Don't you understand?
You're tearing me apart.
I've tried to hold up this paper thin facade you want everyone to believe.
Its hard, you know?
I'm not the person I use to be.
You make me want to cry.
You make me want to die.
You're killing me, you know?
You keep telling me these words of hope but they're like the wind, they come and go so remembering them is useless and forgetting them is hopeless.
I'm fading, don't you see?
My skin is so thin, you can point out my veins, that's how you get in.. I see this now. Injecting yourself into my bloodstream and sedating me. Keeping me quiet and euphoric throughout it all.
The tears have stopped, have you noticed?
I suppose you have. I suppose everyone has, since no one thinks they're hurting me anymore. Everyone around me, ugh they feel like vipers. Sticking me and pricking me and poisoning me and just because my skin closes quickly doesn't mean the poison doesn't sting.
My voice cracks, but maybe its unnoticeable?
I'd never cry in front of you, I don't want you seeing me this way. I feel sickly and insecure, I'm glad you never talk to me anymore. I'm glad hardly people chat me.. But even then, I think I'm unhappy because I'm so alone. I don't know how much more I can take, its so hard to breath, and so hard to eat.
I've stopped eating, can you tell?
I'm prettier, am I not? You always said you didn't like when ate so much, but you said you didn't like when I ate so little.
I don't know if I'll be able to continue much longer with this facade, and I'm sorry my darling. I know you'll be mad.