"Hey Rem, I never asked. Did you ever ask Flitwick about Legilimency?" Joel asks.
It's only been three days after I found out about Joy and Malfoy. No matter how many times I say, "Oh it'll be okay, my best friend kissed someone thats good right?" But then I remember that it is my sworn enemy and I just want to punch someone.
"Rem? Hello?"
"What?!" I snap out of my thought.
"Did you ever talk to Flitwick about Legilimency?" He asks again.
"What? Oh, no... Sorry." I say quietly.
"Alright, whats up?" He asks as he puts his book down. We're sitting next to the window in Ravenclaw tower again.
"I," I began, "I shouldn't tell you...."
"Rem who else are you going to tell? Clover?" He asks.
"I can't tell anyone." I say glaring at him.
"Why not?" He asks, "Is it something you saw?"
"Yes. Something I should've never seen...." I confess.
"Oh..." He says quietly. "Well, who's memory was it?"
"I can't tell you-"
"Wait it wasn't mine was it?" He asks this time with more concern.
"No, Joel, I try not to look you in the eye so it doesn't-"
Just as I'm saying this my eyes meet his and I saw what looks like a muggle school. Well from what I've seen in pictures in Muggle Studies. Joel is walking down a hallway in the school alone. Then someone in the hallway put their foot out and he fell, "Watch where you're going, freak!" With that Joel stood and slowly approached the boy who tripped him. "I'd be more careful of where you put your feet, Sasquatch."
"Rem? Rem! Damn it what did you see?!" The real Joel says. I feel his arms shaking me softly. I blink a few times and shake my head.
"Sorry, nothing."
"What did you see? Don't tell me you didn't see anything you were staring at me for ten seconds," he says with a lot of concern in his voice.
"But I didn't-"
"Stop lying to me! I'm your friend, you should be able to trust me!" He says, "Just tell me."
"You were bullied in a Muggle school. Thats it." I say calmly. He grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the seat. "Where are we going?" I ask as he pulls me along the common room.
"You're seeing Flitwick, now." Joel says. We approach a birch wood door with white marble pillars on either side. He knocks and the door opens. "Go on. Please get this sorted out."
"Alright fine, but did you ever think that I enjoy seeing into peoples minds?" I ask before I step in his office. Before Joel has a chance to respond, the door shuts behind me.
"Hello?" I ask casually. "Professor I have something I need to talk about."
"Miss Mannings?" A squeaky voice says coming out from behind a book shelf. "Oh what's wrong, please have a seat."
I approach the desk in the middle of the room. The wood is almost white and the chairs are almost like the ones in the common room only closer to the ground. The curtains in the room were also midnight blue with bronze embroidery on them. I sit across the desk and he sits in his chair on the other side.
"Well, its sort of complicated..." I start when he nods my way, "but I suppose I'll just come out with it. Have you encountered a certain magic called Legilimency?"
"Oh! Lovely. No ones asked that for quite a few years." He says in his squeaky voice. "Yes I have. A rather tricky magic really."
"Well, I spoke with Professor Trelawney and she told me a few small things about it. Well, only that its not normal for people to be able to see into someones eyes and see parts of them."
"Indeed yes that isn't usually how it works." He explains folding his little hands on his desk, "That's more common with the 'natural' Legilimists. It can be learned but it is difficult to achieve. The counter of Legilimemcy is called Occlumency."
"Occlumency?" I ask with curiosity.
"When you put a shield around your mind, basically, preventing a Legilimist from penetrating that persons mind." He explains.
"Professor, would you happen to have any books about this? Or is there a class I can take?" I ask earnestly.
"We don't teach this art here at Hogwarts." He says, "Legilimency is a major invasion of a persons privacy. In order to teach Occlumency, Legilimency is the easiest method of teaching and is the most effective. I have books though. Sadly I can't lend them to students." He says, "Sorry."
I sigh. "Professor, I'm a natural born Legilimist. I've seen into the minds of my friends and enemies and I have no idea how to control it."
There's a small moment of silence.
"May I see your wand?" He asks.
I pull out my wand and place it on his desk. He picks it up and examines it.
"Professor I don't understand what my wand has to do with this." I ask cynically.
"You came to me remember?" He says with a light smile. "Elegant design... Core?"
"Unicorn hair." I answer.
"Wood?"
"Silver Lime. But what does that have to do with anything, Sir?"
"Silver Lime. No wonder. One of the only wand woods that is excellent for Legilimency and Occlumency." He says placing my wand on the desk in front of me. I put it back and turned to face him.
"This wood is extremely uncommon so take care of it." He warned. Then he pulled out his wand and pointed to a book on the shelf.
"Accio!" He says and a silver book with purple binding flew off the shelf and landed in his hand. "Take this and tell no one that you have it." He says. I look down at the cover and in Silver writing it says, "Legilimency and Occlumency- A beginners guide."
"This should help you to control it." He says quickly. "If you have any questions, talk to me."
"Thank you, Professor. Thank you very much." I say as I stand up to leave.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A few weeks passed and its nearer to the Ball. Right now I'm in the library, alone, reading the third edition of "Legilimency and Occlumency." Sadly I had to return the first two to Flitwick, but I was able to take notes. I haven't seen into someone's mind since the middle of the second book.
"Hey Rem." Joy says next to me. I pause and look up to her with a neutral look on my face. We still aren't on speaking terms.
"Hi, Joy." I say quietly.
"What're you reading?" She says trying to make conversation.
"I uh, sorry. I can't tell you." I say honestly. "Flitwick told me that I can't tell anyone that-"
"Rem I'm sorry about Malfoy." She says suddenly, "I don't know what happened and I didn't want it to happen-"
"At first." I mutter under my breath.
"-and I know he's your worst enemy and I-" she says quickly.
"Joy, its okay." I say cutting her off for the second time. "It was wrong of me to be so upset with you so I'm sorry about that."
"It's okay." She says.
We just sat there in silence for a little while. I had dove back into my book and so did Joy. I look up after a while as ask, "So who are you taking to the Ball?"
"You remember Demitri?" She asks. "He asked me a while ago but I said yes."
"Oh lovely." I say.
"And you're still going with Joel?"
"Yeah." I answer.
*****************************************
A few days had passed and it was another one of our Hogsmead days. Normally I'd stay back with Joel or I'd just stay behind alone. But Rose and Dana explained that Joy needed a girls day, what ever that is, and that I should go too. Joel spent today with his friends out in Hogsmeade to get dress robes.
"So why exactly does she need a girls day?" I ask Rose while we wait for Joy.
"She didn't tell you?" Dana asks suddenly.
"Tell me what?" I ask.
"Well," Rose leaned in closer, "Last night she got an owl from that Malfoy boy and he said to meet her at the Astronomy Tower."
"What?! She didn't go, did she?!" I ask completely shocked.
"She did and she came back crying! We asked her what happened and she said that he asked her to the ball and she had to say no because Demitri, you know Demitri, right? Well he asked her earlier and she said she'd have to think about it because she was waiting for Malfoy to ask and when Draco waited to long she agreed to go with Demitri." Rose whispers.
"So he was upset with her and he just left her. Then she came back and Demitri was waiting for her and he asked what was wrong and she just pushed him away and crashed on the bed." Dana says with sympathy.
"So we woke her up later and asked what happened and thats when she told us everything." Rose says.
I just sat there stunned. She obviously listens well... I look down at my empty plate and rest my head on my hands. I shake my head slowly and sighed. "Are you alright?" Dana asks.
"No." I say sternly. "Don't tell her that I said that. I'll get over it later."
"Oh..." Rose and Dana say together.
Joy came over to sit with us. I turned my face away from her and detatched myself from their conversation. How could she do that to me? How could she even think to do that to me? My best friend is hooking up with my worst enemy and feels bad for rejecting him to a stupid ball. How the hell could she do that?
I don't want to see her right now. I should just go to my dorm and shut myself up for the weekend. But I just can't. I don't know how badly this hurts her, but I think that a girls day, whatever the hell that is will do us all some good. Besides, Joel is out in Hogsmeade as well. We eventually get going. Rose and Dana are doing their best to keep up the mood and I could tell that Joy wants to be happy for them, but is still saddened by that prat's rejection of her. I'm walking behind them thinking. Whenever Joy asked me what was wrong, I faked a smile and said "Oh, I'm just tierd, that's all."
We walked into the dress shop and Rose and Dana were picking dresses off the racks and were piling them on Joy. I just sat in the corner and looked at all the selections. I thought it was best not to sulk about Joy too much. I'll just run up to my room and cry about it later. Then I think I'll send Bliss to give a letter to my parents while I'm at it!
The dresses in this shop were pretty extravagent, if I do say so. They're long and made of really expensive material that seemed to be uncomfortable. Sounds like a lovely evening to be wearing that stuff... I'm not particularly in the mood to try on anything so I just looked at some of the dresses as I sat here.
Joy came out in selection number one. It was really..... Bright. Silvery and poofy.... Whose idea was that monstrosity?!
"No." I said under my breath. No one heard me, but thank god they sent her out of it too.
The second dress was definately an improvement. She looked really nice in it. It's rich red colour brought out her eyes beautifully. Although, she seemed pretty uncomfortable in it. She steped out and put on a different one.
She tried on the rest of the dresses and sat down defeated. None of them she liked very well.
"Thats it, I'm done." Joy says putting her head in her hands.
"Joy."
"What?"
"Joy," Dana's voice grew louder even making me look up. "What!?" "JOY!" Dana shouts.
"For Gods sakes Dana, WHAT!?" She looked up and saw the light purple dress. She smiled widely and stood up. When she tried it on, she seemed so happy. She paid for it and watched Dana as she tried on her dresses. She only got through two until she found it. I suppose after Rose, I'll be next... I really don't want to try anything on.
So I stood and said, "I have to use the little witches room." They nodded and I left to look for a nice dress. I went to the darker clothes. I suppose that's not very strange for me. I always wore clothes that reflected my personality. Even though I'm a fairly happy person, I'm just drawn to black. The colour just seems to suit me better. Purple and Blue sometimes, but it's always been black. Bright colours just don't seem to work well on me. People say that I'd look funny in those colours, but I really love them. But I suppose, they just aren't for me. After a few minutes of looking through the racks, I found a dress.
It had off the shoulder long sleeves that were black satin. The under layer of the dress was a very bright voilet and over that was black flowered lace. There was a sash around the waist that was a deep purple. I pulled it off the rack and took it to the register.
"You don't want to try it on?" the clerk asks me.
"No." I say plainly. I pulled out my Galleons and she bagged up the dress. I came back to Joy and the others and Rose was in a Navy dress with a silver belt around the waist.
"I think I found it!" She squeeled.
"Oh I'm so happy!" Dana says as she hugged her.
"Now it's Rem's turn." Rose says as she looks in my direction.
"Oh, I already found one." I explain.
"Oh! Try it on! Show us!" Dana says.
"No." I say trying to find an excuse not to try it on. "I, uhhh... I want it to be a surprise."
"Oh okay! Oooo Rem! I can't wait!" Rose says. I fake a smile. Rose pays for her dress and we walk out of the store.
We pay a visit to the Three Broomsticks and have some Butterbeer before we head back to Hogwarts. By the time we get back it's almost dinner, but I didn't feel like eating. So when we got to the staircase that led to Ravenclaw Tower, I thanked them for the wonderful time, and promised myself that I'd thank them for putting up with me and ran up the stairs.
Once I made it to the door, my mind had already been wondering about. My head was aching so badly, I felt as if it's implode.
"Rare I am but some of me become part of some. My sadness brings healing and when I die, it's just my beginning. What am I?" The knocker says in it's mystical voice.
"Pheonix, stop being so obvious." I sneer.
The door opens and I rush in.
"Hi, Rem." Joel greets me. I pass by him quickly and rush into the dorm. Clover is sitting on her bed reading a book. She looks up at me and smiles.
"Hello, Remedy." she says happily.
"Not now, sorry." I say as I search for the last book Flitwick gave me. I took some parchment and a quill and some ink and I hastily walked out of the dorm. I looked down at my feet and passed Joel again.
"I'll be up when you come back, be careful." I heard him say quietly as I pass. I freeze in my tracks.
"Hi." I say sadly. Then I continue to the door.
************************************************************
I run out into the courtyard and sit under a tree. I open my book and dive into the information. Every so often, I'll jot down afew things that I shold use as a reference.
The sun is starting to set, so I set my book aside and lean my head against the tree. What the hell does she see in the stupid Slytherin.... There is nothing good about him. He's trying to kill me because all he wants to do is please that devil that he calls his father.I'll bet this is all part of his stupid plan. He's just using her to get to me. She needs to stay out of this whole situation, it's omly for her own good! If she doesn't she'll die. I don't even want to be involved with that Malfoy prat, hell, I practically grew up with him and I still hate him, so what the hell does she see in him! She doesn't even like him! She doesnt even know him!
"Sleeping, are we?" I hear an annoying voice call from across the tree that I'm sitting at. Malfoy is striding towards me with that stupid arogant smirk of his plastered on his face.
"Please." I beg, "Leave me alone."
"And why should I?" He says looking down on me.
"Why won't you stand? You think your'e too good to stand, Blood Traitor?"
"Stop." I say more to myself then to him.
"What's this rubbish you're reading, Blood Traitor?" he says bending down to grab the book that's next to me. I slam my hand down on the book beore he could get to it.
"I'm not in the mood." I say looking up to his eyes. They met and this time, I purposefully rake out his emotions. He's sad. Hurt. Rejected. The whites of his normally stormy grey eyes are a faint red. "It seems that I'm not the only one either." I say as I break contact. Is he actually sad by Joy's rejection?
"Shut up, freak!" he spat out at me.
"Sod off, Malfoy." Harry says coming out of no where. I turn around to see him come out from behind the tree. I have no idea how the hell he got there but I'm really happy that he's here.
"Oh look, it's perfect Potter here to save his silly little girlfriend!" Malfoy sneers and Harry. The Gryffindor just bent down to my level.
"Rem, are you alright?" he asks softly.
"Yeah." I nod.
"Ugh! I'm going to be ill." Malfoy says as he steps back. He leaves and Harry and I are just sitting here in silence. My head is still bowed, so he put an arm around my shoulders.
"It's okay Rem, remember it's only Malfoy." Harry says.
"I know. I've already been having an annoying day and he just doesn't know how to take a hint that I just..." I sighed and looked down again.
"Oh. Well I guess I should ask you later..." Harry says awkwardly. I look up at him.
"Ask me what?"
"Well... uhmmm.... Maybe.. No, no this is just.... Nevermind. It's a bad time for you, it wouldn't be right to ask you now. "
"For God's sakes Harry just spit it out." I demand.
"Could you come with me to the ball?" he asks rather quickly.
"Uhmm. Harry, I'm sorry but-"
"No, okay I'm sorry or asking." He says nervously. "No, it's fine, it's just that I'm going with Joel. Thats all." I explain. "Besides, I don't think you'd want me to go with you anyway."
"What? No, that's not true." he says. His cheeks are becoming redder. "That's so rediculous."
"Anyway, how did you know where I'd be?" I ask ignoring his last comment.
"I went looking for you and I found Joel insted. He was sitting with another girl and I asked where you went. He said to try out here and he told me you were upset." Harry explains. "I was going to leave you alone, but then I niticed that Malfoy was gone to I had to make sure you were alright."
"Oh." I say plainly. "I'm glad you came."
"Yeah." Suddenly a strong cold breeze came. It was snowing earlier, so it was almost freezing. I shivered and so did Harry. "Let's go back to the castle."
Harry says pulling his jacket over his chest more. He stands and I put my book and papers away. He offered his hand and helped me up. We walked back into the the castel in silence. Ron and Hermione ended up finding us, so Harry left me at the staircase.
"Rem, I'll see you later, okay?" He says after he see's his friends. I nod and bow my head down and turn to walk away. He puts a hand on my shoulder and says, "Get some sleep. It'll be okay."
Then he walks away and I walk up to the Common Room alone. I get to the knocker and it asks,
"Whats greater than God, worse than the devil, the rich don't want it the poor have it, and if you drink it you die?"
"Nothing." I mutter. The door opens and I step into the Common Room. Joel stands up from his Armchair and apporaches me.
"Rem. Are you Okay?" he asks. I just stand in front of him and look into his eyes. My own eyes begin to fill with tears. He pulls me into his arms and holds me as I let them fall into his sweater. I sob loudly and he rests his head on top of mine.
We're just standing there as he says comforting words like, "It's okay," or "It won't last forever," and "You'll get through this you'll see."
After a while, I pull back and look into his eyes. "Thank you."
*****************************************
The next day was a Sunday so everyone either slept in or they were doing homework in the library. Usually my homework is finished early, but this time I hadn't had a chance to finish. The library was too loud and crowded for me to concentrate well so I stayed in the common room by the window. I didn't change out of my pyjamas today so I couldn't go outside. Thankfully Joel stayed behind with me. He and I worked for about two hours and I was on the last assignment while he still had two more left.
"Hey, Rem. last night you came back and you we're really sad." Joel asks. I look up from my Potions paper. (Potions usually takes longer, I can hardy brew a single thing well) "I was having a horrible day." I explain.
"Sorry to do that to you."
"No its fine. I was going to say that if you ever need me for anything that you just need to tell me and I'll help you. Its okay to ask for help you know?" He says with a small smile. I genuinely smile back and nod.
"I'll be sure to remember that. Well lets finish this. Then I want to know how your day went yesterday." He nods and we both turn back to our work. After another hour, I finish. He still has his Charms assignment left to finish so I pull out my book and start to read. After another hour Joel puts his papers away.
"Okay I finished." He says. He turns to the clock on the other wall. It reads that its three fifteen in the afternoon.
"Well that took a while."
"No kidding." I remark as I finish the paragraph and put my book to the side.
"So how was robe shopping yesterday?"
"Not horrible. I went with Anthony Goldstein and Michael Corner. They also needed robes so we just decided, hey lets go together. So we spent a few hours looking for the right ones. Then we went to Honeydukes and there we saw Demetri who was looking pretty down. So I asked him what was up and he thought that Joy was upset with him."
"Yeah I could see why." I remark more to myself.
"Yeah. Then we went to Zonkos and came back here after a few butterbeers." He says. "How was your day?"
"Besides sulking and wanting to use the killing curse on everyone?" I begin in monotone. "Fairly decently. We went to Honeydukes and then we went shopping. Everyone tried on dresses but me. I didn't feel like it. So I just found one on my own and I bought it without showing it."
"Oh." He says. "Well do you like it?"
"Oh yes. It wasn't the dress the dress is really cool, I know you'll like it." I say shaking me head, "I should apologise to them though. They had to put up with my attitude all day."
"Well tonight have dinner. You skipped last night and you skipped breakfast and lunch. Are you even hungry?" He asks realising that I haven't eaten in about twenty four hours.
"Yeah a bit." I say. "I'll eat tonight." Joel and I talk until its time for dinner. Clover came back from the library and joined us as we walked to the Great Hall. Harry, Ron, and Hermione came over and asked me if I was okay. I told them I was fine and we left to our own designated tables. We ate our dinner and everything was fine. I was talking and laughing almost as normally as I usually did. When it was time to leave, Joy approached me in the Hallway.
"Hey, are you alright? Yesterday you were really upset." She says. Joel and Clover were behind me and they waited for me. But I nodded at them saying that it was okay for them to go without me.
"Yeah I'm much better now." I say in a much lighter tone. "Hey, could you tell the girls that I'm sorry About yesterday. I was really upset."
"Yeah, it's no problem. Listen, when they said they told you everything, what exactly did they mean? Rose and Dana, I mean." She asks cautiously.
"You were upset. You had gotten an owl from someone and you met him and you had to turn him down because you already had a date to the ball. When you came back you pushed Demitri so you felt bad." I explain not giving her the whole truth. "Thats all."
"Oh." She says relived. "Did they happen to say who I met?"
I thought for a moment. Should I tell her? I could make things bad for her and her other friends, but if I'm quiet it'll make things bad between us....
"No. They left that part out when I asked them who it was. They refused to say."
"Oh. Okay. Well I should be getting back now." She says with a small tone of disbelief in her voice.
"Alright, well I'll see you tomorrow." I say as I turn to walk up the stairs. Joy turns and goes down to the basement.
The knocker asks, "What is it that no man ever yet see, Which never was, but is to be?"
"Tomorrow." I respond. I open the door and step into the common room. Joel and Clover are waiting for me.
"How was it?" Clover asks with curiosity.
"Fine." I say as I walk to the stairs. "Well I'm a bit tired, so I'll see you two bright and early okay?"
"Okay." Joel says turning to the right side of the common room where his dorms are.
"Good night you two." He walks up and Clover and I go up to our dorms.
. *******************************
Well that was a fun chapter! Wasn't it! Okay so bye bye now! GOTTA FINISH GAME OF THRONES!!!!!