I asked.
Staz looked up again, furrowing his brows in confusion. "Love?"
"Yea, you know." I pointed at Nate. "Nate has an older brother. He loves his brother."
"That's debatable," Nate grumbled. "Have you freaking met Asher? He can be a total asshole sometimes."
Staz still seemed confused. "I don't..." He shook his head and pulled his hands away from the cup so he could press his thumbs into his palms.
"Freak," Nate mumbled.
"I drew you something," Staz said to me, surprising me.
"What? Why? I don't want your damn drawings," I said.
"You wanted to tear something. So I drew you a picture to tear." He gave a little smile. "I call it scatter art. I'll give it to you tomorrow."
"I don't want it," I repeated.
The smile dropped off his face. "Oh."
"He does want it, Staz," Nate said, kicking me under the table. "He's just joking."
"Oh," Staz said again, a touch of the smile coming back.
"Go grab me a napkin," I said to Staz.
He got up obediently and I glared at Nate as soon as he was out of earshot. Nate let out a sigh.
"Just listen," he said.
"What the hell?" I demanded.
"Listen!" He glanced over at Staz. "Look Jude, I don't know, it's different than anyone else we've ever targeted. I really think there's something...I don't know, wrong with him. It's not right. I don't feel right being so mean to him."
"You just called him a freak," I said.
"Well that's because your personality is rubbing off on me and sometimes I can't contain my inner asshole. I still don't feel right being mean to Staz. He doesn't seem to get it. He doesn't get that he's a victim. He really thinks he did something wrong," Nate said. "Just...Just think about being a little easier on him?"
He fell silent as Staz returned, setting down a little pile of napkins. He took one and began to play with it, his fingers rolling and unrolling the corners of it.
I wanted to ignore Nate, but he was rarely that sincere about letting someone off easy. He usually went along with me no matter what I did. He always had, ever since we were little kids. As much as I wanted to, I knew I wouldn't be able to just ignore what he'd said.
"You used to date Gideon Marchesane, right?" Staz said to me. "I have math with him. He's nice."
"Yea, well, he's not exactly my boyfriend anymore," I said, forcing my patience.
"Why not?" Staz asked.
"Because we broke up." My voice went flat. If I wasn't even going to tell my own parents the details of the breakup, I certainly wasn't going to tell Staz Montgomery.
"Him and his friends don't like you," Staz said, looking back down at the napkin as he rolled the corners again. "I heard them talking in class. They said you're evil."
"I am evil," I agreed. "But I don't really give a shit what his friends think of me."
Staz didn't respond to that and I felt annoyed at the awkward silence that settled over us. Why the hell had I invited him to sit with us? I wasn't learning anything useful that I could against him. This was a waste of time.
"Thanks for letting me sit here with you guys," he said, not looking up from his napkin. "No one ever asks me to sit with them. Or hang out with them."
"You have no friends?" Nate said.
Staz shrugged. "Some people are nice to me. I don't like talking to people. A lot of them just make fun of me."
"Probably because you're the most socially awkward person I've ever met in my life," I said, wincing as Nate kicked me under the table again.
Staz finally looked up. "I just don't understand what people say sometimes. I try to. Dante tried to teach me. But people say really confusing things. I don't get it and they make fun of me for not getting it."
"Yet you like art, which is the most confusing topic," I said.
He brightened up a little. "I love art. There's a lot of ways to interpret art. I like explaining things with colors. If I was going to give you a color, I'd say you were navy blue. It's a darker, powerful color, but it can also be used with lighter colors to balance out a picture."
"Fascinating," I said dryly. "Stop talking about colors."
He shut his mouth and nodded a little, dropping his gaze back to the napkin as he began to tear at it a little. Nate rolled his eyes at me.
"We've got to go, Staz," Nate lied. "Come on; I'll give you a ride home."
Staz got up and followed us out to Nate's car. He climbed into the backseat, thumb pressed into his palm. He stared out of the window silently.
"Where does he live?" Nate asked me.
I began to direct him towards Staz's house. Nate pulled into the driveway after a few minutes, putting the car in park. There were two men talking in the driveway, Staz's oldest brother and his father. They both looked over, Ian with an annoyed expression and Mr. Montgomery appearing ready to drag Staz out of the car by his hair.
They both walked over to the car and I rolled my window down. Mr. Montgomery forced a smile.
"Nero told us that you, uh, wanted to hang out with Staz a little. I hope he didn't do anything bad again. My wife told me about his little episode when you came to the house," Mr. Montgomery said.
"It was all fine," I said. They were so embarrassed of him that it was almost annoying.
"Staz, come on. Get out of the car. I'm sure Jude and his friend want to get going," Mr. Montgomery said.
"Staz, you know you're supposed to ask before you go off with anyone," Ian said in irritation.
"I asked Nero," Staz said, getting out of the car.
"Nero isn't your parent," Ian said.
"Alright, that's enough, Ian. No harm done," Mr. Montgomery said, pulling Staz away from the car. He instantly released Staz as Staz let out a whine and stepped away from him.
"Stop whining. You're not a damn child, Staz. Let's go inside." Ian grabbed Staz's arm and Staz whimpered, trying to tug away from his brother. "Cut it out. It's not like anyone is hurting you, Staz. Man up and deal with it." He forcefully tugged Staz at the house.
Mr. Montgomery blushed in embarrassment. "So sorry about that. Ian isn't in the best mood. Thank you for spending time with Staz."
I gave him my carefully crafted charming smile. "No problem, Mr. Montgomery."
Nate backed out of the driveway after we had said goodbye to Mr. Montgomery. He started driving towards his house, turning up the music in the car a little.
"Just think about what I said earlier," he said at last.
"Maybe." But sadly for me, I knew Nate's words would stay in my head every time I saw Staz.