Bella was reading a book, leaning with her back against Edward's chest. He was reading with her over her shoulder. He drew in her scent. He couldn't believe that he once thought of her as food. He was so used to her scent now. His vampire reactions to it were all but eliminated. He understood Carlisle. You could get completely desensitized by a smell. Jasper walked in and smiled. He felt the peaceful serenity that came from them. Bella looked up from her book.
'Jazz!' She yelled excited and ran towards him.
'I have a question about my book and it is exactly your area of expertise.'
Edward, don't teach her to talk like that. She sounds like a grown-up.
'I didn't. She gets that from Carlisle.' Edward answered.
Jasper shuffled his hand through her hair.
'Tell me all about it.' He encouraged.
'It's about a girl and she is really sad, because her father left her and her mommy.'
What kind of book are you letting her read!
'She handpicked it herself.' Edward answered sharply.
'I understand why she is sad about that,' Bella continued, 'but then she gets really angry with her mommy.'
Her eyes were big with the mystery.
'If your mother is the one who stays then you shouldn't be angry at her, should you?'
Really Edward! As if she doesn't grow up fast enough without these kind of books.
He growled at Jasper.
Jasper just smiled in return and swept Bella from the floor.
'Emotions aren't always rational. Sometimes you blame the person that isn't really the one to blame.' Jasper explained.
'That's the explanation you come up with?' Edward asked sarcastically. 'Look who's talking!'
It was Jasper's turn to growl at Edward.
Okay, okay. I will do better.
'The girl can't accept that her father left and she fears it is because of her. To protect herself from this guilt, she turns to the only other source available, her mother. If it is her mother's fault the father left, it can't be her fault. Do you understand?'
Bella bit her lower lip in concentration.
'I guess so, but it still seems silly. She should blame her father for leaving and not her mommy or herself. It is obviously hard for her mother too.'
Unbelievable! She learns more from one book than some people learn in a lifetime and we are talking to a five-year-old.
'Well, to be fair, she is almost six.' Edward said jokingly.
Jasper laughed.
'Will you read the rest of the book with me, Jazz? I might have more questions.'
'Of course.'
They settled down on the couch next to Edward. It was kind of Jasper and Bella's thing. They were both addicted to books, just as Edward was addicted to music. Since her last dream of Esme's past a few months ago, Bella didn't have a new dream. She also didn't display any of her abilities in public anymore. Alice guided her very intensely in that department and Edward watched over the thoughts of Bella's teacher carefully. So far they were good. It had been peaceful months and Edward loved those times. Bella grew amazingly fast intellectually, probably the product of her own intelligence and of having seven knowledgeable teachers.
'Read this, Jazz. She says the following to her mommy: "I wish you had left and not dad."' She furrowed her brow disapprovingly. 'Doesn't she understand she hurts her mother's feelings by saying that?'
Her empathy is amazing. She would never hurt someone in such a way.
Edward nodded proudly. Bella was good to the core.
'She knows it is wrong, but she is not thinking straight.' Jasper explained. 'People sometimes say things they regret later when they are angry.'
'You never do that.' Bella said convinced.
Edward smiled. They were never angry with Bella and when they were angry at each other it always went by Bella unnoticed.
'That is not true, Bella. We are not that different from humans. Sometimes we make mistakes.'
She wrinkled her nose as if she doubted that. Jasper laughed while he touched her nose and Edward smiled again. His brother had changed, like all of them had done since Bella's presence in the family. Jasper was less serious and laughed more. The scars of his past became less and less noticeable. They read and talked on until Emmett came in.
'I had to come and stop you two.' He winked at Bella. 'You are a very bad influence on my girl. Come on, Bella, let's play football in the garden.'
'Did you forget what happened the last time you played football?' Edward asked sceptically.
Oh crap.
Emmett was very good in causing some kind of catastrophe when he played with Bella.
'Esme will understand. It is to save Bella from boredom.' Bella laughed when Emmett winked at her again.
'Who is going to play with us?' She asked.
'We will play against these two losers here.' Emmett answered with a wicked smile.
Edward made a face, but chuckled when he heard Jasper's thoughts.
That cheat! He knows we will let Bella win.
'Come on! Come on! We are losing daylight, bros.' Emmett said, while he walked outside.
Bella ran after Emmett excited. Edward and Jasper followed as lambs going to the slaughter.
When they were done playing, Bella fell on the couch exhausted and Jasper fell next to her. Edward laughed. It was a good thing they had Emmett to balance out the seriousness in their family. A child needed to play and they had managed to keep anything from breaking this time.
Alice suddenly came rushing into the room. She came to a stop right in front of Jasper and Bella.
'Hi Alice.' Bella greeted.
'Hi sweetie.' Alice answered. 'Did you enjoy the game?'
In the meantime she conversed with Jasper, Emmett and Edward on a different level.
'She will have another dream tonight, a very tough one.'
'Whose past?' Edward asked immediately.
Her eyes went to Jasper and Edward heard her answer in her mind before she spoke the words.
'Jasper's past.'
Jasper's eyes flew open and he pulled Bella in an embrace protectively.
No!
Edward knew that Jasper was just as afraid of Bella experiencing his past as Edward was of his, although for different reasons. Jasper's past held only death, pain, violence and hopelessness. It were all the characteristics of war.
Jasper held Bella close to his body as if that could protect her from himself. Edward watched her closely. Her eyes were calm, there were no traces of fear.
'Yes, very much. Emmett and I won.' She answered Alice's question with a smile.
Did she understand what was going to happen? It should be difficult not only to experience the horrors of other people's past, but also to know when it was hanging over your head. They didn't have such an early warning before.
'Maybe we should keep her awake?' Jasper suggested, knowing it was pointless.
'It won't work.' Alice said softly, concern in her voice. 'She will still fall asleep.'
Edward saw the same visions Alice saw. Whatever they tried it always ended with Bella falling asleep and having the dream. It was indeed going to be a very hard dream and he was at least relieved that she was going to wake up to call for Jasper. Rosalie joined them.
'I heard what is going on and called Carlisle. He has the night shift, but is switching his shift with another doctor right now.'
Esme came running in after Rose. Her face was a mask of frustration and concern. Bella's dreams were taking a toll out of the whole family. It was hard to have to stand idly by when the girl they all loved was going to get hurt. They hovered around her anxiously, handling her as a bomb about to explode, until Alice called them to order.
'We can't act like this. It is just going to make it worse. We have to act normally.' She gave them a stern look. 'This is hurting her.'
Alice is right. Esme
Easy for you to say. You are not the one whose past is going to haunt her tonight.Jasper
Maybe I should play with her some more. Break the tension. Emmett
Act naturally. I can do that. Rosalie
Edward sighed, but knew Alice was right. They had to try. They went on with the day normally, pretending not to know the impending doom that hung over Bella's head.
He felt teeth sink in the skin of his arm. He turned around quickly, protecting the use of his arm. With a quick bite, he disposed of one of his three opponents. He had hardly time to think, before he had to counter another attack from the other two. He glanced around him. There were not many of his fellow combatants left. They were going to lose. He realized he had to retreat. He was an amazing fighter but even he couldn't win against so many. Another set of teeth bit him in his shoulder. He didn't really feel the pain. It drowned in the feelings of victory and hate of his enemies. If he didn't act now they were all lost. He quickly gave the sign for retreat to the only four that were left around him. During their run they lost another one. He hardly gave it a thought, focussing on his escape. They lost the city and their army. On their base, he faced the woman that was his leader.
'What happened?' She asked coldly.
'We lost the city. We have to fall back to Monterrey.'
'How many are left?'
'Only three. There were too many of them and they were well trained.'
She nodded thoughtfully.
'Dispose of them. We leave as soon as you're done and start over.'
'As you wish, ma'am.'
He walked away, but felt familiar feelings, coming from himself. The three that were left meant nothing to him, but he still felt averse to disposing them. They had survived against the odds and now he was going to end their lives himself.
He called the first one to him and looked him in the eyes. The young vampire felt fear and respect. They all feared and respected him. He had proved them many times that he was a force to be reckoned with. Not a single one of them, even with their superior strength, could challenge him. This knowledge used to please him, the way they feared him, but he could feel no pleasure anymore. He braced himself for his painful task. He would make it quick, not out of pity for his comrade, but because he couldn't stand the overwhelming emotions of pain and fear anymore. The young one bowed before him submissively and he took his chance. Within seconds he had dismantled him. He called in the next one with a sigh. Was his life ever going to change? He flinched away from the prospect of beginning this endless circle of death and pain over again. He wanted, no he yearned for a change. Something, anything that could break this everlasting war. He had no faith in anything anymore. Not in his pride or in his skills.
'Are you done?' His leader asked, joining him in the room.
'Yes.'
'I got a tip that the Volturi are coming for a visit again. We have to leave soon.'
He sighed. The Volturi meant more death and a new opening for her to gain more power. Suddenly his depression overwhelmed him. He felt himself drown. He desperately searched for some string to hold onto. There was nothing. He suddenly caught himself thinking about ways to end his life, to give up and say goodbye to everything. This last opening, gave him more relief than he would have expected. He saw the end of his existence coming dangerously close. Maybe he could stop, just stop.
'Bella is going to wake up in one minute.' Alice assured Jasper softly.
Jasper didn't respond. His look was focussing only on Bella. His face filled with pain. Through Bella, he could feel everything he felt at that time long ago. He relived his past in a way that could have made Edward feel immensely sorry for him if he wasn't already filled with concern for Bella. This was a cruel twist to Jasper's gift. Living through his depression and pain once was bad enough and now he had to go through it again, for Bella's sake.
Carlisle had given Bella another shot of Valium, which he held in stock for cases like this. Her heart rate had gone through the roof again.
'No Jasper, please don't.' Bella whimpered through her dreamy state.
That did it for Jasper. He stirred suddenly, looking up at them.
'Leave me alone with her.' He ordered.
'Me too?' Alice asked hurt.
'Yes I am sorry. I need to conquer this together with Bella. There is nothing you can do.'
Edward left the room last, not knowing if he could face it when it was going to be his turn.
So did you guys have fun reading. I'm so happy because there are 1k readers. Thank you all so much. Hope you enjoy as much as I do. Please vote and comment if you want more update soon. Goodbye and thanks.
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