"I can't believe you're drinking coffee in this heat."
I cradled my mug, trying to sit still while Marla and Kimi tied feathers in my hair. "I'm not human without coffee. And I need it. I'm so nervous."
"You do know caffeine is actually not good for nerves, right?" Sho pointed out. "I could make you some tea instead."
"It works for me," I insisted, hugging my mug protectively.
"Psychosomatic dependency?" Christa tsked. "Are we going to have to report that to the captain?"
For once she spoke without much rancor. After all, our mission was going so well, it was almost perfect. We'd returned to the hab after the first meeting to find Diver's drone waiting for us, weighted down by a container full of medium-sized, melon-like fruit. It appeared to be a favorite of the tribe, but didn't grow locally, so they always appreciated being able to have it. Their gratitude had been such that it wasn't long before we learned the names of our escorts. Of course, we stood no chance of pronouncing them in the Psittacans' own language, but we were at least able to get the gist.
The green male who always seemed to take the lead was called Many Kills. He offered no explanation for that name, and none of us seemed inclined to ask. The green female was Day Dawns Red, because, as she informed us, she had been born as a red rising sun broke above the horizon, cementing her destiny as a warrior of the tribe. The yellow male was called Swifter Than Lightning and indeed, he moved even faster than the others; there'd be no escaping him if we got ourselves in trouble. And the darkly colored male introduced himself as Silence In The Night. Once again, we didn't ask.
It wasn't until after the third gift—a cache of fresh fish that was another hard-to-get favorite among the tribe—that the yellow female finally gave us her name.
"Shadows Beneath Sunlight," she had told us grudgingly.
"That's...an interesting name," I'd replied, trying to figure out how to ask her about it in more detail.
"You want to know where it came from."
"Well..."
"Sunlight picked it herself," Many Kills filled us in. "Didn't you, Sunlight?"
She'd turned to look at him, her crest rising in clear annoyance. "Yes, I did." One clawed toe tapped the branch beneath her feet, gouging a small hole in the bark. "When I was young. I was too pretty. The tribe believed my destiny was to be a mate, not a warrior. But I proved them wrong." She'd snapped her beak in pride.
I'd glanced at Lightning, who was dodging around tree trunks and careening wildly ahead of us, bored with our sedate pace. "What about him? I mean, if he'd been too pretty, would they expect him to forgo being a warrior, too?"
"Of course." All four of the other Psittacans stared at me in bemusement, or perhaps astonishment. "Beauty is beauty."
I'd filed that interesting bit away for later and left it at that. Sunlight didn't seem to care much for talking about her past, and I could relate to that all too well.
The fourth day we brought something that I was uneasy about: weapons. They were older tech, long metal staves that could extend a sharp spearhead from one end. Of course, they could also fire from the other end, both stun rounds and lethal ones. Diver had sworn he'd removed the parts necessary for the weapons to fire, but I was still uncertain about it. We chose five and presented them to Many Kills and the others. They were so pleased with their shiny metal spears that I breathed a little easier. A very little.
But today...today was the worst. The heat was the most punishing it had been yet, but I desperately needed the comfort of my coffee. I'd chosen this gift all on my own. It was the last, and the very most important, and I'd thought I had to pick it by myself if I was really going to prove that I belonged aboard the Carpathia. Now...Maybe I should've gotten help. From Kirrick, at the very least. The Xeno-liaisons team had been hesitant about my choice, but not against it, and until this moment that had been enough.
"Xan?"
The voice in my ear was Diver's. I glanced back at him.
"You've got this," he said, resting a hand briefly on my shoulder. "I know you do."
I felt a lot less certain. But I swallowed the rest of my coffee and rose to put the mug in the safety of the hab; we'd found out the hard way that our Psittacan friends liked to make off with anything shiny we left lying around outside. They might be interested in us, but that didn't keep them from watching us continually.
"Are we ready?" Marla asked, as I stepped back out of the hab.
"No," I answered honestly. "But since I doubt I'll ever be ready, we might as well go."
"Sure you don't want that tea?" Sho asked, with a reassuring smile.
"The last thing I need while surrounded by that many enormous, sharp beaks is a full bladder, but thanks."
Christa made her usual sound of disgust, but everyone else laughed. I glanced around at them, puzzled as to what was so funny about what I'd said. After a moment, I shrugged. This wasn't the first time I'd experienced this phenomenon and it was unlikely to be the last. And judging based on the clacking from the jungle around us, the Psittacans were just as amused. Well, maybe I should take that as a good sign. Sadly, it did nothing to settle my nerves.
*****
Once again I stood before the platform where Completes The Whole, the leader of this tribe, dwelled. Every Psittacan of reasonable age had found a spot to watch from; some of them were even up in branches above, gazing down at us. I clutched the heavy roll of fabric I carried, trying not to let my nerves show, or let it be seen that the weight of this final present was almost too much for me to handle. I'd been getting stronger and stronger since leaving Wraith, but man, this thing was heavy.
"I see they have returned," Completes The Whole said, just as he had every other day. "But I wonder, are they worthy to stay?"
"We would prove ourselves, if we may," I replied, holding out the fabric. "Please, accept this gift as a sign of our worthiness."
Completes The Whole gestured, and several other Psittacans came forward to ease the bundle from my arms. Working together they unrolled it, revealing a long stretch of tarp. Looking at it now, I realized Kiri must've had a hand in it. This sort of material didn't normally come in this iridescent shimmer, but she would've been able to make it.
Even with the canopy above, the shifting hues of green, blue, purple and gold showed clearly with each little tremor of the tarp. This would, if he liked it, take the place of his old tarp. No other leader—no other person of any sort—among the Psittacans would have this, not for a long while. A status symbol, that was what I'd been going for, something Completes The Whole could have great pride in. Now I waited to see what he thought, and my stomach churned with nerves. No one was moving or making a sound.
All of a sudden Completes The Whole let out a raucous cry. The Psittacans holding the tarp raised it triumphantly, and all around us rang joyful ululations. Oh, Sweet Mother Universe. I pressed a hand to my chest, over my thumping heart. I think we did it. I glanced at my companions and found them grinning. Diver wore the biggest grin of all, and he gave me a thumbs up when I caught his eye. I'd really done it.
"You show yourselves worthy indeed," Completes The Whole said, when the noise had died down. "Be welcome among my people, visitors."
"Thank you," I replied.
"Now, while it is true that I've not seen all this world has to offer, I'm certain I'd have heard of you before. Especially since you look so much like monkeys."
Hoo boy. I doubted he meant actual monkeys, but probably something alike enough that that was the word the translator supplied. I'd have to look into that as soon as possible.
"So where are you from, visitors?"
"Many different places," Christa answered. "We've come on behalf of the Starsystems Alliance. We," she gestured at our small group, "are called humans, but there are other species in the Alliance as well."
"I knew it!" The burst of words came from Many Kills. "Haven't I always said there had to be other worlds and peoples out there?"
Next to him, Day Dawns Red gave her crest a quick flick. "Yes, yes. Now hush. I want to hear this."
"Fascinating." Completes The Whole cocked his head in interest. "And what is it that you wish with us? Trade? Alliance?"
"That depends on what you want," I said quickly, before Christa could speak again. "There's much for us to discuss. Far more than we could possibly cover in a single sitting. We hope we can spend time here, learn more about your people and the other people of this planet."
Completes The Whole bobbed his head in agreement. "There can be no good alliance between people who don't understand one another."
Well, I guess we're on the same page, mostly. There was no guarantee, even with the approval of Completes The Whole's tribe, that we would leave Psittaca with an alliance, or even a trade agreement. It would take work and time, and would require the cooperation of most of the tribes on the planet, however many that was. Though...when I glanced at Many Kills, I saw a gleam in his eyes. He wanted to know more, and I had a feeling he'd find a way, no matter what it took.
"Tell me your name, little visitor," Completes The Whole said. "You are the leader, yes?"
Christa opened her mouth to protest, but fortunately Marla was quick with her elbow. Ignoring Christa's grunt of outrage as Marla caught her in the ribs, I answered, "I'm the leader of this mission, at the very least. And my name is Xandri. Xandri Corelel."
All around us, feathers rustled. Psittacans exchanged looks that were still unreadable to me. Many Kills stared at me, his crest partway up.
"What does it mean?"
"What does what—oh! My name? It...well, it doesn't." That rustle sounded again, and I realized it was similar to a gasp of surprise. "I mean, some human names have meanings, but mine...doesn't." I wasn't about to tell them the meaning of my full name. Or that I had a full name. "Different people give names in different ways."
"I see," Completes The Whole murmured. "There is much for us to learn of each other, then. But not tonight. Tonight is for celebrating!"
The tribe cheered in response. This, too, we had seen with Diver's drones; they'd held such a celebration for the smaller Psittacan that had visited them. But I held no illusions that all Psittacans would have welcomed us this way. We'd chosen a good tribe to start with: prosperous, cheerful, and welcoming. Yet we knew from what we'd seen that Psittacans dominated this planet, and we had only seen the largest ones, for the most part. There appeared to be no world government; we'd be up against a hell of a lot of different ways of life. One step at a time, Xan. Start here.
"You will join us, of course," Completes The Whole said, and it was just shy of a command.
"We would be honored. Though..." I hesitated. "I'm not sure we can safely eat your food."
"Then you may return to your camp and bring your own, so that you won't be left out. Oh, and one other thing." He lifted a wing-arm and pointed at me. "There's no need for those silly things in your fur. You 'humans' look plucked enough as it is. That just makes it worse."
My cheeks burned, and grew all the hotter as Christa muffled some giggles. "Right. I'll uh, get rid of them."
"It's not that we don't appreciate the effort, it just makes it hard to take you seriously."
I nodded, unable to speak in my mortification. All this time I'd been wearing these space-fried things because Christa had insisted so strenuously, and now here she was, laughing at me. I wanted to bolt, to run all the way back to camp, get on the shuttle, and demand the pilot take me back to Carpathia. Only the sensation of Diver's touch, as his fingers closed gently around my wrist, kept me in place. I took a deep breath, trying to regain my composure.
"We'll...we'll return shortly," I said. "We looked forward to the celebrations."
I turned, risking rudeness, because if I stood here any longer I might cry from the sheer humiliation I felt. The crowd of Psittacans parted to let me through; I tried not to wonder how many of them had been laughing at me and these damn feathers all this time.
I walked briskly, but Diver kept stride with me easily. The Xeno-liaisons team soon caught up, and behind us trailed Many Kills and his four companions. God, I just want to be alone right now. And instead I'd have to find the effort to smile through the celebrating, through the noise and god only knew what else. Damnit, I'd been doing so well down here. I'd hardly even needed my ribbon. But now I wished I could pull it out and run it through my fingers without having to worry about what Christa might say.
Speak of the devil. "Can you believe he called us monkeys?" Christa said, keeping her voice low so it wouldn't carry to the Psittacans behind us.
"Well, some of us certainly ain't risen above the chimps," Diver responded, shooting her a dirty look.
She gaped at him in outrage, then started to sputter as she searched for a response. It might've been petty of me, but I took inordinate amounts of pleasure in the fact that no one else came to her defense.